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bitterandtwisted posted:The ability to bend spoons with your mind except in scientifically controlled environments. The ability to see the future in totally inconsequential ways; e.g. you can see events 10,000 years into the future but no sooner or later
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 11:37 |
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# ? Apr 25, 2024 23:55 |
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Palpek posted:bullied_kid's_fucked_up_fantasy.txt Why would that be a fantasy? Are you thinking of murdering them over and over again? The ability to untangle a slinky no matter how tangled in under a minute flat.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 11:43 |
You can do card tricks with real magic
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 11:48 |
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The ability to teleport small coins from your pocket to behind people's ears. The ability to have perfect aim with any NERF gun.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 11:59 |
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ur skin can turn pruny whenev u want invisibility from dogs can fold deadly sharp paper airplanes perfect sitting posture can take shell off hard boiled eggs in 1 piece w/one hand metal hair
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 12:32 |
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your cum is made of wood
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 12:33 |
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the power to play video games really well but none of the ones that are esports
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 12:35 |
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the power to seduce anyone but only up until the point of physical contact
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 12:37 |
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amazing twerking only when nobody's looking
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 12:38 |
unreliable invisibility. your clothes don't become invisible.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 12:59 |
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You have prehensile hair but you cannot control it and it hurts when you cut it also it moves when it is cut also it is worms your hair is worms!
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 13:02 |
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Motherfucker posted:You have prehensile hair but you cannot control it and it hurts when you cut it The power to control the pattern (but not the rate) of your own male pattern baldness
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 13:03 |
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Ability to fly, but backwards only.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 13:35 |
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You have the strength of 1.5 men, but only if 100% of your calories come from Gogurt.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:17 |
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"Oh Yeah" by Yello plays whenever you take your shirt off. e: this one Murray Mantoinette fucked around with this message at 14:25 on Aug 2, 2014 |
# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:21 |
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st1LL_51ngl3 posted:"Oh Yeah" by Yello plays whenever you take your shirt off. and only you can hear it
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:25 |
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you have an 11 inch dick, but only while you're asleep
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:28 |
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nobody can stop you from eating poison
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:32 |
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Quickscope420dad posted:
Everybody else just hears Yakety Sax instead.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:41 |
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A prehensile penis that is also sentient, and racist.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 14:45 |
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Microvision - the ability to see microscopic things. But you can't turn it off. e: At least you can always see your penis.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 15:01 |
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Splatmaster posted:A prehensile penis that is also sentient, and racist. yeah but you can still name your dick Grand Wizard so its not a complete waste
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 15:01 |
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Splatmaster posted:A prehensile penis that is also sentient, and racist. Vampire Hunter P
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 15:10 |
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Every time you wake up you become a different person, but you're identical to the person who you were when you went to sleep, body, memories, personality, everything is exactly the same.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:01 |
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The ability to look like anyone who's currently on the Most Wanted list of the country you currently reside in.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:04 |
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You can shrink yourself really tiny but you suffocate if you do because oxygen molecules are now too large for your lungs to process.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:05 |
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MEat vision - the ability to fire meat out of eyes
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:05 |
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The ability to become a child again (with all your adult wisdom), but only when a certain ex-mod is around.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:06 |
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Dez Orwell posted:Every time you wake up you become a different person, but you're identical to the person who you were when you went to sleep, body, memories, personality, everything is exactly the same.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:06 |
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the power to turn your whole body into foreskin
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:08 |
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Willed spontaneous human combustion (your own)
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:08 |
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Zzulu posted:the power to turn your whole body into foreskin the power to turn your whole foreskin into snakes
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:09 |
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the power to perfectly read lips over any distance but only for languages you don't speak
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:11 |
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The power to make people laugh, but only at your expense. e: The ability to act in any and all roles in the musical "The Ugliest Weenie." Zanzibar Ham fucked around with this message at 19:38 on Aug 2, 2014 |
# ? Aug 2, 2014 19:11 |
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The power to run faster than sound, but you can't stop.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 21:31 |
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Psychokinesis, but you can only use it to masturbate. Actually that'd be a pretty cool ability.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 21:40 |
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The power to fart in morse code.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 21:44 |
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Once every hour you can teleport two inches in any direction.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 21:48 |
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Coming into physical contact with your dick is as pleasurable as the purest hit of heroin, but your dick naturally stinks so badly that noone can even bear to go near you / it
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 22:09 |
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# ? Apr 25, 2024 23:55 |
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You can shapeshift to look like Ernest Borgnine.
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# ? Aug 2, 2014 22:20 |