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Blazing Ownager
Jun 2, 2007

I ain't got time to bleed.

You know what? The original movie actually was pretty funny. It understood brevity and moderation and had some pretty memorable sight gags, including a couple recurring ones. It was also quotable for amusing bits and not just some "GET IN MA BELLY" meme. The second film was a lovely rehash with an even dumber setting just going back to the 60s, which ruins the whole point of the series. Then the third film was a nigh unwatchable piece of crap that's mostly faded from memory at this point.

Every tolerably amusing moment in the sequels were just watered down lovely versions of gags that mostly worked the first time, except now they go on too long and repeatedly hit you in the head with the punchline. And then call back it or two or three times like an obnoxious friend elbowing you in the ribs and asking if you "GET IT?"

I mean the first movie wasn't perfect but holy poo poo things went downhill fast.

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Waltzing Along
Jun 14, 2008

May your eyes be opened by the wonderful


I like the one where the thing happens that is funny.

Tujague
May 8, 2007

You'll be relieved to know that only half of my pony porn collection involves rape
(The rest involves bondage)


This new trend of boring shitlords starting a thread to contain their bold opinions about movies from more than a decade ago is awesome

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010



Tujague posted:

This new trend of boring shitlords starting a thread to contain their bold opinions about movies from more than a decade ago is awesome
this is the face of "high-content" threadmaking, everyone.

gggiiimmmppp
Feb 15, 2004

Just as a person haunted by a ghost exhibits madness, the best of the he-goats, attracted by the many she-goats, engaged in erotic activities and naturally forgot his real business of self-realization


the most memorable thing about the third austin powers for me is that I got my only DMCA notification for downloading a cam from gnutella

the second one was worth it for heather graham

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010



lets just pretend we're posting in a thread where the op was this

Phlairdon
Apr 15, 2003



Can't this be said about any comedy sequel? I mean, last night I watched the clip of the gang fight from Anchorman 2, which I hadn't seen, and it was just a rehash of the jokes from the first one. It was terrible.

Absalom Baird
Jul 13, 2010


C'mon dude, Michael Caine. MICHAEL. CAINE!

And Beyonce!

Idiot Kicker
Jun 13, 2007


I can't believe I'm stooping to this level, but there were good moments in the sequels. Maybe it's nostalgia? The Preparation H joke, for instance, is great when you're a stupid kid.

grope proof vest
Jan 11, 2006



Phlairdon posted:

Can't this be said about any comedy sequel? I mean, last night I watched the clip of the gang fight from Anchorman 2, which I hadn't seen, and it was just a rehash of the jokes from the first one. It was terrible.

Pretty much, Airplane 2 is basically Airplane 1 from an alternate universe.

Guancho
Aug 22, 2010

Heineken? Fuck that shit! PABST BLUE RIBBON!


it's gooooooolllllddddddd

smoke and a pancake

SymfonyMan
Jul 13, 2001

Back in action!


This thread doesn't work because it's a non controversial opinion. EVERYONE thinks that the first movie was the best (you aren't a real person if you think other-wise). The first was a clever take on the classic spy genre while the sequels were wackiness tied up in fart humor.

That's actually the working title for pre-production of part 4,

Austin Powers 4: More Farts

http://imgur.com/gallery/NrIka

a bone to pick
Sep 14, 2011


SymfonyMan posted:

This thread doesn't work because it's a non controversial opinion. EVERYONE thinks that the first movie was the best (you aren't a real person if you think other-wise). The first was a clever take on the classic spy genre while the sequels were wackiness tied up in fart humor.

That's actually the working title for pre-production of part 4,

Austin Powers 4: More Farts

nah gently caress you and gently caress everybody else.

Danny devito as mini-me was enough to make goldmember both the shittiest and best austin powers.

BigBoss
Jan 26, 2012


high way to the cum zone. gonna take you right in to the cuuuuuuuuum zooooooooone

gannyGrabber
May 8, 2012

Curses are the crutches of inarticulate motherfuckers.


I had a friend with an austin powers sound board, was pretty sweet.

Smokey
Feb 8, 2008

brb a nigga gotta doo doo


Guancho posted:

smoke and a pancake

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010



BigBoss posted:

high way to the cum zone. gonna take you right in to the cuuuuuuuuum zooooooooone
cum on down... down town...

The Tao Jones
Oct 9, 2007

What's a hole doing in my TARDIS?

That's all well and good, but what about the Matrix trilogy?

Parallax Scroll
Nov 13, 2009

spiderman

watch your step in the cum zone

PUGGERNAUT
Nov 14, 2013

who's a good doggy

Phlairdon posted:

Can't this be said about any comedy sequel? I mean, last night I watched the clip of the gang fight from Anchorman 2, which I hadn't seen, and it was just a rehash of the jokes from the first one. It was terrible.

wayne's world 2 tho

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006
GTVA Celois

WATER WORLD WAS SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010



best movie quote

"what Happened here??? whys there so much cum? is there a Serial Cum Splasher on the loose?"
"No Son... This Here Is tHe Cum Zone..."

Orchestrated Mess
Dec 12, 2009

Fuck art. Let's dance.


i will pay lots of money to see a sequel and i'm literally the problem

Parallax Scroll
Nov 13, 2009

spiderman

which one had minime, that was the best one

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010



Parallax Scroll posted:

which one had minime, that was the best one

circ dick soleil
Sep 26, 2012


Κεεπ
ιτ
ρεαλ


i amg ay

Alejandro Sanchez
Apr 24, 2010



Tujague posted:

This new trend of boring shitlords you're a huge loving enjoyable human being bitch turd about movies from more than a decade ago is awesome

PUGGERNAUT
Nov 14, 2013

who's a good doggy

it's a bit nutty

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006
GTVA Celois

gunna make a "empire strikes back is overrated and poo poo" thread next

Copley Depot
Jul 9, 2009

This space reserved for future text.

gggiiimmmppp
Feb 15, 2004

Just as a person haunted by a ghost exhibits madness, the best of the he-goats, attracted by the many she-goats, engaged in erotic activities and naturally forgot his real business of self-realization


"Austin Powers: The Spy Who ------- Me" (PG-13) -- This analysis bears a warning.

Our media analyses pull no punches. Descriptively, this one is nearly as vulgar as the movie. But we tell it like it is. We do not use foul language or terms but we say what is there. Please understand that this movie was a very vulgar movie -- and we tell you how vulgar it is. I will soon forget this movie -- no problem -- I just wish I could forget the sight of the eigght or nine year old little girl in the audience.......with her parents.

Before I get into the dirt, I need to warn you about this commentary but this stuff was IN THE MOVIE! Right there! Onscreen! Maybe this analysis and commentary will wake up some of us to what the entertainment industry is doing. Remember, THIS IS A PG-13 MOVIE!

At the beginning of the movie, there was a great deal of nudity which was very lightly masked as Powers pranced nude through what appeared to be a mall. The nudity was so bold and the masking so weak that as Powers spread his legs apart in one scene, the stretch of the tendons in his crotch was visible. In scenes of full nudity his genitalia were ghosted fleshtone; defocused. In other scenes of nudity, convenient objects were used to hide his genitalia -- and ONLY his genitalia. Convenient objects used included furniture, a clock, and textblocks of the names of actors/actresses. In one instance a baby's head was used to hide Powers' genitalia -- and yes, the baby was facing Powers, in the same way DiCaprio's head in *Titanic* was used to hide Winslett's genitalia, but the baby's head was much smaller in perspective than DiCaprio's, thus, less was hidden. Though the baby was an animated baby (like the *Dancing Baby*), what pedophilial signal do you suppose was sent by this scene?

In another case, a bowl of fruit was used to hide Powers' genitalia. In the bowl stood upright was a peeled exaggerated banana with hints of human anatomical features. The banana was grabbed by a hand which ripped it out of the basket. As it was ripped away, two pieces of round fruit attached themselves to the bottom of the banana on either side. And Powers grimaced with pain as it was ripped away.

In another period in the movie, Powers and his opposite, Felicity [deleted] were in a tent with a light casting their shadows on the tent wall, silhouetting their activities from their left. Powers was on his hands and knees. Felicity [deleted] was kneeled behind and to the side of him fetching things out of a long duffle-type bag lying horizontally on a bench at Powers' right side. This configuration of shadows made it seem that Felicity [deleted] was directly behind him. As Felicity [deleted] reached in the bag, the shadows made it appear that she was reaching inside Power's colon. As she stretched to reach deeper into the bag, the shadows appeared as if she was slowly shoving her arm into him up to above her elbow. Dr. Larry Burthoft for Focus on the Family claims this act, when done by homosexuals, is called "fisting." If this portrayal is a homosexual suggestion, it is not the only one in the movie. Felicity [deleted] pulled several things out of the bag, which appeared to come from inside Powers. She also used a mallet to drive a tennis racket into the bag.......handle-first. (Doesn't make any sense to me, either -- driving a tennis racket into a bag?)

A rather agile and limber young lady in this movie was flopping around until she ended up doing the splits...upside down, with her legs spread as opposite and level as airplane wings. Fine acrobatics until a couple other females used the upside-down girl's leg-crouch continuum as some kind of a table, putting their elbows on it.

In another case, chess pieces were stroked and licked on by Powers and one of his sex partners. Two bishops, each with a bulbous headpiece crowned with a small knob, were arranged side-by-side to suggest female breasts. Powers fondled the knobs atop the headpieces.

Just one more (of many) to finally convince you of the vulgarity of this movie. Imagine a "Buck Rogers" space rocket with round fuel tanks at either side of the bottom of the body of the craft. That was a centerpiece of many discussions about the slang names -- ALL of them -- for male genitalia.

One more quick one -- Dr. Evil sensually sucked his little finger.

Absalom Baird
Jul 13, 2010


The Spy Who Cucked Me

hemophilia
Dec 28, 2006

My Blood Doesn't Clot


The first one is okay, but I just loving die inside and lose interest when Burt Baccarach starts playing.

I actually liked The Spy Who Shagged Me but I don't remember much about it because it's been several years. My memory wants to tell me there were good jokes but it falls apart as a movie. And the third one is just best left forgotten.

the culminator
Oct 29, 2012


scary movie 4 had a lot of funny scenes

Phlairdon
Apr 15, 2003



PUGGERNAUT posted:

wayne's world 2 tho

Sadly, I was late getting to Wayne's World. Finally saw the first one only about a month ago, still haven't seen the second one.

Parallax Scroll
Nov 13, 2009

spiderman

hot shots deux had that scene where he kills all those guys

BKPR
Nov 11, 2007

i'm the motherfuckin trapezoid

i feel Austin POWERED up from this fresh thread op!

Pumpy Muffinz
Aug 11, 2008

Banned?

The third one did have michael cane delivering a good line. "There are two things I can't stand, people who can't accept another culture, and the Dutch"

Justin Godscock
Oct 12, 2004

Aw, son of a bitch!

I would watch the poo poo out of an Austin Powers movie with Kevin Spacey as Dr. Evil and Danny DeVito as Mini-Me.

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Pumpy Muffinz
Aug 11, 2008

Banned?

Justin Godscock posted:

I would watch the poo poo out of an Austin Powers movie with Kevin Spacey as Dr. Evil and Danny DeVito as Mini-Me.

isn't that just It's always Sunny in Philadelphia?

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