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The Scottish Premiership Football League (and also lower-league chat, I guess) thread for this season - written up after 3 of the 4 European-playing teams got dumped out and most of the first set of fixtures have already been played. We spent ages trying to come up with loads of innovative ideas to implement but decided to just go with a name-change and a slightly altered last season's OP experience (original words by duckmaster). http://spfl.co.uk/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2RaMLvhOAOo https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCakRszbIjjGYtFrDPeg5Ieg https://twitter.com/spflextra/lists/spfl-2013-14 Status of Scottish Teams in European Competition circa Wk#1 of SPFL: Scottish Cup Winners 2014 - St. Johnstone, put out by Spartak Trnava of Slovenia in the Europa League qualifiers (3-2). Scottish League Cup Winners 2014 - Aberdeen, put out by Real Sociedad of Spain in the Europa League qualifiers (5-2). 3rd in SPFL 13/14 - Motherwell, put out by UMF Stjarnan of Iceland in the Europa League qualifiers (5-4). SPFL Winners 13/14 - Celtic, Aberdeen  Who? Aberdeen FC, they play in red and their stadium/city is miles away from civilization so try not to be too hard on them. The strongest squad they've had in decades and now they have David Goodwillie, the rapist duckmaster didn't want last season anyway. Word on the street is that they can't even kick a jellybean. Last season? 3rd place, League Cup winners. Celtic  Who? Were forced to retire one of their favourite songs because all the competition mentioned in it hosed off to the most exciting league in Scotland. Currently trying to rhyme St. Mirren with something about not being moved. Last season? 1st place.  Who? As a famous man said, a Dundee divided against itself cannot stand - mostly because the years of inbreeding produced hands for feet and feet for hands. Last season? 1st place in the Scottish Championship. Dundee United  Who? Dundee Utd produced the first Scottish player to be signed by a European team in an age (McGeady was Irish, right?) & seem to have managed to keep the rest of their squad, they are managed by Jackie McNamara who still looks about 14. Last season? 4th place.  Who? Hamilton deservedly beat Hibernian in the Playoff place last season & completed a double loss for Edinburgh, which was hilarious for everybody else. Last season? Playoff Place in Scottish Championship. Inverness Caledonian Thistle  Who? How the hell are this bunch still in this league. You drive for hours and hours to get there and when you finally arrive you realise you're in Inverness. How do they attract players to play for them? I'm baffled. Last season? 5th place. Kilmarnock  Who? Squirrels on their crest! Squirrels! The closest thing to Rangers we have left in the SPL. But the squirrels! Did you see the squirrels? There are no squirrels in Ayrshire, unfortunately. The people there live on something like a pound a day and have eaten them all. Last season? 9th place. Motherwell  Who? Led out of Europe by Stuart McCall already, Motherwell will need to do well in their rivalry with Hamilton who are currently winning in the 'produced a decent player' competition 2-1. Last season? 2nd place. Partick Thistle  Who? Finally, Glasgow's second best team is back in the SPL. Don't really know much about them except when someone in Glasgow asks if you support Celtic or Rangers they're actually trying to find out if you're Catholic or Protestant; the smart answer has always been to reply, "Thistle", so presumably supported by Jews etc. Last season? 10th place. Ross County  Who? Unbelievably this lot are from north of Inverness. I've never been there, I'm not entirely sure they actually exist. Pretty much the proof that football is all about TV money these days and the six people in Ross County (wherever that is) don't need to buy tickets to support their club. Last season? 7th place. St Johnstone  Who? They won the Scottish cup last season, made millions selling Stevie May masks & are out of Europe already - even worse, though, they just sold Stevie May to a 2nd tier English team for £800k. What name will Scottish neds shout at men with long hair now? Let's hope St. Johnstone use that money to bring in Georgious Samaras. Last season? 6th place, Scottish Cup winners. St Mirren  Who? St Mirren play in Paisley, just outside Glasgow, which is kind of like visiting Hitlers room in hell. Haven't really done anything interesting lately, and probably won't in the future. Last season? 8th place. Transfers OUT:  +£17m (est.) Transfers IN:  -£FREE/On Loan The Hausu Usher fucked around with this message at 17:14 on Aug 10, 2014 |
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Aug 10, 2014 15:06
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Ugh.
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Aug 10, 2014 15:23
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Lol six minutes extra time and you still lose to the Jambos, get hosed huns. That's what you get for stealing our telly spot. EDIT: Also you missed one more fact change in the OP, the badcock rapist now plays for us, not Dundee Utd. Coohoolin fucked around with this message at 15:30 on Aug 10, 2014 |
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Aug 10, 2014 15:27
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Legia Warsaw request meeting with Celtic over Champions League place http://www.theguardian.com/football/2014/aug/10/legia-warsaw-champions-league-rematch-celtic quote:“I call you to act according to the spirit of the game and rules of fair play – to issue a joint statement to the Uefa disciplinary bodies. Let’s meet in Warsaw or in Glasgow and let’s settle this matter honourably,” wrote the Legia co-owner Dariusz Mioduski in the letter.  No.The only thing that would make this a universal funny would be Maribor dumping us out of the next round, which is very much possible.
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Aug 10, 2014 19:37
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If Scotland votes Yes for independence then this is the last season where I will have to listen through some boring pointless report about a bad pointless irrelevant football match between two shite teams from over 9000 miles away.
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Aug 10, 2014 20:22
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BisonDollah posted:The only thing that would make this a universal funny would be Maribor dumping us out of the next round, which is very much possible.
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Aug 10, 2014 20:35
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Semprini posted:...and then drawing Legia in the Europa League. I want this so bad, anyway here's the yearly reminder that to watch Scottish football in the US you have to pay $15 dollars extra on your cable bill and will only get a few games a week along with alot of Rugby and Aussie Rules Football.
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Aug 10, 2014 22:43
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I'm astounded Celtic haven't spent a penny this transfer window, especially given the second chance for CL qualification & Foster bringing in £7m or so. World-class paperwork doing is something to get excited about sometimes, but not most of the time. When Lennon was here we seemed like we'd rather spread £4-5m over a few players in the hope one of them would quadruple in value instead of becoming ambitious and signing one player of proven quality. Watt's sale muddies the "Celtic will give youth a chance" mantra, we're down to the last of the the sell-on projects in van Dijk & Delia seems to be ushering in the cheapest age Celtic fans have seen for a fair while. I guess Henderson & McGregor becoming first-teamers is a little something to celebrate. 
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Aug 12, 2014 17:28
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BisonDollah posted:I'm astounded Celtic haven't spent a penny this transfer window, especially given the second chance for CL qualification & Foster bringing in £7m or so. World-class paperwork doing is something to get excited about sometimes, but not most of the time. When Lennon was here we seemed like we'd rather spread £4-5m over a few players in the hope one of them would quadruple in value instead of becoming ambitious and signing one player of proven quality. Watt's sale muddies the "Celtic will give youth a chance" mantra, we're down to the last of the the sell-on projects in van Dijk & Delia seems to be ushering in the cheapest age Celtic fans have seen for a fair while. And this is us when we've been making a relative fortune on sales and CL revenue. Imagine what will happen if/when we go out to Maribor 
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Aug 13, 2014 00:37
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Her Dryer posted:And this is us when we've been making a relative fortune on sales and CL revenue. Imagine what will happen if/when we go out to Maribor We won't go out to Maribor UEFA will uphold Legia's apeal
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Aug 13, 2014 08:57
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Happy to see that Hibs are still poo poo.
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Aug 17, 2014 14:07
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Frungy! posted:Happy to see that Hibs are still poo poo. It's reassuring that some things never change Was surprised at how poor Dundee United were at weekend , actually thought they would beat Celtic .
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Aug 17, 2014 17:20
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Frungy! posted:Happy to see that Hibs are still poo poo. Forever and ever.
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Aug 23, 2014 23:48
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This is (not) our year.
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Aug 24, 2014 03:13
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Chas McGill posted:This is (not) our year. You know when you actually look at our squad.. it's not actually as good as its been hyped up to be. Of our three proven strikers McGinn is constantly being played as a winger, Rooney is brilliant and Goodwillie is just poo poo. I know DM is played a 4-1-2-3-5-2-1 or whatever it is but there's just no competition there. Cammy Smith is still a prospect at best, McManus has gone back out on loan and we haven't seen Shankland yet. Is he even getting on the bench? Still no left back which means Considine has to do it. This is a problem because he's not very good at it and also means Hayes has to stay back a bit on the left wing which in turn affects his delivery to Rooney (nothing will effect Goodwillie because he's just poo poo). It's also a problem because he's our third best CB which means if Anderson/Reynolds get injured/suspended our fourth best CB has to step in, who is presumably Taylor and it's too early to call on how good he really is. For cover there's Shuggy and... some kids. Then in the middle you've got Jack, who still sits too deep. Flood, who seems to have forgotten how to pass forward. Robson, who by now must be about ready for a glass of cocoa and a good rest under a tartan blanket. And to cover for them we've got Nicky Low and... some kids. This Monakena character is a winger I think and there's obviously Pawlett but a bit worrying if he's diving again. Don't rest on your laurels, Pete. So our first 11 is capable of top 3. But one suspension and a couple of injuries and DM might not only need to replace them but to move other players around to accommodate that. And then it's a different team entirely. Rant over. Goodwillie still poo poo.
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Aug 24, 2014 08:46
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its taken a while but im finally behind the idea of the top two teams in scotland moving into the english premier league
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Aug 24, 2014 15:16
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Russ posted:its taken a while but im finally behind the idea of the top two teams in scotland moving into the english premier league I think we'd miss Inverness and Hamilton Chas McGill posted:This is (not) our year. What's the difference this year ? Aberdeen looked pretty decent for most of last year and seemed actually capable of consistently giving Celtic a hard time. Could be worse though, you could have to watch Motherwell this year
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Aug 25, 2014 00:37
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Has Radge ever came back since embarrassing himself last season?
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Aug 25, 2014 01:17
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jre posted:What's the difference this year ? Aberdeen looked pretty decent for most of last year and seemed actually capable of consistently giving Celtic a hard time. Could be worse though, you could have to watch Motherwell this year The danger is Aberdeen believing the hype from last year and resting on their laurels. Also Robson and Anderson are getting ooooold. If we could just sign a left-back I'd be a LOT more comfortable. There were rumours flying about that the board were ready to spring cash for Graeme Shinnie, whatever happened to that? Would love to see him at Pittodrie. Also he and Ryan Jack are best mates for some reason.
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Aug 25, 2014 13:06
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jre posted:What's the difference this year ? Aberdeen looked pretty decent for most of last year and seemed actually capable of consistently giving Celtic a hard time. Could be worse though, you could have to watch Motherwell this year duckmaster posted:You know when you actually look at our squad.. it's not actually as good as its been hyped up to be. I agree with this. I think we still have fairly decent squad, it's just that last season was probably a bit of an anomaly in that we hit good form at (mostly) the right times. Too many players are inconsistent and too many are ancient. Coohoolin posted:The danger is Aberdeen believing the hype from last year and resting on their laurels. Also Robson and Anderson are getting ooooold.
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Aug 25, 2014 13:37
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Coohoolin posted:The danger is Aberdeen believing the hype from last year and resting on their laurels. Also Robson and Anderson are getting ooooold. The board made an enquiry and a loose "five figure bid" and ICT said no. They think he's worth six figures, which he is. I expect he'll stay with Inverness for the rest of the season and try and go south; his brother did it so he knows it's possible.
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Aug 26, 2014 09:12
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duckmaster posted:The board made an enquiry and a loose "five figure bid" and ICT said no. They think he's worth six figures, which he is. I expect he'll stay with Inverness for the rest of the season and try and go south; his brother did it so he knows it's possible. His brother went south to sit on a bench somewhere and now Stuart Armstrong is getting callups to the national side. Don't they see moving south is poison to their careers? Remember Fraser, Fyvie, Grimmer, etc? What the gently caress are they doing now?
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Aug 26, 2014 11:18
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Earning more money, probably living in cheaper places.
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Aug 26, 2014 11:28
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Maribor
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Aug 26, 2014 21:53
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I'll raise a tumbler of Moray Cup to Maribor.
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Aug 26, 2014 22:08
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The funny thing is I don't even think we're good enough for the Europa league. When we played Maribor last week I thought how lucky we were, because they are shite, total shite. We're just worse. Can't defend, don't make chances. That's not a good combination.
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Aug 26, 2014 22:21
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biglads posted:I'll raise a tumbler of Moray Cup to Maribor.
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Aug 26, 2014 22:40
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trashcangammy posted:The funny thing is I don't even think we're good enough for the Europa league. When we played Maribor last week I thought how lucky we were, because they are shite, total shite. We're just worse. Can't defend, don't make chances. That's not a good combination. Created enough chances to win both games but don't have a striker worth talking about though so we're out. 
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Aug 27, 2014 00:47
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http://babb.telegraph.co.uk/2014/08/maribors-goal-against-celtic-was-the-worst-thing-to-happen-to-alan-mcinally-ever/
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Aug 27, 2014 15:38
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http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/28966439 Derek Adams & his dad got punted today. As a Ross County fan I'm pretty surprised it happened this quickly, but with the rumours around how Adams basically refused to talk to the players outside of training & games and and other things about a toxic atmosphere at the club I can't say I'm unhappy. He's obviously done amazing things for a pishy team from the Highlands but the youth system has basically been abandoned & we've had utterly no consistency with the playing stuff, as George Adams has done a dreadful job of actually keeping our players who'd done well by refusing to even initiate contract discussions until the season is almost over. And so we end up having to replace half a squad every summer, & then half of those replacements get canned in January when it turns out they don't make the grade. It's a really unsustainable way of operating a football club. But then we get stories like this and I suddenly want Derek to return. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/28975886 If Danny Lennon really is being considered then just mark us down for relegation now, if you hadn't already. Bookies have him down as the early favourite, though they also have Terry "I'll never manage in Scotland again" Butcher as second favourite so they may be making this all up. I hope so.
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Aug 28, 2014 20:43
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Jesus Christ hibsquote:Posted at 17:01
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Aug 30, 2014 17:10
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Hibs poo poo
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Aug 30, 2014 17:12
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African AIDS cum posted:Hibs poo poo IS. Hibs IS poo poo
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Aug 30, 2014 20:48
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Please PM me if you are a potential gloryhunter looking to follow a big club and I'll be happy to talk you through the process of becoming an Accies Plastic. Cheers.
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Aug 31, 2014 14:29
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Russ posted:Please PM me if you are a potential gloryhunter looking to follow a big club and I'll be happy to talk you through the process of becoming an Accies Plastic. Cheers. Becoming a Caley plastic could gain you a nice 330ml bottle of the Moray Cup.
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Aug 31, 2014 17:13
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Today I ran into someone (in the US) wearing a Celtic shirt, an old one with Carling as the sponsor. I mentioned today's result and he was confused, which seemed strange. I clarified and he said "Oh. To be honest I bought this more for Carling than anything else." WHO DOES THAT
guppy fucked around with this message at 18:18 on Aug 31, 2014 |
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Aug 31, 2014 18:13
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jre posted:Jesus Christ hibs Hibs are poo poo and it's funny.
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Aug 31, 2014 18:40
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Frungy! posted:Hibs are poo poo and it's funny. It's gone beyond funny and it's now weird that they are so consistently bad no matter who the manager or players are. They appear to be cursed I take it radge is still in hiding after last season ?
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Aug 31, 2014 22:27
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guppy posted:Today I ran into someone (in the US) wearing a Celtic shirt, an old one with Carling as the sponsor. I mentioned today's result and he was confused, which seemed strange. I clarified and he said "Oh. To be honest I bought this more for Carling than anything else." WHO DOES THAT Americans.
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Aug 31, 2014 23:20
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guppy posted:Today I ran into someone (in the US) wearing a Celtic shirt, an old one with Carling as the sponsor. I mentioned today's result and he was confused, which seemed strange. I clarified and he said "Oh. To be honest I bought this more for Carling than anything else." WHO DOES THAT I once knew a girl who loved Guns N'Roses clothes and didn't realise they were a band, she just thought it was a cool brand or something. She was also American.
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Sep 1, 2014 15:36
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