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GEExCEE

here's mine:

i'm all alone on a desert island, wearing just my socks. Suddenly a water nymph arises from the foamy spray, and crawls up to me. shes got the upper body of zora, and the lower body of Ariel. my ideal woman. she begins peeling my socks off, and sucking my toes. Mostly the big one. Just sucking and sucking and its giving her so much pleasure that she orgasms, intensely. Im aroused, and ejaculate my seed onto her back and buttocks before she coos happily and flops back into the surf.

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Strontosaurus


no arms, no legs, insect face, and huge fake tits

bacalou



I wanna go to a little place, you may have heard of it...


I call it fart gently caress hell

GEExCEE

bacalou posted:

I wanna go to a little place, you may have heard of it...


I call it fart gently caress hell

beneath the rolling hills and verdant pines, under the mountain lies an inferno of anal brutality

Gross Dude

Gross Dude
I've always imagined being in a magic tournament and seeing a drop dead gorgeous babe, only to find out that I'm playing her round one! I'll think quick and make up some Magic pick up lines, "Hey, did someone cast path to exile on your butt? Cause it's outta this world!" "Excuse me, do you have a blue mana? I need someone to twiddle my Bone Flute." She'll be enthused that she's finally found someone else, in a Magic tournament of all places, that shares an interest of hers. Then, she'll pat my cheek after I beat her on turn three with 20/20 Arcbound Ravager and I'll never see her again.

CAT BRUSH

He's circlin' round my ankle
He's circlin' round my ankle
He needs some pettin' and lovin' on his hide
Oh kitty won't you come inside

angela lansbury and alanis morrisette engaging in sensual analingus as i enter from behind

GEExCEE

I'm walking up the marble steps to the research branch of a special library. I gather my books from the librarian, each a rare and ancient text. I take them to my study bench, and take out my notepad. Water isn't even allowed in here. I open the first book of the day. Edison, New Jersey. 1960-1970. each and every virile man has a cum entry. I glance at the first page. Aaron Aanders. The sample is a bit musty but well preserved. I look forward to my work.

Matoi Ryuko



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLctf4o6feQ

pig slut lisa

so hungey for burriot


a 69 with a buff black version of myself

WhenInRome

now i'm not saying that i'm the coolest person here, but you have to consider the facts


a hot buff Great Old One, tentacles writhing as i slowly bring my mouth to his. wait. where is his mouth? thats when i realize. it has hundreds of mouths, and they are all screaming, oh god make the screaming stop, my mind is torn to shreds by the dread knowledge i hear whispering under the horrific screaming. it wont stop

anime fuck pillow


The house is quiet. I slip through the unlocked window in the sun room unnoticed. The excitement is getting me riled up as I crouchwalk into the living room without so much as a peep. Expected noise comes from the kitchen, presumably my victim washing their dishes. The air still smells of pasta sauce and Parmesan cheese - I will rectify this soon enough, I muse to myself. I'm just around the edge of the kitchen and still they wash dishes totally unaware of my presence. I am totally erect. I dash around the corner and plunge into Nomates' rear end, and before he has time to react, I crush his head with my bear hands in the styling of The Mountain from Game of Thrones. We'll have a laugh about this later, I think, as his skull pulp slowly gurgles out the next anime I should watch.

Squirrel007



s my own d

ChairmanMeow

a kitty, in space

Strontosaurus posted:

no arms, no legs, insect face, and huge fake tits

3/4 PM me cutey

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



Gross Dude posted:

I've always imagined being in a magic tournament and seeing a drop dead gorgeous babe, only to find out that I'm playing her round one! I'll think quick and make up some Magic pick up lines, "Hey, did someone cast path to exile on your butt? Cause it's outta this world!" "Excuse me, do you have a blue mana? I need someone to twiddle my Bone Flute." She'll be enthused that she's finally found someone else, in a Magic tournament of all places, that shares an interest of hers. Then, she'll pat my cheek after I beat her on turn three with 20/20 Arcbound Ravager and I'll never see her again.

what kind of scrub has a fantasy of swinging with a 20/20 arcbound ravager

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You

Gross Dude posted:

I've always imagined being in a magic tournament and seeing a drop dead gorgeous babe, only to find out that I'm playing her round one! I'll think quick and make up some Magic pick up lines, "Hey, did someone cast path to exile on your butt? Cause it's outta this world!" "Excuse me, do you have a blue mana? I need someone to twiddle my Bone Flute." She'll be enthused that she's finally found someone else, in a Magic tournament of all places, that shares an interest of hers. Then, she'll pat my cheek after I beat her on turn three with 20/20 Arcbound Ravager and I'll never see her again.

Better be holding a stifle up because she's gonna get triggered as gently caress

The Rage

Chill out, dickwad.



I fall down a lot and my mother constantly mocks me for it

mazzi Chart Czar

holy fuck

The Rage posted:

I fall down a lot and my mother constantly mocks me for it

This but more nudity.

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



Chill la Chill posted:

what kind of scrub has a fantasy of swinging with a 20/20 arcbound ravager

marit Lange or gtfo

Angry Fish


my sexual fantasy is the OP.

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You

Chill la Chill posted:

marit Lange or gtfo

Who is marit?

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



Tonetta posted:

Who is marit?

GEExCEE

u place in lore top 8 at nationals yet tonetta??

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You

That's marit lage! I thought you night have been talking about my semi-mtgfamous friend mason lange, lol

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You

GEExCEE posted:

u place in lore top 8 at nationals yet tonetta??

I didnt get to go because work but I did get to the semi's in states and won like 300 dollars last week?

Convince me to give up my livelihood for my #mtgcareer

GEExCEE

you do you homie

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You
Where are there so many magic players in bring your own bobs?

GEExCEE

everyone on the internet is a loving huge nerd

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



I made top 8 at a PTQ last week I just wanted a surf trip in the middle of the semester

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



I want a skeleton girl to bench press me while I masturbate and then maybe finish on top of her so she can get some protein

this is a v real post, keeping it real in the yob

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You
Hahaha yeah I get to go to the pt but I'm totally gonna go "0-2" drop and tour hawaii

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You
My jizz moment is dealing 20 damage on turn 1 in modern with primetime

My other jizz moment is making money for playing retard games

Tonetta

Hitler Would Have Loved You
My biggest jizz moment tho is on my lunch break at work, when I rub one out into my vosses coffee pot, which eclipses when I watch him drink it

ZeroCount



a naked woman with seven heads and ten horns and upon their horns 10 crowns and upon her heads the name of blasphemy

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



Tonetta posted:

My biggest jizz moment tho is on my lunch break at work, when I rub one out into my vosses coffee pot, which eclipses when I watch him drink it

nice

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



ZeroCount posted:

a naked woman with seven heads and ten horns and upon their horns 10 crowns and upon her heads the name of blasphemy

I worship the whore of babylon according to heretical fundies AMA

ZeroCount



Chill la Chill posted:

I worship the whore of babylon according to heretical fundies AMA

will she go out with me

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay



Mary is a permanent virgin, hope this isn't a prob

ZeroCount



if anything that is more desirable

Ben Smash

Beat back the darkness at the edges of the night.

Putting gigantic fake breasts on GEExCEE and just going to town

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Salmiakki

christmas is coming the goose is getting fat


an army of skeletomns

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