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Quickscope420dad
Jun 30, 2014

I can drink 40 cups of tea in 1 second


Post micro-stories which end with intense cliffhangers.

For example:



"There was a sudden and intense knocking on the door. James turned his head to face it, sweat dripping down his brow. Calling out "Who's there?", James slowly withdraws his penis from the "

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Roy
Sep 24, 2007


i'm

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

Revengeful corpse out to kill Smell the stench, your guts will spill
Vomit for a mind, maggots for a cock With his axe the corpse will chop


John Stalvern waited. The lights above him blinked and sparked out of the air. There were demons in the base. He didn’t see them, but had expected them now for years. His warnings to Cernel Joson were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.

John was a space marine for fourteen years. When he was young he watched the spaceships and he said to dad “I want to be on the ships daddy.”

Dad said “No! You will BE KILL BY DEMONS”

There was a time when he believed him. Then as he got oldered he stopped. But now in the space station base of the UAC he knew there were demons.

“This is Joson” the radio crackered. “You must fight the demons!”

So John gotted his palsma rifle and blew up the wall.

“HE GOING TO KILL US” said the demons

“I will shoot at him” said the cyberdemon and he fired the rocket missiles. John plasmaed at him and tried to blew him up. But then the ceiling fell and they were trapped and not able to kill.

“No! I must kill the demons” he shouted

The radio said “No, John. You are the demons”

And then John was a zombie.

super macho dude
Aug 9, 2014


Big Chief Funk em' Dunk em' stood at the free throw line, surrounded by the remaining Nephilim Ant-men defensive guard. Their mandibles chittered and dripped a toxic foamy loam, while their eagerness to rip apart Big Chief Funk em' Dunk em' instantly if he missed this most crucial of free throws could be felt by the entire crowd. This was it. The shot to end all shots, to decide the fate of the race of Man, as was his destiny foretold to him so many moons ago on that dusty reservation in Oklahoma by his great grandfather Big Chief Take em' To Hoops.

Funk em' Dunk em' whispered a prayer, closed his eyes, and summoned his spirit animal to guide his hand. With the indomitable power of the mighty North American Bushtit surging through him, he jumped and shot the ball...

I am Toni Lippi
Aug 16, 2004


A nigga fart in he own mouth...

Uncle at Nintendo
Dec 31, 2000



The original poster of this thread is

enzeen
Sep 23, 2010


I grew up in a cabin along an old dirt road in rural Ontario. We didn't have much there, but we didn't need much either. Summers were hard, full of work and sun and sweat. Winters were harder.

The January day we lost ma was

you irl
Jan 22, 2014


it was a dark and stormy

Heartbroken 2Twice
Oct 6, 2013


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvp5BVn7J9M

concerned mom
Apr 22, 2003


For sale: Baby shoes,

SirEvelynTremble
Dec 25, 2013

UNDEAD RACIAL CLEANSING

jimmy was jerking off for the seventeenth time today. he gripped his shaft tightly and pumped and pumped and pumped. his arm was just about to give out when finally

Splatmaster
Aug 1, 2007



Quivering with anticipation and some small amount of trepidation, he selected the setting on the device to "one gallon" as he inserted his erect penis into the automatic milking machine's suction orifice. He hesitated for only a moment, and quickly pressed the button marked "on" and waited as the machine came to life...

scalded schlong
Sep 20, 2003



Hagborn
Mar 30, 2004
Ich esse Scheiße


*digs fingers into chair arms*

gorki
Aug 9, 2014


a few weeks ago i was walking out of the library and i caught a few words of the conversation being had by two guys who walked past me: "first time i made a guy prolapse"...

still thinkin about it

I am Toni Lippi
Aug 16, 2004


gorki posted:

a few weeks ago i was walking out of the library and i caught a few words of the conversation being had by two guys who walked past me: "first time i made a guy prolapse"...

still thinkin about it

Here I am in my room. Thinking of blood. Thinking of love. And I've got an erection.

TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

NO PAPER LEFT


Unfinished cliff hanger sentences,

Gay Roads
Nov 23, 2013

Why hello!

gently caress me hard in the

Telemarchitect
Oct 1, 2009

TOUCH THE KNOB


Bacontotem
May 27, 2010

If you've got Mystique as your girlfriend the fun you could have in bed - I've just imagined X-Men 3 might open with me in bed with Patrick Stewart.

Waltzing Along
Jun 14, 2008

May your eyes be opened by the wonderful


gas thread ban

Your Dead Gay Son
Jan 1, 2006

I'm Gay


Broenheim
Feb 25, 2014

Don't judge me just because I'm a trans cat

I hosed your mom in the

Gas thread ban

Shugojin
Sep 6, 2007

ONE HUNDRED CUPS OF MOTHERFUCKING EGG NOG


your posting is

Demon of the East
Dec 24, 2012



The pickle was only lightly salted, so she

Maldoror
Oct 5, 2003



Quickscope420dad, on a level 4 yard?The genetic jackhammer?He snatches ur life.Takes it like it aint a thang, nigga. Before that happens? To disrespectville punks, like you? I negotiate a treaty with someone who has a huge dicked gay boi, and we turn ur rear end into his love hole for alot of soups and cigs....then, right before we * you? We catch that poo poo on a phone that was keystered in, and broadcast you, taking cocks in the rear end, from guys in hoods, who look at pictures of females with penises, 2get hard

Whirlwind Jones
Apr 13, 2013



For sale: baby shoes, never

Fog Tripper
Mar 3, 2008


...

Baracula
Dec 30, 2010

One, two, three trillion! Ah hah hah!


not surprised but very mad someone got there so quickly.

Borommakott
Sep 12, 2007


AND BURNED BY UNSCRUPULOUS BUSINESSES MORE TIMES

Japanese Phone Box
Jul 9, 2014

sonics my name speed is my game




gotta go FAST



angry. ANGRY ABOUT

ethanol
Jul 13, 2007

Eleven thousand dead birds
fly towards nothing because
they are dead
and cannot fly

lowtax put down the bottle, empty again, he just needed to find one last drink, before he

PlantRobot
Feb 13, 2010


*BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* THIS IS A BROADCAST OF THE EMERGENCY ALERT SYST-

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010



*cough cough* i'll tell you where i buried the gold. i guess i have no use for it anymore. maybe you'll be able to do something with it. it's in the... in the old.. *cough* i put it in the... pass me my hankerchief if you'd be so kind.... all 20 bars are in the I STUCK THEM IN MY rear end in a top hat YOU FUCKER, AND MY rear end in a top hat IS IN

Ron Paul Hype Man
Jun 18, 2007

It's a revolution
Brothers and sisters
There ain't a fight
And it doesn't mean
A god damn thing


It rubs the lotion on its skin and puts the bottle in...

ghlbtsk
Apr 19, 2005

you appear to have fallen off your log to some extent

I've gathered you all here today to bear witness to my last will and testament and to reveal that all of my millions of dollars, which can be rightfully claimed by the first party to reach them, are buried under the

Billy Everyteen
May 6, 2009


"For twelve years, you have been asking:

ninotoreS
Aug 20, 2009

Thanks for the input, Jeff!


Japanese Phone Box posted:

angry. ANGRY ABOUT

CAT ABORTIONS! I've got my rubber-band ball, stapler, and blow-torch ready. First thing I'm gonna do,

ninotoreS fucked around with this message at Aug 17, 2014 around 03:16

Fallows
Jan 20, 2005
not racist

All goons are...

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Rapman the Cook
Aug 24, 2013

waste of space

Suddenly my rear end fell open and a wasp came out and stung my brothers

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