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HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?



Look at the collar. Are those scales? I wondered where the Snakemen had gone...

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Bloodly
Nov 3, 2008

Not as strong as you'd expect.

HerpicleOmnicron5 posted:

Look at the collar. Are those scales? I wondered where the Snakemen had gone...

Yes and no. The Snakemen were effectively Cobras, these are Vipers. The research for them even is called 'Viperus'.

HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?


Bloodly posted:

Yes and no. The Snakemen were effectively Cobras, these are Vipers. The research for them even is called 'Viperus'.

Still snakes. :colbert:

GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

Speedball posted:

Yeah, I have both special mission packs activated, but somehow I got Van Doorn instead. Too bad, Friends in Low Places would have given me 2 engineers, 2 scientists and more money, AND a sergeant.

Huh, so I guess we might be seeing one of my favorite XCOM characters after all (the one you get after Slingshot)... Can't wait to see your take on him.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

I kind of overspent this first month, too...drat. I was hoping to show off both types of new soldiers soon but I may need to hold off a tad while I get more essential stuff like the Officer Training Program and Alien Containment built. And attempt to get a satellite uplink and three satellites built by end of next month.

Gonna be really tight.

IMJack
Apr 16, 2003

Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.


Fun Shoe

HerpicleOmnicron5 posted:

Look at the collar. Are those scales? I wondered where the Snakemen had gone...

Yeah, Thin Men are Snakeman + Men in Black + Reptillians + Slenderman by design.

Sylphosaurus
Sep 6, 2007

IMJack posted:

Yeah, Thin Men are Snakeman + Men in Black + Reptillians + Slenderman by design.
I'm still so drat disappointed that the Thin Men never got an upgraded unit later on in the game. I'd love to see the goofy old snakeman getting updated.

FoolyCharged
Oct 11, 2012

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

Sylphosaurus posted:

I'm still so drat disappointed that the Thin Men never got an upgraded unit later on in the game. I'd love to see the goofy old snakeman getting updated.

It's really sad, because they go from terrifying monstrosities to complete non issues and no other alien really fits their role late game. Theres another unit that kind of does the "high mobility, high accuracy, glass(ish) cannon, and support role" but not really in the same way thin men do.

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Speedball posted:

I kind of overspent this first month, too...drat. I was hoping to show off both types of new soldiers soon but I may need to hold off a tad while I get more essential stuff like the Officer Training Program and Alien Containment built. And attempt to get a satellite uplink and three satellites built by end of next month.

Gonna be really tight.

That sounds like a typical XCOM game. Money is always tight.

Boogle
Sep 1, 2004

Nap Ghost

FoolyCharged posted:

It's really sad, because they go from terrifying monstrosities to complete non issues and no other alien really fits their role late game. Theres another unit that kind of does the "high mobility, high accuracy, glass(ish) cannon, and support role" but not really in the same way thin men do.

More health, more dapper suit, plasma sniper rifles. Maybe tone-down the burst damage for their version of the plasma sniper.

FoolyCharged
Oct 11, 2012

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

Boogle posted:

More health, more dapper suit, plasma sniper rifles. Maybe tone-down the burst damage for their version of the plasma sniper.

I'm not saying they couldn't make one, I'm saying that there's no end game unit that can do what they do. A more dapper suit would truly be the fiercest of upgrades though.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
Shame you can't rebuild that poor heavy. You can make her faster. Stronger. With less rocket.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Glazius posted:

Shame you can't rebuild that poor heavy. You can make her faster. Stronger. With less rocket.

Yes, quite a shame. Someone else will have to fit the bill. Muahahahahahaha.

RickVoid
Oct 21, 2010

FoolyCharged posted:

I'm not saying they couldn't make one, I'm saying that there's no end game unit that can do what they do. A more dapper suit would truly be the fiercest of upgrades though.

Tactical Bowler hats and Umbrella Plasma Rifles.

Section Z
Oct 1, 2008

Wait, this is the Moon.
How did I even get here?

Pillbug

RickVoid posted:

Tactical Bowler hats and Umbrella Plasma Rifles.
I think that is their distant relative the Penguin Men.

Feinne
Oct 9, 2007

When you fall, get right back up again.
The real problem is that there's not really a niche for an upgraded Thin Man in the late game. I mean right now they're those rear end in a top hat things that can poison you and are both much better at shooting and much better armed than a Sectoid. But I just don't see any way a Thin Man with a better weapon and statline is anything more than a reskin of aliens that currently exist.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Part 5: Sergeant-Class and Lower Orientation:

Greetings, recruits. By now you should be aware of the fact that aliens are real and are slowly but surely invading our planet. What you do not know is this is not the first time.



The original incarnation of XCOM was a repurposed Cold War bureau of the United States government, intended to mount a resistance against Soviet invaders in case they nuked America and won. This was back when everyone thought stuff like Red Dawn was an inevitability and the human race was wasting an enormous amount of resources on history’s biggest pissing match.



The Soviet invasion never occurred, but instead, the world was paralyzed by the incursion of a different form of invader: aliens we code-named Outsiders. Their real name was “Zudjari” but that doesn’t matter now. The short version is: we won, but the original XCOM was destroyed in the process. Only a handful of people survived, including me. And no, I’m not telling you which one I was.



The Zudjari used an artificial virus —really more like a nanomachine— and infected 95% of the earth’s population with it. It was designed to slowly take over people’s minds, with the final stage turning them into drooling mindless zombies called “Sleepwalkers.” Defeating the Zudjari destroyed their mind control network and cured the disease, leaving almost everyone with memory loss. Today, the outbreak is thought of as a biological weapon that went awry, with both the East and West agreeing on a total ban of all bioweapon use in the future.



If you’re wondering why there’s no physical evidence of previous alien invasions, it’s because when we kicked their asses off our planet, we got rid of all their junk. This was vital. The image you are seeing here is not an alien city. It is a tower that was constructed within a single day on Earth. But all that metal had to come from somewhere.

Zudjari technology drains the resources around it in minutes to accomplish its tasks. Because of this, their home world was completely unsustainable, an industrial wasteland. That’s one of the reasons they were invading. And we Earthlings already have a problem grappling with the concept of “resource conservation.” We would have killed ourselves in five years if we had retained access to this.

Of course, this was also the Cold War, and nobody wanted to look weak during the Cold War, so the liars running our nations decided it would be best for the public to pretend aliens never invaded in the first place. However, we haven’t been completely sticking our heads in the sand since that day. One leftover technology we retained is the device that lets our satellite detect UFOs.



Modern XCOM does not answer to the United States government. It answers to a council of member nations that fund it, but even they are not where XCOM ends. We have staff and soldiers from all nations in our employ. We do not care if you are male, female, or undecided. We do not care if you’re black, white, brown, or minty green. The stakes are too high here for the petty squabbles of nations. Before you leave today, you will swear an oath that the good of the planet comes before your personal, familial, or even national needs. Our world is a tiny island in a vast ocean, and it’s time to grow the hell up.

One final note about fraternization: go for it. Everybody here is from somewhere different on the planet. Morale is important to me, you’re not allowed off the base, and you might learn to care about someone who’s not from your own neighborhood. So I’m all for it. Just use protection and it’s all good.

Yesss!
Hmph. I’m gonna go play cards with Zinchenko.
I don’t even have a social life. Guess that needs to change.



Ah, I see from the pink hair that you’ve been exposed to the Meld already, Sergeant. Looks like that’s how General Van Doorn knew of it. But, uh…why the pink armor?



The blue one gave it to me, she said it would go with my hair. …and I don’t think she was kidding, either…
And “Princess?”
A nepotism joke that got way outta hand when the pink hair struck. Sir, I have a really bad feeling about integrating with this…group. They’re not just undisciplined, they’re weird.
Right. I have something I want you to see, Sergeant.



You’re telling me we should risk the lives of our troops so we can bring one of these things in…alive?
Yes. Without a live specimen, we’ve reached the limits of what we can learn. From my studies, their nervous system is quite similar to ours. A large electrical shock delivered at close range will—
Close range?! And what happens when it doesn’t work? Do you think it’s worth the risk?


I do. We do not know our enemy. How can we hope to stop something we don’t understand? If we can capture one of these creatures alive, we may be able to communicate with it.
And…interrogate it…find out where they’re operating from…
Yes. That possibility outweighs all risks, in my opinion. Though I’m not sure how we could communicate, they don’t even have mouths…
Leave that to me! You just work on a place to store them.



Uh…
Central Officer Bradford is actually quite intelligent, but he’s the end result of 5,000 years of military history refining the ultimate soldier. He’s overspecialized. If we suggested interrogating a human enemy, he wouldn’t have to be walked through it like a child. But now he’s dealing with something he doesn’t really consider people, so it never occurs to him that communication is a possibility.
I see…
If humans were the only enemy Bradford had to deal with, he’d be unstoppable. But we are dealing with things outside the earth, so we need people who think outside the box, literally. People whose capacity for original thought hasn’t been drilled out of them by instructors more interested in obedience than creativity. That’s why the soldiers you’ve met so far have been “eccentric.” Earth will not be saved by people who conform. It’ll be saved by the weirdos.
Well, when you put it like that, sir… Sergeant “Princess” reporting for duty! Heh.




What are your specialties?
I’m trained to coordinate with spotters, like all good snipers, and when it comes to close-range combat I’m deadly with a sidearm. My father’s idea of a gift for a 13-year-old girl is to give her a nine millimeter.
Yeah, that sounds like him. He’s being brought on board, too. Nobody ever really leaves XCOM once they’re aware of it. He’ll be in charge of our officer training school.



Not much to do but wait until our projects are finished…or the aliens attack again…

Speedball fucked around with this message at 07:20 on Sep 8, 2014

Seraphic Neoman
Jul 19, 2011


What's the prostrat for Steam squares in your base? I usually try to put my power generators around those, but that can take time.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

There's one steam square I'm excavating in the left-most column, second row down. That's why I have a power generator right next to it and on top of it.

venom3053000
Dec 29, 2013
that guy needs to learn about Murphy

TooMuchAbstraction
Oct 14, 2012

I spent four years making
Waves of Steel
Hell yes I'm going to turn my avatar into an ad for it.
Fun Shoe

SSNeoman posted:

What's the prostrat for Steam squares in your base? I usually try to put my power generators around those, but that can take time.

Realistically, your first serious power expansion is going to come from a steam power station; non-steam basic power is horrible and the upgraded power station won't be available for far too long.

And yeah, taking advantage of the pairing bonuses for building placement makes a big difference in terms of efficiency. But you're at the mercy of where the game decides to put steam and what you can afford to excavate. The early game at least does an excellent job of feeling badly resource-constrained.

Bruceski
Aug 21, 2007

The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

TooMuchAbstraction posted:

And yeah, taking advantage of the pairing bonuses for building placement makes a big difference in terms of efficiency. But you're at the mercy of where the game decides to put steam and what you can afford to excavate. The early game at least does an excellent job of feeling badly resource-constrained.
The main one to plan long-term for is satellites since they have a clear end goal (one for every country, 16) and pairing things up in a square gets you four bonus ones. Other than that they're definitely useful, but you really need to build where you can.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Just to keep my budget intact, what I'm probably going to have to resort to is a janky-rear end system of putting a second power generator in the top row, second from left, to connect to the two others, build the thermal generator later, then demolish the two power generators in the second column as I see fit to make a square of Satellite Uplinks while building power elsewhere.

I'm leaving a gap to the right of the Gene Lab so I can build a regular research laboratory there, so it'll have a stacking bonus with the gene lab, giving me +30% research speed. The gap to the right and bottom of the Cyborg Factory will be for engineering workshops and a Foundry.

Assuming I get enough funds to get everything I want when I want it...fingers crossed.

How many countries do you think I'll lose before the end, guys? Heh heh.

Chard
Aug 24, 2010




You're lucky to have steam in the second row, as well as so many hollow tiles. Lacking either one won't prevent you from winning but they sure do help if you have them.

e: zero countries. I believe in Bradford's sweater XCOM.

Bloodly
Nov 3, 2008

Not as strong as you'd expect.
...At least one, probably two. I forget what difficulty you're playing on. I imagine a high-tier player is looking at this and saying 'none at all'.

Seraphic Neoman
Jul 19, 2011


Depends on the difficulty, but I believe in you so I'm in the "none" camp too. We're honestly in good shape here. I mean this is going about as well as early game can go.

Watch how someone points out what a dumbass I am.

Bruceski
Aug 21, 2007

The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

I tend to play very aggressive with satellites (satellites = money = more satellites and panic low across the board) so losing none is certainly a possibility, but if you play a bit less no-fun-peak-optimum it can be easy for a country or two to get away from you. I'm going to guess "two countries with high panic on different continents when abductions pop, new satellites won't be done until the day after the council" Sophie's choice loss of one country.

GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

Gonna go for you losing at most three countries. Everyone always has different priorities, and it can be very easy to let a country or two get away from you if you focus too much on other things and you lose track.

Feinne
Oct 9, 2007

When you fall, get right back up again.
It does help that you got a relatively easy Council Mission instead of That Mission, which means by the time you DO get That Mission it'll be a lot less threatening.

IMJack
Apr 16, 2003

Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.


Fun Shoe
For the sake of the narrative, I'm betting you let one or two countries get away from you. A good story needs setbacks and the threat of failure.

Tomn
Aug 23, 2007

And the angel said unto him
"Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."
But lo he could not. For the angel was hitting him with his own hands
Pretty neat how you came up with a narrative way to explain why Bradford was being so thick-headed in that cutscene. That was really one of his absolute derpiest moments - including the tutorial mission.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Bloodly posted:

I forget what difficulty you're playing on.

Classic.

I could probably swing this with no losses if I always priortize panic reduction over getting continental bonuses in a timely fashion but I really, REALLY want to get South America as soon as it is feasible to do so. Love having instant interrogations and narratively speaking I have a very, VERY good reason for that. Muahahahahha.

Tomn posted:

Pretty neat how you came up with a narrative way to explain why Bradford was being so thick-headed in that cutscene. That was really one of his absolute derpiest moments - including the tutorial mission.

Heh, thanks. It's fanwank but I try to make it at least GOOD fanwank.

Speedball fucked around with this message at 21:40 on Sep 1, 2014

Omobono
Feb 19, 2013

That's it! No more hiding in tomato crates! It's time to show that idiota Germany how a real nation fights!

For pasta~! CHARGE!

Speedball posted:




What are your specialties?
I’m trained to coordinate with spotters, like all good snipers
:cawg:
Would you believe that there's still people insisting Snap Shot is a competitive alternative to squadsight?
Don't get me wrong, Snap Shot would be a good ability in a vacuum, but squadsight is so goddamn broken that an ability with an opportunity cost of "no squadsight" is lovely by default.


I wonder who our commander is? On one hand, that's Carter's hat in his icon; on the other, it may be too obvious.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Well, what if there was a sniper that didn't even need a rifle? He'd take Snap Shot.

Saaaayyyy....

TooMuchAbstraction
Oct 14, 2012

I spent four years making
Waves of Steel
Hell yes I'm going to turn my avatar into an ad for it.
Fun Shoe

Omobono posted:

:cawg:
Would you believe that there's still people insisting Snap Shot is a competitive alternative to squadsight?
Don't get me wrong, Snap Shot would be a good ability in a vacuum, but squadsight is so goddamn broken that an ability with an opportunity cost of "no squadsight" is lovely by default.

My first time through the game, my standard approach was to park my snipers behind some cover with good sight angles, slowly progress forward with my other forces, and snipe out all aliens that the vanguard flushed out. It worked fantastically.

My second (as-yet unfinished) attempt was with the option that randomizes perks, so I had to try to use snipers without squadsight or snapshot, and it is a pain in the rear end. You run them up to the enemy so it's in range of the rifle, then you can't use the rifle because you moved that turn, so you end up uselessly plinking with your pistol. Next turn the alien moves and you can't shoot them anyway!

Who the hell designs a sniper rifle with a max range of maybe 30 meters anyway?

Omobono
Feb 19, 2013

That's it! No more hiding in tomato crates! It's time to show that idiota Germany how a real nation fights!

For pasta~! CHARGE!

TooMuchAbstraction posted:

My first time through the game, my standard approach was to park my snipers behind some cover with good sight angles, slowly progress forward with my other forces, and snipe out all aliens that the vanguard flushed out. It worked fantastically.

My second (as-yet unfinished) attempt was with the option that randomizes perks, so I had to try to use snipers without squadsight or snapshot, and it is a pain in the rear end. You run them up to the enemy so it's in range of the rifle, then you can't use the rifle because you moved that turn, so you end up uselessly plinking with your pistol. Next turn the alien moves and you can't shoot them anyway!

Who the hell designs a sniper rifle with a max range of maybe 30 meters anyway?

Oh, yeah, Snap shot is bad only because it's exclusive with squadsight. Play with random abilities and suddenly that little drawback goes away.

Let's think about it another way: both are powerful abilities that allow snipers to function hassle-free, Squadsight allows them to break the game in addition to that.

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Speedball posted:

Well, what if there was a sniper that didn't even need a rifle? He'd take Snap Shot.

Saaaayyyy....

Or a sniper that didn't have their sniper rifle with them for some reason.

Feinne
Oct 9, 2007

When you fall, get right back up again.

Torrannor posted:

Or a sniper that didn't have their sniper rifle with them for some reason.

Say, for example, that both their arms and legs were cut off for being terrible at shooting guns.

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Feinne posted:

Say, for example, that both their arms and legs were cut off for being terrible at shooting guns.

It's a just punishment for wanting to be a sniper and being unable to hit the broad side of a barn.

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Hobo Siege
Apr 24, 2008

by Cowcaster
There are two ways to play this game, really - By refusing to give up an inch of ground and prioritizing coverage for the most desperate nations or by letting the world go to poo poo while you dig in with a lucrative funding base. I like having a little room to breathe toward the end so I usually go for the former.

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