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Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

I'm pretty sure that you guys exist, but I'm positive that I don't

What's it like to exist

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TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW

Smoking Crow posted:

I'm pretty sure that you guys exist, but I'm positive that I don't

What's it like to exist

pretty awesome

iSheep
Feb 5, 2006

by R. Guyovich
i have the exact opposite of this problem.

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

I'm pretty sure that you guys exist, but I'm positive that I don't

What's it like to exist

You get mail, and a newspaper, make a brew of coffee in the morning, and feed the cat. You leave your house in world made of terrorism and fear, everyone is out to get you, and work is an excuse to get by this.

You come home and want to relax but telemarketers and ex girlfriends call you, sometimes drunk, sometimes not.

You turn on the TV to discover there is nothing on, you try to read a book but you can't, because you are in constant pain.

you wake up....

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

TOILETLORD posted:

pretty awesome

What's the best part about existing

Is it knowing that the food you eat actually does something

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

What's the best part about existing

Is it knowing that the food you eat actually does something

Only thing you need to know is that a can of madarin oranges has 315% of vitamin C, without it, you'll die.

TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW

Smoking Crow posted:

What's the best part about existing

Is it knowing that the food you eat actually does something

the best part about food is pooping it out, as a daily ritual.

FuriousGeorge
Jan 23, 2006

Ah, the simple joys of a monkey knife-fight.
Grimey Drawer
It would be pretty great if it weren't for than darn Obama.

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

TOILETLORD posted:

the best part about food is pooping it out, as a daily ritual.

What about walking? Is walking nice?

Jimbone Tallshanks
Dec 16, 2005

You can't pull rank on murder.

Smoking Crow posted:

What about walking? Is walking nice?

Not as good as swimming

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

What about walking? Is walking nice?

Someday in the future, metal and spinal columns will become one, and paralysis will be a thing of the past. Stem cell research is a cluster gently caress though.

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

ColdReaches posted:

Someday in the future, metal and spinal columns will become one, and paralysis will be a thing of the past. Stem cell research is a cluster gently caress though.

But is that really a good thing? Would losing a part of your humanity be worth it to be considered normal?

Speaking of which, what's it like to be a normal person who exists? Is it cool to know that most people are exactly like you?

Deadbeat Poetry
Mar 6, 2004

Sorry if my costume scared you

Smoking Crow posted:

But is that really a good thing? Would losing a part of your humanity be worth it to be considered normal?


I've already lost the mental and emotional parts of my humanity, so having a bunch of metal parts would be the next logical step.

Illavick
Sep 15, 2012

WHENA MINA RENA VATIVE

Smoking Crow posted:


What's it like to exist

nauseating

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

But is that really a good thing? Would losing a part of your humanity be worth it to be considered normal?

Speaking of which, what's it like to be a normal person who exists? Is it cool to know that most people are exactly like you?

No such as normal, you have a script of some kind in your cabinet, or you're an alcholic/drug user. Life is made to exist, not the other way around.

Acres of Quakers
May 6, 2006

ColdReaches posted:

You get mail, and a newspaper, make a brew of coffee in the morning, and feed the cat. You leave your house in world made of terrorism and fear, everyone is out to get you, and work is an excuse to get by this.

You come home and want to relax but telemarketers and ex girlfriends call you, sometimes drunk, sometimes not.

You turn on the TV to discover there is nothing on, you try to read a book but you can't, because you are in constant pain.

you wake up....

You wake up as light fills the window wells of your parent's basement. It's late, but you've got nothing to today so who cares? You sit up, stand, and shuffle up the stairs to empty your bladder. The house is quiet as everyone has gone to work. Thank God for small favors.

As you sit and pee you think about showering, and quickly dismiss the thought. Who do you have to impress, anyway? The same goes for brushing your teeth.

On the way back down to your sanctuary you stop by the fridge to grab a soda and a hunk of white American cheese, sliced. It'll go well with the leftover bag of fritos next to your computer.

Back in the familiar dimness of your battle station, you sit in your chair, awaken your pc from its hibernation, and double click the icon. World of Warcraft begins patching.

For a moment you admire your character. Her sexy curves, the top tier gear, her almond eyes. You Enter World and begin to

Exist.

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

ColdReaches posted:

No such as normal, you have a script of some kind in your cabinet, or you're an alcholic/drug user. Life is made to exist, not the other way around.

Wouldn't that make the not normal people normal by statistics?

What is it like knowing that the pop music on the radio applies to you?

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

Wouldn't that make the not normal people normal by statistics?

What is it like knowing that the pop music on the radio applies to you?

All music is the same, from beethoven to what ever is the craze now, still though a woman singing a song is the best instrument, you singed him to sleep.

I stay alone becasuse I know in my heart I am a bad person with all the trimmings. I get flack from my family and friends about it, some think i'm gay or something, no, i'm truly a broken person, and i won't subject another person to that, even if you think i have pretty eyes, and muscles.

I'm alive because i choose to remain alive, and after those 2 pass, the contract ends/

Catgirl Al Capone
Dec 15, 2007

speaking as the perfect being, its ok

Maoist Pussy
Feb 12, 2014

by Lowtax

Smoking Crow posted:

But is that really a good thing? Would losing a part of your humanity be worth it to be considered normal?

Speaking of which, what's it like to be a normal person who exists? Is it cool to know that most people are exactly like you?

Actually, when you are a kid you assume most people are like you, but then somewhere in your mid-20s everyone shoots off in different directions and everyone's goals and interests become so divergent that it becomes a thing when you can find someone who gets you.

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

ColdReaches posted:

All music is the same, from beethoven to what ever is the craze now, still though a woman singing a song is the best instrument, you singed him to sleep.

I stay alone becasuse I know in my heart I am a bad person with all the trimmings. I get flack from my family and friends about it, some think i'm gay or something, no, i'm truly a broken person, and i won't subject another person to that, even if you think i have pretty eyes, and muscles.

I'm alive because i choose to remain alive, and after those 2 pass, the contract ends/

give this man thorazine.

My own therapist withdrew because i torn him apart.

i'm scheduled to meet another one in 3 days

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

ColdReaches posted:

All music is the same, from beethoven to what ever is the craze now, still though a woman singing a song is the best instrument, you singed him to sleep.

My "dad" sang me to sleep because my mom couldn't be bothered to care for me as a baby.

Ignatius M. Meen
May 26, 2011

Hello yes I heard there was a lovely trainwreck here and...

that depends on a lot of factors. like, if you're a rich white male it's pretty great, but if you're a fly inside a house you won't even have the brainpower to realize how terrible and frightening your short existence is bound to be due to all the things that can/want to kill you (the humans, the house spiders, stuff humans leave out that look pretty but are super dangerous for you).

you should be glad you don't exist, i materialized and became a dung beetle. don't ask me how i'm posting, i'm too busy rolling up poo poo to guess

Dr. Witherbone
Nov 1, 2010

CHEESE LOOKS ON IN
DESPAIR BUT ALSO WITH
AN ERECTION
You should post in the ghost thread to find out what ghost you are. I think ghosts don't exist, so I'm pretty sure it applies.

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

My "dad" sang me to sleep because my mom couldn't be bothered to care for me as a baby.

i dont need to know the gender how this plays out.

my last moms boyfriend tried that poo poo with me, and i broke 12 of his teeth,

you could hear the pulp sound.

it was on video, and the florida cops refused to prosecute.

the blue wall went up and a settlement was reached.

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.
florida cops are pussies

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.
i don't want to anymore, i'm tired

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.
if you want to tell me things are better and stuff, yeah right, youre paid to say that

Chris Awful
Oct 2, 2005

Tell your friends they don't have to be scared or hungry anymore comrades.
reality is simulation

there exist only a singularity from which reality emerges.

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Chris Awful posted:

reality is simulation

there exist only a singularity from which reality emerges.


PR spin should be taught in kindergarten.

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

ColdReaches posted:

if you want to tell me things are better and stuff, yeah right, youre paid to say that

You were ok itt until you went turbo fag

Chris Awful
Oct 2, 2005

Tell your friends they don't have to be scared or hungry anymore comrades.

ColdReaches posted:

PR spin should be taught in kindergarten.

Mommy, I did not steal a cookie from the cookie jar. I borrowed it.

ColdReaches
Oct 12, 2013

Place : Detroit
Date : 4031 A.D.

Smoking Crow posted:

You were ok itt until you went turbo fag

everyone has a high dollar to sell out, sometimes it's forced.

ilikedirt
Oct 15, 2004

king of posting
ur all a bunch of dummys nothing is ereal. this is all matrix u f*cking e-sheeple

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012
LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL
I thought this thread was the key to finding out my life has been a lie and I was hopeful for the sweet release of my pain. Unfortunately the hope I felt when I opened this thread was misplaced.

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

a lie

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry
The universe is a joke so just drink and eat and gently caress and make enough money to invest in real estate and retire young so you can do all of those without needing to work.

Work is the worst part of existing even if you love your job.

pwnyXpress
Mar 28, 2007

Smoking Crow posted:

I'm pretty sure that you guys exist, but I'm positive that I don't

What's it like to exist

it really makes u think

because you know, i think therefore i am

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!
Tell me where the philosopher's stone is.

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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
The best part of existing is the distortion I produce in spacetime, causing other objects with measurable mass to be drawn in my direction ever so slightly.

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