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but cause you are taking a huge poo poo and need more fiber in your diet or like you sit down and just comes out a big liquidity mess and everyone can hear how explosive your rear end is
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Sep 6, 2014 17:55
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Sep 6, 2014 17:56
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Scientists say going number two in public restrooms is always a horrifying experience news at 12.
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Sep 6, 2014 17:59
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Some guy at my office seriously needs to see several doctors about the fact that he sprays the full contents of a bloodmobile out his rear end all over the drat place and then doesn't flush like weekly this happens
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Sep 6, 2014 17:59
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Sep 6, 2014 18:01
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sorry you have faucet rear end, op
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Sep 6, 2014 18:01
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This is the thread we have all been waiting for thanks OP
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Sep 6, 2014 18:01
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public restrooms bring out some of the worst in humanity
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Sep 6, 2014 18:02
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potee posted:Some guy at my office seriously needs to see several doctors about the fact that he sprays the full contents of a bloodmobile out his rear end all over the drat place and then doesn't flush Well, you only see it maybe once a week. It's probably happening more regularly than you are personally experiencing
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Sep 6, 2014 18:03
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potee posted:Some guy at my office seriously needs to see several doctors about the fact that he sprays the full contents of a bloodmobile out his rear end all over the drat place and then doesn't flush You should seriously leave a note saying "To whomever drops the blood dueces you need to go see a doctor." realpoast.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:06
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or the dude who walks in while on his phone having a really intense argument, except you don't actually know that since hes speaking in rapid fire spanish so it could be just a normal convo and pauses a little everytime your bowel movements are loud enough to echo and you know the other person heard.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:13
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does anyone else do the obligatory foot shuffle noise or a little cough when you are pooping and someone else comes into the bathroom? you know, to let them know you're in there.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:14
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Nelson Mandingo posted:Scientists say going number two in public restrooms is always a horrifying experience news at 12. the key is to find the family restroom or whatever, its a single unisex bathroom with a clean toilet and a locking door, hidden around the corner
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Sep 6, 2014 18:16
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gggiiimmmppp posted:the key is to find the family restroom or whatever, its a single unisex bathroom with a clean toilet and a locking door, hidden around the corner your only allowed to use that to poop with family. had to learn that one the hard way
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Sep 6, 2014 18:19
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I have crippling stage fright in public toilets that seems can only be cured by a few tinctures of whiskey. Once I've got that warmth in my belly I am overcome with a sense of pride and think in my head "listen to my magnificent bowel movements, fuckos." I also want to face punch all those cunts who think striking up conversation at a urinal is a totally non-defective person thing to do.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:21
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at work when i take a leak at the urinals its always fun when someone rips a low pitched fart right next to you nonchalantly.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:27
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KennyLoggins posted:at work when i take a leak at the urinals its always fun when someone rips a low pitched fart right next to you nonchalantly. this is the best time to fart tbh
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Sep 6, 2014 18:30
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i grunt when using a urinal
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Sep 6, 2014 18:31
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FartRomancer.EXE posted:i grunt when using a urinal Get that checked out.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:33
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FartRomancer.EXE posted:i grunt when using a urinal hosed up if true
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Sep 6, 2014 18:34
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i'm grunting right now
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Sep 6, 2014 18:35
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you walk in just to take a piss and saddle up to the urinal when in the stall next to you, someone starts to giggle cause they are watching the latest episode of pewdiepie, but because they are wearing headphones they don know how loud they are being and making the experience of pissing in public that much more unpleasent for everyone involved
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Sep 6, 2014 18:42
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just sit down on that toilet, no fuckin paper on the seat, let my dick hang into the bowl and spray away all over my balls
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Sep 6, 2014 18:42
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men do it because they think it makes them sound manly. same with spitting in the urinal. (i openly make fun of strangers who do that, and they can't do anything b/c their mid-piss/mid-poo poo.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:43
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that's a good way to get hemmaroids
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Sep 6, 2014 18:45
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Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:men do it because they think it makes them sound manly. same with spitting in the urinal. (i openly make fun of strangers who do that, and they can't do anything b/c their mid-piss/mid-poo poo. mid-poo poo in a urinal? I can't decide if that's some nasty rear end poo poo or just alpha as gently caress.
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Sep 6, 2014 18:47
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When you hear someone grunting on the toilet toss this over the stall meta as gently caress 
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Sep 6, 2014 19:12
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i just whip out my phone and call people. if there's no one to call, just pretend and have loud as gently caress fake phone conversations. nothing says I'm an alpha better than making million dollar deals in the middle of taking a poo poo
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Sep 6, 2014 19:52
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have you ever jerked off and climaxed while taking a poo poo
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Sep 6, 2014 19:56
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only when constipated. a good jo keeps the rear end in a top hat loose
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Sep 6, 2014 20:00
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Trip Daddy X posted:does anyone else do the obligatory foot shuffle noise or a little cough when you are pooping and someone else comes into the bathroom? you know, to let them know you're in there. of course. im not a animal
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Sep 6, 2014 20:03
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Zzulu posted:have you ever jerked off and climaxed while taking a poo poo That's a beta blumpkin.
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Sep 6, 2014 20:05
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i crap my rear end with diarrhea
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Sep 6, 2014 20:05
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lol @ u if you're poop-shy. Yeah those sounds you hear are coming out of my rear end, what of it?
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Sep 6, 2014 20:19
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i can only go in my own bathroom  caused problems when i was in hospital for a few days last year. not good butt times
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Sep 7, 2014 06:33
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I'm not embarrassed about the idea of taking a poo poo in public, just horrified. I mean, I'll still do it in an emergency, but why god why? Public restrooms are the seat of all human depravity and its not like the human digestive system works fast enough that you ever have to take an emergency poo poo. If you need to poo poo more than once a day and are not on an 8000 calorie bodybuilding diet you might want to get that checked out. Needing to piss can sneak up on you hard and fast but at least with that (and if you're a dude) your body doesn't actually have to come into contact with public toilets. With the most minimal planning you can poo poo in the comfort of your own home, or if on a trip at least somewhere halfway decent like a hotel room toilet or out in the middle of the woods.
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Sep 7, 2014 06:50
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Nathilus posted:8000 calorie
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Sep 7, 2014 06:52
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Nathilus posted:I'm not embarrassed about the idea of taking a poo poo in public, just horrified. I mean, I'll still do it in an emergency, but why god why? Public restrooms are the seat of all human depravity and its not like the human digestive system works fast enough that you ever have to take an emergency poo poo. If you need to poo poo more than once a day and are not on an 8000 calorie bodybuilding diet you might want to get that checked out. Needing to piss can sneak up on you hard and fast but at least with that (and if you're a dude) your body doesn't actually have to come into contact with public toilets. Spoken like a man who has never had to take an emergency poo poo
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Sep 7, 2014 06:53
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BLARGHLE posted:Spoken like a man who has never had to take an emergency poo poo I mean, if you get food poisoning or something and your rear end is gonna explode whether you have pants on or not, the normal rules are obviously suspended. If that's a regular occurrence for you, you need to listen to me: GET HELP.
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Sep 7, 2014 06:57
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I don't understand why men act like pooping is some great ordeal, with all the grunting stuff. I've literally never heard anyone grunting in my life in the women's room. Which is not to claim that women are less gross or anything, because women's rooms are some gross poo poo and women will smear their period blood on the wall, but they don't make a big deal about pooping.
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Sep 7, 2014 06:59
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