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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
You wake up in an unfamiliar bed. At least it's unfamiliar at first. As your consciousness returns, you slowly realize that this was your bed 13 years ago. You have reverted to your self as you were on September 8th, 2001, but you've retained all the memories of the past 13 years as well as your personality. Was your life up to this point just a dream? If it was, it should have faded by now, but it doesn't. 2014 is as clear to you as it was yesterday. Friends, events and situations from 2001 are only a distant memory.
What do you do when you realize that three days from now, the twin towers and pentagon are due to be attacked? How do you make people believe you? Do you even try to prevent the attack? Tell everyone you can like a doomsday prophet? Or seek out specific authority figures and try to convince them using knowledge only someone from the future could know?
I hope you have a good memory of your life in 2001.
Goons younger than 13 are exempt because you weren't born yet.

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Abisteen
Sep 30, 2005

Oh my God what the fuck am I?
go poop

AntifaSupersoldier
Jul 30, 2003

Reality is what you can get away with
Hell Gem
i immediately go to the twin towers and covertly disarm the bombs for the controlled demolition

Zero Star
Jan 22, 2006

Robit the paranoid blogger.
Go to the bookie's and put all your money on a terrorist attack happening in NYC on 9/11

Profiteering :getin:

vyst
Aug 25, 2009



i immediately go to the twin towers and covertly rearm the bombs for the good of Israel as i silently proclaim to myself "another successful contract"

a whole buncha crows
May 8, 2003

WHEN WE DON'T KNOW WHO TO HATE, WE HATE OURSELVES.-SA USER NATION (AKA ME!)
patiently wait and be the first to post 9/11 jokes on the day

a whole buncha crows
May 8, 2003

WHEN WE DON'T KNOW WHO TO HATE, WE HATE OURSELVES.-SA USER NATION (AKA ME!)
recreate all the best 9/11 photoshops and rise quickly to forum superstar

wearing a lampshade
Mar 6, 2013

if you're 13 but have the mind of a 25 year old does that mean banging people your own age is statutory rape?

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.


Grimey Drawer
I wouldn't tell anyone about 9/11 because I'd be too busy freaking out.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

albany academy posted:

if you're 13 but have the mind of a 25 year old does that mean banging people your own age is statutory rape?

Anime is divided on the issue.

Kleen_TheRacistDog
Feb 17, 2014

Can't bust the Krust fuckman
www.skullmund.com
knowing what i know now about how my life plays out over the next 13 years, i would just kill myself.

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry
Invest in Google and Netflix and Youtube and whatever will make me a big profit.
Who cares about the twin towers, preventing it might affect my investments.

Torka
Jan 5, 2008

say nothing about 911 to anyone, get megarich shorting mortgage backed securities/CDOs in the runup to 2008

Libelous Slander
May 1, 2009

... you're just creepy ...

Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

knowing what i know now about how my life plays out over the next 13 years, i would just kill myself.

same



for real though if i had to complete the last 3 years of highschool and then all of college again at first i said "gently caress that" but upon another few seconds of thought i realized that i would do a ton different so basically, i will accept this task, please make this happen for me.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

knowing what i know now about how my life plays out over the next 13 years, i would just kill myself.

Why not just take the opportunity to correct your mistakes? Even if you tried, you couldn't recreate your life as it was.
Hope you didn't have any kids because even if you could find/romance your future partner over again, the odds of you having the same kids are billions to one.

Hieronymous Alloy
Jan 30, 2009


Why! Why!! Why must you refuse to accept that Dr. Hieronymous Alloy's Genetically Enhanced Cream Corn Is Superior to the Leading Brand on the Market!?!




Morbid Hound
Call in a bunch of warnings about the twin towers to all local new york emergency services. After the towers are hit, become an extraordinary rendition victim and die of torture in a CIA "black site" when they refuse to believe my "time traveller" story.

I am Toni Lippi
Aug 16, 2004
"Hello, China? I'd like to buy your American flags...how many? ALL OF THEM!"

drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib
Go to new york and visit the WTC on the 10th.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Hieronymous Alloy posted:

Call in a bunch of warnings about the twin towers to all local new york emergency services. After the towers are hit, become an extraordinary rendition victim and die of torture in a CIA "black site" when they refuse to believe my "time traveller" story.

Yeah this is pretty much how I envisioned things turning out for me.

Rad Tad
Jul 2, 2014

i never forget

drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib

Pochoclo posted:

Invest in Google and Netflix and Youtube and whatever will make me a big profit.
Who cares about the twin towers, preventing it might affect my investments.

If you invest in Lockheed Martin and say, Blackwater, you might care.

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm

Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

knowing what i know now about how my life plays out over the next 13 years, i would just kill myself.

same

Digital Fingers
Sep 2, 2012

Write down a detailed outline of the attacks along with the next ten years of history then send all the info to a news crew before you tape a bunch of firecrackers and american flags to yourself and jump off the top of one of the towers.

you'll look super crazy then BOOM the attacks happen and within a year TLC has a series where they sort through your old notebooks from school looking for more predictions. Future you will be living sweet off those royalty checks and getting mad puss from syndication of your story.

Its what we in the time travel bizz call "the long con"

u fink u hard Percy
Sep 14, 2007

albany academy posted:

if you're 13 but have the mind of a 25 year old does that mean banging people your own age is statutory rape?

God I hope not.

reignofevil
Nov 7, 2008
Good news everyone! With my advanced knowledge (some arab guys I never learned the names of are a major threat to the country! One of them has a single engine craft license; that really oughta narrow it down for you!) I can definitely make sure we oppress people and launch our violent wars.

Bad news everyone! I am eight. Moments after telling my entire family this I will be informed to "go watch Dragonball Z".

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien
yep place a ridiculous bet on 9/11 and then establish a lucrative career reading the future, but surround it with neo-pagan shamanist mumbo jumbo to make it look like you're full of poo poo so that mulder and scully don't scoop you up

Horniest Manticore
Nov 23, 2013

Hello, you!
Lipstick Apathy
simple just send a tweet to all my followeOH poo poo WHAT IS THIS WORLD

1gnoirents
Jun 28, 2014

hello :)
dude, join an investment firm, get hella rich.

I mean google, apple, and eventually facebook is all you need to know

I wonder if attempting to warn about 9/11 would change the outcome of these companies though. theres a moral dilema for you

plus id get laid SO MUCH MORE , september 8th was like the first day of freshman year fo rme

Deki
May 12, 2008

It's Hammer Time!
I'd go to my sweet-rear end Birthday party on the 9th? Afterwards, probably fake a religious epiphany in class and shout out a prophecy about 9/11 and become a prophet or some poo poo.

the holy poopacy
May 16, 2009

hey! check this out
Fun Shoe

Applewhite posted:

What do you do when you realize that three days from now, the twin towers and pentagon are due to be attacked?

Exactly the same thing I did the first time I woke up on 9/8/01, start masturbating.

1gnoirents
Jun 28, 2014

hello :)

Deki posted:

I'd go to my sweet-rear end Birthday party on the 9th? Afterwards, probably fake a religious epiphany in class and shout out a prophecy about 9/11 and become a prophet or some poo poo.

hum, this might be smart.

start shaking and fill your mouth with alka seltzer and spout that you had some kind of waking dream that these things would happen. go nuts for a few days, get admitted to a hospital, post on your live journal

use your new found prophecy and get SUPERRRRRRRR RICCHHHHHHHHh. make sure Jesus is involved

NiffStipples
Jun 3, 2011
Take some sweet money shots and sell them to the highest bidding news station or magazine.

fuccboi
Jan 5, 2004

by zen death robot
First of all, I'm going to get laid in high school this time. Nah I'm just kidding.

Roki B
Jul 25, 2004


Medical Industrial Complex


Biscuit Hider
lol i forgot the pentagon got attacked


we4got

Fishy Joe
Apr 19, 2005
Eat at Fishy Joe's
Id rejoin Montley Lou

FrostedButts
Dec 30, 2011
I was 16 at the time.

I would have to carefully, but quickly, plan a means of diverting air travel on the evening of September 10th. To do so, I will need to infiltrate the FAA and try to stage an incident that would cripple airports to-

Holy crap! It's a Saturday and Toonami is on Cartoon Network!

Whatever, I'll just say I'm psychic about 9/11, get a book deal and live off bogus interviews for faux History Channel conspiracy theory shows. Look out, Jesse Ventura. Your time slot is mine.

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


I am 11 or 12 years old and gay, nobody will believe me, so I just live out a hellish repeat of the next decade or so. Wonder how I lived with my year 2000 gateway with AMD Athlon processor, and I will scare the poo poo out of my parents with accurate predictions of the future including 9/11 and a massive personality change + proclivity towards weed.

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien

hemophilia posted:

I am 11 or 12 years old and gay, nobody will believe me, so I just live out a hellish repeat of the next decade or so. Wonder how I lived with my year 2000 gateway with AMD Athlon processor, and I will scare the poo poo out of my parents with accurate predictions of the future including 9/11 and a massive personality change + proclivity towards weed.

holy poo poo computers would be so noticeably old and bad it would be unbearable

EvilTobaccoExec
Dec 22, 2003

Criminals are a superstitious, cowardly lot, so my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts!
Knowing there's little time to lose I jump up from the bed and find the first phone that I can.

Without fear or hesitation, I immediately call a stokebroker to short sell every future I can think of.

In three days I mourn with the rest of the nation, except now as a bajillionare.

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fuccboi
Jan 5, 2004

by zen death robot

EvilTobaccoExec posted:

Knowing there's little time to lose I jump up from the bed and find the first phone that I can.

Without fear or hesitation, I immediately call a stokebroker to short sell every future I can think of.

In three days I mourn with the rest of the nation, except now as a bajillionare.

Which, since it looks shady and suspect as gently caress, is promptly taken from you by the International Banking Jewry that runs the global trade system.

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