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I internet with a wii only.
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Sep 15, 2014 15:54
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 13:00 |
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Can the mobile app please have two different sites depending on whether your phone is vertical or horizontal so that if you tilt it slightly the whole page has to reload the new format? TIA.
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Sep 15, 2014 15:55
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just provide an API lowtax you're too drat cheap with your devs to get anything decent otherwise
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Sep 15, 2014 16:06
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need "select all" and "select all goku" options for polls
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Sep 15, 2014 16:43
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Please have the mobile site be one of those ones where you have to press the "back" button like ten times in succession before you can actually back out of the site. Also please convert the SA main site to be this way also.
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Sep 15, 2014 16:48
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SchmorkyCam
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Sep 15, 2014 19:06
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darkwing cuck posted:working polls, unlike awful
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Sep 15, 2014 19:38
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 13:00 |
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lowtax add a button that automatically posts this: Apparently after my whining some people have kindly suggested I post my story. For your entertainment and abusive purposes I present the following tl’dr. This is kinda train of thought so it’ll meander and have stuff I can be called out for my own b.s. since I'm venting. I’ll regret this crazy but whatever. Thank goodness I lead a very blessed life as I have the world and future open to me, can do nearly anything I want including retire anywhere in the world for a few years if I feel, send two kids to college full ride, nothing holding me back or down financially or otherwise and have accomplished any goal or desire I set for myself in life and am on the path I set for myself…except in dating and relationships. Skipped grades, got my MBA at 23, feed homeless and try to help, volunteer, try to create and build, etc. My parents are wonderful and amazing. They moved heaven and earth for my future, sacrificed and stuck together through harrowing thick and thin, and helped me get set in life, along with some other key individuals like my adopted uncle. My father carried 4 family members on his back from a young age, survived war, was in Air Force, and became a doctor more to support his family than his own desires and didn’t even have his own back account until he was 30 and married carrying them on his back to success themselves. My mother was from privilege and the daughter of a powerful industrialist who intimidated everyone but her. My mother fearing dying from childbirth had to be convinced by my father to have me and that he’d take care of me. Bam! Right from the get go rejected and faced with an uphill battle. I lived first 10 years of life in Saudi Arabia going to a private school set up by American and British Embassies, along with kids from America, children of diplomats and military people and was generally westernized from an early age. While other kids were all “Eeeww cooties.” I was all “That American girl is hot, that actress is hot. I like this girl at school.” And they were all “Eewww.” Welp, I should have guessed that was the tone for the rest of my life. I’ve also lived in Pakistan for a bit, visited family often, and had to spend time there during the first gulf war where my father was staying behind. During a night there was an earthquake in Pakistan and my mother thought America dropped a nuke and we had lost touch with my father for a few days, she feared he was dead. I had to tell her that’s not how things worked. I have great extended family too, amazing successful people and adults who know how to take care of things. In that country, it’s basically survival of the fittest (smartest and capable). I was more familiar with western culture and life than eastern and for the sake of my future and education, and not wanting to live in a backwards country like Saudi Arabia or Pakistan which was on decline and growing fanaticism my parents decided to immigrate to Canada. My father went from being a doctor to having to work in a parking lot booth and my mother from a teacher, selected by Saudi as the top student in her country to teach, to being a Burger King burger flipper. It was rough. While they were trying to figure out how to survive and what to do, with my father having to spend 18 hour days studying to pass exams so he could practice and re-do residency as required along with job and responsibility to family, I was having it rough at school encountering racism and generally being outcast. Like the first time moving into the community was met with a message “We’ll kill you.” And me being beaten up by 3 kids for talking to a white girl. Like, gently caress, cockblocked due to racial reasons, skin color is a bit out of my control. Canada has a huge racist bent to it, even when trying to find a place to live they want to put all the foreigners into a certain community to keep them away and will pressure to do so despite you wanting to live elsewhere. This was Edmonton, Alberta around 92. Partly racism, partly kids being kids and picking on someone. I didn’t have friends and kept to myself, not even having my parents to vent to because they had their own bigger concerns. So I managed and in a way raised myself. While my father was away, traveling for exams and interviews, I had to take care of my mother who had a breakdown even having to call 911. This was a very rough time for all of us but my parents stuck through it and worked themselves to the bone to make it. Thankfully it worked out and we relocated to America where my Dad became a Psychiatrist after going through residency a second time in his mid 40s. High School was awesome, went to a great school with good people and community, went to college, etc. Yet every time I asked a girl out was turned down. No biggie I told myself, there’s still time, everyone ends up with someone. I had this belief as a kid I’d get married and have kids at 25, it was a goal along with others I had set. My main one being a billionaire philanthropist like what Bill Gates is doing now or like a Tony Stark, captain of industry pushing the world forward medically, scientifically, socially, technologically, charity, etc. along with the cool lifestyle. Life went on, I found success and met great people, made great friends, made well for myself thanks to the great start and help given by my parents, and am now pretty well established at my current company despite going through my own rough period of “WTF am I doing? I need to re-evaluate.” And going through the 20s wondering when is it going to pay off and me getting on track. The best way I figured to achieve my goal was to not spend my own money or others or take a loan and start my business but to get to an established company and work my way up. I targeted G.E. and the Aerospace industry, military side, and have worked at both getting myself in the door, establishing relationships and am currently at a Fortune 50 company on the Military Business Unit and thankfully making myself valuable and being given leadership opportunities. I was selected by my boss, a very critical guy out of many to come down and work with him after my first go around as a contractor and am making myself known to senior leadership. It’s great. Life outside, I do what I want, creatively or with friends and co workers on nights out, explore and travel, have been around the world and will visit every continent, even Antarctica as a bucket list. I’ve got a spreadsheet with 30 years planned out. I tend to do and now know how to be. And yet through all this, despite being respected and well liked and being told I have it all, having my peers and even superiors tell me they envy me, I can’t seem to get a date to save my life. Dress well, know how to manage people and relationships, am genuine, etc. blah blah. Never been able to figure it out. So all that was background setting the stage suggesting I’ve developed some character, am generally well made and put together I think, come from a good background, etc. lest there be suggestions of goony fucktard living in his basement and doesn’t get out or has no confidence or whatever. When I was 14 I was in Pakistan and had an option where I might have been able to lose my virginity. There was a girl, early 20s, who was getting married but that culture being what it is wasn’t forthcoming with sexuality so she was scared of expectations. I having taken sex ed pretty much told her what was up and she asked if I would with her. I said no, she’s getting married to a good dude, it’ll be fine and I don’t do that. Especially if, let’s say, she’s not a virgin on wedding night in which case it’ll cause issues so there’s bigger things at stake. Besides, I’ve still got time right? Little did I think it’d take like 14+ years after that. Let’s get it out of the way. I’m short and obviously not good looking. The racial element doesn’t help either, especially after 9/11 but is less of an issue. I ain’t a doctor but damnit I’m pretty well for myself career-wise. Asked out hundreds of women, probably tried over 500 online and tinder and whatever the hip app of the day it is, even gone through the traditional route of culture. It seems unanimously I just ain’t poo poo. I can make friends fine but am not boyfriend material. Alright. First 28 years I be patient, try to work and develop myself and figure out what I might be doing wrong. Maybe I just never hung out with guys when they went out to bars or clubs trolling for pussy so never learned skills or whatever the gently caress I’ve been told to do at this age. Go up to women, introduce myself, been told am a great conversationalist, they seem to have a good time, but never gets past that initial hump. Always dealt with rejection fine but eventually it starts to erode confidence a bit and makes me wonder what’s wrong with me. No one seems to find any fault or at least won’t say. I’ve even had harsh rejections from literally introducing myself and being told if I talk to her again she’ll cut off my balls, to being scoffed at before saying anything and just for approaching, ignored completely, stuff any guy can go through, yeah? From middle school and telling a girl I liked her and having her put her hands in her face and go to her friends to having a group of girls dancing disperse the second I approach. Like, seriously? So, okay, good and bad, made some friends, others didn’t work out, whatever. At 26 I’ve been asked by my mother “Are you gay? It’s okay you know.” To frustration from their ends, being an only child and thus must continue the family, and saying “Everyone has someone, why don’t you?” and the gently caress am I gonna say to that outside of “No, I definitely know I’m not gay.” ? I don’t know why I fail, and apparently neither do my peers at that time or I’ve not had that feedback. Don’t know what’s wrong with me and get told the usual supportive bullshit. I’ve heard and experienced it all, “in time, don’t look and it’ll find you, blah blah bullshit vomit.” I’ve had situations where I’ve asked out women who weighed more than me despite not exactly being physically attracted but thinking they were cool although they were co workers and in any case don’t dip in company ink is what they felt. So I’ve gone Ahab for a few Slam Whales and didn’t find the white one. Fuuuuck. Not even? That bad? Faced with my options and reality I decide to accept trying the traditional route of marriage. Go over to Pakistan to go with matchmakers and be introduced to ladies and families. This was a hella adventure. If I had to guess over the course of a few years I’ve gone through 100+ girls presented in the U.S., Canada and Pakistan. It’s basically presenting life resumes and picture and if both parties are interested then okay talk and decide to get married and depending on how open minded and modern the family is maybe you two can find out about each other beforehand. Or not. This is where at the very least things got blunt and I got the feedback I needed. I’m short and not good looking but everything else is fine…except in the cases where I’m not making six to seven figures but that’s a rarer issue. "So what's your package?" Literal first question a Dad asked me. “My cousin is in Manhattan making seven figures on Wall Street and also has an MBA like you? What went wrong?” As for short? “We don’t want the children to suffer.” Or “Oh this would be perfect but…he’s just too short.” And in other case having a mother walk into the room and her jaw slightly drop of disappointment and what I assume was disgust. The daughter seemed interested, but gently caress no I wasn’t going to touch her since Mother had her way. It was actually funny reading that body language and going through it and in a way relief that “Well at least I know what the deal is now. It’s all physical.” Other cases I did the turning down because of them being too conservative, not being able to even see the girl or meet her, etc. Like in one case my Father asked for a picture of the girl to show me but mentioned family was too religious and conservative. They got mad at us because why the gently caress would we even ask for the picture if we weren’t going to get married and were terrible muslims and burn the picture and go to hell. But eventually did find a girl and family. My own relatives didn’t feel it was the right choice but she was my pick. Did pre-med, honors chemistry, said she was ambitious, carried herself well, was beautiful with model figure, etc. seemed great on paper. I forced the situation where we had to find out about each other for a time, we talked (chaperoned) and I made a point it was to be her choice with no pressure on her. I shoulda looked at the billionaire brother in law/mafia don figure who was 60s and married to a 26 year old and walked away but, nope, this was gonna be it, I’m making a decision. Neither of us are in love or whatever but if she agrees I’ll try this out. Get legally married, wait for her visa for 2 years, and then go over to finish ceremonies and bring her home. Oh boy was that a disaster all the way through. She was in love with brother in law, they had a thing going, the family wanted her to marry me and send her to America so they could save her sister’s marriage, etc. I’d send her flowers for valentine’s day, he’d send a room of flowers. Ooookay. She wants me to buy $500 shoes for him as a gift…yeeeahh, no. “Oh I’m so pretty I thought you’d do anything for me.” Nooooooo, that’s not how its gonna work in all situations, why does this billionaire need expensive gifts from a girl who don't work or me? He shouldn't give a poo poo and should be the one handing them out. “Build me a house, give me a car…in the U.S. and overseas.” – “Hey, Haithum, get her a Mercedes S550 new. She deserves it.” Okay so built a 6 bed house…overseas, did get her a Mercedes in the U.S. spent like a fool to make her happy…and still she’s not satisfied. "Oh it's not about money. It's about important things in life." Yeeeeahhhh. Completely entitled, brat, thinks herself highly and even called out by her friends for being high maintenance while doing nothing but sitting on her butt and actually having no ambition but calling back home to her brother in law. I offer her some volunteer opportunities, get out and be social, willing to put her through a Masters program, etc. I treat her very well, show her all I can of America and travel and what she's curious about, even like a male strip club and get her dances so she can experience something she never would back home and she has a blast. Whatever, she should have fun. Two responsibilities, make sure our room is clean and cook dinner and it’s too much for her. I was told the fact I like to spoil her makes her think I have little value and she’s doing me a favor. “But…she’s my wife, who else if not her?” “No, you gotta be a man and put your foot down and keep her in her place. She’s not an American woman, it works differently where she’s from.” Like her brother in law said to his wife “Husband is God.” And the poo poo I was supposed to do. On wedding night 1 I nearly get arrested because curfew was violated and so were some laws in the ceremony her side arranged, we had to get away from police in the dead of night and drive away and her uncle being a politician set things right. The actual wedding night she’s emotional, I feel bummed because she’s going through a lot, her life’s gonna change and be away from family and I don’t really know if it’s that or based on my experiences with women if it’s me, so okay let’s not do the deed and I’ll wait until we’re in a better place. Welp, apparently in tradition the next day any sisters or female cousins give the bride her breakfast and find out if everything went right during the night. As in “Did it stand up? Is he a man?” So I get my mother angry out of the blue for not “asserting myself” and have to explain to ex-wife's mother who is devastated and asking “Is something wrong? I don’t understand.” And then have to explain to her family that “WTF? I ain’t forcing myself on her if she’s not in a good place, that’s not how I or poo poo works.” Apparently that is how poo poo works. Her brother in law, who she worships, apparently took her sister on wedding night as she was resisting and crying, put his hand over her mouth and did what he had to show he was a man. And to me that’s like “The gently caress have I gotten myself into? This is what’s expected of me and the type of people I’ve made family?” so it’s performance pressure over the next month or so to prove myself and the gently caress? She also wasn’t a virgin which to me is no biggie, but to her family oh boy if they found out. Her brother in law. Okay fine that was lovely but now I’m in America and we’re together and hopefully it’ll go smooth. NOPE. Families are involved, fights, threats made to mine about how they’ll wipe out our entire family and outnumber us, blasphemy law poo poo, ransom, etc. And trying to navigate all this thanks to the help from my parents and my extended family, manage to end it and divorce and in a way that made it work out. And they still try to extort money after the fact in laughable ways. That's still not the worst personal thing she did. Jesus, okay, never going through that again. gently caress the traditional route and bringing someone over. 3.5 years down the tubes. Before getting married I had met a girl, I’ll call her L, who is probably the closest thing to a love I’ve had. I fell hard for her after a few months. She was in a prison camp as a kid during a war, over came learning disabilities, challenges, is the second person in family to get a degree, knows the value of hard work, is amazingly beautiful, seems like a patient and understanding person and is strong. She'll get to where she wants to be one day. Sounds good to me, sounds like a partner who can also add to my life. Both appreciate what Bill Gates is doing, both had situations where we were thrown in a pool and told to swim but while she's scared of the water I love swimming even though as a kid had to be resuscitated cause my Uncle just threw me in at like age 5 and told me to make it work. We never had a relationship but were friends. Met her while I was taking classes, interjected myself into the conversation she was having with some dude and introduced myself, and asked her out at the end. Not interested. But we still hung out and became friends. Alright, that’s fine. More I found out about her, more I liked her, that we had some similar experiences in life, and she seemed like a great person. But, welp, just not interested in dating, just friends. Alright, alright. We were friends for years, she and my ex-wife and I had dinner, blah blah, but my ex-wife was jealous of her and tried to get me to unfriend her and I didn’t do it. I loved that girl despite being married to someone else, in an effort to move on and give it time, but, well, I always had feelings for her. She got married and divorced around the same time I did. I try to hit her up again after my divorce but, oh, she’s just not sexually attracted to me, there’s no connection on the level of somewhere up there in the ether. Alright. “Oh hay, you have feelings for me, maybe we shouldn’t see each other.” Wait…we’re friends…so I have feelings…so what? I don’t have your consent, i can't do anything? Are you scared I'm going to try something? Now you’re telling me to gently caress off? Fine I guess, I’ll not bother you. “No, be my friend. We should be friends.” “What, like a pen pal? The gently caress?” Whatever, be patient and give it time and it’ll work out and I’ll manage it but I’m really hosed and sad about all this and take to whining on the forums. She whines about her life and suckage of relationships constantly so okay I set her up with someone who is a co-worker, R, I’ve worked with for 8 months at G.E. Good looking and athletic, has a career track, side business that probably allows him to make close to six figures, and so on. Looks good on paper. But something weird happens the two days before they’re due to meet. Apparently he runs into an incident where some girl from Estonia came to visit the U.S. for a guy she met online and ended up being berated by him and kept in his house and not allowed to go anywhere. She leaves, forgets all her stuff in his house, uses the dating site to get in touch with R who then apparently does something to make her uncomfortable so he calls me up and asks me to help her. Well, gently caress, okay. So I meet up with her at the hotel she’s staying at, ask her if she’s alright, does she need help, if she was stuck in some dude’s house like a prisoner did he do something to violate her, do we need to contact authorities or medical or anything, did she get in touch with her Embassy because apparently she lost her passport and phone, tell her to use the front desk of the hotel for guidance and calling and so forth, what is her plan to return home or get to the next place and here’s my suggestions on what to do, blah blah. Try to get her situated so she can be on her way. She paints an unflattering picture of R, that he apparently came on to her knowing her situation and was being creepy. Well, okay, so this guy I set up with my friend is apparently a creeper so I tell L hold off on seeing him and explain what’s going on. R gets pissed off but whatever. L still wants to meet R and we argue for 2 days about it cause I’m not comfortable with whatever I’m hearing and involved in. But whatever, she says she’s a grown woman who can take care of herself so alright. I follow up with girl from Estonia and eventually she manages to work it with the Embassy to be taken home so great, she’ll be fine. I’m out. OMG he’s the one, omg she’s never felt this, omg I should be proud of setting her up with him and obviously that girl from overseas is lying this guy is a gentleman. I’m like, great, glad it’s working out but now I gotta step out of this, you two take it, but you don’t rush into anything, give it a year cause you gotta see what this guy’s like in whatever situations will happen, temper, etc. Oh but it’ll work out. Fine. Welp, me being me, ends up sucked into drama and gets to listen to her whine about all the issues about the relationship that no doubt pop up. She’s high maintenance, he’s insecure about his manhood as she's strong and intimidates him and is an rear end in a top hat. Apparently a huge rear end in a top hat. All kinds of bullshit. Well, that sucks. I guess I don’t know people when it comes to dating and relationships cause dude seems fine and it’s her side of the story but I’d imagine it’s up to them. I regret setting her up because he’s apparently a weirdo creeper but then again I did warn her. I even severed for a time to give them a chance but she gets in touch with me and says we should be friends. Good people are hard to find. My boss to be in Texas wants me and since I can learn a lot from him and get a good career going under him I opt to go to Texas even though I can save more money in Cleveland, like bank $50K a year, but whatever it’s not like I need to do that so I might as well go to Texas and see if I can get into a position that’ll allow for better upwards mobility since I have a rep over there. I get a nice relocation package, executive relocation package, no one but him and I got that to move down there, all expenses taken care of for a month. I took a $35K paycut to work at G.E. to pursue my goals but this will allow me to make up $25K back annually so okay I move for my boss and friend, who considers me family. The company wants me back, the Program Managers, I get wined and dined while in Cleveland and am asked “No, when are you moving down?” so alright I guess, they want me, I’ll go. During this time apparently R does something so horrible L doesn’t speak to him for weeks but L wants to give it another chance, she hasn’t felt so much stress since her time in the war. “Okay so this guy is worth her time for a relationship, but I’m someone who shouldn’t meet her cause despite knowing her for years and being friends I have feelings for her. I guess I’m worse than the war then.” But whatever. She doesn’t get back with him and to this day he’s still not over it. I’m moving to Texas for career and my own goals. I get poo poo done, whatever it is, that needs to get done even if no one has any idea how or what to do, I manage it or find a way and been told give off a vibe that makes a work environment more upbeat and positive and energetic and pull even hardasses together as a team to accomplish something. Hence I’m given a lot of opportunity and voluntold a lot. “We’ve had this order for 5 years, got an extension for a year, but uh can you get this out in 2 weeks? Oh by the way two days before it’s supposed to deliver we’ll tell you the customer and we will lose funding if it doesn’t make it. $300,000 grand.” Ooookay. I get help from site director and coordinate the team and we all work to make it and succeed. “Oh, you’ve got 15 days, think we can make two hundred grand…no, half a million in sales for spares for your program? No one else in the company put together a plan for this in years and no one is able to make that one facility that produces the parts give due dates or get their poo poo together even Executive leadership but good luck!” Uuhhhh…I’m not even the right level or employee for this? “Hay, so you’re new, been here two months and we kinda laid off the guy who knew how our system at G.E. works. You’re in charge by default for our supply chain and processes, good luck in figuring it all out because our division will be at a standstill otherwise.” And it ends up some Executives come to me “I heard you’re the guy who makes things happen. I need help.” Not my boss, not his subordinates, me. My boss even is surprised “Wait, you’re a GCL of prototyping and testing? How’d you end up doing that?” So if I can do that, then why can’t I get a date with someone I like? What is it that I can’t figure out or be? It’s kinda frustrating and disheartening. Business and life is people, it's relationships and when the world tests you it isn't necessarily bad, learn about yourself and what's important and keep strong, adjust if necessary, it's up to you on what you compromise on and how the decision will affect you but yeah there's outside influence and it's not all bootstraps. You want to build a country, a business, anything great? It's more than just you. And the concept of what is a success for a kid or person is different in today's environment, something like living at home is not failure. Some cultures are fine with it, have generations under a roof taking care of family. America needs a re-evaluation for it's current times and its values. R is still to this day harassing her, I’ve told her to file a report and to tell her family and friends and she’ll consult her ex’s because for some reason I’m the first person she comes to for issues. Well I’m a friend so okay. Welp, apparently not a friend worth her time. First she’s all gung ho about coming down to Texas but after I line up some connections for her to talk to she’s AWOL. I guess I make her uncomfortable. Huh, okay. I’m hurt here since she’s the one who was open to it and knew I’d work for it. Maybe I shouldn’t have offered her to room with me, 2 bed place, and that I’d take care of expenses until she gets settled if the company doesn’t offer relocation. But whatever, I let it slide. Later she’s having issues at work, stressing her out, and asks for advice and vents to me, I suggest a few things to her and try to help her get a job elsewhere using connections for a second time. I make plans to meet her up in Cleveland but then by the time I’m going up there since she’s going through a really tough time at work, she’s sick, coughing up blood blah blah, I tell her to take care of herself and not worry about it. I come back. Naturally my friends and family are like, “Dude, come on. Let her go.” And the friends who I’m using as connections also feel the same way. She’s fine two weeks later to go to Chicago for her friend’s wedding. Ahh, alright. All of this is my own doing, I don’t blame her for any of it, it’s me carrying her printer to Dubai. I know this. But what pisses me off is getting in touch with her a few weeks later, after not speaking to her, and her not messaging me and getting the statement “So you’re done being mad at me? Because I was sick? Says a lot about you.” …. Guilt trip? For what? Says what about me? I’ve been told all kinds of poo poo, “Oh give her the cold shoulder, do this, play her like this, this is what you do, you’re a beta orbiter dude, you’re this and this is what it is, she lost respect for you, blah blah blah” and I ignore all that, treat her like a friend and as a good person but apparently I’ve done something wrong. I get pissed and call her out on all her poo poo, but omg she can’t take it. Regardless I apologize after and still keep in touch but it’s not the same, she’s now snippy and different that I’ve “grown a spine” (per friends) so I “dump” her and move on. Still got feelings, wish it’d work out, but whatever. I’ve whined about it for ages on here to the point people are all “Post your drama, entertain us.” So here it is. So here’s what I’ve felt, observed and found out. A lot of people cannot tell the difference between confidence and arrogance and ego. Maybe because there are elements of it projected in the latter. There's a desire for rugged individuality and seeking that out, "Oh that rear end in a top hat doesn't need to prove himself or need anyone or anything" which is actually in a way counter productive which is fine but he's not going to be a leader or be the person to necessarily build something great and inspire. Not in all cases, but there's a line between all that and a balance of being self assured and confident and setting boundries but the projection of that and how its done confuses people. When attracted or in love a person for some reason puts a person on a kind of pedestal sometimes, saying stuff like “Oh so confident! So sweet!” and so forth even when not true. I’ve accidently in conversation cockblocked a few dudes who are dating my friends, like they discover the dude is lying about having a college degree and so she dumps him but he was greater than sliced bread! So if a girl is really into a guy there’ll be some b.s. about him being so great when there ain’t. Same with guys pining for girls and I’m guilty of that like with L. Guy I set L up with? She says he was jealous of me and didn’t want us to hang together. And he’s the one she’d prefer that was OMG so awesome. Confidence is reinforced by how you act and how things respond to you and thus you feel comfortable behaving a certain way. That "rear end in a top hat" ? If he didn't get what he wanted, he wouldn't behave that way if it wasn't reinforced to him it was okay. He'd adjust. If you align confidence and know yourself, trust in your actions and values, and get in a good state of mind you can project conviction too and it creates charisma that can inspire. A lot of women and guys want to be entertained more than look for legitimate relationship, maturity, and feel entitled to have it all in a partner and have things go magically like some rom com or Disney movie rather than compromise or know what’s important in life, what it takes to get to where you want to be, and think of the future. Hey, we all want it all but 98% isn't like that in life, there's something to work on so decide if you gonna wait or compromise on something you feel is less of a priority for you and work it. I’ve been told I’m not confident with women…but then again I’ve been told I have more balls and can approach people, situations, women that others are intimidated by. Sometimes even told I have more balls than brains. I’ve been told “Chuck all the decency bullshit I’ve been taught and get in there and get physical and just get up all in her.” This guy has had women chase him 80 miles an hour on the highway, get attached and stalk him, when he cuts off communication so a girl moves on she apparently doesn’t eat for like 3 weeks, this guy is a good guy with a great career and style and personality but he’s a player and he admits it and he does the poo poo that women complain about but it’s okay, he’s hot. Now of course this guy can do that, he’s tall, great looking, he gets away with it. One of my friends who is 6’4” and I’ve seen women drool at him, get whiplash, can get away with approaching tables for the same women that whine bitch and moan about being harassed by guys wanting to date them and he can get girlfriends out of it, he’s great right? This is why you don’t listen to the poo poo on the forums about women whining about this, because if they’re attracted to you, it’ll work out. You gotta read the situation. This is a dude who thought “This girl I’m in a relationship with had sex with a black guy, so now I gotta cheat on her with a black girl.” And I’m like “Dude are you sane?” who I’ve kept out of trouble and given advice to, who himself admits he’s not a great dude and was a dog to women (but has made dramatic strides and got married to the woman who God was saying was his…though now he thinks marriage is too limiting and won’t do it again but he’s gonna make it work, and to his credit is), this guy is who women lust after and cry over. And they have terrible views on women because of their experiences and what women are willing to cheat on or do or make fun of their boyfriends to cheat with them. I get scoffed at, ignored, and if I were to do the same things, hello creeper. So my approach is pretty much open introduction and conversation and feeling the situation out. I get numbers, I get complimented but it never materializes into something. Alright, I get it I’m not good looking, short and have more challenge to overcome, it just is. I’ve tried to retain a positive outlook, keep my values and character in tough situations, faltered recently, and am trying not to get bitter about things. Whatever, focus on enjoying life but I’m not optimistic about dating and relationships at all. Maybe I punch above my weight class, but I’ve punch all classes, haven’t had results. I’ve had friends try to set me up but then it doesn’t work out from their end after they see me. Somehow I’ve managed to get into a threesome with two lovely girls after my divorce but that’s something I don’t get how it happened, regardless still keep in touch with them after my move, one might visit down my way later. My one big win. What matters in dating, and what it essentially is, is two people meeting and finding interest in each other. But what sets it off is the physical attraction. You like what you see? Then okay let’s find out more about this person and see what happens. Hot but nothing else? One night stand, fuckbuddy. Not good looking? Maybe a friend or who gives a poo poo. Nothing else past this point, no curiosity or care. If she’s like “gently caress yeah” then it’ll be easy, same for the dude and there won’t need to be questions about “Should I do this, what’s she thinking, is she on the fence?” If she or he is on the fence, it’s likely not going to work out. If both parties are into it then all the creepy sappy clingy poo poo is romantic and great. But it’s the physical thing that makes the difference to begin with so be at your best condition, physically, mentally, emotionally, blah blah cause you never know when you’ll meet the one you really want and if you want it to go further than just superficial stuff. But the physical element of it is the difference maker. Everyone wants beauty, they think that’s good genes even if internally it isn’t because of potential heart conditions or whatever. Whatever list or qualifications or requirements a woman has will be thrown out the window or compromised if she finds the dude attractive enough, the tree trunk that makes them feel great that they can rest again and make others jealous of what they got, they got a winner and feel like a winner. So many women want to feel special that “OMG he could have anyone but chose me!” and to me it’s like “Really, that’d make you feel special and what gives you value? There’s more important stuff out there to do and draw value from and accomplish.” I’ve got a friend right now who’s talked with me about his girl asking him questions he’s told her she doesn’t want the answers for, that I’ve told him its because she’s insecure, because he says she wants to know what makes her special and unlike all the other girls. I don’t need to feel special or chosen or something and lets face it, I’m no prize I guess. Men think with their dicks often enough and looks are a high priority too for their status for those who can. But in no way does that make a man. The amount of women I’ve encountered who go “Where have the good guys gone?” Make me lol because they would not know what makes a real man or what a good guy is even if God handed one to them because maybe he don’t look-a-like a man they had in their head. Content of character makes a man, a person, and is the most important thing in a friendship or relationship along with his or her ability/skills to manage a life and relationships and commit. Anderson Cooper, who in the middle of a firefight went in and saved a kid, that’s a man. He’s been tested. This guy is a real man, he’s worth dating and will bleed to give you the world or everything you say you want So if you want what you think you want, then go for it. But holy crap the amount of whining I’ve heard and lack of ability to compromise to get it all because the wrapper wasn’t right or some tiny thing was off like not carrying bags and be petty. Like “OMG he’s texting me so much?! He wants to talk to me!? No life, gotta dump him, clingy!” instead of “Hay, some space is appreciated dude.” And see if he can control himself. Why look for excuses to dismiss? What is this "game" bullshit? You want a game or a relationship and a good life with someone? And I’m no saint either, cause yeah I’d love to be attracted to my girl, it’s normal, but I’ve more than been willing to compromise for something I felt was worth it. And no I couldn’t do what’s in the link below. http://www.snopes.com/photos/military/ziegel.asp Can this person add to my life, can I trust her and bring her or him into my world and make it better and if we have kids have them well off and accomplished along with my own goals. Love, attraction and sex will not make things work, the spark is bullshit whatever you think that is, that doesn't pull things through. You can love a person and leave them. It's all a choice, a decision, that's what keeps long marriages and relationships and ability put effort into it to make it work for the best and compromise where necessary. But that’s all if the package looks right for too many. So many women bitch and moan about being harassed all the time, but the same women will get miffed if some dude in a bar or store or whatever they find hot doesn’t approach them and don’t have the guts to go up to him. And the lists some have. Their perception is “I’m just a simple girl. I just need a guy to love who is responsible, has a good career, can take care of me when pregnant, like a man should.” And when I set her up I get two days of lists and qualifications and her own terms of service agreement like drive a real man car and good teeth and blah and blah and on and on and can’t be this or do this or do that. And women often want genetic qualifiers, like broad shoulders and V shape or strong jaw, or height, which yeah to each their own, men have their own requirements if they can afford it but I’ve understood men to actually be more willing to compromise and be open to body types and something a person has control over like weight. Women I’ve found are more shallow than men and often for features that are out of a person’s control. Which, yeah I guess that’s just the way it is so deal. And the nice guy. Women bitch and moan about it and it’s hilarious. The same entitled women complain “OMG you’re just being nice to me to get pussy.” And keep them as friends, and they’re great friends willing to go to lengths, “But you just want my pussy. You’re not actually nice. Especially if you feel hurt, you’re not a person and should be a robot who doesn’t feel. Stop being entitled to my pussy, you shouldn’t feel like it’s a reward. Be a toy.” Which is true, person should be mature enough to keep it to friends if she isn’t interested and move on but that’s not entitlement. Entitlement is not trying to prove one’s self worthy and worthwhile and jumping through hoops and carrying printers. This guy is acting out all the stuff he’s heard and read about and behaving in a way that the woman says she wants and wanting to demonstrate he’s worth her time, but since she’s not attracted to him, it confounds him because “Isn’t this what she says she wants? Why’s she with some dude who is the opposite?” Cause he’s hot to her, you’re not, she wants his cock and that’s the way it is and she’ll put up with however amount of bullshit is of her tolerance for it, leave her be, evaluate yourself and better yourself if necessary and go find someone else, it’s her choice an you have control over yourself so take care of yourself and go live your life. The “friendzone” is friendship, it's unrequited love, things that have been around for centuries and had poems written and poo poo. If she’s a good person then great keep her and it’s a good thing, just manage your feelings, but if she’s not then you’re there for her amusement. This guy is more foolish and pitiable for having feelings for someone who doesn't feel the same and yeah things might get emotional or heated but lol if you're the girl who sits and feels like he was a jerk to you for asserting himself if he's hurt or feels slighted. Oh my God, what a bad thing, he is a person with feelings and desires too just like you. Dump his rear end if it's too much, and he should be strong enough to do the same for his own sake and your's and manage himself. What an rear end in a top hat. What a bitch because she doesn't have feelings for you? Riiiight. It's a small thing in the grand scheme of things if you aren't hurt physically or in some other way that affects your life. And E/N itself is hilarious. So much contradiction and anti-social and seeming inability to actually deal with things. Sever, first reaction, run away from something that inconveniences you than manage it or make an effort then make a decision. It’s a joke for a reason. The attitude in dating and other things is basically “gently caress you, got mine” when the same people bitch and moan about older generations and life loving them over and society having this attitude. Rare to have compassion and spend a bit of time testing the waters. Then there are helpful people and good advice but that’s rare and there’s resistance to it, the peeing down a well. On the one hand have confidence, ask her out stupid, don’t be a beep boop robot, “OMG what do you mean there’s biological impulses/study/observation behind my actions? gently caress you, I am in complete control of everything and myself” contrasted with “NEVER APPROACH A WOMAN EVER UNLESS YOU ARE PSYCHIC AND KNOW I’LL LIKE YOU! Stop being creepy and rapey. Only in this designated social zone with these specific behaviors that's common sense am i rite? But don't beep boop be a robot. But be a robot, don’t feel or want anything. I’m not attracted to you, it just is, I can’t help it.” The MRA movement is retarded and full of bitter men but the other side with the overzealous feminists being entitled and non-self aware are amplified on the internet. No compassion, empathy, accountabity. Like this… http://elitedaily.com/dating/men-ps...n-dates/746965/ And she’s called out for her B.S. in the articles. (By the way, Elite Daily is a crappy site). Sex and relationships aren't end all be all, but any person has needs and hope of acceptance and feeling satisfied. When it comes to that stuff I've always wondered why I'm not good enough and what can I do to get there. So anyway, what up?
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Sep 15, 2014 20:40
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