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Neukoln19
Oct 27, 2005
See I was raised believing in heaven but even then that was a murky idea at best. I guess I don't know. And maybe the issue here is that I'm having some anxiety over this.

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klapman
Aug 27, 2012

this char is good
u dead

great big cardboard tube
Sep 3, 2003


kill yourself and find out

Al Borland
Oct 29, 2006

by XyloJW
IF you're a good person you go to heaven where anime is banned.

If you're a bad person you go to hell where all you do is watch that one little girl screecher anime thing non stop on repeat. Then they make you live perform it.

Kleen_TheRacistDog
Feb 17, 2014

Can't bust the Krust fuckman
www.skullmund.com
when i meet st. peter at the pearly gates, i'll be doing so with my dick in my hand and my middle finger extended.

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

a creepy colon
Oct 28, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

when i meet st. peter at the pearly gates, i'll be doing so with my dick in my hand and my middle finger extended.

Hell yeah :rock:

Torka
Jan 5, 2008

peace.

Gallow
Apr 9, 2002

I SUPPORT ALL THE PREDATORS
LARDROOM

BUTT PIPE
Oct 11, 2012
cucked in front of your 72 virgins

ilikedirt
Oct 15, 2004

king of posting
i posted a thread about dis a few weeks ago if u look it up in it p much explain u turn into some kinda ghost and get assigned a ghost job that u do mindlessly anyways peace out hth

Cosmik Slop
Oct 9, 2007

What's a hole doing in my TARDIS?


Well, assuming you're dying of natural causes, first you'll start to lose interest in people and things you used to feel close to. Appetite will diminish. Skin will become waxy and pale. Hands and feet will become cold. Breathing and heartbeat will become increasingly irregular. You may begin to see hallucinations (dead loved ones being a common theme). A hospice agency may take an interest in you, or it may not. Towards the very end you'll most likely go into Cheyne-Stokes respirations: periods of apnea followed by long, gasping snores. At some point in the process something will give out and you'll die. Your experience may vary.

Lightanchor
Nov 2, 2012
You return to the Great Room

Nic Cage dick cage
Jun 23, 2009

Lipstick Apathy
If you've been good you hear this as the pearly gates open: Saint-Saens: Symphony no.3 http://youtu.be/Hmo30e15Bzg and you receive a companion of your choice for all eternity with a great arse.
If you've been bad you hear the same thing but this time your companion is forced on you for all eternity and says "That's the song from 'Babe'!" every five minutes while mouth breathing.

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

your body is already the product of stardust so it cant be any worse you loving pussy

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

i hope my carbon molecules are directly involved in a super nova somehow

Senior Management
Jul 3, 2011



you cause your family to pay an annoying bill to deal with your corpse.

Neukoln19
Oct 27, 2005

Vynar posted:

you cause your family to pay an annoying bill to deal with your corpse.

I'm going to die in Tibet and have a sky burial.

Das Butterbrot
Dec 2, 2005
Lecker.
when you get buried dyou become a skeleton in the ground which is pretty metal tbqh

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

been waiting for a chance to use this again:

Beef Turret
Jul 9, 2009

by Lowtax

Christmas Miracle posted:

been waiting for a chance to use this again:


Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

can't one post their sincere opinion about the afterlife in the form of a madden giferator without being labeled an atheist?

giZm
Jul 7, 2003

Only the insane equates pain with success

Neukoln19 posted:

See I was raised believing in heaven but even then that was a murky idea at best. I guess I don't know. And maybe the issue here is that I'm having some anxiety over this.
You will be forced to watch time slow down until it crystalizes and consumes your soul.

Junkfist
Oct 7, 2004

FRIEND?
You go to Heaven or Hell, depending on what side of #gamergate you're on.

Lamebot
Sep 8, 2005

ロボ顔菌~♡
putrefaction

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

hey atheist what does gods cum taste like?

Wicker Man
Sep 5, 2007

Just like Columbus...


Clapping Larry
I no longer have to put up with your bullshit.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.
What happened before you were born?

Senior Management
Jul 3, 2011



redshirt posted:

What happened before you were born?

nothing of interest

EA Sports
Feb 10, 2007

by Azathoth
well if you think about it, your individual existence really seems based on something undefinable. nobody can say what mechanism can make nearly identical physical beings develop into an individual experience. it would make most sense to assume that whatever makes us an individual is something that we are all part of when not existing as individuals.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.

EA Sports posted:

well if you think about it, your individual existence really seems based on something undefinable. nobody can say what mechanism can make nearly identical physical beings develop into an individual experience. it would make most sense to assume that whatever makes us an individual is something that we are all part of when not existing as individuals.

We call it "The Great Link".

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
we all cum togerhder dummy

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005
It's just one unending orgasm for the rest of eternity.

extra stout
Feb 24, 2005

ISILDUR's ERR

Seizure Robot posted:

kill yourself and find out

suicide is a brazen approach to the questions of philosophy for those too adventurous and curious to be satisfied with empty words

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

an amazing all you can eat buffet including unlimited crab legs that never run out

Wicker Man
Sep 5, 2007

Just like Columbus...


Clapping Larry
You respawn in a random new location on earth with a chance of being somehow lamer than the person you currently are now.

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW
It's probably the same thing that happens before you are born.

Wicker Man
Sep 5, 2007

Just like Columbus...


Clapping Larry
I'll probably be some clubfooted Indian guy in the year 2078 who grows up playing with turds for toys.

extra stout
Feb 24, 2005

ISILDUR's ERR

Wicker Man posted:

I'll probably be some clubfooted Indian guy in the year 2078 who grows up playing with turds for toys.

i thought you said lamer than you are now

Vastarien
Dec 20, 2012

Where I live is nightmare, thus a certain nonchalance.



Buglord
Well, first the worms will crawl in. And then they'll crawl out. And at some point they'll play pinochle on your snout.

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les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien
Worms and other poo poo eats you and then farts you out

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