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i save my game
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Sep 23, 2014 17:17
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Hey everybody I'm a dragon born powerleveling piece of poo poo and i am gonna ruin ur game suck it
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Sep 23, 2014 17:18
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pls roll for initiaitive
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Sep 23, 2014 17:19
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Chaotic Neutral Cleric here. Time to raise an undead army. *Casts Animate Dead*
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Sep 23, 2014 18:04
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Can I play a Kender?
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Sep 23, 2014 18:08
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sry all my only spell is turn jackal but if u need to scare a jackal i got u covered
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Sep 23, 2014 18:08
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Dongattack posted:pls roll for initiaitive no need for my character to roll initiative as he is currently masturbating and therefore last to act in the round
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Sep 23, 2014 18:09
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my artifact dart "mistwiggler" has +2 to hit against spiders (NOT giant spiders)
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Sep 23, 2014 18:31
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Someone please make a spreadsheet so that I can effectively use my imagination
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Sep 23, 2014 21:11
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I had a friend "perform" surgery on a dude with an axe I told him to roll for it and he got a 2
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Sep 23, 2014 21:16
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I heard that D&D 5.0 will have Exotic Animal Proficiency as a feat. What animal should I pick?
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Sep 23, 2014 21:25
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Can I play as a swarm of 100 6" high dwarven leatherdaddies
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Sep 23, 2014 21:28
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I cast magic missile.
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Sep 23, 2014 21:35
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Vordhosbn posted:I cast magic missile. you kill 2 (two) dwarf leatherdaddies. the remainder of the swarm recruits 16 (sixteen) more dwarven leatherdaddies the leatherdaddies spend a full round actionn crafting some kind of giant electric clockwork dildo
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Sep 23, 2014 21:44
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APD (Always play Dwarves).
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Sep 23, 2014 21:47
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I would like to roll my two dice in the DM's mouth. Thanks.
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Sep 23, 2014 21:54
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Gimp Fack posted:I would like to roll my two dice in the DM's mouth. Thanks. okay, Gimp Fack please roll 2d4+1 for dick length and 1d3 for circumference, and I need a dc 20 stamina(sex) check
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Sep 23, 2014 21:56
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my character rubs his man boobs titillatingly to charm the rest of the party
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Sep 23, 2014 22:08
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Someone please play a hot girl so I can neg her.
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Sep 23, 2014 22:24
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youbane: artifact spear that does 2d20 bonus damage when used against its owner, with a 25% chance of killing them instantly
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Sep 23, 2014 22:28
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Inevitable posted:Someone please play a hot girl so I can neg her. my 114 6" high dwarves neg you "you're too tall, tallass". roll a will save (hard)
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Sep 23, 2014 23:48
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oh gently caress I found this talking sword but all it says is the word "cuck"
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Sep 23, 2014 23:48
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If you think about it life is just a game of D&D where u rolled really badly for charisma and initiative
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Sep 23, 2014 23:49
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CountButtula posted:my 114 6" high dwarves neg you "you're too tall, tallass". roll a will save (hard) I am unable to resist their PUA proficiencies and become emotionally sucked into a terrible, terrible relationship with them.
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Sep 24, 2014 01:37
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My gnome tinkerer bought an arquebus, reverse engineered and subsequently improved upon the design, then spent all of his gold from a dungeon run to craft more in a forge. My jagoff party members refuse to understand the concept of volley fire and won't so much as look at weapon that they're not specialized in, so now I'm just a tiny man with a slow, inaccurate, cumbersome weapon.
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Sep 24, 2014 02:29
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I was given a set number of gold pieces to gear up at the start of this adventure and I found that I could, in fact, purchase a mule. By god that mule is coming with us. Everywhere. No I DON'T care.
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Sep 24, 2014 02:33
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Big Beef City posted:I was given a set number of gold pieces to gear up at the start of this adventure and I found that I could, in fact, purchase a mule. DM'ed this campaign as well.
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Sep 24, 2014 02:36
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I'd dual class necromancer so I could raise a skeleton platoon, but the DM's girlfriend is 7 months pregnant and his boss wants him to start closing on Saturdays, so this poo poo's going to be over in a couple weeks.
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Sep 24, 2014 02:38
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VendaGoat posted:DM'ed this campaign as well. better than the other campaign tho
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Sep 24, 2014 02:39
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 a sphere of annihilation rolls around destroying the party like pac-man destroying puny dots it moves on to the rest of the world there are no survivors
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Sep 24, 2014 02:49
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zng5kRle4FA
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Sep 24, 2014 02:57
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To progress to the next level you must learn witch craft in real life bring me a child from your neighborhood
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Sep 24, 2014 05:06
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When are we gathering for the next session?
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Sep 26, 2014 16:19
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I have literally nothing to do ever so let's just play every day
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Sep 26, 2014 16:34
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i can cast aspersions up to ninth level
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Sep 26, 2014 16:36
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i cast "rebuke spider" at lvl 4 e: it DOES NOT work on giant spiders, please stop asking me to cast it on them
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Sep 26, 2014 16:36
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you kick open the door and surprise three jews, greedily counting their gold. They reach for their flint circumcision knives.
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Sep 26, 2014 16:39
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i throw a cursed -3 thoroughly rusted dart
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Sep 26, 2014 16:44
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GrrrlSweatshirt posted:i throw a cursed -3 thoroughly rusted dart The first jew dodges and comes at you with the knife. Save vs. Bris.
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Sep 26, 2014 16:45
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| # ? Apr 23, 2024 22:05 |
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i rolled a 2 i knew i should have put at least a point into my dart skill before i spent all of my money on these 800 cursed -3 thoroughly rusty darts
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Sep 26, 2014 16:50
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