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I have a healthy libido and like to get off at least twice a day. Lately ive been having this problem where when I ejaculate my left testicle retracts up into my abdomen. It doesn't happen every time and it usually slowly recedes back into position but sometimes I have to manually work it back in and its incredibly painful is this a common problem am I going to die?
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Sep 24, 2014 03:59
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yes.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:00
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yes
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Sep 24, 2014 04:01
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Yes. Make out a will.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:01
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no
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Sep 24, 2014 04:01
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Pics or it didn't happen.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:02
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no its not common or no im not going to die
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Sep 24, 2014 04:03
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no its not common but yes you're going to die sorry op
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Sep 24, 2014 04:03
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A) A sorcerer is stealing your penis but is still a bit of a newbie so he's starting with just that testicle. B) You're becoming a woman. Enjoy your periods, bitch.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:03
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Your testicle is trying to become an ovary. Embrace it. You are becoming the superior sex
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Sep 24, 2014 04:04
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my left gonad's gone and left me
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Sep 24, 2014 04:04
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to be fair I don't need them any more
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Sep 24, 2014 04:05
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You're already dead, in here with us.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:09
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That's pretty much what they're supposed to do, but if it's actually going up into your abdomen read this: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/retractile-testicle/basics/causes/con-20024856
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Sep 24, 2014 04:10
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better consult The Goon Doctor subforum op
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Sep 24, 2014 04:10
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It means you are a woman.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:10
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that's just your testicle reloading for the next volley
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Sep 24, 2014 04:10
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cinch the top of your nutsack closed with a ziptie, problem solved no need to thank me
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Sep 24, 2014 04:11
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I would go to a doctor but I don't have the time for that poo poo
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Sep 24, 2014 04:18
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mookface posted:I would go to a doctor but I don't have the time for that poo poo
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Sep 24, 2014 04:20
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a hole-y ghost posted:it might be testicle torsion so you should probably actually find time maybe he could look at my rear end in a top hat that occasionally bleeds
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Sep 24, 2014 04:20
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ziptie it shut
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Sep 24, 2014 04:22
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Basically it sounds like your real problem is your right testicle, which ought to be retracting along with its brother. I hate to be the one to break the bad news, but lazy ball is generally related to tissue death. Try punching yourself in the balls to see if the right one doesn't hurt. Failing that, just punch yourself in the balls because you're stupid and no one loves you.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:22
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mookface posted:maybe he could look at my rear end in a top hat that occasionally bleeds I will look at your rear end in a top hat e-mail me at trunks1992@hotmail.com
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Sep 24, 2014 04:23
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is this from masturbation or sex with a real human person?
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Sep 24, 2014 04:23
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also nut up and shut up
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Sep 24, 2014 04:23
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Republican Vampire posted:Basically it sounds like your real problem is your right testicle, which ought to be retracting along with its brother. sounds a little unorthodox but at this point I'll try anything Noblesse Obliged posted:is this from masturbation or sex with a real human person? Both
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Sep 24, 2014 04:24
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mookface posted:sounds a little unorthodox but at this point I'll try anything Basically once your scrote is the consistency of ground beef you're reached level two and will probably be able to pass through closed doors by yanking the joystick down twice.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:25
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What's your inseam?
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Sep 24, 2014 04:27
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This could merely be a case of poor tailoring.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:28
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actually humans used to have the ability to retract genitals but that ability was slowly phased out as we got less hairy and started wearing clothes. rock on brother. you will die tomorrow
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Sep 24, 2014 04:31
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I don't have any medical advice, I just wanted to post my well wishes for your errant testicle.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:34
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text me, I'll get that bugger outta there
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Sep 24, 2014 04:34
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mookface posted:no its not common or no im not going to die yes
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Sep 24, 2014 04:35
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twit666 posted:What's your inseam? 32
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Sep 24, 2014 04:38
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a hole-y ghost posted:it might be testicle torsion so you should probably actually find time I saw a story once where a teenager was staying over at a friend's house, and his friend thought it would be funny to do that wrestling move where you come up behind someone, stick your arm between their legs, and slam your arm up into their crotch. Later that night he woke up in excruciating pain and they rushed him to the hospital. He had torsion in both testicles and they had to be removed. In the later lawsuit where the victim's family was trying to get money out of the other family's insurance, the court ruled the insurance didn't have to cover it because the act was intentional. Sucks for him. I hope he has some good revenge plans cooked up.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:40
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but yeah if you happen to be talking to a doctor just casually ask if he knows how to check for testicle torsion and slip his hand into your pants
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Sep 24, 2014 04:40
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Hey OP, ive got an option for you. Go talk to a doctor.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:41
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Maybe take a break for a while OP
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Sep 24, 2014 04:41
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I'm not gonna lie, I've definitely had testicle problems. One time I got my mom to drive me to a doctor's office in the middle of the night because of one (by one I mean a testicle problem), and it was pretty drat embarrassing. (I don't think the nurse had ever seen circumcised penis before  ). Turned out to be totally stress related, because I had a huge assignment in 11th grade history due and I had a few hours to craft my essay. Stress can do insane things to your body that you thought it had no power over.
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Sep 24, 2014 04:43
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