Top City Homo posted:

Agrajag posted:

how can no one have posted this yet? what a bunch of gay losers.

hackbunny posted:

the abortion machine was like the only scene that belonged in an Alien prequel, not coincidentally the only funny scene

Effectronica posted:

Yeah, whatever, cool gif+sexy lady, but anyways, it's disgusting that there are still people out there (like my now ex-girlfriend) who refuse to acknowledge how lovely Prometheus was, and how much it ruined the Alien movies retrospectively. I don't know why I paid to see Epimetheus in theaters four times just to bathe in how bad it was, but I did, and it's awful, and I don't believe anyone actually likes it.

Effectronica posted:

Yeah, whatever, cool gif+sexy lady, but anyways, it's disgusting that there are still people out there (like my now ex-girlfriend) who refuse to acknowledge how lovely Prometheus was, and how much it ruined the Alien movies retrospectively. I don't know why I paid to see Epimetheus in theaters four times just to bathe in how bad it was, but I did, and it's awful, and I don't believe anyone actually likes it.

Depressing Drawers posted:

The cinematography was good, some set pieces were decent, and fassbender was pretty good in it.

But then the plot, character behavior and writing were abysmal.

Effectronica posted:

Yeah, whatever, cool gif+sexy lady, but anyways, it's disgusting that there are still people out there (like my now ex-girlfriend) who refuse to acknowledge how lovely Prometheus was, and how much it ruined the Alien movies retrospectively. I don't know why I paid to see Epimetheus in theaters four times just to bathe in how bad it was, but I did, and it's awful, and I don't believe anyone actually likes it.

Agrajag posted:

good thing it wasn't an alien prequel movie

im pooping! posted:

so was charles theron a robot or what?

Zazi posted:

No its... Its pretty bad op. Sorry.

Neurolimal posted:

movie was bad, rapace should be playing wonder woman instead of gal godot

idk what else there is to say

naem posted:

I think you guys overrate the original alien movies.

The first had a spooky vibe that made it seem intelligent but it was ultimately just a good monster movie.

Aliens was literally a micheal bay style shoot em up and was hokey as all heck, way worse than Prometheus honestly. It was also great fun.

Mange Mite posted:

you know what wasn't good or fun? prometheus. just pointing out the key difference here for your analysis

hackbunny posted:

nice fig leaf bro, instant "slam-dunk" against criticism

but it is and it is massively inferior. not funny, not scary and fake deep

Effectronica posted:

Well, I showed her.

MajorB posted:

There's a lot of funny things about Prometheus hate; a lot of it has to do with dumb internet that's-not-how-my-space-voyage-to-find-god-would-go posturing. The history of human exploration is riddled with mistakes and accidents. The film goes out of its way to point out that the person responsible for hiring the personnel is the one person who rightly thinks that the trip is a Bad Idea, and absolutely none of the crew knew what mission they were being hired for. And with multiple countries recently proving that people who should know better (like nurses) are very susceptible to getting themselves exposed to infectious materials, the scenario presented in Prometheus (at least from the perspective of how the humans handled the trip) is not actually far-fetched at all.

I think another big problem with the film was that they announced that it was an Alien prequel before they even had a solid idea of what the movie was going to be. Ridley Scott's decision to cut the too-familiar "Xenomorph" out almost entirely was probably the best one he made concerning the film (his quote that he couldn't take it seriously after seeing it in a ride at Disney is very telling), but by that point everyone was already expecting an Alien. What Ridley really wanted to do was go back to the well that sprung Alien: schlocky b-movies where a bunch of scientists talk about heady themes while being killed off one by one by a lame-looking monster. In fact, Alien was critically viewed as derivative at the time. It's important to remember that the '79 Alien was an unofficial remake of 1958's It! The Terror from Beyond Space, a movie that is actually tonally far closer to Prometheus than Alien. When the filmmakers said they wanted to "go back to Alien's DNA" they were talking both chronologically as a prequel and tonally\aesthetically. You wouldn't have known this at all from the trailers, which made Prometheus look like a scary movie heavily connected to Alien.

So Prometheus is this bizarre comedy-horror movie where the cast of a 50s B-movie thinks that they're in 2001: A Space Oddysey, but they're actually in Alien. I can't really blame people for being unhappy with it, but if you can't appreciate a movie that ends with "god" dying because he got raped in the face by a tentacle monster, and the only survivors are a strong-willed idiot (who's conflated her memories of her dad with her belief in god) who keeps herself sane by pretending the Christian god exists and a sociopathic robot who doesn't care because he has first-hand experience that his god didn't give a poo poo about him, you're probably gayer than I am.

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

I mean look at this.

look at this big gay post.

MajorB posted:

as opposed to your tiny gay post?