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Over the past month, I took a 30 day, 38-state tour of the US, visiting every region of the country and seeing most of America's big cities. During this trip, I learned a lot of things about America: mostly some areas of America are way more cool than others. From this, I decided to look at a tier system for America's city, coolness wise. There is a top tier of cities that are really cool and people who live in them become cool, just by osmosis. Then there are a host of cities that are not that cool, but that might have some cool parts, and that a cool person will actually remain cool in. Then there are a few benighted American cities that are just totally uncool and sap coolness out of people who visit them. Using my secret sauce ranking system, I've determined the tiers: please feel free to argue with me. 1. New York City. Being the biggest city would usually count against it, since a certain amount of coolness comes with size. But even given its size, NYC is cooler than it should be. Its diverse, has great arts and culture, there is always something to do, and pretty much every literary or musical movement in America was developed there. 2. Seattle-Portland-Denver. The triad of smallish, modern cities in the West. Some people might think that them being twee/yuppie/white counts against them, and it does, but also they have a marked lack of boring depressing rust belt bullshit to deal with. Also, you can smoke weed in 2 of the 3 and soon in all 3. 3. San Francisco Bay area. Full of techies and yuppies and other self-important people currently, but also historically one of America's wilder cities, and a very diverse place. Setting aside the occasional smugness, this area is cool. 4. New Orleans. Poor, dirty, hot, humid, part of the oppressive, backwards south...but still a cool place to live. No one has ever said that New Orleans lacks character Places that are neither cool or uncool: 1. Boston: the coolest of the uncool, Boston is an academic center, a pretty nice place, and a literary city, but it lacks that certain something. 2. Chicago: if Chicago was smaller, it would have to be cool, just based on the amount of art and architecture and cultural diversity. But Chicago is America's third or fourth biggest city, so its coolness is just expected. 3. Atlanta: Maybe the coolest city in the South, but that isn't saying much. 4. Minneapolis-St. Paul: Generally a pleasant place to live, with nothing objectionable about it, but a bit too corn fed and wholesome. 5. Every other city in the Midwest: Milwaukee, Indianapolis, Cleveland, Detroit...well, you can tread water there, I guess? 6. Every other city on the East Coast: If you are already in Philadelphia, why not just move to New York? Answer: because you aren't cool. 7. Los Angeles: this one is pretty troublesome. LA is a media center, but its mostly meant to create media for the middlest of middle America. But just based on its size, there is quite a scene there, and it does certainly have diversity. On balance, LA is not particularly cool, though. Places that will suck out your coolness: 1. Washington, D.C.: a city mostly full of government people. Enough said? 2. Anywhere in Texas: Texas. (exceptions: San Antonio/Austin, which I haven't visited) 3. St. Louis: Pretty much got here after Ferguson 4. Any city in the deep south that isn't Atlanta: Birmingham, Little Rock, Oklahoma City, etc. BORING 5. Phoenix: literally and figuratively America's least cool city. There are a couple of cities I haven't been to (Miami and San Diego) that I would live help placing, and a few people might hold exception to where I placed some cities, but I think we can come to consensus on this.
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Oct 19, 2014 23:47
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 05:44 |
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Cairo
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Oct 19, 2014 23:49
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boston is pretty cool and should not be on the uncool list
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Oct 19, 2014 23:51
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I agree with your top 3 although i haven't been to Denver. Hopefully going to New Orleans this time next year (along with other places) so i'll get back to you about that one. Have heard Austin is pretty cool from texans that hate texas (p much the only cool place in their eyes).
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Oct 19, 2014 23:51
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Robbie Fowler posted:I agree with your top 3 although i haven't been to Denver. I actually don't know if it is fair to compare Austin with big cities. In my mind, there are cool college or resort towns, but you can't really compare Madison or Eugene or Burlington against big cities where people actually do things. Austin is kind of a college town and kind of a real city, so I didn't know what to do with it. (Also I've never been there)
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Oct 19, 2014 23:54
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Cloud City
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Oct 19, 2014 23:55
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Ratjaculation posted:Cloud City While its inclusion of a black mayor, and its willingness to buck imperial power, are both cool, Cloud City is not in America.
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Oct 19, 2014 23:58
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glowing-fish posted:While its inclusion of a black mayor, and its willingness to buck imperial power, are both cool, Cloud City is not in America. it can't be true *lets go of ledge, falls*
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Oct 20, 2014 00:01
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the south is actually tolerable during winter
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Oct 20, 2014 00:01
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Ratjaculation posted:Cairo :iamafag:
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Oct 20, 2014 00:02
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DC is higher tier than the bay area since piles of jobs like politics, law and non-profits means it has more single women. lmao, it's the lamest opinion to knock DC since it's a boring place filled with government worker.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:08
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Baltimore is the greatest city in America
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Oct 20, 2014 00:10
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isn't nyc full of pretentious wankers though op?
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Oct 20, 2014 00:11
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EXTREME INSERTION posted:Baltimore is the greatest city in America Well if you can't afford rent in DC and many of the neighborhoods look just like DC to the point that it was used for House of Cards.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:11
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Ratjaculation posted:isn't nyc full of pretentious wankers though op? Yes but more like self-styled masters of the universe who think that the world basically ends at the Hudson River. It's really hard to believe but in spite of them NYC is still really cool. It's pretty much an exclusive city for the rich now though. Boston can suck my cock. The university city atmosphere is nice in some ways because the average citizen is less likely to be a dumbass, but it's cold and grey and very elitist in a way that seems quaint after coming from NYC and surprisingly racist.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:14
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glowing-fish posted:
 glowing-fish posted:twee/yuppie/white depressing bullshit weed 
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Oct 20, 2014 00:15
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San Diego is kind of a weird one. It's a Southen Californian city without any of the lovely aspects of LA, and it has the best weather in America. However, it kinda lacks any sort of real culture. Comic Con is here though which is rad.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:21
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Fetus Tree posted:boston is pretty cool and should not be on the uncool list  it's ok to be overlooked by tourists, too many one way streets anyways
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Oct 20, 2014 00:21
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glowing-fish posted:I actually don't know if it is fair to compare Austin with big cities. In my mind, there are cool college or resort towns, but you can't really compare Madison or Eugene or Burlington against big cities where people actually do things. Austin is kind of a college town and kind of a real city, so I didn't know what to do with it. (Also I've never been there)
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Oct 20, 2014 00:22
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Henker posted:San Diego is kind of a weird one. It's a Southen Californian city without any of the lovely aspects of LA, and it has the best weather in America. However, it kinda lacks any sort of real culture. Comic Con is here though which is rad. Yeah it has a lazy beach town feel and pretty empty downtown.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:24
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Henker posted:San Diego is kind of a weird one. It's a Southen Californian city without any of the lovely aspects of LA, and it has the best weather in America. However, it kinda lacks any sort of real culture. Comic Con is here though which is rad. yeah its super weird and just beige. and right next to mexico
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Oct 20, 2014 00:25
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san diego has culture you just have to be rich to appreciate its strip mall deco
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Oct 20, 2014 00:26
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In all fairness DC and SF are too career orientated now to be considered cool IMO
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Oct 20, 2014 00:31
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mind the walrus posted:Boston can suck my cock. The university city atmosphere is nice in some ways because the average citizen is less likely to be a dumbass, but it's cold and grey and very elitist in a way that seems quaint after coming from NYC and surprisingly racist. Like i said, boston is pretty cool
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Oct 20, 2014 00:32
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etalian posted:In all fairness DC and SF are too career orientated now to be considered cool IMO I put "San Francisco Bay Area", so including San Jose, Oakland and everything in-between.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:34
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etalian posted:Yeah it has a lazy beach town feel and pretty empty downtown. Downtown San Diego, empty? Uh........... Downtown LA is the empty one. Theres literally nothing but office buildings (little tokyo is cool i guess)
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Oct 20, 2014 00:34
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All cities are fail
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Oct 20, 2014 00:38
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all cities are all cool and uncool in a variety of ways.... you might say they are a land of contrasts
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Oct 20, 2014 00:39
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Chinatown posted:Downtown San Diego, empty? Uh........... What about Chinatown?
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Oct 20, 2014 00:39
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lmao according to rich dad magazine Forbes: http://www.forbes.com/sites/morganbrennan/2012/07/26/houston-tops-our-list-of-americas-coolest-cities-to-live/ 1. Houston 2. DC 3. LA 4. Dallas 5. Seattle 6. San Diego 7. Boston 8. Orange County 9. SF 10. NYC 11. San Antonio 12. Chicago 13. Fort Worth 14. Baltimore 15. Philadelphia 16. Oakland 17. Bethesda 18. Minneapolis 19. Austin 20. Denver
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Oct 20, 2014 00:43
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etalian posted:lmao according to rich dad magazine Forbes: there isn't enough charlotte, nc on this list to be considered a serious dad list
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Oct 20, 2014 00:45
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orange county? lol
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Oct 20, 2014 00:45
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Chinatown posted:Downtown San Diego, empty? Uh........... Umm have you been to LA?
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Oct 20, 2014 00:46
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Cleveland is an excellent tourist destination. Visit Cleveland! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysmLA5TqbIY http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZzgAjjuqZM
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Oct 20, 2014 00:46
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tldr, voted 1 "We threw your vote into the pile."
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Oct 20, 2014 00:48
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Chinatown posted:Downtown San Diego, empty? Uh........... Lol have you been to downtown la? Pretty hopping
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Oct 20, 2014 00:48
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Bip Roberts posted:Umm have you been to LA? Yeah I drive all over it for work. Its poo poo m8.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:49
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glowing-fish posted:I actually don't know if it is fair to compare Austin with big cities. In my mind, there are cool college or resort towns, but you can't really compare Madison or Eugene or Burlington against big cities where people actually do things. Austin is kind of a college town and kind of a real city, so I didn't know what to do with it. (Also I've never been there) I kinda prefer mid-sized cities to 10-million-plus metro cities anyway. Denver is just about the perfect size for a city, IMO. Maybe it would get my vote but honestly if Denver were in the middle of Missouri without the Rockies nearby to give it a boost, it'd probably be seen as less cool than Minneapolis on its own merits. Eh gently caress it I'll vote for it. Geography counts.
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Oct 20, 2014 00:50
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I think sf is cool but the fact that its so expensive + earthquake prone and smelly makes me not want to live there
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Oct 20, 2014 00:54
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 05:44 |
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You know it's not a cool city if the first question you get from a new person is "Where do you work?"
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Oct 20, 2014 00:57
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