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orangesampson
Nov 22, 2012

by Ion Helmet
Irish spring soap is the best soap, Vo5, best shampoo. Clean behind your ears you idiot.

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BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Brush your teeth even if no one is looking

Jesus Christ
Jun 1, 2000

mods if you can make this my avatar I will gladly pay 10bux to the coffers
don't forget to wash your taint

gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005
toothe paste and jizz is jizz paste

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

i use the same soap for my hair and body and i really only scrub the gross parts (armpits and butt/taint/penor)

i have beautiful skin

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Use dog shampoo whenever available

Samuel L. ACKSYN
Feb 29, 2008


let me tell you about my incredibly complex shaving routine that costs me hours of time and hundreds of dollars just so i can pretend i'm manly for doing it this way

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

i shave my face once a week and i do not "manscape"

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Burn all body hair off with an oxyacetylene torch held at the proper distance. Use a friend

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob
hello gene :)

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord
Some pro tips

-Save on water & toilet paper. Instead of pissing away money on TP and the water bill, take movements in morning, and keep tub filled with water and just bathe self in tub water each morning (possibly evenings too depending on how much activity one has during the day...this is more for the OCD types though).

-Use one brush for everything. Pretty big scam going on where people flush their hard earned cash on individual brushes for each body part. Save time, and money, and use same brush for everything.

-Waste nothing. Cum has a musky scent, and can be used as a great aphrodisiac. Sweat too, is a natural aphrodisiac in some cultures.

A Tin Of Beans
Nov 25, 2013

mouthwash

orangesampson
Nov 22, 2012

by Ion Helmet
Reason why toilets in america are sold without bidets is because the toilet paper industry would go under over night, nothing like a 83% stream of water to wash of the taint.

Japan got something right.

i hate everything
Oct 15, 2010

orangesampson posted:

Clean behind your ears you idiot.

And ruin all the free feta? Nice try Monsanto.

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005
floss

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Rub igneous rocks all over your arms and legs in a glacier fed river

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005
don't forget the loving sunscreen

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Rub ashes on your face to ward of evil spirits

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005

mookface posted:

Rub ashes on your face to ward of evil spirits

cigarette, cigar, or pipe?

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy

Poetic Justice posted:

cigarette, cigar, or pipe?

smudge of sagebrush obviously

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

wash u rear end

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/06/koolaid-maroney-wants-u-to-wash-u-rear end.html

Portals
Apr 18, 2012

shower daily and use deoderant, even if you're not going outside today

Electric Charity
Mar 22, 2009
good lord,

cleanse my gunt

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

the only difference between irish spring and regular soap is it smells terrible

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Electric Charity
Mar 22, 2009
then what is beer soap, if its made from stout?

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