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HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
There I was, waiting in line at the store, when the man in front of me goes into his front pocket to produce his wallet. I was astounded, I just stood there staring in disbelief. Only with the cashier's call of "Next please" could I snap out of it. A front pocket wallet user, in this day and age...

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No. 6
Jun 30, 2002

Front pocket is best pocket.

bing_commander
Aug 14, 2009

In other news..
if you sit on your wallet all the time youre going to ruin all the hundred dollar bills and condoms

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?
Have fun getting your wallet stolen out of you back pocket. Also I don't like sitting on my wallet.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:

No. 6 posted:

Front pocket is best pocket.

Front pockets are very useful for limited consumables and inconsiderable objects. A wallet is neither of these.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:

bing_commander posted:

if you sit on your wallet all the time youre going to ruin all the hundred dollar bills and condoms

If you keep excessive amounts of money in your wallet, you are missing the entire point of a wallet.

Chumbawumba4ever97
Dec 31, 2000

by Fluffdaddy
Yes let me just sit on 3 credit cards, ATM card, cash, health insurance/hospital ID card, pop's police badge, PBA cards, work ID card, driver's/CDL license and my wallet itself; sounds really comfortable pause not -Borat 2006

BASF
Jun 16, 2011

by Ralp
Front pocket crew represent! The blacks always come at you from behind.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:

Three Olives posted:

Have fun getting your wallet stolen out of you back pocket. Also I don't like sitting on my wallet.

A back pocket is safer for many reasons - back pockets generally have some sort of button or clasp with which to safeguard their contents, it is on an area of the body that is generally regarded as a societal faux pas, meaning less chance of someone placing their hand there, plus a person is more acutely aware of any unexpected movement on their backside than their leg or hip.

Chumbawumba4ever97
Dec 31, 2000

by Fluffdaddy
What is your stance on wallets RE: cargo jort sidepockets.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
Again, if the contents of your wallet are vast and plentiful, you are misusing said wallet, and should consider a small man-bag to hold said contents.

Brexit the Frog
Aug 22, 2013

i do the front pocket. my gf says it makes my pants bulge out in unflattering ways but THERE'S THE DOOR DARLIN, if u can't handle me at my worst u don't deserve me at my best &c. &c.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:

Uncle at Nintendo posted:

What is your stance on wallets RE: cargo jort sidepockets.

Slouched and leaning to one side.

bing_commander
Aug 14, 2009

In other news..
microwalleter spotted

Shasta Orange Soda
Apr 25, 2007
drat i didn't know there were so many pocket rules, let me write these down

No. 6
Jun 30, 2002

Front left - phone
Front right - keys, slim wallet

That's it.

Barf Wight
Sep 4, 2011
OK, you can stop yelling :hf:

HJB posted:

A back pocket is safer for many reasons - back pockets generally have some sort of button or clasp with which to safeguard their contents, it is on an area of the body that is generally regarded as a societal faux pas, meaning less chance of someone placing their hand there, plus a person is more acutely aware of any unexpected movement on their backside than their leg or hip.

Here's a tip: pickpockets don't care about putting their hand on your big butt lump.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:

No. 6 posted:

Front left - phone
Front right - keys, slim wallet

That's it.

A phone is an acceptable front pocket item. I would be wary about keys, but they are acceptable for short distances or with the correct attachments. A wallet is an unacceptable front pocket item, slim or otherwise.

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009
lmao if u dont carry a satchel 24/7 and keep your phone keys and wallet in it

literally lmpio

serious lol if you carry anything in your pockets AT ALL except MAYBE a stick of gum

Brexit the Frog
Aug 22, 2013

No. 6 posted:

Front left - phone
Front right - keys, slim wallet

That's it.

Front left - keys
Front right - phone, slim wallet

we're not so different after all, you and me

Hulebr00670065006e
Apr 20, 2010
How can you be so wrong :psyduck:

Front pocket for lyfe

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:

Oberleutnant posted:

lmao if u dont carry a satchel 24/7 and keep your phone keys and wallet in it

literally lmpio

serious lol if you carry anything in your pockets AT ALL except MAYBE a stick of gum

This is a safe and acceptable compromise.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?
What if I use Apple Pay™ can I keep my phone in my front pocket?

Indy
Mar 30, 2005

Hey guys, what's up?

HJB posted:

A back pocket is safer for many reasons - back pockets generally have some sort of button or clasp with which to safeguard their contents, it is on an area of the body that is generally regarded as a societal faux pas, meaning less chance of someone placing their hand there, plus a person is more acutely aware of any unexpected movement on their backside than their leg or hip.

Back pocket, thief sees my wallet, I dont see thief.
Front pocket, thief sees my wallet, I see thief.
Which one was safer again? Also you are an idiot if you sit on your wallet... Idiot.

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009
"hmm yess i'll keep all of these rigid, bulky and/or pointed metal objects in the pockets of my trousers all day so i can never sit comfortably for more than 5 minutes and have unsightly bulges all the time in the year 2014"
- a loving retarded troglodyte

Whorelord
May 1, 2013

Jump into the well...

why the gently caress do you actually care about where people keep their wallets are you some kind of fascist I don't get it

Dave Concepcion
Mar 19, 2012
i literally don't know a single person who uses the back pocket for anything who isn't a dad

bing_commander
Aug 14, 2009

In other news..
i cant have a wallet messing up my butt profile

Motherfucker
Jul 16, 2011

I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.
look at this loving human being with a fat man wallet.

Shasta Orange Soda
Apr 25, 2007
maybe its not so bad sitting on your wallet if you have a gigantic fat rear end that can just absorb the bulk of the wallet, but otherwise it's not very comfortable

Dave Concepcion
Mar 19, 2012
the venn diagram of people who puts their wallet in their back pocket, people who wears white socks with anything other than athletic gear, and people who own wolf shirts is just one circle

Unknowable Hole
Feb 2, 2005


Pillbug
It is very important that the view of my rear end remains unobstructed.

Dave Concepcion
Mar 19, 2012
the only acceptable use of a back pocket is to hang a color coded handkerchief from to inform other faggots of your sexual preferences

School Nickname
Apr 23, 2010

*fffffff-fffaaaaaaarrrtt*
:ussr:
OP is dumb and retarded. Back-pocket antics are what you do in your teens.

bing_commander posted:

i cant have a wallet messing up my butt profile

CAMP FARTING ROCKS
Jan 14, 2005

I put my keys in my back pocket will I be okay?

[edit] define 'front pocket'. Do you just mean side pockets? Or do you mean like literal, on the front of the thigh pockets like girls have?

revmoo
May 25, 2006

#basta

Oberleutnant posted:

lmao if u dont carry a satchel 24/7 and keep your phone keys and wallet in it

literally lmpio

serious lol if you carry anything in your pockets AT ALL except MAYBE a stick of gum

Glad it works for you, but I'm not a lady.

jBrereton
May 30, 2013
Grimey Drawer
Best way to not get robbed, hth OP.

cheese sandwich
Feb 9, 2009

If I put my wallet in my back pocket where am I supposed to carry my comb

Gotta keep that pomp lookin tight

School Nickname
Apr 23, 2010

*fffffff-fffaaaaaaarrrtt*
:ussr:
Best way to not get robbed is to wear skinny jeans or be fat. Both options have accompanying risks. You still need the front pocket.

You don't want people to think you have rear end cancer or something, OP

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Buck Turgidson
Feb 6, 2011

𓀬𓀠𓀟𓀡𓀢𓀣𓀤𓀥𓀞𓀬
This is you OP:

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