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I cant believe hes going to report me for this:  im like stressing out here, they seriously cant fire me over this can they?
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Nov 12, 2014 20:28
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jigglemaster7 posted:I cant believe hes going to report me for this: maybe
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Nov 12, 2014 20:29
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still not as good as the girl who found her goon boyfriend's jizz bottle
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Nov 12, 2014 20:29
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Tell HR you peed in a bottle so that you weren't walking to the bathroom on company time in an effort to save the company money and increase your productivity. They'll likely give you a promotion.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:29
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Why did you even have one of these?
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Nov 12, 2014 20:30
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your piss looks strangely refreshing
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Nov 12, 2014 20:30
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depends are u in SV or not?
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Nov 12, 2014 20:30
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Uncle at Nintendo posted:Tell HR you peed in a bottle so that you weren't walking to the bathroom on company time in an effort to save the company money and increase your productivity. They'll likely give you a promotion. Exactly. Lawyer up and remember its not a "piss bottle" its a "trucker bomb" urbandictionary posted:A plastic container (could be a milk jug or a water bottle) that a trucker pisses in while he is driving his truck. Then he throws it out of the window so that he does not have to stop to relieve the call of nature. Can also be a plastic bag and feces may be involved. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=trucker+bomb
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Nov 12, 2014 20:30
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thegalagakid posted:Why did you even have one of these? hes leveraging a core utilization for productivity and connectivity
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Nov 12, 2014 20:31
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Nice broom.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:32
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my pits are sweating to much
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Nov 12, 2014 20:32
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Disruptive productivity boosting innovation
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Nov 12, 2014 20:33
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Jiggled again
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Nov 12, 2014 20:34
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Lucky Guy posted:hes leveraging a core utilization for productivity and connectivity yeah just start saying this OP. They love buzzwords like this and you'll probably come out on top. seriously though whats the reason for this, what is too hard about walking to the restroom and peeing, all while being paid to do it
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Nov 12, 2014 20:35
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See if they will buy you a catheter. More productivity and more hygienic.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:36
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Avocados posted:yeah just start saying this OP. They love buzzwords like this and you'll probably come out on top. i didnt feel like getting up tbh. i took the pic like last week when i actually pissed in the bottle. my coworker found the bottle today and is threatening to report me.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:37
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followup question: why did you keep it around for a week?
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Nov 12, 2014 20:39
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be honest, op--you just pissed in that bottle to post this thread. i know the look of fresh bottle piss when i see it e: nevermind...drink it so there's no proof
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Nov 12, 2014 20:40
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jigglemaster7 posted:i didnt feel like getting up tbh. i took the pic like last week when i actually pissed in the bottle. my coworker found the bottle today and is threatening to report me. You should be fired because you're dumb as hell, piss bottle or not.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:40
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BeefThief posted:be honest, op--you just pissed in that bottle to post this thread. i know the look of fresh bottle piss when i see it i took the pic when it was fresh because i thought it looked particularly refreshing
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Nov 12, 2014 20:41
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Say its not piss, but some home made apple cider. Then chug the lot on the spot to show them.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:41
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lol if you do not jarate your HR boss and crit him with your bushwacka
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Nov 12, 2014 20:41
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Should've taken the easier way out and said you'd smuggled some beer in, OP.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:41
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Regalingualius posted:Should've taken the easier way out and said you'd smuggled some beer in, OP. edit: nvm
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Nov 12, 2014 20:44
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it's the way of the road boss
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Nov 12, 2014 20:46
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jigglemaster7 posted:edit: nvm Lol 2nd thoughts on that one huh?
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Nov 12, 2014 20:46
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allowing your pissbottle to be discovered easily is poor form, OP. you'll never make it in your career without demonstrating correct pissing technique
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Nov 12, 2014 20:46
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Better to be known as "that dumbass who got caught bringing booze to work" than "that goon who pissed in a bottle (and maybe then drank it)".
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Nov 12, 2014 20:46
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jigglemaster7
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Nov 12, 2014 20:47
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The only answer is to find HR's pissbottles, and blackmail them into ignoring the report. Edit: Alternately, you can fill a few pissbottles, and hide them in HR, and let them fight it out between themselves. As long as you do that before you get reported, they will then begin to believe they have a serial pisser, and you are merely another innocent victim. Panamaniac fucked around with this message at 20:50 on Nov 12, 2014 |
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Nov 12, 2014 20:47
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i think the consensus is that you want to build your piss bottle collection for a while before having anybody discover it
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Nov 12, 2014 20:52
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loving normies, always judging us...why can't they just let us live in peace? Unsheath your katana, OP
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Nov 12, 2014 20:54
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Ron Paul Hype Man posted:The only answer is to find HR's pissbottles, and blackmail them into ignoring the report. Nah, they'd figure out pretty fast that OP's was from before the sudden outbreak of pissbottles, and figure it out from there. OP, your only hope left at this point is to tell your friend you were just making GBS threads around, and it's actually booze. Be prepared to have to chug it down to prove it; if you can't, drink a bit, dramatically puke it up, and go on about how it really did taste like horse piss. Don't do that latter bit if you know he's drunken horse piss before, obviously.
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Nov 12, 2014 20:58
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a piss bottle has more use in the home than at work
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Nov 12, 2014 20:59
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Nonsense posted:still not as good as the girl who found her goon boyfriend's jizz bottle Probably my favorite story from here that I've ever read. Dely Apple posted:lol if you do not jarate your HR boss and crit him with your bushwacka
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Nov 12, 2014 21:04
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 take a picture drinking from your obviously apple juice?
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Nov 12, 2014 21:05
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Tell HR that it's actually your co-worker's piss bottle, and that when you voiced your objection to it your co-worker said that he/she would lie to HR to get you in trouble. You also might want to hurry up and piss in another bottle and stash it near your co-worker's desk so you can point it out to HR. loving snitch deserves to be unemployed.
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Nov 12, 2014 21:07
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poo poo in a lunchbox and plant it on your coworker. Report your coworker to HR before her reports you.
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Nov 12, 2014 21:11
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jiggled again
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Nov 12, 2014 21:12
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 09:56 |
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tell him its iced tea
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Nov 12, 2014 21:16
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