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Starving Autist
Oct 20, 2007

by Ralp

paranoid randroid posted:

i went to college with the daughter of the guy who owns salon. he showed up to graduation stoned and smoked weed in teh audience. anyhoo thats my brush with mediocrity story, thanx for reading.

He sounds cool.

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Big Bowie Bonanza
Dec 30, 2007

please tell me where i can date this cute boy
http://www.salon.com/2014/11/22/the_real_jfk_mystery_50_years_later_why_the_infamous_murder_must_be_reinvestigated/

The real JFK mystery, 50 years later: Why the infamous murder must be reinvestigated

lol jesus loving christ salon

Big Bowie Bonanza
Dec 30, 2007

please tell me where i can date this cute boy
also wasnt the 50 year anniversary of jfk's death last year

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

Yes but they'll whine a technicality on how "50 years later" can mean a general expression of "50 years or more later" instead of admitting that their title is poo poo.

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*
"Boy, I sure wish I were Huffington Post or Buzzfeed"

Drfishback
Nov 5, 2009
Falling in mall fountains,are you at risk?: shocking cell phone facts exposed

ziasquinn
Jan 1, 2006

Fallen Rib
My favorite part of the fat chicks salon article is the sentence "I wanted to tell my husband not to patronize the store"

Like, I know that patronize means, but I also know how it's used: sarcastically. Not literally. CHRIST

Jerry Steinfeld
Dec 25, 2012
im a stupid poo poo with daddy issues, lemme write this cracked-ish clickbait 5 Reasons Why Oogling Women is Wrong

Alright tomorrow I gotta get that 750000 Reasons Why it's OK to Oogle Hot Dudes is OK article done

Benny Harvey
Nov 24, 2012

mind the walrus posted:

Yes but they'll whine a technicality on how "50 years later" can mean a general expression of "50 years or more later" instead of admitting that their title is poo poo.

In the under-headline, it says "on the 50th anniversary".

PixieDreamGirl
Apr 29, 2014

2014; The year I whored myself out for title changes.

Yo, I don't care what y'all do,how y'all do or where y'all do it, just keep it gangsta and never pay for an av change, have someone else do it- Ya boy Pixie
I didn't know what we were talking about, took one look at the website and lost what little faith I already had in journalism.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*

PixieDreamGirl posted:

I didn't know what we were talking about, took one look at the website and lost what little faith I already had in journalism.



Well of course it'd be the happiest days of her life, she's shooting up loving heroin :psyduck:

catpowerd
Jan 9, 2008

swinging your guitar around
Cause they wanted to hear that meow

PixieDreamGirl posted:

I didn't know what we were talking about, took one look at the website and lost what little faith I already had in journalism.



Hahaha christ.

opus111
Jul 6, 2014

PixieDreamGirl posted:

I didn't know what we were talking about, took one look at the website and lost what little faith I already had in journalism.



lmfao

King of Bleh
Mar 3, 2007

A kingdom of rats.

PixieDreamGirl posted:

I didn't know what we were talking about, took one look at the website and lost what little faith I already had in journalism.



I had to go to the site because I didn't actually believe this was real; it is

Setzer Gabbiani
Oct 13, 2004

https://twitter.com/salondotcom

Harime Nui
Apr 15, 2008

The New Insincerity

Noyemi K posted:

Well of course it'd be the happiest days of her life, she's shooting up loving heroin :psyduck:

Anais Nun
Apr 21, 2010
I wasted Mom and Dad's money on a MFA in Creative Writing despite the fact that I have always been a really mediocre writer. Harken to my overwrought prose about the size of my thighs and what chub-rub says about the post modern millenial Zeitgeist in Obama's America. (If this doesn't get accepted to Salon then I'll prob just add a grimy bathroom-mirror selfie and submit to Xojane.)

babypolis
Nov 4, 2009

mods pls change my name to "heroin dad"

down with slavery
Dec 23, 2013
STOP QUOTING MY POSTS SO PEOPLE THAT AREN'T IDIOTS DON'T HAVE TO READ MY FUCKING TERRIBLE OPINIONS THANKS

City of Tampa posted:

I love the articles where a really fat woman dresses strangely and does strange things in public, and secretly photographs random people walking by her that might be making a disapproving face (or might just be sneezing or doing anything else in the 1/1000 of a second that he picture was taken) and then she blames it on how much they hate fats.

Here is one, this could be an onion article:

http://www.salon.com/2014/11/13/capturing_a_strangers_sneer_what_happened_when_i_put_on_spandex/

gently caress anyone who blames being fat on hyperthyroidism

Smug Mug
Jul 21, 2011



holy poo poo this site is for real?

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*

Smug Mug posted:



holy poo poo this site is for real?

unfortunately they're playing you man; it's time to sever

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

Shasta Orange Soda posted:

Does the GOP winning the midterm elections prove that the GOP is finally dead?

I lolled at the angst over the midterm results.

Maybe if the left went out to vote instead of being butthurt over the Obama failure/having a crying party about evil conservatives they might have gotten better results.

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

why would the left vote for democrats

babypolis
Nov 4, 2009

there is no american left. its been ground into dust after 60 years of relentless propaganda. all there is left in its place is a perpetual outrage machine over ultimately meaningless cultural issues

Hometown Slime Queen
Oct 26, 2004

the GOAT
I ended up on the floor rocking and crying today while the man behind the counter at Starbucks asked me if I was all right. Here are the reasons I WASN'T.

Who Is Paul Blart
Oct 22, 2010
I'm a fat idiot baby and I won't stop crying.

Who Is Paul Blart
Oct 22, 2010
Nvm

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

City of Tampa posted:

I love the articles where a really fat woman dresses strangely and does strange things in public, and secretly photographs random people walking by her that might be making a disapproving face (or might just be sneezing or doing anything else in the 1/1000 of a second that he picture was taken) and then she blames it on how much they hate fats.

Here is one, this could be an onion article:

http://www.salon.com/2014/11/13/capturing_a_strangers_sneer_what_happened_when_i_put_on_spandex/
iirc the camera isn't even hidden she just sets it up on a tripod then acts weird in front of it. Then when people look at the women filming herself she treats every glance as a personal attack.

Horniest Manticore
Nov 23, 2013

Hello, you!
Lipstick Apathy

QUEEN CAUCUS posted:

I ended up on the floor rocking and crying today while the man behind the counter at Starbucks asked me if I was all right. Here are the reasons I WASN'T.

1. He asked if I was all right. Doesn't he realize how loaded that word is? Not only is it clearly bad because it connotes conservatism, but it's also a slur against the left-handed community (and also a nanoaggression against feminism). Life would be so much easier if I were as ignorant as him.

Bruiser
Apr 4, 2007

by Shine
I broke up my marriage, and why you should too.

The 5th Foid
Nov 22, 2014

by Ralp
This oNe Teen says more about race relations with this one gesture than words can ever say.

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*
The tape that caused my marital meltdown

When I saw the two of them kissing, so passionate, I wanted to bring that back to our marriage. Boy, did I screw up

ElectricSheep
Jan 14, 2006

she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.
I had difficulties typing this article at my computer because my wrists are too limp, here is a list of reasons why I am marginalized in America

Jerry Mumphrey
Mar 11, 2004

by zen death robot

(and can't post for 4 years!)

quote:

Haley Morris-Cafiero is currently compiling a book of her images from the “Wait Watchers” series. To contribute to the Kickstarter fund, click here.

sry kids no christmas this year, papa had to give all his money to a fat idiot so she could make the worst book since mein kampf

Nut to Butt
Apr 13, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
:siren:MY VAGINA:siren:

The 5th Foid
Nov 22, 2014

by Ralp

Noyemi K posted:

The tape that caused my marital meltdown

When I saw the two of them kissing, so passionate, I wanted to bring that back to our marriage. Boy, did I screw up

i bet this ones real

sexy young infidel
Nov 13, 2014

Faggot of the Year
2012, 2014

this and the heroin thing were amazing, what kind of retard reads this stuff on the regular. In the heroin one she literally dies and then never calls her dad again

Pththya-lyi
Nov 8, 2009

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2020
It's not that I'm not incredibly privileged to be an affluent cishet white woman in 21st century America. I am. But I still feel compelled to write 10,000 words about struggling to get a thigh gap

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*

The 5th Foid posted:

i bet this ones real

It actually is

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Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
10 Reason Why Appropriating Gluten Free Diets Hurts the Poor And My Dinner Choices

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