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TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW

Earwicker posted:

You kind of answered your own question here. Lawyers wouldn't make any money if lawsuits were replaced with duels, and since most of our government is made of lawyers, former lawyers, and people owned by lawyers, dueling is illegal.

reform our torte laws to be dueling matches instead.

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texaholic
Sep 16, 2007

Well it's floodin' down in Texas
All of the telephone lines are down

Dick Fagballzson posted:

I think it would be pretty awesome to see someone get sued for foreclosure and put a bullet through some banker's face in a duel.

Let's be serious the banks would hire some psychopath ex military commando, who would murder everyone.

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer
Also, we do not need more ways for stupid people to prove themselves right. Cause it would totally improve things if the entire population of arfcom could go out and challenge all the minorities and liberals that they meet to duels.

edit:

texaholic posted:

Let's be serious the banks would hire some psychopath ex military commando, who would murder everyone.
Yeah since corporations are people, when you challenge someone to a duel who just works somewhere, their corporate duelist shows up.

TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW

Snak posted:

Also, we do not need more ways for stupid people to prove themselves right. Cause it would totally improve things if the entire population of arfcom could go out and challenge all the minorities and liberals that they meet to duels.

it actually would. we kinda brainwashed people to think violence is never a solution when it always is a solution just usually the worst one.

Cake Smashing Boob
Nov 5, 2008

I support black genocide

Snak posted:

Also, we do not need more ways for stupid people to prove themselves right. Cause it would totally improve things if the entire population of arfcom could go out and challenge all the minorities and liberals that they meet to duels.

The challenged party gets to choose the weapons for the duel

usually

texaholic
Sep 16, 2007

Well it's floodin' down in Texas
All of the telephone lines are down
wow just a random thought Uwe Boll would have killed lowtax and there would no SA today.

Shadoer
Aug 31, 2011


Zoe Quinn is one of many women targeted by the Gamergate harassment campaign.

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l33t b4c0n posted:

What were the rules of dueling? Like if someone challenged me, couldn't I just not accept and go on being an rear end? I'm pretty sure if I'm already an rear end in a top hat, I don't care about "honor".

The rules varied along with the punishment for not accepting.

You could be named a coward, however there would usually be other socially accepted reasons for not accepting a dual. The reasons usually were as follows

- You were deeply religious.
- The challenger could be legitimately argued as either insane or had his mental faculties incapacitated at the time of offering a dual.
- You could not agree on the terms of the dual. (Duals were usually expected to be fought with the same weapons, or weapons agreed before hand. If a disagreement could be found within reason, no dual)
- You knew you were going to lose. (You get out of being a coward, but you recognize the other person was going to beat you AND you need to give some satisfaction for the slight, ie cash)
- Mercy. If you were already known as a great fighter, you could deny a dual to a perceived lesser combatant out of mercy. Said combatant had to be married with children for that to work and you already had to have a good reputation.

There were also a bunch of reasons you could postpone a dual which were considered legitimate

- A national holiday or a special event, such as the coronation of a new King was happening that day or was near. The dual could be postponed till after.
- Health reasons, if you were sick for example.
- You were already tied into another dual. You could postpone till after that dual, assuming you live.

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
pretty sure most duels got cancelled the day of. both dudes showed up and realized they didnt really wanna do it and found some other way to work out their differences. that's why the seconds are there, to help negotiate at the last moment.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

John Denver Hoxha posted:

i demand satisfaction.... oral satisfaction

blowjob duel

texaholic
Sep 16, 2007

Well it's floodin' down in Texas
All of the telephone lines are down
Also gently caress the electoral college, republicans and democrats each get to select one person but that person has to be a current governor, national senator, vice president, cabinet member, or the mayor of one of the 10 largest American cities.

Anyone can be a third party candiate but you have to fight your way through a bracket to play with the big dogs in the "presidental duel", the third party candiate also starts with an unloaded gun.

Cake Smashing Boob
Nov 5, 2008

I support black genocide
Just hold a grand loving melee for pres. Last man standing.

Cake Smashing Boob fucked around with this message at 00:07 on Nov 21, 2014

Sono
Apr 9, 2008




Reverand maynard posted:

you should try it out

He's right (in :911:). Mutual combat is a legal defense.

State of Iowa v Christopher Spates, 2010 posted:

Mutual combat is more than a reciprocal exchange of blows. It requires a mutual intention, consent, or agreement preceding the initiation of hostilities. A charge on mutual combat is warranted only when the combatants are armed with deadly weapons and mutually agree to fight. Thus, an express or tacit agreement to engage in violence, while sufficient, is not required; it is enough that there was a concurrent or mutual expectation that a street battle would ensue....

To constitute mutual combat there must exist a mutual intent and willingness to fight and this intent may be manifested by the acts and conduct of the parties and the circumstances attending and leading up to the combat.

Sono fucked around with this message at 00:15 on Nov 21, 2014

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

Top City Homo posted:

blowjob duel
A 69, whoever cums first loses.

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

nomadologique posted:

dont they h ave consent fighting in washingon tsate or something?

yeah mutual combat

fanged wang
Nov 1, 2014

by Ralp

Shadoer posted:

The rules varied along with the punishment for not accepting.

You could be named a coward, however there would usually be other socially accepted reasons for not accepting a dual. The reasons usually were as follows

- You were deeply religious.
- The challenger could be legitimately argued as either insane or had his mental faculties incapacitated at the time of offering a dual.
- You could not agree on the terms of the dual. (Duals were usually expected to be fought with the same weapons, or weapons agreed before hand. If a disagreement could be found within reason, no dual)
- You knew you were going to lose. (You get out of being a coward, but you recognize the other person was going to beat you AND you need to give some satisfaction for the slight, ie cash)
- Mercy. If you were already known as a great fighter, you could deny a dual to a perceived lesser combatant out of mercy. Said combatant had to be married with children for that to work and you already had to have a good reputation.

There were also a bunch of reasons you could postpone a dual which were considered legitimate

- A national holiday or a special event, such as the coronation of a new King was happening that day or was near. The dual could be postponed till after.
- Health reasons, if you were sick for example.
- You were already tied into another dual. You could postpone till after that dual, assuming you live.

how do you know so much about duels without knowing how to spell the word duel?

rad duel info tho. somebody post the link about how duels mostly ended in people stabbing each other simultaneously

Shadoer
Aug 31, 2011


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Support a feminist today!


fanged wang posted:

how do you know so much about duels without knowing how to spell the word duel?

rad duel info tho. somebody post the link about how duels mostly ended in people stabbing each other simultaneously

Autocorrect is a fickle mistress.

Edit: Wow it was dual for every instance :(

TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW

fanged wang posted:

how do you know so much about duels without knowing how to spell the word duel?

rad duel info tho. somebody post the link about how duels mostly ended in people stabbing each other simultaneously

that sounds pretty metal.

the worst thing is
Oct 3, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
Because the state has amassed too much power and wants to be the only one that decides who lives and who dies, op. Its like that everywhere. Times were different before the world wars and nationalism.

NiceGuy
Dec 13, 2006

This is my BOOMSTICK
College Slice

Shadoer posted:

- You were already tied into another dual. You could postpone till after that dual, assuming you live.

For some reason this strikes me as kinda funny. What kind of a prick do you need to be to have multiple life-threatening duels on the docket?

fanged wang
Nov 1, 2014

by Ralp
the duellists is probably ridley scott's best film

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFkdcQgNJHo

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
dang the world of yu gi oh looiks like a pretty intense place to live!

fanged wang
Nov 1, 2014

by Ralp

i didn't click that but it seems kind of an inappropriate thing for an adult to watch and make reference to that's just my $0.02 thoug

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

NiceGuy posted:

For some reason this strikes me as kinda funny. What kind of a prick do you need to be to have multiple life-threatening duels on the docket?

well it was the initial setup for the Three Musketeers

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer

fanged wang posted:

the duellists is probably ridley scott's best film

I'm not sure it's his best, but it's pretty loving good.

Shadoer
Aug 31, 2011


Zoe Quinn is one of many women targeted by the Gamergate harassment campaign.

Support a feminist today!


NiceGuy posted:

For some reason this strikes me as kinda funny. What kind of a prick do you need to be to have multiple life-threatening duels on the docket?

Sadly it wasn't that hard.

The usual scenario this occurred was when someone did something to piss off a whole bunch of people at once, and usually there was a woman involved.

A funny story I remember. If memory serves me right there was an incident in Poland where a woman was supposed to be married off to a guy in another family, but then eloped with a lowly Polish Knight. This caused her father, her former fiance, and her brother to challenge her husband to duels all at the same time. There was then a disagreement on who was going to have the honor of fighting him first, and ended up that her former fiance and her brother ended up dueling each other first in order to see who would fight the Knight. The brother then won that duel and then decided to withdraw his challenge to the knight after the fact.

Shadoer fucked around with this message at 01:02 on Nov 21, 2014

TheLittlestBiking
Jul 4, 2011
Yeah here in Washington we have mutual combat laws, in practice if you get into a fight with someone when the police show up and the situation looked fair and you both say we were fighting each other you are off the hook, if it went into a crowd or something you could be charged with disturbing the peace or disorderly conduct but usually they just separate you and leave

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

NiceGuy posted:

For some reason this strikes me as kinda funny. What kind of a prick do you need to be to have multiple life-threatening duels on the docket?

Andrew Jackson

quote:

Contemporaries described Jackson, who had already served in Tennessee's Senate and was practicing law at the time of the duel, as argumentative, physically violent and fond of dueling to solve conflicts. Estimates of the number of duels in which Jackson participated ranged from five to 100.

quote:

At the first signal from their seconds, Dickinson fired. Jackson received Dickinson's first bullet in the chest next to his heart. Jackson put his hand over the wound to staunch the flow of blood and stayed standing long enough to fire his gun. Dickinson's seconds claimed Jackson's first shot misfired, which would have meant the duel was over, but, in a breach of etiquette, Jackson re-cocked the gun and shot again, this time killing his opponent.

pretty metal though

texaholic
Sep 16, 2007

Well it's floodin' down in Texas
All of the telephone lines are down

TheLittlestBiking posted:

Yeah here in Washington we have mutual combat laws, in practice if you get into a fight with someone when the police show up and the situation looked fair and you both say we were fighting each other you are off the hook, if it went into a crowd or something you could be charged with disturbing the peace or disorderly conduct but usually they just separate you and leave

lol sounds like you don't have any mexicans in washington

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
duelling has actually been illegal for most of its history. what really killed it was ww1 and the understanding people had that if you were at the somme or verdun you didnt really have poo poo to prove to anyone and some guy calling you a human being wasnt worth getting rank and murdery over

Hexel
Nov 18, 2011




Reverand maynard posted:

hello federal court, see this murder I committed is legal because of this state law thats still on the books therefore

Dude just demand a trial by combat

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1416262/Court-refuses-trial-by-combat.html

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
german dueling codes got updated after ww1 to call for six shots from a revolver followed by close combat with a trench spike, because after youve been strafed with machine guns and artillery suddenly matchlocks and cavalry sabers just arent that big a deal anymore

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
then again german codes during the late 19th century made zero bones about the fact that you were here to settle an honor debt and if you pussied out like some frenchman after merely getting blooded then nothing was resolved and you were a double bitch, so i guess the take-away here is that germans have always been a little creepy

Robbie Fowler
May 31, 2011
Personally i'd rather see jousting to solve a conflict

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
dance off or rap battle for me

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO

paranoid randroid posted:

then again german codes during the late 19th century made zero bones about the fact that you were here to settle an honor debt and if you pussied out like some frenchman after merely getting blooded then nothing was resolved and you were a double bitch, so i guess the take-away here is that germans have always been a little creepy

pre-cheevo completionists is how i would describe them

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
chicks dig the schmisse

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
german collegiate dueling: stand your rear end still while the other guy hacks at your loving face. flinch and youre out of the frat, frosh.

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
first return on my GIS

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paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
all the fly frauleins wanna get with that guy

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