This is the thread for posting  SERIOUS improvements to existing products & services. Cool ones that own, not poo poo like "a bike that can fly you to space", that's stupid & unrealistic. Idiot  Here, I'll give you some ideas to start with: *A toaster that can also suck your dick *A DVR that senses when it's used to record My Little Pony, and adds you to the Sex Offender registry in your state *A rifle or shotgun stock that has a built-in fleshlight, linked to the firing mechanism. Make your gun shoot as you do! *A toilet that features a robotic arm with a brush to scrub inside your b-hole after you take a poo poo *"Pre-skidded" underwear *Quizno's subs that come with a little reservoir for semen after you're done loving the sandwich, so you don't have to eat your cum if you don't want to HALL OF FAME the new pleb posted:its called FuckFactory, where I take the most efficient and least sexy thing about the Ford corporation and combine it with the least efficient and most sexy part of the Vivid corporation. Torka posted:a gun that fires continuously unless the trigger is pulled pretty soft girl posted:a bass guitar that's also a keurig Quickscope420dad posted:A television channel which is simultaneously incredibly pleasant to watch but also sets your mind into a thoughtloop using binaural beats to engage the death process, painlessly killing you as you watch the blissful images Ratjaculation posted:
Applewhite posted:There should be a reality show to determine the president of the United States. Put all the candidates in a Big Brother House type situation, and they would gradually get voted out of the house over the course of the season with the last candidate standing becoming the Prez. During their stay, they will face problems that are representative of dilemmas faced by the average American and must propose solutions. Noyemi K fucked around with this message at 16:26 on Dec 2, 2014 |
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Nov 24, 2014 14:22
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a prostitute with a lcd screen surgically grafted onto their face with my favorite anime playing on a loop
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Nov 24, 2014 14:24
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Oh yeah, a PC-98 emulator that turns into a rootkit when you try to play touhou games on it
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Nov 24, 2014 14:28
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A disclaimer at the beginning of the Star Wars prequels that declares them non-canon. A bike with square wheels so it can't be stolen. A dishwasher but it washes shoes. Pizza delivery bundled with movie rental so you pick the movie you want and they bring it over with the pizza. For a nominal fee, they also swing by to pick it up when you're done. A machine like a giant windshiled wiper only it mows your lawn. Pringles with a can that opens on both ends and has a barrier in the middle so when you get down to halfway you just flip it over and open the other side. A purple Sonic the Hedgehog who is like twice as fast also she's a girl. She is Sonic's long lost sister and dates an aged-up version of Tails in my fanfic. Better image embedding on Giantessforums.net
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Nov 24, 2014 14:50
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a dildo jammed onto the business end of a jigsaw
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Nov 24, 2014 14:51
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A chainsaw, powered by love
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Nov 24, 2014 15:56
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the new pleb posted:A chainsaw, powered by love *never works for anyone*
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Nov 24, 2014 15:56
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Garbage disposal for the bathtub so it doesnt clog when i get my stew on.
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Nov 24, 2014 15:58
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Nukes scaled down to be used by ants. Watch an itty-bitty nuclear war erupt right on your front lawn.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:10
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Really cool improvements guys; big money take note! These people are the future of the industry! Overpriced vacuums that literally pay for themselves.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:16
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a sword made exclusively from multitools, and as u swing it around a buncha poo poo like scissors and pliers and lil saws pop out and flop lal ove rth eplace.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:17
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A combination cotton-candy/cashgrab machine that makes you into a green hybrid benjamin franklin ala jeff goldblum in the fly.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:36
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a mattress with a hole for your balls
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Nov 24, 2014 16:40
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double sided scissors
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Nov 24, 2014 16:42
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genetically engineered lettuce that looks exactly like US $100 bills so that you can make and eat a salad of $100 bills
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Nov 24, 2014 16:43
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A car that has a frame made entirely of jerky. When you crash it, you can gnaw on it while you wait for the cops to slam you with a dui
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Nov 24, 2014 16:44
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Bubble solution that makes bubbles as hard as glass.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:45
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a bart simpson themed version of the remaining few products that have not had a bart simpson themed version yet
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Nov 24, 2014 16:46
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Bacon-flavoured mouthwash that doubles as sex and vehicle lube!
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Nov 24, 2014 16:47
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a handgun shaped vape
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Nov 24, 2014 16:48
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a shotgun that plays nirvana when you pull the trigger
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Nov 24, 2014 16:48
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Dwarf Prison. you'll save millions in building materials, become a correctional giant on the broad backs of little men.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:49
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Applewhite posted:Nukes scaled down to be used by ants. Watch an itty-bitty nuclear war erupt right on your front lawn. Can we go back to how this is clearly the winning answer? I have spent the last half hour trying to find something better than an ant cold war, and in the process my best answer turned out to be juvenile hall.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:53
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the new pleb posted:Dwarf Prison. Piggybacking on that: Dwarf submarines. Save millions on taxpayer dollars on subs that cost half as much in materials to build, and are more difficult to detect.
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Nov 24, 2014 17:06
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truck nuts made from polonium
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Nov 24, 2014 17:07
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Applewhite posted:
Pringles can with a gateway to another dimension inside.
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Nov 24, 2014 17:09
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Applewhite posted:Pizza delivery bundled with movie rental so you pick the movie you want and they bring it over with the pizza. For a nominal fee, they also swing by to pick it up when you're done. This exists but it's also the year 2014
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Nov 24, 2014 17:09
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A scooter that constantly rips on you for being a lazy poo poo. (With optional apology mode if you are actually disabled.)
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Nov 24, 2014 17:12
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A segway that neatly folds up so it can be inserted up your rear end.
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Nov 24, 2014 17:13
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Toilets that use sulfuric acid instead of water Chilli powder laced underwear Chilli powder laced contact lenses
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Nov 24, 2014 17:13
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Archer666 posted:Toilets that use sulfuric acid instead of water Hmmm change those normal toilets to bidets and the sulfuric acid to flourosulfuric acid and you're onto something buddy!
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Nov 24, 2014 17:20
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a salt shaker with a visual design that is based on the Strategic Arms Limitation Talks and resulting anti-ballstic nuclear missile proliferation treaties. more specifically this salt shaker will resemble some sort of free gift or "tchotchke" handed out at the Talks which thus imply that the owner of this salt shaker was present for and a participent in them
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Nov 24, 2014 17:23
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A system for categorizing women's butt sizes that is as simple to visualize and use as the bra-cup system so I can google "g-cup butts" and get the results I'm looking for right away.
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Nov 24, 2014 17:24
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an NPR tote bag filled with food stamps and SSI forms
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Nov 24, 2014 17:24
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A penis pump that actually makes your dick bigger over time
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Nov 24, 2014 17:26
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a bust of Lenin with a hidden camera in one of the eyes that automatically uploads the footage directly to a server at the local Stasi headquarters on a quarterly basis
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Nov 24, 2014 17:28
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A mail-order DVD rental service that also allows you to stream movies over the internet. ALL of the movies.
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Nov 24, 2014 17:30
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nanobutter
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Nov 24, 2014 17:45
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Socks that have hard rubber soles so you can wear them in lieu of shoes. A scorpion with medicine in its tail instead of poison. A beanie with a propellor mounted on top to keep you cool. An ice machine that makes flavored ice cubes. An inflatable raft shaped like a big steak.
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Nov 24, 2014 18:05
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 06:49 |
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Condoms that put themselves on you when you're not lookingApplewhite posted:Socks that have hard rubber soles so you can wear them in lieu of shoes. iirc they make tabi that are basically this; Japanese construction workers love 'em
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Nov 24, 2014 18:10
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