Dec '14 Police Lounge Thread: Donate to Darren Wilson's Kickstarter in here

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Dec '14 Police Lounge Thread: Donate to Darren Wilson's Kickstarter in here

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Pilot to Gunner: Aug 21, 2009; That's what you get, you get fork stabbed.

Branis posted:

it was like -18 degrees overnight and it will be just barely above zero tonight. My new years resolution is to kill/steal/win enough money to be living on a tropical island where it is 80 year round with beautiful brown women in coconut bikinis by this time next year.

You lucky bastard, I want to see a goddamn winter. I'm on my way back from the east coast and it was mild as hell. I heard it snowed in Las Vegas last night for the first time in years and I missed it. Warm and sunny gets old, I tell ya.

Oh poo poo- police helicopter in Vegas just crashed into a residential area.

Edit- two officers sustained minor injuries but will be OK. No one on the ground hurt. People everywhere enraged at police for using kamikaze tactics in blatant attempt to take out as many innocent civilians as possible.

Pilot to Gunner fucked around with this message at 00:50 on Jan 1, 2015

# ? Jan 1, 2015 00:04

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# ? Apr 29, 2024 07:03

Melthir: Dec 29, 2009; I need to go scrap some money together cause my avatar is just sad.

Miltank posted:

How was "I can't breath" a lie?

Choke yourself hard, to the point you literally canvt breathe. Now try to say the same statement. You can't. If you cant breathe you cant speak.

Now, don't get me wrong. In my opinion what happened there from the reports that I have read the situation should never have gotten to that point and I hope that if I ever start squeezing someones neck short of them having a top mount on me I hope one if the guys pistol whips me in the back of the head.

TLDR. If you can speak you can breathe. Shits hosed up.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 00:57

Branis: Apr 14, 2006; by VG

Post copied in its entirety from reddit. It is worth reading on the if you can speak you can breath myth
I am not the original author. :cumpolice:

Hearing that phrase come out of someone's mouth always upsets me, because it can easily lead to a preventable death.So let's explore why this is false, because anyone who comes up against a situation like this needs to realize that You CAN speak if you cannot breathe!!
This is true for multiple reasons, so let's explore them:
The lungs have what are called "Volumes" and "Capacities". The link describes all of them. For our purposes, you need to understand these two phrases: Functional Reserve Capacity (the amount of air left in the lungs after a normal exhalation) and Expiratory Reserve Volume (the amount of air you can still force out of your lungs after a normal exhalation).

When you take a normal breath you breathe in and out you are breathing about 500ml of air. After breathing out, you are left with ~2400ml of air inside your lungs, this is the Functional Reserve Capacity. If you try to force out as much air as possible, you can still force out ~1200ml more air. This is the Expiratory Reserve Volume. This is air you are able to speak with even if you cannot take a normal breath. Important Note: Notice that the Expiratory Reserve Volume is more than twice the size of a normal breath. That is a lot of air you are able to force out, and a lot of speaking you can do even if you can't breathe.
The lungs work on negative pressure. So, your lungs, when you breathe in, are at a lower pressure than the outside air. This draws the air into them. This is caused by your diaphragm and intercostal muscles. Your lungs are very elastic, and will move back to their normal size during exhalation. This is where the problem begins for officers. If you are kneeling on a suspect, or you have them handcuffed on the ground so that they are on their chest, there is a strong possibility that you can cut off their ability to breathe. Once the lungs begin to exhale, they collapse, but if you they are being pressed down on by body weight, they may not be able to re-expand. They then continue to collapse, forcing out the Functional Reserve Capacity of air, but not drawing in a new breath. So, your suspect may be pleading for breath, they may actually be incapable of drawing one in, and the reason is you. If someone is saying they cannot breathe, you need to believe them, because you might be killing them. Furthermore, during any kind of physical altercation, that person may be breathing deeply and rapidly, making their lungs collapse faster when you are kneeling on them or holding them on the ground.
Asthma. Some of you may be saying "Well, the guy who died in LAPD's care had asthma, that wasn't the officer's fault or the jail's fault." Oh yes it was. If someone is telling you they have asthma and they can't breathe, you need to believe them. Asthma is a constriction of the airways, no different than being strangled. They will still be able to speak and they will still be dying slowly. It took 30 minutes for that man to die, and that was entirely preventable.
Demonstrations:

First Demonstration: Take a normal breath in and then a normal breath out. Then, after exhaling, force out as much air as you possibly can. Even after doing this, you will find you are able to speak. I am able to speak for about 5 - 10 seconds afterwards, in short, wheezing, gaspy words, but I can speak. If you don't inhale at this point, you will begin to suffocate, but you will still be capable of speech even as you are dying. IMPORTANT EDIT: And that's not to say a person will only be able to speak for a few seconds, they could speak for minutes while being unable to draw a breath in. Keep in mind, you are purposely forcing out the Expiratory Reserve Volume during this demonstration, but a suspect/inmate might not be. They may be on the ground, unable to breathe in, but entirely capable of speech for minutes as they slowly die.

Second Demonstration:It is much easier to force air out than it is to draw air in. To demonstrate, take a normal breath (not deep) in and out. After you exhale, pinch your nose shut with one hand and hold your other hand very tightly over your mouth. When you breathe in you will either be unable to breathe in or you will only breathe in a sliver of air. But if you force the air out, you will note that it is able to come out past your hand, it will cause your hand and fingers to vibrate, and there is still a good chunk of air in your lungs despite you having exhaled. Now, imagine your fingers and hand are your Larynx (voice box). That's how speech is still possible in a situation where someone is being suffocated.

Final Thoughts
So why are you suffocating if so much air is still in your lungs? Part of the problem is that the air left over in the lungs after exhalation is not oxygenated, so your lungs are full of CO2 gas. This air is useless to your blood, so even though your bronchioles are full of air, you are still suffocating to death.
Obesity: Not Everyone Has The Same Lung Capacity: There are factors that can make a person have a smaller lung capacity than someone else. These factors include:
1. Being obese
2. Being a female
3. Living at low altitudes
4. Being a smoker
While the third and fourth are probably not terribly important for our purposes, the first two certainly are. This is important because not only does an obese person have smaller lung capacity, they also can have their lungs fail to expand due to their own body weight if they are lying on the ground facedown. An obese person is at extreme risk of suffocation in any instance where their airways are being blocked or where they are cuffed and on the ground. Don't gently caress around if they say they can't breathe, they're probably not lying.

Branis fucked around with this message at 01:09 on Jan 1, 2015

# ? Jan 1, 2015 01:07

Reign Of Pain: May 1, 2005; Nap Ghost

Branis posted:

Post copied in its entirety from reddit. It is worth reading on the if you can speak you can breath myth
I am not the original author.

Hearing that phrase come out of someone's mouth always upsets me, because it can easily lead to a preventable death.So let's explore why this is false, because anyone who comes up against a situation like this needs to realize that You CAN speak if you cannot breathe!!
This is true for multiple reasons, so let's explore them:
The lungs have what are called "Volumes" and "Capacities". The link describes all of them. For our purposes, you need to understand these two phrases: Functional Reserve Capacity (the amount of air left in the lungs after a normal exhalation) and Expiratory Reserve Volume (the amount of air you can still force out of your lungs after a normal exhalation).

When you take a normal breath you breathe in and out you are breathing about 500ml of air. After breathing out, you are left with ~2400ml of air inside your lungs, this is the Functional Reserve Capacity. If you try to force out as much air as possible, you can still force out ~1200ml more air. This is the Expiratory Reserve Volume. This is air you are able to speak with even if you cannot take a normal breath. Important Note: Notice that the Expiratory Reserve Volume is more than twice the size of a normal breath. That is a lot of air you are able to force out, and a lot of speaking you can do even if you can't breathe.
The lungs work on negative pressure. So, your lungs, when you breathe in, are at a lower pressure than the outside air. This draws the air into them. This is caused by your diaphragm and intercostal muscles. Your lungs are very elastic, and will move back to their normal size during exhalation. This is where the problem begins for officers. If you are kneeling on a suspect, or you have them handcuffed on the ground so that they are on their chest, there is a strong possibility that you can cut off their ability to breathe. Once the lungs begin to exhale, they collapse, but if you they are being pressed down on by body weight, they may not be able to re-expand. They then continue to collapse, forcing out the Functional Reserve Capacity of air, but not drawing in a new breath. So, your suspect may be pleading for breath, they may actually be incapable of drawing one in, and the reason is you. If someone is saying they cannot breathe, you need to believe them, because you might be killing them. Furthermore, during any kind of physical altercation, that person may be breathing deeply and rapidly, making their lungs collapse faster when you are kneeling on them or holding them on the ground.
Asthma. Some of you may be saying "Well, the guy who died in LAPD's care had asthma, that wasn't the officer's fault or the jail's fault." Oh yes it was. If someone is telling you they have asthma and they can't breathe, you need to believe them. Asthma is a constriction of the airways, no different than being strangled. They will still be able to speak and they will still be dying slowly. It took 30 minutes for that man to die, and that was entirely preventable.
Demonstrations:

First Demonstration: Take a normal breath in and then a normal breath out. Then, after exhaling, force out as much air as you possibly can. Even after doing this, you will find you are able to speak. I am able to speak for about 5 - 10 seconds afterwards, in short, wheezing, gaspy words, but I can speak. If you don't inhale at this point, you will begin to suffocate, but you will still be capable of speech even as you are dying. IMPORTANT EDIT: And that's not to say a person will only be able to speak for a few seconds, they could speak for minutes while being unable to draw a breath in. Keep in mind, you are purposely forcing out the Expiratory Reserve Volume during this demonstration, but a suspect/inmate might not be. They may be on the ground, unable to breathe in, but entirely capable of speech for minutes as they slowly die.

Second Demonstration:It is much easier to force air out than it is to draw air in. To demonstrate, take a normal breath (not deep) in and out. After you exhale, pinch your nose shut with one hand and hold your other hand very tightly over your mouth. When you breathe in you will either be unable to breathe in or you will only breathe in a sliver of air. But if you force the air out, you will note that it is able to come out past your hand, it will cause your hand and fingers to vibrate, and there is still a good chunk of air in your lungs despite you having exhaled. Now, imagine your fingers and hand are your Larynx (voice box). That's how speech is still possible in a situation where someone is being suffocated.

Final Thoughts
So why are you suffocating if so much air is still in your lungs? Part of the problem is that the air left over in the lungs after exhalation is not oxygenated, so your lungs are full of CO2 gas. This air is useless to your blood, so even though your bronchioles are full of air, you are still suffocating to death.
Obesity: Not Everyone Has The Same Lung Capacity: There are factors that can make a person have a smaller lung capacity than someone else. These factors include:
1. Being obese
2. Being a female
3. Living at low altitudes
4. Being a smoker
While the third and fourth are probably not terribly important for our purposes, the first two certainly are. This is important because not only does an obese person have smaller lung capacity, they also can have their lungs fail to expand due to their own body weight if they are lying on the ground facedown. An obese person is at extreme risk of suffocation in any instance where their airways are being blocked or where they are cuffed and on the ground. Don't gently caress around if they say they can't breathe, they're probably not lying.

#FatLowlandSmokerBitches4Re4m

# ? Jan 1, 2015 01:27

Miltank: Dec 27, 2009; by XyloJW

Melthir posted:

Choke yourself hard, to the point you literally canvt breathe. Now try to say the same statement. You can't. If you cant breathe you cant speak.

Now, don't get me wrong. In my opinion what happened there from the reports that I have read the situation should never have gotten to that point and I hope that if I ever start squeezing someones neck short of them having a top mount on me I hope one if the guys pistol whips me in the back of the head.

TLDR. If you can speak you can breathe. Shits hosed up.

Obviously this isn't true, but was Cmdr Shepard referring to something else when he said that "I can't breath" is a lie? Sorry if I'm being pedantic, but I am curious as to what the actual argument is here.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 02:29

Zeroisanumber: Oct 23, 2010; Nap Ghost

Pilot to Gunner posted:

Edit- two officers sustained minor injuries but will be OK. No one on the ground hurt. People everywhere enraged at police for using kamikaze tactics in blatant attempt to take out as many innocent civilians as possible.

Glad that everyone was mostly OK, helicopter accidents are no joke.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 04:02

chartley: Jul 1, 2004; Nessy says get tae

Edwardian posted:

Happy New Year!

Be safe tonight, Copgoons.

Not back to work for 2 more days. It's Hogmanay (aka scottish New Years). This requires industrial scales of alcohol consumption. In part due to Hogmanay and in part due to being off work. Consider it in progress.

chartley fucked around with this message at 13:32 on Jan 1, 2015

# ? Jan 1, 2015 04:05

Branis: Apr 14, 2006; by VG

According to wikipedia this is the english translation of the song.
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and days of long ago?
CHORUS:
For days of long ago, my dear,
for days of long ago,
we'll take a cup of kindness yet,
for days of long ago.
And surely you�ll buy your pint cup!
and surely I�ll buy mine!
And we'll take a cup o� kindness yet,
for days of long ago.
CHORUS
We two have run about the slopes,
and picked the daisies fine;
But we�ve wandered many a weary foot,
since days of long ago.
CHORUS
We two have paddled in the stream,
from morning sun till dine�;
But seas between us broad have roared
since days of long ago.
CHORUS
And there�s a hand my trusty friend!
And give me a hand o� thine!
And we�ll take a right good-will draught,
for days of long ago.

Here is the scottish pronunciation guide.
Shid ald akwentans bee firgot,
an nivir brocht ti mynd?
Shid ald akwentans bee firgot,
an ald lang syn*?
CHORUS:
Fir ald lang syn, ma jo,
fir ald lang syn,
wil tak a cup o kyndnes yet,
fir ald lang syn.
An sheerly yil bee yur pynt-staup!
an sheerly al bee myn!
An will tak a cup o kyndnes yet,
fir ald lang syn.
CHORUS
We twa hay rin aboot the braes,
an pood the gowans fyn;
Bit weev wandert monae a weery fet,
sin ald lang syn.
CHORUS
We twa hay pedilt in the burn,
fray mornin sun til dyn;
But seas between us bred hay roard
sin ald lang syn.
CHORUS
An thers a han, my trustee feer!
an gees a han o thyn!
And we�ll tak a richt� gude-willie-waucht�,
fir ald lang syn.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 04:30

Tyro: Nov 10, 2009

Happy new year.

Edit: one of the things I miss about being in uniform was the annual contest my shift had to see who could get the first arrest of the new year.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 04:56

Smiling Jack: Dec 2, 2001; I sucked a dick for bus fare and then I walked home.

gonna go up on the roof and fire my guns wildly into the air while pouring whiskey on myself and crying for the dead American Dream and then making out with a male blow up sex doll labeled "Sid hatfield"

remember me

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:17

beanieson: Sep 25, 2008; I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av

same

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:19

Kung Fu Fist Fuck: Aug 9, 2009

Smiling Jack posted:

gonna go up on the roof and fire my guns wildly into the air while pouring whiskey on myself and crying for the dead American Dream and then making out with a male blow up sex doll labeled "Sid hatfield"

remember me

a good night

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:20

JayKay: Sep 11, 2001; And you thought they were cute and cuddly.

Smiling Jack posted:

gonna go up on the roof and fire my guns wildly into the air while pouring whiskey on myself and crying for the dead American Dream and then making out with a male blow up sex doll labeled "Sid hatfield"

remember me

That's weird that TheSoldier autocorrected to "Sid Hatfield"

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:24

Pilot to Gunner: Aug 21, 2009; That's what you get, you get fork stabbed.

Poll: percentage of noise disturbance reports in your area that will turn out to be fireworks vs actual gunshots?

Second poll: does anyone even respond to check anymore?

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:36

Reign Of Pain: May 1, 2005; Nap Ghost

2015 Cop Thread: gently caress the World, just fyi

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:40

Smiling Jack: Dec 2, 2001; I sucked a dick for bus fare and then I walked home.

Despite the "slowdown" the NYPD has made 38 firearms arrest this week :toot:

Nights not over yet :clint:

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:41

beanieson: Sep 25, 2008; I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av

2015 cop lounge: gently caress monthly stats, we're keeping this thing going all year :toot:

# ? Jan 1, 2015 05:49

JayKay: Sep 11, 2001; And you thought they were cute and cuddly.

Just sitting here listening to the ~~fireworks~~ pending gunshot calls.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 06:07

Reign Of Pain: May 1, 2005; Nap Ghost

Please arrest/kill all people blowing poo poo up.

Also, this was a good movie even though there wasn't enough how-to-idness :colbert:

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? Jan 1, 2015 06:20

beanieson: Sep 25, 2008; I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av

Reign Of Pain posted:

Please arrest/kill all people blowing poo poo up.

Also, this was a good movie even though there wasn't enough how-to-idness

ur a weird dude RoP don't evar change

2015poston in a 14 thread cus FTP

# ? Jan 1, 2015 07:02

chartley: Jul 1, 2004; Nessy says get tae

Branis posted:

.

Here is the scottish pronunciation guide.
Shid ald akwentans bee firgot,
an nivir brocht ti mynd?
Shid ald akwentans bee firgot,
an ald lang syn*?
CHORUS:
Fir ald lang syn, ma jo,
fir ald lang syn,
wil tak a cup o kyndnes yet,
fir ald lang syn.
An sheerly yil bee yur pynt-staup!
an sheerly al bee myn!
An will tak a cup o kyndnes yet,
fir ald lang syn.
CHORUS
We twa hay rin aboot the braes,
an pood the gowans fyn;
Bit weev wandert monae a weery fet,
sin ald lang syn.
CHORUS
We twa hay pedilt in the burn,
fray mornin sun til dyn;
But seas between us bred hay roard
sin ald lang syn.
CHORUS
An thers a han, my trustee feer!
an gees a han o thyn!
And we�ll tak a richt� gude-willie-waucht�,
fir ald lang syn.

Checks out. Didn't sing any of it earlier but could easily chant those lyrics as given. Beautiful language.

It's now 0615 and I'm back home with a portion of chips (fries) with salt and vinegar on them and a cheese burger. Merry new year all pigs of the world!

# ? Jan 1, 2015 07:17

SrgMagnum: Nov 12, 2007; Got old money, could buy a dinosaur

For the first time in years I'm considering waiting up for the big gunshot extravaganza.

West Coast Best Coast getting the new year late yo.

GoonCop Thread January 2015: Seriously, somebody gently caress the police.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 07:56

`Nemesis: Dec 30, 2000; railroad graffiti

Heard the post midnight gunshots and January posting in the December thread, life is good right now

# ? Jan 1, 2015 08:24

Pilot to Gunner: Aug 21, 2009; That's what you get, you get fork stabbed.

SrgMagnum posted:

West Coast Best Coast getting the new year late yo.

takin' nyquil and staying up til midnight in 2014 wooooooooo

# ? Jan 1, 2015 08:46

Nerdlord Actual: Apr 14, 2007; Awaken to your true self with Wisconsin Potatoes; Grimey Drawer

JANUARY POSTING gently caress THE MODS gently caress THE POLICE

Happy New Year you filthy animals.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 09:20

Untagged: Mar 29, 2004; Hey, does your planet have wiper fluid yet or you gonna freak out and start worshiping us?

First New Years off in like 6 years.

Drunk. Posting in the 2014 thread so.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 09:59

Smiling Jack: Dec 2, 2001; I sucked a dick for bus fare and then I walked home.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 11:59

Shooting Blanks: Jun 6, 2007; Real bullets mess up how cool this thing looks.

-Blade

gently caress the police, gonna sleep comfortably here because I have nothing to fear.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 13:29

JayKay: Sep 11, 2001; And you thought they were cute and cuddly.

Working OT today because next squad is short. Ching Ching!

# ? Jan 1, 2015 14:58

Branis: Apr 14, 2006; by VG

JayKay posted:

Working OT today because next squad is short. Ching Ching!

did someone sick call on a holiday? loving any cop that sick calls on the day before/of/after a holiday should be auto welfare checked. loving lazy dicks.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 15:10

Smiling Jack: Dec 2, 2001; I sucked a dick for bus fare and then I walked home.

JayKay posted:

Working OT today because next squad is short. Ching Ching!

You can do that? Around here it's "you're a man short today suck it up"

# ? Jan 1, 2015 15:13

JayKay: Sep 11, 2001; And you thought they were cute and cuddly.

Branis posted:

did someone sick call on a holiday? loving any cop that sick calls on the day before/of/after a holiday should be auto welfare checked. loving lazy dicks.

Yup and the person who called out is notorious for calling out on holidays. Easy money for me.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 15:30

Branis: Apr 14, 2006; by VG

new thread is up shitlords quit breaking policy by posting in the old one or i'll tell the shift sergeant.

# ? Jan 1, 2015 15:33

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 29, 2024 07:03

beanieson: Sep 25, 2008; I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av

# ? Jan 1, 2015 16:22

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Dec '14 Police Lounge Thread: Donate to Darren Wilson's Kickstarter in here

«‹›13 »