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KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008
<--- No Video





<--- Good Idea Matt




TLC AND STAIRS:(SUNDAY)
TABLES: CENA VS SETH
STAIRS: SHOW VS ROWAN
LADDER: HARPER VS DOLPH
CHAIRS: RYBACK VS KANE
TLC: DEAN VS WYATT
DIVAS: NIKKI VS AJ
TAG: MIZ/DOW VS USOS
US: RUSEV VS SWAGGER
PRESHOW: NEW DAY VS DUSTS

NXT R EVOLUTION(THURSDAY ON NETWORK)
NXT TITLE VS CAREER: NEVILLE VS SAMI
WOMENS: CHARLOTTE VS SASHA
TAG: LUCHADORS VS OLD TIMEY GUYS
KENTA/DEVITT VS ASCENSION
BARON CORBIN VS BULL DEMPSEY(?)
KEVIN STEEN DEBUTS AS KEVIN OWENS

RAW STUFF
Jerry Lawler comes out and introduces us to Seth Green, who then gets interrupted by Miz and Mizdow. Miz says he's a Hollywood A Lister and is wonder why a fellow A Lister like Seth hasn't collaborated with him yet. Seth says the only A Lister he sees is Mizdow. Miz then presents Awesome Moment of the Year: Yes Movement Occupy Raw, Sting debuts in WWE and helps Ziggler defeat the Authority, Steve Austin, The Rock, and Hulk Hogan open Wrestlemania 30, Stephanie McMahon gets arrested.

Seth Rollins defeats Dolph Ziggler with interference from Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury.

The winner of Awesome Moment of the Year is Sting's Debut. Seth Rollins is pissed and steals the Slammy and shouts about Sting because Sting isn't there.

Kofi Kingston defeats Stardust.

John Laurinitis comes out to announce the people up for Surprise Return of the Year: Hulk Hogan, Batista, The Rock, and Ultimate Warrior. Note that only one of these was actually a surprise. They come back from commercial and the winner is Ultimate Warrior. They play a tribute video because Warrior is dead and can't receive the award obviously.

Paul Heyman is backstage and bumps into Seth Rollins. Heyman says something about Brock vs Cena and Seth attacking Brock. Seth talks about cashing in.

NXT Preview Match: NXT Women's champion Charlotte is here to promote NXT R Evolution and her title match against Sasha Banks. She loses to Natalya in a short match after a video package hypes her up. Cole called Charlotte Summer Rae at one point.

Santino Marrella is out to make a gay joke and present OMG Moment of the Year: Brock Breaks the Streak, Seth betrays the Shield, Bray Wyatt and his creepy children sing Whole World in His Hands at John Cena, Nikki Bella turns on Brie Bella. Back from commercial and Brock breaking the Streak wins. Paul Heyman comes out because Brock isn't here, seems like a running theme. Cuts the same promo he's been cutting all year.

Bray Wyatt comes out to cut a promo after his vicious beating on Dean Ambrose from Friday. That rocking chair was made from Sister Abigail's favorite tree and was the last thing Bray had to remember her by. Bray says he will destroy Dean and no one will be sadder for it. An ambulance rolls up filled with smoke and out from the shining light inside appears Dean Ambrose in a neck brace. He pulls a table, a ladder, and two chairs out of the ambulance and hurls them onto the stage. He rips his neck brace off and takes the ladder and chairs ringside to brawl with Bray. He tosses the chairs in the ring and Bray goes to use one but Dean hits him with the ladder. Dean throws more chairs into the ring and one hits Bray in the head. He slides a table in and Bray runs for it. Dean lays on the table for Bray to come back. Bray takes the bate and gets another chair thrown right at him knocking him off the apron. Dean says Bray's made a big mistake because the real monster at TLC will be Dean. At the PPV Dean will eat Bray alive.

Seth Green comes out, introduces us to Jerry Lawler as presenter of Diva of the Year. Brie Bella, Nikki Bella, Paige, AJ Lee. Come back from commercial and all the ladies are standing around backstage waiting for the announcement. Titus O'Neil walks in and stands behind them smiling. This is never explained on TV, but on the app he says he won Best Dressed of the Year and was showing off his suit. Best Dressed is not an award. Winner of Diva of the Year is AJ Lee. She comes out and puts over the NXT Divas as people who should win Diva of the Year next year, but she isn't done in the WWE by a long shot.

Renee Young interviews John Cena backstage. Cena says he's here to step up and no one else in the WWE can step up like he can. Not Seth and not Big Show. He says tonight he takes on the big puppet of the Authority Big Show. At TLC he takes on Seth Rollins in a Tables match, which is a good thing because Seth couldn't pin Cena anyway. Tonight Cena steps up and will win at TLC.

Erick Rowan defeats Luke Harper by DQ because Harper brought a ladder with him and hit Rowan with it. Rowan got back up and threw Harper into the steps a lot.

Naomi was doing her makeup backstage when Jimmy Uso comes up to her. Naomi was talking to Miz's agent and Jimmy didn't like that.

Adam Rose and the Rosebuds come out to present LOL Moment of the Year: WeeLC Match, Mizdow, Mr. T talking about his Momma, Vickie Guerrero shoving Stephanie McMahon into a pool of pudding. Back from commercial and Mizdow is the winner. Miz takes the trophy cuts a promo about himself.

Out come Rusev and Lana. Lana says the real LOL of the Year is America and the Real Americans. Jack Swagger comes out and says last week Rusev broke Zeb Colter's leg, tonight and at TLC Swagger breaks Rusev's ankle. Rusev and Swagger brawl outside the ring and Swagger gets the upperhand after dropping Rusev ankle first on the barricade. Swagger locks in the Patriot Lock and Rusev is screaming and tapping. Referees pull Swagger off as he screams at Rusev who is screaming in pain.

The Usos and Ryback defeat Kane and Miz/Mizdow when Ryback pins Miz. Mizdow suplex himself during this match twice. Seth Green was on commentary and after the match he tries to raise Ryback's hand in victory but Ryback is SO BIG!!! Usos come in and celebrate with Ryback and Seth Green.

Ricky the Dragon Steamboat comes out to present Match of the Year. Daniel Bryan vs Randy Orton vs Batista, Bray Wyatt vs John Cena Last Man Standing, Shield vs Evolution at Extreme Rules, Team Cena vs Team Authority from Survivor Series. Winner is Team Cena vs. Team Authority. Dolph Ziggler comes out and thanks the fans and Sting.

AJ Lee defeats Summer Rae. Cole did not call her Charlotte.

Rob Van Dam is out to present most Extreme moment of the Year. Brock squashing Cena, Kane tombstones Daniel Bryan all over the arena, Jericho dives from a cage onto Bray Wyatt, Seth curbstomps Dean Ambrose. Winner is Jericho diving from the cage. Jericho isn't here so Fandango and Rosa Mendes come out and Fandango brags about beating Jericho in his debut match which was at Wrestlemania.

Santa Foley is backstage with Elf Noelle shilling merch.

Big Show is interviewed backstage by Renee. He complains about people not forgiving him for thinking Team Cena would lose. He also says that Erick Rowan is out of his league.

Booker T is out to present Superstar of the Year: Brock Lesnar, John Cena, Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, Daniel Bryan, Bray Wyatt, Roman Reigns. Roman Reigns wins and surprise he is here. He says this isn't live via satellite and will be WWE Champion next year because he's grabbing that brass ring.

Chris Jericho is the GM next week.

John Cena defeats Big Show by DQ because Seth and crew interfere. Harper, Rowan, Ryback, Dolph, Kane all come out and get in spots with their gimmick weapons at TLC PPV. In the end Rollins and his bodyguards put Cena through the announce table as all the heels stand tall to end Raw.

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Sigma
Aug 24, 2003

...
Grimey Drawer
Alright Raw, but some great cats.

Writer Cath
Apr 1, 2007

Box. Flipped.
Plaster Town Cop
I think they've forgotten how to end Raw any other way.

Sir Jebus
Feb 9, 2010

The only hero left for man is weed.

awful raw, awful cats.

Hace
Feb 13, 2012

<<Mobius 1, Engage.>>

Sir Jebus posted:

awful raw, awful cats.

All cats are great though??

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009

i had to leave during the charlotte match and missed the rest of the show

KungFu Grip posted:

An ambulance rolls up filled with smoke and out from the shining light inside appears Dean Ambrose in a neck brace.

was this as funny as it sounds

Sir Jebus
Feb 9, 2010

The only hero left for man is weed.

Hace posted:

All cats are great though??

no cats is the best type of cat.

Cardboard Box posted:

i had to leave during the charlotte match and missed the rest of the show


was this as funny as it sounds

no

Blooming Brilliant
Jul 12, 2010

having owned a cat i can confirm cats are assholes

WrasslorMonkey
Mar 5, 2012

Sir Jebus posted:

awful raw, awesome cats.

Sigma
Aug 24, 2003

...
Grimey Drawer

Sir Jebus posted:

awful raw, awful cats.

This post is going to jail

KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008

Cardboard Box posted:

i had to leave during the charlotte match and missed the rest of the show


was this as funny as it sounds

It was actually kind of cool because he was in shadows still and it was like very movie like and the crowd ate it up big time.

NickRoweFillea
Sep 27, 2012

doin thangs
who wants to play sunset overdrive with ya boi

Roman Reigns
Aug 23, 2007

quote:

NXT Preview Match: NXT Women's champion Charlotte is here to promote NXT R Evolution and her title match against Sasha Banks. She loses to Natalya in a short match after a video package hypes her up.

I'm not mad at this anymore just...lost. I just don't understand how this could have worked out the way it did that makes anything, both the performers and the upcoming NXT show, look good.

Chokes McGee
Aug 7, 2008

This is Urotsuki.

Sir Jebus posted:

no cats is the best type of cat.

what's it like to be a broken shell of a human being, i'm honestly curious

KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008

Cardboard Box posted:

i had to leave during the charlotte match and missed the rest of the show


was this as funny as it sounds

Dimebags Brain
Feb 18, 2013





Roman Reigns posted:

I'm not mad at this anymore just...lost. I just don't understand how this could have worked out the way it did that makes anything, both the performers and the upcoming NXT show, look good.

They're just getting Charlotte used to the main roster where the champ loses in garbage three minute matches all the time.

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009


lmao that rules

Shima Honnou
Dec 1, 2010

The Once And Future King Of Dicetroit

College Slice

Not included in the gif, the 30 seconds where it was just a siren and everyone made jokes about it being Cesaro.

Sir Jebus
Feb 9, 2010

The only hero left for man is weed.

Chokes McGee posted:

what's it like to be a broken shell of a human being, i'm honestly curious

it's nice, there's no cats.

i'm allergic to cats


That loving Raw was so pointless I vote we unlock last weeks WWE discussion thread because there's nothing new to talk about.

Retromancer
Aug 21, 2007

Every time I see Goatse, I think of Maureen. That's the last thing I saw. Before I blacked out. The sight of that man's anus.

Taking Randy off TV for this lovely period is probably the best thing for him. I think I legit miss him.

Daniel Bryan
May 23, 2006

GOAT

Sir Jebus posted:

it's nice, there's no cats.

i'm allergic to cats


That loving Raw was so pointless I vote we unlock last weeks WWE discussion thread because there's nothing new to talk about.

You could probably just repost everything said in the WWE Discussion thread the week of Survivor Series and it'd be the same.

Truther Vandross
Jun 17, 2008

Came home, turned on raw, got to the Charlotte match, saw her lose, shut off the DVR box.

This company is so loving stupid.

WrasslorMonkey
Mar 5, 2012

Shima Honnou posted:

Not included in the gif, the 30 seconds where it was just a siren and everyone made jokes about it being Cesaro.

Cesaro literally pushed the ambulance out.

The parking brake was on.

RBX
Jan 2, 2011

lol Reigns won? And mentioned the brass ring? lmaoooo this company. I really hope he isn't buying into their poo poo.

Monkeycheese
Feb 24, 2002

ninja minúsculo
well, I see no reason to even fast forward through this one. Just straight up ignoring this week's Raw

Hace
Feb 13, 2012

<<Mobius 1, Engage.>>

sportsgenius86 posted:

Came home, turned on raw, got to the Charlotte match, saw her lose, shut off the DVR box.

This company is so loving stupid.

uhhh uhhh uhhh let's have her do lovely strikes and then job out in 2 minutes

be sure to watch takeover yall!!

Shrecknet
Jan 2, 2005


still boggling that they're running with the brass ring.

you absolute fuckers.

whenever someone does try and grab it you just bury them harder.

you complete and absolute fuckers.

you cannot grab a brass ring in a show that is written by the people dangling it over you.

NickRoweFillea
Sep 27, 2012

doin thangs

Sir Jebus posted:

it's nice, there's no cats.

i'm allergic to cats


That loving Raw was so pointless I vote we unlock last weeks WWE discussion thread because there's nothing new to talk about.

The thread last week was Real Bad, let's leave it locked and never speak of it again.

Push El Burrito
May 9, 2006

Soiled Meat

Undertaker's getting too old for his weed limo I guess.

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.


WHERE TO, ROB

Charles Gnarwin
Jul 31, 2014

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...


I like that Reigns has been consistent about not giving a poo poo about being Cena's buddy. That would mean the immediate death of his heat.

achillesforever6
Apr 23, 2012

psst you wanna do a communism?

sportsgenius86 posted:

Came home, turned on raw, got to the Charlotte match, saw her lose, shut off the DVR box.

This company is so loving stupid.
https://twitter.com/TripleH/status/542171341877952512
I don't think this was a happy hug HHH

It has to be Dunn or someone trying to sabotage NXT wrestlers, I can't believe that HHH would agree to have a daughter of his idol and friend jobbed out like that unless he was forced by Vince to book it that way.

KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008

Hace posted:

uhhh uhhh uhhh let's have her do lovely strikes and then job out in 2 minutes

be sure to watch takeover yall!!

I thought the chops were good and got the crowd hyped. The reversals to the submissions also had the crowd popping but welp roll up and Charlotte loses.

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007




Grimey Drawer

KungFu Grip posted:

It was actually kind of cool because he was in shadows still and it was like very movie like and the crowd ate it up big time.

Seriously it owned.

Good parts of Raw:

-DEAN AMBROSE WEED AMBULANCE
-Roman looking happy and healthy and cutting a pretty cool promo
-Seth Green
-The ending (it was a clusterfuck but I liked it and it made sense generally as a go-home segment

Bad parts:
-Roman winning Superstar of the Year (though any of The Shield guys were good enough picks, Roman was the worst pick of the three)
-Charlotte getting rolled up in two minutes

Forgettable parts:

-Everything else

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.

achillesforever6 posted:

https://twitter.com/TripleH/status/542171341877952512
I don't think this was a happy hug HHH

It has to be Dunn or someone trying to sabotage NXT wrestlers, I can't believe that HHH would agree to have a daughter of his idol and friend jobbed out like that unless he was forced by Vince to book it that way.

http://instagram.com/p/wXw-fiS1MX/

achillesforever6
Apr 23, 2012

psst you wanna do a communism?
You know TLC is pretty stacked with matches, all the champs are fighting too.

Also watch NXT Takeover which should be better since the build for those matches are all great.

Roman Reigns
Aug 23, 2007

Hace posted:

uhhh uhhh uhhh let's have her do lovely strikes and then job out in 2 minutes

be sure to watch takeover yall!!

Her movements and strikes seemed a little stiff but she was probably nervous. It was still a good match, she was being a great heel, and then it ended in the stupidest way possible.

Dimebags Brain
Feb 18, 2013





Let's not forget

Two Beans
Nov 27, 2003

dabbin' on em
Pillbug

*PSSSSSSSHHHHHHHhhhaaaaaaaa*

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Charles Gnarwin
Jul 31, 2014

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...


achillesforever6 posted:

You know TLC is pretty stacked with matches, all the champs are fighting too.

Also watch NXT Takeover which should be better since the build for those matches are all great.

I'm hoping that Takeover lights a fire under everyone's rear end like Arrival did.

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