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after seeing the last movie today I think it is fair to conclude that the hobbit movies were unnecessary and dumb. I've never read the books so i have no investment to the series or basis for comparison, but just treating the Battle of 5 Armies as its own individual movie it is lovely. worse things about hobbit 3: - one of the most sanitized and sterile movies i can recall. majority of the movie involves massive battles yet the only blood in the film appears whenever an important character is hit, then the blood appears dried on their face. but despite a dude literally being impaled on a sword, then walking around for a while, there is no blood on his body, the ground where he walked or on the sword that stabbed him. When he dies we do see (dried) blood on his face because reasons. I do not understand this because there are multiple decapitations (which, of course, involve no blood). i also don't remember this being a thing with the first three lotr movies - predictable "whew the bad guy is dead..... o poo poo he is actually not dead!!!!" and multiple instances of "now i have a good guy in my grasp, i will savor the moment and smugly smirk at them instead of killing them o poo poo their friend just killed me" - retarded legolas poo poo. even worse than the first movies. at one point he throws a sword through someone's head, despite being a good 20 feet below that person. the trajectory of that sword made zero sense, it's like the sword flies in a straight line like an arrow or some poo poo. also, he literally jumps on rocks that are falling like loving mario. also the fact that since we know legolas is in the last movies there is no suspense involved in his scenes. same thing with bilbo baggins. at least I didn't know which dwarves survives, but i actually didnt give a poo poo about any of them so whatever. - because so many people liked the Giant Eagles Deus Ex Machina in the first movies, they decided to have them again! literally a few dozen giant eagles routed an entire army of orcs, despite the fact that one dude with a big arrow killed a dragon earlier in the movie. like, the orcs are incapable of killing the eagles without the nazghuls or whatever. - speaking of animals, apparently if an animal runs fast it is impervious to weapons. Douche Elf Guy is riding a giant rear end elk, and just trampling over dozens of orcs armed with huge fuckin weapons and poo poo. Dwarves ride bigass rams through hordes of enemies without breaking a sweat. this was a problem in the first movies as well, seeing as how cavalry can just charge through huge swaths of enemies and orcs just bounce harmlessly off them. i'm not expecting historically accurate battles and poo poo, but this is ridiculous. - so much CGI. the great things about the first movies was the fact that there was a balance between CGI and live action. this movie rivalled Attack of the Clones with how much retarded CGI there was. good things about hobbit 3: -soundtrack -evangeline lily is in it - it was shorter than pretty much every other lotr movie It's eerie how closely these movies resemble the new star wars trilogy. dumbed down, targeted to children (literal children, instead of manchildren), plot no one really cares about, excessive cgi. I'm surprised there's not a line of toys. I guess Peter Jackson did not have enough money in conclusion, gently caress this gay middle earth
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:04 |
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# ? Apr 25, 2024 08:29 |
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lord of the rings is a landmark book for the world it creates but the actual writing and story are turds if you have any doubts of this *an elf princess uses magic at the last minute to turn this into a post you like even though at no point had it previously been alluded to that they had this power* i liked the hobbit better than the trilogy but it shouldve just been 1 movie and also the only movie they bothered to make
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:07 |
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Disillusionist posted:after seeing the last movie today I think it is fair to conclude that the hobbit movies were unnecessary and dumb. I've never read the books so i have no investment to the series or basis for comparison, but just treating the Battle of 5 Armies as its own individual movie it is lovely. Watch the old cartoon it was a really good adaptation and only like 55 minutes in length.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:08 |
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imagine a golden dwarf collapsing on a dragon forever
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:09 |
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i really liked the adaption of the whole riddles in the dark gollum finding the ring thing, too bad about the rest of the hobbit
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:09 |
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they turned a 235 page book into three movies, and no one involved enjoyed it. The analogy is pretty close
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:09 |
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its like the prequel trilogy in every way, including being better than the original trilogy
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:10 |
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actually anything taken pretty much verbatim from the hobbit book directly involving bilbo thats not an action scene is generally pretty decent
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:10 |
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Seriously this poo poo is way better: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xhrzbc_hobbit-1977-part-i_shortfilms
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:10 |
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actually the hobbit trilogy is the prequel to star wars middle earth is naboo
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:11 |
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Sheng-ji Yang posted:actually anything taken pretty much verbatim from the hobbit book directly involving bilbo thats not an action scene is generally pretty decent Definitely. I can't wait to see it edited down to a single 3 hour movie. Still, there are a few scenes with Bilbo that I think could have been a lot better. The back and forth between Smaug and Bilbo in the book/cartoon was really good but I was disappointed with it in the Peter Jackson film.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:12 |
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:13 |
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the problems it has are all the same ones the lotr films had, it's not qualitatively different mainly that the desire to please all audiences prevents it from having a consistent tone, and the constant shifts between "grim serious epic" and "fun adventure movie for kids" feel jarring and schizophrenic they'd all be better films if they'd picked one or the other and stuck with it, regardless of which one was chosen
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:16 |
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Stoic Commie posted:actually the hobbit trilogy is the prequel to star wars does that mean that the heroin addict and darth vader fought in mount doom?
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:16 |
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Well, the eagles WERE in the books
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:17 |
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Mumpy Puffinz posted:does that mean that the heroin addict and darth vader fought in mount doom? um no it was thousands and thousands of years later and after elves mated with middlemen and made modern humans and went extinct jedi were humans born with mutated elf genes i thought most people knew this
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:19 |
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I said it myself
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:19 |
They didn't understand that they shouldn't try to make an epic like lotr The hobbit is a more lighthearted tale
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:21 |
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has anyone pointed out the dudes name is bilbo where the gently caress is that backwards text guy oblib
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:24 |
terminator 2 is the star wars prequels of terminator
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:24 |
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gary oldmans diary posted:has anyone pointed out the dudes name is bilbo it's funny cause it close to dildo
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:25 |
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Clipperton posted:terminator 2 is the star wars prequels of terminator hasta la vista poo poo head
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:25 |
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So, what is p jack gonna ruin next?
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:26 |
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Mumpy Puffinz posted:it's funny cause it close to dildo
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:26 |
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gary oldmans diary posted:has anyone pointed out the dudes name is bilbo
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:27 |
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gary oldmans diary posted:every time the name is mentioned i learn about a new level it works on the best part is he lives in Bag-end
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:29 |
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My porn name is going to be Fatty Buldger.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:31 |
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Disillusionist posted:after seeing the last movie today I think it is fair to conclude that the hobbit movies were unnecessary and dumb. I've never read the books so i have no investment to the series or basis for comparison, but just treating the Battle of 5 Armies as its own individual movie it is lovely. Well, the original Hobbit was one book and you could read it cover to cover in less time than it takes to watch one of the movies and it literally was made for children, in case that explains anything. After that book Tolkien decided to go all grimdark with LOTR and oh no the magic ring that Bilbo found turns out is EEEEEEVILLLLLL. Sephiroth_IRA posted:Definitely. I can't wait to see it edited down to a single 3 hour movie. Still, there are a few scenes with Bilbo that I think could have been a lot better. The back and forth between Smaug and Bilbo in the book/cartoon was really good but I was disappointed with it in the Peter Jackson film. I haven't seen the third movie and have no plans to do so anytime soon, but the second movie could have been removed entirely and almost nothing of value would have been lost.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:32 |
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Eonwe posted:They didn't understand that they shouldn't try to make an epic like lotr They understood exactly what they were doing. It's not important to make a good movie, just one that people go see, and if one, why not three?
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:34 |
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I wsh they had put in the part where yoda says "DynoMIIIIITE!!" and hi-fives the dragon
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:34 |
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I barely remember it now that I think about it. I know I couldn't wait for the barrel/dragon chase scenes to be over with.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:35 |
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i thought it was really cool. the high framerate was essential in order to get the most realistic view of legolas' heavily made up face
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:37 |
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So without spoiling too much do they give Bilbo something to do besides commentary during the battle of five armies? Because my guess is that battle is going to be 1.5 hours long.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:37 |
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its like the star wars prequals if the original star wars sucked and were boring as f*ck
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:38 |
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Sephiroth_IRA posted:So without spoiling too much do they give Bilbo something to do besides commentary during the battle of five armies? Because my guess is that battle is going to be 1.5 hours long. he twitches his nose a lot
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:38 |
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a hole-y ghost posted:i thought it was really cool. the high framerate was essential in order to get the most realistic view of legolas' heavily made up face Unless they literally packed fake muscle on him somehow Orlando got hella thicker for the new trilogy than the old, they should have just went with it instead of photoshopping him like a covergirl model
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:38 |
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I'm not gay okay I can just appreciate a supple elfman butt in breeches j/s
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:40 |
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ive heard galadriel kamehameha's sauron back into mordor. if thats true its all worth it.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:40 |
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a hole-y ghost posted:he twitches his nose a lot
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:41 |
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# ? Apr 25, 2024 08:29 |
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Grondoth posted:Well, the eagles WERE in the books And literally did exactly what they did in the film. In the book the Eagles showed up and the war was over, least the movie gave other poo poo going on. Plus Lee Pace on a war moose.
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# ? Dec 20, 2014 00:41 |