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i stow my bag and coat in my cubby hole and glance over to my left to see this bitch Clarissa droppin three perc 10s right before finger painting class.
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Dec 23, 2014 00:44
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| # ? Apr 16, 2024 22:15 |
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Carlos, 4 years old, just asked if i was "holding" 
a creepy colon fucked around with this message at 00:48 on Dec 23, 2014 |
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Dec 23, 2014 00:45
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i cant make it to nap time without a xan bar get off my case bitch
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Dec 23, 2014 00:45
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Ehh, not the greatest concept for a thread imho.
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Dec 23, 2014 00:46
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Great, so its snack time and one of these drat junkies swiped my lunchables again. Im lookin in Rebecca's direction but shes currently in the corner dippin and not very responsive
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Dec 23, 2014 00:49
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shes drooling cheeto colored spittle all over her Dora The Explorer shirt... pathetic. Whens recess already, i gotta get outta here
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Dec 23, 2014 00:50
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there are kids taking drugs everywhere around here. oh no. did i do it right?
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Dec 23, 2014 00:53
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alcoholic toddlers runnin' the joint.a creepy colon posted:Great, so its snack time and one of these drat junkies swiped my lunchables again. Im lookin in Rebecca's direction but shes currently in the corner dippin and not very responsive
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Dec 23, 2014 00:54
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Recess time and I cant even hang on the monkey bars without Cindy askin me for a hit. I told her a million times, i dont use during school hours but this bitch wanna have a selective memory. I tell her to check inside for some undiluted fentanyl i left in my spongebob back pack. if she cuts it right, should last her a few weeks i say
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Dec 23, 2014 00:58
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this is me punching ur thread 
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Dec 23, 2014 01:00
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after laughing at a fellow kid who's balling his eyes out at the prospect of leaving home I smash the back of my head on concrete after slipping on the icy playground explains how I came here I guess
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Dec 23, 2014 01:00
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a creepy colon trolling the preschool for drugs. How low can you get.
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Dec 23, 2014 01:03
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i dont know who got into the acid we were saving for my birthday but I woke up from nap time with loving Thomas of all kids standing over me, half naked, twirling glow sticks around his head. Rebbeca woke up from her nod and dropped some ecstasy and now shes dancing with the giant Doc McStuffins Doll, bitch cray. lights are down and its like a rave in here
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Dec 23, 2014 01:07
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haha roleplay is so gay except when we do it because we spent ten dollars
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Dec 23, 2014 01:09
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ArtIsResistance posted:haha roleplay is so gay except when we do it because we spent ten dollars no, it's still gay.
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Dec 23, 2014 01:14
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my job is great b/c the kids are always holding and will hook u up if u give them extra graham crackers at snack time
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Dec 23, 2014 01:15
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GET HIGH WATCH CARTOONS
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Dec 23, 2014 01:18
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"I need my smack, and I need it now."
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Dec 23, 2014 01:19
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whats their usernames
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Dec 23, 2014 01:19
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gonna have to create a new status that reads permanap
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Dec 23, 2014 01:21
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for real, little kids are on adderall all the time. they act like it too. the little speedheads talk more than other kids and cant sit still for poo poo until you give them something to do.
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Dec 23, 2014 01:21
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WILDTURKEY101 posted:the little speedheads talk more than other kids and cant sit still for poo poo until you give them something to do.
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Dec 23, 2014 01:31
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At a recent baby shower, a four year old was telling me about slender man.
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Dec 23, 2014 01:34
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Yeh I passed 2nd grade, yeh I eat rear end, problem?
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Dec 23, 2014 01:41
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interwhat posted:At a recent baby shower, a four year old was telling me about slender man.
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Dec 23, 2014 01:42
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A four year old sold me an eightball then hosed my girl
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Dec 23, 2014 01:51
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first day of preschool all the little girls wearing leggings, good job mom and dad
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Dec 23, 2014 02:36
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You work with children hahahahHhHahhHha
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Dec 23, 2014 02:41
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interwhat posted:At a recent baby shower, a four year old was telling me about slender man. tell them about aatrek if they want to hear something really scarry 
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Dec 23, 2014 02:42
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interwhat posted:At a recent baby shower, a four year old was telling me about slender man. sick gently caress...
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Dec 23, 2014 02:43
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touch the children
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Dec 23, 2014 02:49
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Smoke PCP life turns into cartoons
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Dec 23, 2014 02:52
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You know, you guys laugh but there really was a 10 year old when I was a young lad who was moving product. Inbetween grade 6 and 11 he was in Juv 4 times for possession. Saw him last in Colombia 3 years ago during the heyday of the Colombian oil boom while at investor conference. He found found a really good calling in FARC consulting, and now is a respected member of a government body, not to DOX him too hard but he turned out allright. Saved many kidnapping victims due to his ability to walk the line and navigate the Zeta/old-Noriega routes. Jay Z is right, hard knock hustln' is a pretty good business degree. Merry Xmas, bitches.
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Dec 23, 2014 02:54
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Me and Jeb ducked out during recess and I heated up a batch of fine china. I rolled back my left sleeve, exposing a slew of track-marks, and got ready to take my hit by tying a shoelace I stole from some shoes in the cubby around my upper arm. Jeb was a lightweight - he only weighed 45 pounds for gosh sake - but I wanted him to have a good time. I loaded up two huge hits, about 60mg, of this sick smack into my needle that I stole from a medical waste bin. I slammed more than half, and handed the shoelace to Jeb. "I don't know, I don't think I want to bang it anymore. I don't like needles; needles hurt, they scare me, I can't do it." "Ok," I said, "Pull down your pants." Jeb was hesitant, but eager to join the cool kids who did drugs. He knew the only way was to show off to everyone how high he was during reading time, and he wanted to be boyfriend-girlfriend with Heidi, who also did H regularly. I pulled his underwear down a little bit because I didn't want to touch his peener - eew - and poked the needle in just to the left of his groin. "Ow, it hurts," he whined. "Just don't look, I'll find it soon and recess is almost over." A slight increase in resistance and a dash of blood in the syringe told me I had found the femoral vein, and I was careful not to poke through it. I pushed down the plunger and emptied the rest of the dope into Jeb. It was already hitting me hard by this time, and I was having trouble formulating my thoughts and speech. I was engulfed by a tidal wave of euphoria, a whitewater of warm pleasure pulsating throughout my whole body, just as the playground monitor called out. "Everyone inside! I see all you kids over by the jungle gym! Why are you all coughing? Are you all sick? Just get inside, the bell rang five minutes ago and it's like no one even heard it!" I was on my way to the building and I couldn't even remember 30 seconds ago. All I could think of was the feeling, and I couldn't get the smile off my face even if I wanted to. The rest of the day was a haze, and the teacher said she couldn't even wake me up from nap time, so she let me sleep until the buses came. As our class stumbled, giggled, and babbled nonsense on the way to our parents' cars, our eyes were drawn to flashing lights on down on the playground. They were coming from the crick, near the foot-bridge that the poor kids who's parents couldn't drive or even buy them crack crossed while they walked to school. Most of the other children ignored it, snickering, and joking about Pat's mom getting busted again. But I was drawn away from the line of humming vehicle engines and shiny mini-vans, my smirk finally leaving my face, though I was still high as heck. We were under the bridge, weren't we? Where was he, where was Jeb? As I walked near the crick, a giant man with black boots walked up to me and spoke with a booming voice. "You can't be down here kid, no one can come through here right now. Someone's hurt, you have to go back the other way." I shook my head and the giant blue man walked towards the other side of the path, where some kids, all tripping on boomers, were obliviously pointing and waving at a weeping willow tree as it blew in the wind. I disobeyed the man, I walked closer to the bridge, peering down to the crick. I saw him there. A man wearing all green with purple gloves on, crouched over something. I moved closer. There he was. His face turned sideways in the mud, tongue snaking between his lips and his skin the color of the marker we use to color in the sky or the cookie monster during drawing time. His butt was in the air, his arms bent in a weird way, and his knees were propping up his legs and torso in the shape of a "V". I was so high, I started laughing because his butt was sticking in the air. He probably farted when he was like that. I walked back up to my mum's car. I failed in my attempts to open the door of the Mazda crossover several times before she opened it for me. "Hay babe, did you have a fun day in school?" The car was fumigated with the smell and smoke of a dank blunt, which she handed to me as she spoke. I took the smoldering bluntski, still involuntarily giggling as I replied, "I... I, yeah it... I was fun." She let out a long laugh, followed by a coughing fit. "You tried out that poo poo mommy gave you, huh? So how was it?" The smile crept back over my face as I exhaled my second hit. "It was the loving madman." Acid Haze fucked around with this message at 03:41 on Dec 23, 2014 |
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Dec 23, 2014 03:31
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Snatch Duster posted:You work with children hahahahHhHahhHha i don't think anyone in this thread does, if so shame on them for wasting their life. you def shouldn't because of your pedo urges that you were posting about
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Dec 23, 2014 03:33
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Whirlwind Jones posted:Ehh, not the greatest concept for a thread imho. improv comedy troupe level poo poo here imo
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Dec 23, 2014 03:54
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Stoic Commie posted:i don't think anyone in this thread does, if so shame on them for wasting their life. you def shouldn't because of your pedo urges that you were posting about i teach at a preschool and this thread is p funny
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Dec 23, 2014 03:58
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GrrrlSweatshirt posted:i teach at a preschool and this thread is p funny Good job wasting your life.
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Dec 23, 2014 04:03
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Snatch Duster posted:Good job wasting your life. hey that thread about the girl and her boyfriend who likes comedians was ace, good job
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Dec 23, 2014 04:14
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| # ? Apr 16, 2024 22:15 |
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I remember reading about the cartels pushing diluted heroin in schools for like $2 to $3 and I figured it was an urban legend. Turns out it was real and it was called cheese and they diluted it with tylenol PM. The main source of distribution was rainbow parties and if you didn't try the first hit (which was free) an undocumented child would place a temporary tattoo on your arm laced with LSD which would cause disorientation making you an easy target for the cartel hitman who would hide under Kia's waiting to slice the Achilles tendon of anyone who walked by.
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Dec 23, 2014 04:15
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