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I think pelican-guy may still have some contraband stashed upon his person.. somewhere.
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Dec 28, 2014 17:55
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GiantAmazonianOtter posted:I wish his micropenis was as MASSIVE as his gaming rig. Do you seriously? Is a micropenis an issue? Does penis size really matter?
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Dec 28, 2014 18:00
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Fandyien posted:about four years ago someone robbed my house, and i'm like 99% sure it was someone i know. all they stole was my laptop, specifically, but they kicked in the door and broke a window to do it. they also left my half ounce of weed, carton of cigarettes, and 15 vicodin Thieves are typically someone local, like teenagers, and they usually see themselves as being clever for doing so. When it isn't children, then the next likely candidate is drug addicts. Although you do have to watch out for organized rings of thieves.
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Dec 28, 2014 18:33
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few years back someone busted into my exgf's car and stole an iphone, a cheap camera and a few bucks in change. Somehow they missed a deposit bag with nearly 5 grand in cash in the glove compartment(she was responsible for the night deposits at her secretarial job, before anyone asks if she was a whore. though in fact she was something of a whore, but not a good enough one to make 5 gs in a week)
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Dec 28, 2014 18:48
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I had a place in Richmond Va that was broken into while I was at the hospital watching my baby flop into the world. Some stuff they didn't touch: Six guitars worth from 350 to 2500 bux. A new $4000 PA head, and a bunch of amps and speaker cabs sitting by the door they left through. An effects rack {with handles on it) full of around 6K worth of compressors and poo poo. Full set of Pearl drums, a handgun, some game consoles, and a couple of crates full of high end mics and a couple wireless rigs. What they took: An ancient heavy rear end 19" TV. 6 disc CD changer. $50 micorwave. Leather jacket, a pack of disposable razors, and half the food in the fridge. I mean maybe they didn't have a big enough car, but a couple of amps would have weighed less than the TV and they could have bought a proper burglar truck or two from pawning them. When the cops came and saw what wasn't stolen, I think the were kinda pissed I bothered calling them.
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Dec 28, 2014 19:09
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utterlycorrupt posted:few years back someone busted into my exgf's car and stole an iphone, a cheap camera and a few bucks in change. Somehow they missed a deposit bag with nearly 5 grand in cash in the glove compartment(she was responsible for the night deposits at her secretarial job, before anyone asks if she was a whore. though in fact she was something of a whore, but not a good enough one to make 5 gs in a week)
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Dec 28, 2014 19:09
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Khorne posted:Why would you leave any of that in a car? this was my first question as well. evidently this happened really quick, she stopped to pick up a few things at the grocery store and when she got back the window was smashed and the stuff was gone. she was rather stupid i suppose--she was dating me at the time, after all
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Dec 28, 2014 19:24
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Frankenstyle posted:I had a place in Richmond Va that was broken into while I was at the hospital watching my baby flop into the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHqzF_btfYk "Amplifier"
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Dec 28, 2014 19:37
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Now adding boyfriend's lovely £1 mint shower gel to the list. For fucks sake.
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Dec 28, 2014 20:46
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About four years ago somebody smashed the window on my brother's car just to steal a mid-90s era portable CD player and tape adapter. The CD in it wasn't even worth anything as it was a recording of some local avant-garde concert. The CD player was buried under a pile of paper so the thief probably saw the wire from the tape adapter going under there and though he was getting an iPhone or iPod. That window cost $200 to replace and I guarantee that the CD player ended up tossed in the trash or gutter. There was also a case where some kids went through my neighborhood at night stealing change and other random junk out of unlocked cars. One of the neighbors said that they stole about $1.50 in assorted change from a cup holder, but left $90 in actual paper cash that was just behind it.
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Dec 28, 2014 21:56
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GiantAmazonianOtter posted:Now adding boyfriend's lovely £1 mint shower gel to the list. For fucks sake. gently caress you that stuff isn't lovely it's great value
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Dec 28, 2014 22:23
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Op do you have a picture of your boyfriend and his tasteful leather purse?
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Dec 28, 2014 22:37
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I have rear end burglars syndrome
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Dec 28, 2014 23:10
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op strokes her boyfriends MASSIVE computer rig then surprises him by licking her finger and inserting it into the ethernet cable port
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Dec 28, 2014 23:23
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how do you know it's a her? gotta be careful with those pronouns in 2014 TYOOL
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Dec 28, 2014 23:31
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Ok, seriously though, penis size doesn't matter, right?
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Dec 28, 2014 23:34
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Nubile Hillock posted:I have rear end burglars syndrome
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Dec 28, 2014 23:44
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When you ask your bf does he say it's a satchel or a goodie bag
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Dec 29, 2014 00:11
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someone stole my moms gps from her car and she was like "those burglars arent too smart, they didnt even take the change from the cupholder" who the gently caress wants change. if i break into a car i'll loving leave any change i have on me.
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Dec 29, 2014 00:17
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I'm burgin' hard
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Dec 29, 2014 01:28
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Your BF sounds like a bad protector. Hit me up via PM if you want a real man who can handle business, in the bedroom, the boardroom, in the streets, and otherwise. 
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Dec 29, 2014 02:00
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A few years ago some assholes broke in my house and stole a bunch of random poo poo including the thanksgiving turkey I was thawing in a cooler outside. I didn't really care about the old DVDs and iPod but who the gently caress steals a turkey?
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Dec 29, 2014 12:02
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Someone desperate?
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Dec 29, 2014 14:19
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calusari posted:
d'awww, maybe one day he'll be a real criminal.  lmao 42 year old woman 18 year old dude when he could at least be scoring with 19 year old skinny crack hos
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Dec 29, 2014 15:05
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At this point I'm surprised we've still got toilet paper and washing up liquid.
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Dec 29, 2014 15:24
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I cnat believe the burgerlgs left the boyfriend's MASSIVE computer rig and throttle untouched, h aha!
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Dec 29, 2014 15:38
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utterlycorrupt posted:few years back someone busted into my exgf's car and stole an iphone, a cheap camera and a few bucks in change. Somehow they missed a deposit bag with nearly 5 grand in cash in the glove compartment(she was responsible for the night deposits at her secretarial job, before anyone asks if she was a whore. though in fact she was something of a whore, but not a good enough one to make 5 gs in a week) Nice to hear that your bad whore ex got robbed, lol.
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Dec 29, 2014 15:41
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ive had two breakins. once i wasnt there but my roommates scary loving boyfriend was and just scared him away with his full body tattoos (from what he said, he walked in the bedroom then ran away and nobody said a word) second time i was alone and they opened the front door and came in and i got up and then they ran away my roommate was also shot multiple times but that was probably unrelated
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Dec 29, 2014 16:02
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Hirez posted:This is how I afford my crack habit... fill up then zoom out with my cart Schoolboy Q spotted
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Dec 29, 2014 16:21
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1gnoirents posted:ive had two breakins. once i wasnt there but my roommates scary loving boyfriend was and just scared him away with his full body tattoos (from what he said, he walked in the bedroom then ran away and nobody said a word) why did you shoot your roommate
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Dec 29, 2014 16:21
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1gnoirents posted:ive had two breakins. once i wasnt there but my roommates scary loving boyfriend was and just scared him away with his full body tattoos (from what he said, he walked in the bedroom then ran away and nobody said a word) rename me Silent Tattoo Frigthener
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Dec 29, 2014 16:23
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Rename me full body breakin
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Dec 29, 2014 16:24
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Tiny Lowtax posted:Op do you have a picture of your boyfriend and his tasteful leather purse? 
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Dec 29, 2014 16:25
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rename me bicep barbwire beatdown
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Dec 29, 2014 16:38
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Necros posted:rename me bicep barbwire beatdown actually, rename me breakin-blocking bicep barbwire bro.
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Dec 29, 2014 16:40
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I'd steal that rig. pc master race ftw
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Dec 29, 2014 16:57
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Real men run the big gaming rigs
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Dec 29, 2014 17:11
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Someone slept in my unlocked car about 6 months ago and dug through my center console, probably looking for loot. There were only charging cords, Altoids, and tissues in there, so he just left a beer can full of piss on the floor and knocked my maps out of the door pocket where they got soaked in the rain.
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Dec 29, 2014 17:37
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Your boyfriend seems to own a lot of lovely stuff. If you disrespect his possessions so much, are you sure he's the right one for you?
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Dec 29, 2014 17:50
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sounds like you have an admirer OP. One that wants to dress and smell like you.
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Dec 29, 2014 18:34
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