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Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013
My allegiance is to Somethingawful, to democracy! Lowtax is evil!

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gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005
cis lords are our spec-i-al-ity

Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013

gary oldmans diary posted:

cis lords are our spec-i-al-ity

A cis LAWWWWWRD? Let's walk slowly because there is no urgency to stop him.

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

I am Toni Lippi
Aug 16, 2004
No mods. No Managers.

Gravitas Shortfall
Jul 17, 2007

Utility is seven-eighths Proximity.


something something Aatrek something something Younglings

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW
Mods are good though. It's all of the posters who are horrible. Without their iron fist this place would be disgusting.

gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005

fuccboi
Jan 5, 2004

by zen death robot
It's treason then *full page of fyad 6 hour probations*

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

Hobohemian posted:

Mods are good though. It's all of the posters who are horrible. Without their iron fist this place would be disgusting.

my irony meter is broken, I can't tell how many times past sincere this is orbiting around

Plafop
Oct 11, 2012

by Ralp
He's a moderator
On the internet
On a comedy message board
He does it for free
He takes his "job" very seriously
He does it because it is the only amount of power and control he will ever have in his pathetic life
He closes threads he doesn't like because whenever he gets upset he has an asthma attack
He closes threads he doesn't like because they interfere with the large backlog of little girl chinese cartoons he still has to watch
He will never have a real job
He will never move out of his parent's house
He will never be at a healthy weight
He will never know how to cook anything besides a hot pocket
He will never have a girlfriend
He will never have any friends

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW

Spanish Manlove posted:

my irony meter is broken, I can't tell how many times past sincere this is orbiting around

It's not ironic at all. I wouldn't even bother with SA without mods.

jalopybrown
Oct 11, 2012

Plafop posted:

He's a moderator
On the internet
On a comedy message board
He does it for free
He takes his "job" very seriously
He does it because it is the only amount of power and control he will ever have in his pathetic life
He closes threads he doesn't like because whenever he gets upset he has an asthma attack
He closes threads he doesn't like because they interfere with the large backlog of little girl chinese cartoons he still has to watch
He will never have a real job
He will never move out of his parent's house
He will never be at a healthy weight
He will never know how to cook anything besides a hot pocket
He will never have a girlfriend
He will never have any friends

We should have big man tyrone remake https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdC_Cu9X4wc but SA'd

Windows 98
Nov 13, 2005

HTTP 400: Bad post
Lowtax isn't even a mod, dude.

Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013

Windows 98 posted:

Lowtax isn't even a mod, dude.


He promised to teach me how to cheat bans and probation.

Dead Precedents
May 5, 2005

Precedents come and go, but death goes on forever.

Hingehead posted:

He promised to teach me how to cheat bans and probation.

That was Lowtax's evil twin: Hightax

TASTE THE PAIN!!
May 18, 2004

YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE

Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013
I banned them.....I banned them all.....every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women and the children too! They were like idiots....and I banned them like idiots! I HATE THEM! I will become the greatest mod ever. I will even learn to stop people from banning!

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN
I find your lack of faith disturbing.

Wicker Man
Sep 5, 2007

Just like Columbus...


Clapping Larry

Spanish Manlove posted:

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

*Force Chokes balls*

No. 6
Jun 30, 2002

Wicker Man posted:

*Force Chokes balls*

*force fingers your anus*

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!

Spanish Manlove posted:

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

Hail Satan

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

Wicker Man posted:

*Force Chokes balls*

...He's more machine now than man.

DONKEY SALAMI
Jun 28, 2008

donkey? donkey?

I kind of think of mods more like the Jedi round table.

They have powers. But they're happier screwing around so huge evil has to stare them in the face for them to sober up for a bit. Then some light saber swinging. Maybe levitate an apple. Then screw it and go into hiding

gnarlyhotep
Sep 30, 2008

by Lowtax
Oven Wrangler
mods are your friends :)

Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013

gnarlyhotep posted:

mods are your friends :)


No.....it can't be.....I can't watch anymore...... how could it come to this? Destroy the mods,we must.

gnarlyhotep
Sep 30, 2008

by Lowtax
Oven Wrangler
it's not me and Franco you have to worry about

it's forbidden lesbian, the quiet one

she's biding her time to bring the righteous hammer down and god help us I don't think anyone will be able to stop her

Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013

gnarlyhotep posted:

it's not me and Franco you have to worry about

it's forbidden lesbian, the quiet one

she's biding her time to bring the righteous hammer down and god help us I don't think anyone will be able to stop her


So this is how democracy dies.....with thunderous banhammers.

Gunky Junket
Oct 30, 2014

by Ralp

Plafop posted:

He will never have a girlfriend

*looks @ Franco* I dunno, darl.. I'm just not sure if we can make it work. I adore you, it's just.. complicated. I want it to work, I'm just not sure if it will.

Spanish Manlove posted:

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

Dawww.. okay, I'll try harder then, babe.. anything for you! :D

Dave_Indeed
Feb 22, 2004

by FactsAreUseless
Lowtax peaked in the late 90's when he trolled Everquest. Best article ever.

DING! Level 1!

Glasgow Kiss
Dec 12, 2007

Oh, put that thing away, Samurai. We all know what's going to happen. You'll swing your sword, I'll fly away, and probably say something like, "I'll be back, Samurai!" And then I'll flutter over the horizon and we probably won't see each for... about a week. And then we'll do the same thing again.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWsyXJvlrJg

gnarlyhotep
Sep 30, 2008

by Lowtax
Oven Wrangler

I love that movie

"I didn't sell out, I bought in"

az
Dec 2, 2005

He gazed up at the enormous face. Fourteen years it had taken him to learn what kind of smile was hidden beneath the dark shadows under his eyes. O cruel, needless misunderstanding! O stubborn, self-willed exile from the loving breast! Two cheeto-scented tears trickled down the sides of his nose. But it was all right, everything was all right, the struggle was finished. He had won the victory over himself. He loved Lowtax.

RainMaker
Oct 25, 2012

This is me every time you post.

Hingehead posted:

So this is how democracy dies.....with thunderous banhammers.

So this is how poo poo posting dies.....with thunderous banhammers.

gnarlyhotep
Sep 30, 2008

by Lowtax
Oven Wrangler

RainMaker posted:

So this is how poo poo posting dies.....with thunderous banhammers.

don't get too happy there spanky

Egbert Souse
Nov 6, 2008

Hail Modra!

Lord of Pie
Mar 2, 2007


Hobohemian posted:

Mods are good though. It's all of the posters who are horrible. Without their iron fist this place would be disgusting.

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

this but with his face shopped in

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnwkE4trA48

Hingehead
Nov 24, 2013



AAtrek, you turned to the Dark Side. That you....molested Younglings! I don't believe what I'm hearing! . You've changed! You have turned to the dark side! You're not AAtrek anymore! You're breaking my heart! You're going down a path I cannot follow!

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Slurin
Jul 17, 2008
I am a coward who makes grandiose claims and then runs away when asked for evidence. Please ignore everything I have to say.

Plafop posted:

He's a moderator
On the internet
On a comedy message board
He does it for free
He takes his "job" very seriously
He does it because it is the only amount of power and control he will ever have in his pathetic life
He closes threads he doesn't like because whenever he gets upset he has an asthma attack
He closes threads he doesn't like because they interfere with the large backlog of little girl chinese cartoons he still has to watch
He will never have a real job
He will never move out of his parent's house
He will never be at a healthy weight
He will never know how to cook anything besides a hot pocket
He will never have a girlfriend
He will never have any friends

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