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2014 was a downer year at the box office, with admissions at the lowest level since 1995. Despite that, studios are still ranking in the money, and several films that were slated for 2014 got delayed for 2015 due to various reasons. 2015 is a year that a bajillion think pieces were written about how the box office will die, because 99% of the people who write on the internet just copies what other people write instead of coming up with their own ideas. Needless to say, I don't believe the box office will implode in 2015, but there will be some huge stinkers dropped. Let us remember the fun times of 2014: I, Frankenstein - Shockingly enough, people didn't turn out for Frankenstein vs. Gargoyles: The Movie. Robocop - Despite an interesting director and Evil Steve Jobs, the film was hampered by loosely following the original's plot with War on Terror/drones elements. Two Hercules flicks - Neither Hercules movie actually had Hercules in it. One had some kid's origin story, the other a reluctant fighter. Jack Ryan - Enough reboots of this franchise already, can it just die? Pompeii - Another disaster movie that was a disaster. A Million Ways to Die in the West - A Seth MacFarlane joint that disappointed everyone. But he'll be back in Ted 2 later this year! Sin City 2 - The long-delayed sequel took so long that the original aged badly and several actors died between films. Transcendence - The Johnny Depp ship has sunk, and this film is the guy who punches out women and children to get to the lifeboat first Never forget that Transformers 4 made a billion dollars. Deadline has a cool studio by studio breakdown, including Universal getting record profits despite having no blockbuster budget films in 2014 (they will have some in 2015, though) Coming in 2015: Project Almanac - It's Back to the Future 2 in found footage form! Mysteriously postponed until January because that means quality. Taken 3 - Only two more Takens and Liam Neeson gets a free sub sandwich! Mortdecai - Johnny Depp returns from the bottom of the sea to drag down more victims! Run, run while you still can! Jupiter Ascending - Another 2014 refugee, this time Channing Tatum is a space dog and the Wachowskis will cause a flame war between the people who love it and hate it. I'm looking forward to it, but also expecting it to bomb and no one to like it at all. Seventh Son - Described as a Harry Potter ripoff, but has an evil Julianne Moore and a homeless Jeff Bridges. Fifty Shades of Grey - The movie you won't be able to escape mentions of. Will it live up to the hype? (No.) Will you get sick of essays from S&M fans complaining about tactical realism? (Yes) Will it suck? (Probably) Will it make lots of money? (Probably as well) And, yes, I'll be there opening weekend. Hot Tub Time Machine 2 - Because YOU demanded it! So far two 2015 time travel movies! Cinderella - The fact the Kenneth Branagh directed live-action Cinderella has had very little hype is worrisome. Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - I enjoy this plot synopsis: "The plot is unknown at this time. " I hope "The Ghost Dimension" becomes the new "Electric Boogaloo" Get Hard - Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart in a comedy where they both play morons and a lot of race and prison rape jokes are dropped means fun drama for everyone! Expect it to make lots of money. Serena - The Jennifer Lawrence/Bradly Cooper gravy train might have derailed, as critics are calling this "average"! Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 - The most anticipated mall cop movie of 2015! Monster Trucks - an animated film they haven't bothered to release a plot synopsis of yet. I don't know if the trucks are monsters or are giant trucks like Bigfoot. Remember when Bigfoot had his own cartoon series? Entourage - I don't care for this series at all, so I care for a movie even less. Terminator Genisys - Probably the worst marketed film of all time, and the worst titled sequel of all time. And yet the trailer was only 30% bad.... I do expect this will disappoint in the box office. Allowed is no, is planet forbidden! Pan - The Peter Pan origin story we all needed. Expect lots of bad essays about the white actors playing American Indian characters who were stereotypes and now are white people pretending to be stereotypes. What I'm saying is you should steer clear of Gawker that week. And every week. The Fantastic Four - Dr. Doom is a blogger. Also Michael B. Jordan and Miles Teller. Can't decide, expect it will disappoint in a year with Avengers 2 and Batman v. Superman. Goosebumps - Jack Black is RL Stine as the Goosebumps monsters come to life. Could be dumb enough to be fun, or not. The Man from U.N.C.L.E. - Superman and Hugh Grant in a comedy reboot of a franchise my parents watched? Put up your umbrella because this bomb is dropping fast! Hotel Transylvania 2 - More animated Adam Sandler means more money for him to make other awful movies. Friday the 13th - Did you know this was getting rebooted again? Do you care? Dirty Grandpa - Someone turned the movie Bad Grandpa into a movie with Robert De Niro as Dirty Grandpa. Television will continue to provide hours of entertainment, as Lifetime is the reigning champion of insane exploitation pictures at the moment. Sharknado 3 will storm into SyFy (which is phasing out the creature movies in favor of actual scripted science fiction programming). And let's not forget Hallmark Channel, which not only is Lifetime Lite, but also has their own dedicated mystery movie channel that will be pumping out new mystery films all year long. For you torture specialists, there's also UPtv, which is Lifetime with 1000% more Jesus. On the DTV front, Asylum will continue breaking out the mockbusters. Avengers Grimm, Hansel vs. Gretel, and more! 2014 2013 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008
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Jan 1, 2015 23:22
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 13:03 |
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Jupiter Ascending is gonna own. 
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Jan 1, 2015 23:31
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quote:Cinderella - The fact the Kenneth Branagh directed live-action Cinderella has had very little hype is worrisome. No loving poo poo.
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Jan 1, 2015 23:39
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As hard as I'll ride for 50 Shades, there's no way I'm going to see that unless somebody drags me to it.
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Jan 1, 2015 23:39
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I love found footage and time travel movies for reasons other than "gripping, smart story" so I guess I'll enjoy Project Almanac!
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Jan 1, 2015 23:44
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precision posted:Jupiter Ascending is gonna own. Sorry, but Jupiter Ascending looks like its going to be a convoluted mess, more focused on worldbuilding than having a coherent plot or interesting characters.
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Jan 2, 2015 00:01
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Welcome to 2015, another year where it looks like pretty much the whole year is going to suck except for a handful of movies. Also I expect 50 Shades to not do poo poo. I seriously do. I feel bad that Kingsman is going right up against it, because that doesn't look half bad, but that's also an adaptation of a limited Mark Millar series. I haven't checked it out but I hope that the people who are adapting it don't just let it be as reprehensible as Kick-rear end 2.
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Jan 2, 2015 00:20
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I'm going to call this early: Jupiter Ascending is going to be the bomb of 2015. It'll be this year's Lone Ranger or John Carter. The only catch is that twelve months from now everyone will have forgotten it exists. I found this jewel trying to see if IMDB had any budget information on it up yet: IMDB Trivia posted:According to the directors, the script was over 600 pages long. Also, 50 Shades is going to flop. The audience isn't going to go out for it, but at least that one has potential to pick them up again at home and is relatively cheap. I doubt the studio is going to be losing money on it.
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Jan 2, 2015 00:34
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Project Almanac looks like Chronicle mixed with Primer.
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Jan 2, 2015 00:49
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Tars Tarkas posted:Cinderella - The fact the Kenneth Branagh directed live-action Cinderella has had very little hype is worrisome. Saw a preview of this today, and it skeeved me out because I don't think the actress playing Cinderella's mom changed her expression once from that rictus grin. And they came back to it, like, twice more. Ick.
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Jan 2, 2015 00:57
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So will the film version of 50 Shades have the fisting? Doesn't the book have fisting? This is important.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:15
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I didn't know about, I wanna say half those movies coming this year and every one made me go 'oh noooo' in different, unique ways. Gonna be a great year.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:16
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Tomorrowland is gonna kick rear end, I know that much. The trailer is one of the best I've seen in a long time.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:18
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HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:Tomorrowland is gonna kick rear end, I know that much. The trailer is one of the best I've seen in a long time. This is true, though. Lotta good poo poo on the horizon, lotta crazy dumb poo poo.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:21
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The sex in the book is pretty tame from what I've heard. I'm honestly looking forward to loads of internet males getting really upset at the existence of the 50 Shades movie in a thrilling sequel to the anger over the Twilight movies. Let's see if 50 Shades gets a "Support thread for boyfriends forced to see 50 Shades" like there was for the Twilight movies.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:22
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I will go see Goosebumps. I don't care if the ratings suck.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:23
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So far I haven't seen my Nurse 3D/Vampire Academy/awful garbage of 2015 film that I'm eager to see for no real reason.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:23
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Random Stranger posted:I'm going to call this early: Jupiter Ascending is going to be the bomb of 2015. It'll be this year's Lone Ranger or John Carter. The only catch is that twelve months from now everyone will have forgotten it exists. Will it be long and boring enough to be this year's Cloud Atlas?
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Jan 2, 2015 01:24
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HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:So far I haven't seen my Nurse 3D/Vampire Academy/awful garbage of 2015 film that I'm eager to see for no real reason. Vampire Academy gave us the CHVRCHES cover of "Bela Lugosi's Dead" which is either the best or worst thing about it.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:38
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raditts posted:Will it be long and boring enough to be this year's Cloud Atlas? Well, the original script was 600 pages! 
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Jan 2, 2015 01:39
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Anonymous Zebra posted:The sex in the book is pretty tame from what I've heard. I'm honestly looking forward to loads of internet males getting really upset at the existence of the 50 Shades movie in a thrilling sequel to the anger over the Twilight movies. Let's see if 50 Shades gets a "Support thread for boyfriends forced to see 50 Shades" like there was for the Twilight movies. What's bizarre to me is I had a friend far more sexually experienced than me have to ask me about a bunch of terms/things in the book when she was too scared to google them. It really wasn't stuff that was all that crazy. Also the movie is coming way too late.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:40
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Gone Girl came out in 2011, I believe.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:51
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Groovelord Neato posted:Also the movie is coming way too late. It's meta. Delayed gratification and all that.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:52
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HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:Gone Girl came out in 2011, I believe. 2012 and was still selling like hotcakes when I left the book business in late 2013.
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Jan 2, 2015 01:55
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HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:Tomorrowland is gonna kick rear end, I know that much. The trailer is one of the best I've seen in a long time. The EDM festival? I hope that Jupiter Ascending is good. I was wondering where it went after I saw the trailer.
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Jan 2, 2015 03:12
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It seems obvious from the log line and trailer that Project Almanac will end with a predestination paradox in which the friends attempt to prevent themselves from finding the plans to the time machine but accidentally cause their earlier selves to find them in the first place. Anything that happens for no reason in the first act of a time-travel movie must find its cause near the climax, as I believe Checkov once wrote after being kidnapped and brought to 1988 in order to participate in a high-school history class project. I AM GRANDO fucked around with this message at 03:38 on Jan 2, 2015 |
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Jan 2, 2015 03:35
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BvS is coming out in 2016 now, just as a correction I think 50 Shades will still make some money. Reportedly it has a $40 mil budget, which is nothing, so it should be alright. But I don't think it will do Twilight numbers or anything.
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Jan 2, 2015 05:30
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FlamingLiberal posted:BvS is coming out in 2016 now, just as a correction If you look at the trailers the movie does not really look very good production wise to the relatively low budget isn't surprising. It's not really surprising they're not throwing that much money at this. They know it'll make some money but there's really no way of knowing just how much. This also isn't a movie that's going to get all that much mileage out of a bigger budget anyways.
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Jan 2, 2015 05:33
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I'm waiting for the direct-to-Lifetime Asylum Films knockoff of 50 Shades.
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Jan 2, 2015 05:33
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axleblaze posted:If you look at the trailers the movie does not really look very good production wise to the relatively low budget isn't surprising.
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Jan 2, 2015 05:36
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Luigi Thirty posted:I'm waiting for the direct-to-Lifetime Asylum Films knockoff of 50 Shades. Maybe they can adapt the spinoff that Ashens wrote.
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Jan 2, 2015 05:39
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Goosebumps got bumped to April 2016, (un?)fortunately
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Jan 2, 2015 05:57
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FlamingLiberal posted:I think 50 Shades will still make some money. Reportedly it has a $40 mil budget, which is nothing, so it should be alright. But I don't think it will do Twilight numbers or anything. I think it's going to make money, but not in theaters. My optimistic estimate for it would be a theatrical gross of about $50 to $60 million which after the production budget, marketing campaign, and the various cuts taken out will be a disappointing return for the studio. However, I would not be shocked if the film was in the black before they even started shooting.
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Jan 2, 2015 06:31
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I wish the movie was just 2 hours of the most hardcore bondage sex ever shown on film, and tens of thousands of shocked suburban hausfraus stroll out of the theater halfway through, before falling down on an antique fainting couch placed nearby. Think of the controversy. The studio could just say that they were trying to remain faithful to the source material. Plus, once the cat was out of the bag, you'd manage to get men to go see it, too. It's a win win situation. EDIT: I just read a couple paragraphs of the source material online, and holy poo poo, it makes the Manos: The Hands of Fate script seem like Ernest Hemingway. Gonz fucked around with this message at 07:48 on Jan 2, 2015 |
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Jan 2, 2015 07:44
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I haven't bothered to look it up, but I guarantee the title is actually "Tak3n" and I really wish that would stop.
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Jan 2, 2015 07:46
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Where's the one where Maggie Grace has to rescue him? That totally should have been the second one.
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Jan 2, 2015 07:46
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Look Who's Taken Too: Liam Neeson and his wife get back together and have a new child, who is then Taken. Look Who's Taken Now: Finally together as a family unit, the Neeson's buy a couple of pets. The pets are then Taken, maybe by like...and evil, eastern european dog catcher?
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Jan 2, 2015 08:11
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precision posted:Vampire Academy gave us the CHVRCHES cover of "Bela Lugosi's Dead" which is either the best or worst thing about it. That soundtrack was my surprise success of last year. Seriously, it's pretty drat good.
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Jan 2, 2015 10:11
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Taken 3 should just be Liam Neeson getting taken and they threaten to sell him to some rich foreign cougars and for some reason he is against this so his wife and daughter have to save him. Girl power
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Jan 2, 2015 10:19
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 13:03 |
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You people are out of your goddamn loving minds if you think 50 shades is gonna flop. The trailer was premiered through like Beyoncé's Facebook or some poo poo. It's gonna rake in tons of cash.
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Jan 2, 2015 10:19
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