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Breath Ray posted:Just to clarify - I'm not trying to fix anything. (Im not even sure where you got that from - did you have the wrong tab open?) Asking people to share their experienxes of having a loved one with an eating disorder is not white knighting. Right now I'm happy to be my usual swoon-worthy self, and perhaps learn a good recipe for vegetarian lasagne. Where did I get what from? The fact you're trying to fix her, which is the entire point of the thread? Or the fact you said, in the quote in my post, that maybe exercise would help her because of control, leading me to link to that wikipedia article?
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 19:35 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 00:09 |
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Please check rap sheets before getting too up in arms about any posting, thank you!
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 19:37 |
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People, people... I said I don't want to rush in but equally feel it's never too early to prepare. If she needs to gain weight I will support her. And the age gap is there too, which makes me think you are reading something else entirely. e. I'm on my photo so can't check rap sheets, sorry
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 19:40 |
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Breath Ray posted:People, people... I said I don't want to rush in but equally feel it's never too early to prepare. If she needs to gain weight I will support her. And the age gap is there too, which makes me think you are reading something else entirely. "Half my age plus seven" without telling us your age doesn't help much. Also doesn't tell us if you're in your twenties, fifties, teens, or what. It affects whether you're creepy and stupid or inexperienced and stupid. Edit: Oh, rap sheets. I always forget about those. Yeah...
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 19:49 |
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The op confirms the age gap, which you can use with my patented formula to find out our ages, if you really want to.
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 19:56 |
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If she's really 13 that makes you a 3 year old according to that formula. Which is about the age range we're dealing with.
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 20:31 |
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detectivemonkey posted:Please check rap sheets before getting too up in arms about any posting, thank you!
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 20:43 |
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Breath Ray posted:The op confirms the age gap, which you can use with my patented formula to find out our ages, if you really want to. so you're 30 and she's 22? creeper status confirmed also I want the five minutes of my life back that i spent solving that algebra problem
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 20:46 |
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Is that creepy? I think of myself as quite young at heart, although I am in a branch of Homebase picking out paint on a Friday night...!
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 20:53 |
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OP, you are so far apart in age that you just need to find yourself a nice 17 year old (depending on the state's age limitations) to teach about life and have sex with. Bonus points if she's a "fixer" like your current girlfriend.
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 20:54 |
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I knew your name was familiar. Your the dude with enormous ears, and can't find headphones to fit, right? Has she commented on them?
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 20:57 |
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rio posted:OP, you are so far apart in age that you just need to find yourself a nice 17 year old (depending on the state's age limitations) to teach about life and have sex with. Bonus points if she's a "fixer" like your current girlfriend. In this country, it's 16. But I disagree about the age thing. The formula never lies.
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 21:16 |
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You seem to be regarding her like a used car you got a great deal on but needs some work. You haven't even broached the subject with her, you have no idea what she thinks about it all and yet you're planning on fixing her up. Maybe she doesn't feel there's anything wrong with her. She's certainly not at "loved one" status yet, you pretty much just met. Dollars to doughnuts she bails as soon as she realizes you see her as a project girl.
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 21:33 |
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Oh I've got a feeling I'll be cracking ice cold brewskis off her collarbone for many months to come. Although thinking about it, last year my relationships were with girls of 25, 24 and finally 23.
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# ? Jan 2, 2015 22:07 |
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Dangit Ronpaul posted:so you're 30 and she's 22? creeper status confirmed Eh? When did an 8 year age gap become creepy between two adults?
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 00:52 |
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Breath Ray posted:Is that creepy? I think of myself as quite young at heart, although I am in a branch of Homebase picking out paint on a Friday night...! There is nothing inherently creepy about dating a younger girl (as long as it's not too much younger). However if you're actively altering the way you interact with her because she's younger than you (which you have admitted to) then yes, it is creepy. In that case your relationship is based, in part, on that age difference, rather than just occurring despite it. And that's creepy, and unhealthy for the both of you.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 00:57 |
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I can advise you further once you send over the photos, Craig.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 01:08 |
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cmndstab posted:There is nothing inherently creepy about dating a younger girl (as long as it's not too much younger). It's ok and natural to treat people of different ages in different ways. For instance, if I were going out with a 70 year old woman with an artificial hip, we'd be that much less likely to go ice skating together. It's just one more aspect of my fascinating, magnetic personality - the ability to treat people as individuals and recognise and celebrate the things that make them special.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 01:22 |
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Get her drinking chocolate milk OP. Make it yourself from whole milk. Condition her to see it as a reward. Once you chilk you can't stop
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 01:26 |
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Breath Ray posted:It's ok and natural to treat people of different ages in different ways. For instance, if I were going out with a 70 year old woman with an artificial hip, we'd be that much less likely to go ice skating together. It's just one more aspect of my fascinating, magnetic personality - the ability to treat people as individuals and recognise and celebrate the things that make them special. Do we need to quote the rapey "jokes" here? gently caress
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 02:59 |
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Honestly? They might seem a bit out of place in an e/n thread. OTOH who am I to tell you what to post? Let's hear them.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 11:35 |
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Dangit Ronpaul posted:so you're 30 and she's 22? creeper status confirmed Don't blame breath ray for the fact you needed 5 mins to count seven up from 15, its not his fault your mom drank so much
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 11:41 |
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Bape Culture posted:I can advise you further once you send over the photos, Craig. Haha! You might be able to see her on secret p*m African AIDS cum posted:Get her drinking chocolate milk OP. Make it yourself from whole milk. Condition her to see it as a reward. Once you chilk you can't stop That's a no go - she only drinks real milk with fat free acai and sawdust granola Breath Ray fucked around with this message at 13:04 on Jan 3, 2015 |
# ? Jan 3, 2015 13:01 |
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Dangit Ronpaul posted:so you're 30 and she's 22? creeper status confirmed He should just wait it out till she gets fat at 25 when her real metabolism kicks in.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 13:54 |
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I actually think the concept of a real metabolism is flawed, discredited and likely to be misused in self-defence by those with bodies society deems repugnant.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 15:58 |
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Breath Ray posted:in toto ... small sensitive pink nipples Awww yeah. She needs to break up with you.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 16:29 |
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dude you're, like, super creepy.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 16:51 |
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Oh everything's creepy with you. Going out with a 22yo is creepy. Helping her gain weight is creepy. Describing her body is creepy. Well excuse me, if I'm creepy.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 18:21 |
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Could you post a pic? With the face blacked out of course.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 18:28 |
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Breath Ray posted:Oh everything's creepy with you. Going out with a 22yo is creepy. Helping her gain weight is creepy. Describing her body is creepy. Well excuse me, if I'm creepy. None of them are banging and if they are its with a fat chick, and if shes not fat shes old So they mad
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 18:37 |
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a cop posted:Could you post a pic? With the face blacked out of course. Careful, folk'll start calling you racist for that also, while i trust you implicitly, I wouldn't want someone to reverse GIS and warn her that I was, ummm, TRYING TO SAVE HER FREAKING LIFE!! After all, one horrifying aspect of anorexia is the way it 'fights' to defend itself against treatment.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 18:54 |
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Breath Ray posted:Oh everything's creepy with you. Going out with a 22yo is creepy. Helping her gain weight is creepy. Describing her body is creepy. Well excuse me, if I'm creepy. It's not the facts, it's the way you approach things and the way present yourself to us. You come across as having a massive saviour complex and a need to be a knight in shining armour to a much younger chick you seem to barely know. You don't want to help her because you care for her, you want to gain her trust so you can help someone you don't really know. It's a fine line but the latter is sorta creepy. It's GOOD to help people you don't know, but not by insinuating yourself into their lives with the express purpose of making them trust you so they'll listen to your advice. That's just ewww You don't mention her friends or her family, if you're concerned about her well being then they probably are too; if you don't know her well enough to know anyone else in her life who cares about her, it's sorta weird that you've taken it upon yourself to save her from herself single handedly. Also the way you post is really weird, like you read a book on basic human interaction but still don't really have the knack detectivemonkey posted:Please check rap sheets before getting too up in arms about any posting, thank you! Wow, just how big ARE this guys ears?
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 19:05 |
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Breath Ray posted:This thread is really for anyone who can pass on their own tips and special techniques for helping a loved one reach a positive turning point in their eating disorder. Breath Ray posted:Ha, thought this might come up. Shes 13 and im an unspecified, but adult, age. lol this is fake.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 19:34 |
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Well that line was just me being facetious, as the next sentence spelled out. It was good to read that op again though, nothing there to get upset about I'd have thought.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 19:40 |
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Breath Ray posted:Careful, folk'll start calling you racist for that also, while i trust you implicitly, I wouldn't want someone to reverse GIS and warn her that I was, ummm, TRYING TO SAVE HER FREAKING LIFE!! After all, one horrifying aspect of anorexia is the way it 'fights' to defend itself against treatment. That last sentence is the most repugnant you've said so far, and quite possibly closest to the truth. A key element of your relationship dynamic will be whenever you encounter behavior or choice of hers you don't particularly like, or wouldn't have chosen yourself, you pathologize it as a symptom of her disease. Further evidence that she must be rescued from her own faulty judgment, which only you can save her from. You are paternalistic bordering on oppressive.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 20:10 |
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Thread would have been way more interesting if the title was "starving a girl", in the current form it's super lame.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 20:11 |
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close to toast posted:That last sentence is the most repugnant you've said so far, and quite possibly closest to the truth. A key element of your relationship dynamic will be whenever you encounter behavior or choice of hers you don't particularly like, or wouldn't have chosen yourself, you pathologize it as a symptom of her disease. Further evidence that she must be rescued from her own faulty judgment, which only you can save her from. If that sentence is the worst so far, there's cause for optimism - it comes from a page on the UK's National Centre for Eating Disorders: "The first phase of treatment will involve getting to know your loved one so that they can hopefully build up trust in the therapist. This will take time because the Anorexia “fights” back when it is attacked and tells the sufferer not to trust anyone."
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 21:13 |
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Doesn't matter. It's the thought that counts. How will you determine when something is "her disease" (diagnosed only by you, her brand new bf who only just became her fb friend) or when it's just her being her? The problem is that even if she is sick or in need of help, it's not up to you to solve it. Or any potential partner for that matter. A partner's role is to provide love, support, and stability. Not to be assessing which of her thoughts and feelings are valid and which are her anthropomorphized disease fighting back. That's a really unhealthy relationship dynamic you're describing, and if she is in as precarious a position as you say she is, may even be harmful for her. You speak about her as if she's some special, delicate treasure that you've found. Whether or not you realize it, that is incredibly objectifying.
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 21:45 |
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I think you've got the wrong end of the stick here. I'm not stitching my superhero costume emblazoned with a capital B just yet. If it turns out she's just heartrendingly thin or hyperglycaemic then no, I probably won't waterboard her with my world-famous bolognese sauce and hope she swallows some. But if she does have an ED, I'll do what I can to get my skinny valentine to accept professional help. Perhaps Svidrigailov put it best: 'I'm waiting and hoping - that's all!'
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 22:48 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 00:09 |
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gently caress dude, you post like a weird robot that doesn't quite pass the turing test. Just talk like a loving person gently caress!
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# ? Jan 3, 2015 23:30 |