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Talk with wife about ffm three some to spice up marriage, ends up having mmf three some that eventually turns into masturbating while another man bangs my wife
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Jan 12, 2015 22:10
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 09:08 |
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"God damnit Hannah, why didn't you fill up the Subaru like I asked you? Your mother is going to kill me!"
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Jan 12, 2015 22:15
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Gaunab posted:Talk with wife about ffm three some to spice up marriage, ends up having mmf three some that eventually turns into masturbating while another man bangs my wife wife had been cheating w/ other guy for a while anyway enjoys jerking off more anyhow
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Jan 12, 2015 22:17
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*Can only climax during sex with wife by fantasizing about an "oriental"*
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Jan 12, 2015 22:18
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"Okay? Okay. They're gone! Hooooouse to myself" *watches Food Network for three hours before passing out in la-z-boy*
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Jan 12, 2015 22:20
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*attempts to make funny youtube videos in hopes of generating enough views to quit job and fails*
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Jan 12, 2015 22:28
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*literally has never been madder at anything in his life than he is right now at the refs in son's flag football game*
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Jan 12, 2015 22:28
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*<INSERT SHAMEFUL UNIMAGINABLE SECRET HERE THAT WILL CAUSE ALL MY KIDS TO RESENT ME. NOT SO MUCH THAT THEY DONT VISIT OR ANYTHING BUT THEY TOLERATE ME BUT KEEP ME AT ARMS LENGTH LIKE A DANGEROUS STRANGER. MY SON IS LITERALLY WAITING FOR ME TO DIE.>*
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Jan 12, 2015 22:48
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*posts on fyad*
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Jan 12, 2015 22:49
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a hole-y ghost posted:*posts on fyad* that's hosed up and I don't even want to think about my dad pos... no. no... no? no.
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Jan 12, 2015 22:54
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phil dunphy saying tane
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Jan 12, 2015 23:35
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*buys $2700 Custom Shop Stratocaster* yeah me and the boys got a gig coming up at the chamber of commerce. Working on our "Jessie's Girl" and "Pride And Joy" tonight. Honey can you save me a plate of dinner? Be home around 10.
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Jan 12, 2015 23:39
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*Can only cook on the Barbeque* "Could you fix up a salad?"
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Jan 12, 2015 23:50
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*slowly gains wealth and stability by earning steady income over years and years of hard work at a middle class job. *gets cancer a few years before retirement and has to file for bankruptcy at 63 *dies destitute at 65 after spending last years struggling to hold on to any possessions he has, leaving nothing to his wife and children
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Jan 12, 2015 23:54
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DAD: Hey, pull my finger. MOM: I'm not pulling your finger at the dinner table. DAD: Well, could you pull something else then? *children begin vomiting. the baby dies of dehydration, because it vomited too much*
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Jan 12, 2015 23:58
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*divorced, fills house with skulls and tikis and other kitschy poo poo*
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Jan 13, 2015 00:30
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*Is National Lampoon's Clark Griswold.
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Jan 13, 2015 00:48
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*divorces, marries a less attractive woman who likes it up the butt*
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Jan 13, 2015 01:11
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*Complains about kids leaving laptop on when watching TV in other room. Keeps outdoor Christmas lights lit 12 hours a night for month.*
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Jan 13, 2015 01:16
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KbjXPw70LQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8jbSoCbnns
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Jan 13, 2015 01:17
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I AM a middle-aged white suburban dad and way too many of these are frighteningly accurate.
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Jan 13, 2015 01:27
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*Takes up expensive hobby to distract himself from his miserable cookie-cutter existence*
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Jan 13, 2015 01:45
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*watches video of woman getting viciously pounded by four different guys* oh no my daughter is doing porn what did i do wrong *sobs loudly*
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Jan 13, 2015 01:46
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*watches American Beauty repeatedly, and shuts it off just before Spacey gets shot*
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Jan 13, 2015 01:55
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*buys novelty clothing for toddler*
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Jan 13, 2015 02:08
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*sets up windowless mancave filled with tools, motorcycles, model aircraft and other things his wife has less than zero interest in* The one place I truly feel at home..
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Jan 13, 2015 04:52
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makes an itt thread
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Jan 13, 2015 04:54
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*buys a minivan but really wants a truck*
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Jan 13, 2015 04:58
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*wife unexpectedly gets pregnant 18 years after last child was born* *this is more devastating than the first accidental pregnancy*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:00
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*gets divorced from woman that thought she could milk him to the end* *bangs anyone and everyone that shows interest in him*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:00
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*wants a divorce but a hellish marriage is still better than loneliness*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:01
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unlimited shrimp posted:*wants a divorce but a hellish marriage is still better than loneliness* suburban_mom.txt
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Jan 13, 2015 05:05
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*buys pool table for basement*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:05
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*watching state of the union* "honey, come here for a second" "do you think his ears are faked?"
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Jan 13, 2015 05:08
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*swears he's not doing a big christmas again this year* *spends over $1000.00 on gifts*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:10
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mysterious frankie posted:"Well, better get the lawn mowed while its not raining... supposed to rain all this week!" This post did it for me. Moving to tha suburbs; getting old.
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Jan 13, 2015 05:10
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*enjoys panties*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:11
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bitmap posted:This post did it for me. Moving to tha suburbs; getting old. Legalize_it.txt
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Jan 13, 2015 05:12
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*goes to billiard outlet store and buys bar stools and pool accessories to cover the basement now that he has a pool table* *buys one of those neon beer signs which shorts out after a while but keeps it up without repairing it for years*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:13
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 09:08 |
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*stays up after wife has gone to bed to masturbate to internet porn* *hears something that could be the wife making her way downstairs* *frantically puts away cock and changes to a sports webpage*
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Jan 13, 2015 05:23
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