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Dragons Den/Shark Tank is a show where entrepreneurs pitch their (often hilariously terrible) businesses/inventions to a group of investors. The show originally started out in Britain but the Canadian version is the best in my opinion. It provides good middle ground between the dry, quiet British version and the loud, overdramatic US version. It is an amazing show to binge watch and there's a lot of episodes on youtube so I figured, why not make a thread about it. Vet on Shark Tank pitches pet food which he claims prevents all disease and makes pets live 50% longer. Only one investor has the sense to call him out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exGFX3Vu8dE Idiot values his debating website at 5 million dollars. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cojYTma_vd4&t=9m3s Crazy person pitches a spaceship city. The model is very phallic looking and this doesn't go unnoticed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_jyqMG0V5Cg&t=19m5s If you are linking a full episode, please put a timestamp on the relevant part. A video description would be nice too.
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Jan 12, 2015 19:50
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Something about Canadian Dragon's Den seems to bring out the crazies much more than British Dragon's Den. Idiot wants $200,000,000 for a country club where you can drive cars. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsPbdcYtY8Y#t=1500
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Jan 12, 2015 20:07
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I love it when people try to "play the game" and shoot themselves in the foot as a result of it, so here's a dumb Kickstarter'ed thing (thing is the most accurate way to describe this that I can muster) that lost 150k or 250k because they got greedy/indecisive: http://youtu.be/VmnWhyWN6fc?t=30m43s Here is a guy who didn't know when to shut up. It sorta makes me sad that his business is doing pretty well, though: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Un96v87jWcg Some classics: Here is the silver water guy who makes pretty much all the dragons angry as gently caress: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYgGPh28ZnE Bulletball on American Inventors: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOOw2yWMSfk This is more sad than anything. The Sullivan Generator, generate power and poo poo out gold! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLCSmZu8_3M
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Jan 12, 2015 20:10
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"If you sold everything, what do you have now?" "...I have Bulletball". 
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Jan 13, 2015 01:09
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I was gonna come in this thread and post bulletball. Good lord is that pitch a trainwreck
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Jan 13, 2015 01:14
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Celery Face posted:
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Jan 13, 2015 01:44
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Easy one, MLM scheme. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-asYSHPJWQU
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Jan 13, 2015 02:14
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It looks like there's at least a happy ending to BulletBall. The Facebook says it's being used for physical therapy. https://www.facebook.com/INCLUSIONSPORTS/photos/pcb.834675289904044/834675176570722/?type=1&theater
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Jan 13, 2015 04:03
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Eight-Six posted:Easy one, MLM scheme. Man, was that awkward. Here's another MLM with the douchiest douches that ever douched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2mVs12eRcA Take a drink every time they high five, it'll get you plastered.
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Jan 13, 2015 06:19
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JacquelineDempsey posted:Man, was that awkward. Here's another MLM with the douchiest douches that ever douched: Holy gently caress this is just a trainwreck. Content https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAY2xvGzdpA Arsonist Daria has a new favorite as of 08:28 on Jan 13, 2015 |
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Jan 13, 2015 08:12
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Here is a kid who has to read his pitch off cards and gets completely deer-in-headlighted by everything. He also has no website or business or revenue: http://youtu.be/FZGc1dV7tU8?t=8m47s I love how dickishly, brutally honest Kevin is. I'd hate to work with him, but he does do a good job knocking people down multiple pegs. I feel as if Arlene is always calling Kevin out on his assholishness too. Also is it just me or does Dragon's Den have way worse pitches than Shark Tank? Edit: Probably should have waited until I finished the episode because holy poo poo. Four words: Happy Zak's Scrotum Bliss: http://youtu.be/FZGc1dV7tU8?t=24m9s GrandpaPants has a new favorite as of 21:31 on Jan 13, 2015 |
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Jan 13, 2015 21:22
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GrandpaPants posted:Edit: Probably should have waited until I finished the episode because holy poo poo. Four words: Happy Zak's Scrotum Bliss: http://youtu.be/FZGc1dV7tU8?t=24m9s Could only find this one on CBC. A Slovakian immigrant pitches a blanket for poor families that would keep water in the bathtub warm for a longer period of time. When Robert learns that it's too expensive for poor families, he tells her about how when he moved to Canada from Croatia, a scammer tricked his mom into buying a 500 dollar vacuum and it nearly ruined his family. http://www.cbc.ca/dragonsden/pitches/aqua-blanket An umbrella for dogs gets pitched and everyone laughs hysterically at it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdtQogv6_tc&t=30m54s GrandpaPants posted:This one didn't work for me (maybe I have to be Canadian?), so here it is on Youtube: http://youtu.be/1zkTlTp7b34?t=24m2s Celery Face has a new favorite as of 22:05 on Jan 13, 2015 |
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Jan 13, 2015 21:52
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Celery Face posted:Could only find this one on CBC. A Slovakian immigrant pitches a blanket for poor families that would keep water in the bathtub warm for a longer period of time. When Robert learns that it's too expensive for poor families, he tells her about how when he moved to Canada from Croatia, a scammer tricked his mom into buying a 500 dollar vacuum and it nearly ruined his family. This one didn't work for me (maybe I have to be Canadian?), so here it is on Youtube: http://youtu.be/1zkTlTp7b34?t=24m2s
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Jan 13, 2015 22:01
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Len posted:It looks like there's at least a happy ending to BulletBall. The Facebook says it's being used for physical therapy. https://www.facebook.com/INCLUSIONSPORTS/photos/pcb.834675289904044/834675176570722/?type=1&theater  Could you people post more of some of the better/happier ones?
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Jan 13, 2015 22:58
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pigdog posted:This is actually really Here is a guy who made some of the dragons cry: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dxPGR1qQREg Here are two adorable children selling liquid hot chocolate: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EKjzoCe1Ek
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Jan 13, 2015 23:26
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I would love to see a clip of it but I haven't seen this since it aired: You might remember a one-hit-wonder duo from 2000 called Evan and Jaron, whose song was called "Crazy For This Girl": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZkM_nOJ3d4 When American Inventor came out, Evan and Jaron had already been out of the public eye for like, 6 years or so. They popped up on the show, however, shilling the dumbest thing ever - it was basically a bowl with a flat dish on top, except there were holes in the side of the bowl. The idea was that it was some sort of smokeless ashtray type situation, where you'd insert the cigarettes into the holes and the dish would suppress the smoke or some nonsense like that. It was an absolute zero of an invention, but suddenly these two idiots burst into the chorus of their hit: Would you look at her? She looks at me She's got me thinking about her constantly But she don't know how I feel And as she carries on without a doubt I wonder if she's figured out I'm crazy for this bowl The judges loving went WILD for zero goddamned reason and as I recall just threw money at Evan and Jaron. Even if loving Michael Jackson had moonwalked his way into the room these idiot judges would not have been as starstruck as they were, and it was all over two washed up singers singing about a bowl with a plate on top
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Jan 14, 2015 00:23
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Why does Canadian Dragon's Den get the whack jobs while Shark Tank gets weirdos selling crap to Whole Foods and failed kickstarter garbage?
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Jan 14, 2015 09:36
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Luigi Thirty posted:Why does Canadian Dragon's Den get the whack jobs while Shark Tank gets weirdos selling crap to Whole Foods and failed kickstarter garbage? I noticed this too, and I'm guessing it involves the vetting process. I see that Shark Tank actually has like, an audition phase (like American Idol, but presumably not in front of the sharks themselves), but I dunno if Dragon's Den does the same or if it's just a general casting call. And although this might be outside the scope of this thread, I'm also curious what the risk of a "patent pending" is? Like how often are patents rejected, why do they take so long, etc? Like these guys have a dumb product and have dumb numbers, but I'm really curious what is holding up their patent for 3 years. Also the first segment of that episode is for a bread pudding store that I've actually been to (it's good!), which feels really weird. Edit: I really need to finish watching the show before I post because the next segment from that same episode is astoundingly stupid and I hated it the second he started to pitch it. Pet people, ugh. But you can see his spirit breaking whenever someone rejects him. GrandpaPants has a new favorite as of 21:36 on Jan 14, 2015 |
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Jan 14, 2015 21:27
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GrandpaPants posted:I noticed this too, and I'm guessing it involves the vetting process. I see that Shark Tank actually has like, an audition phase (like American Idol, but presumably not in front of the sharks themselves), but I dunno if Dragon's Den does the same or if it's just a general casting call. Speaking of nutjobs, a woman with crazy eyes pitches water bottles with "inspirational" words on them for a million bucks. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ACeMBVid2TY Celery Face has a new favorite as of 21:58 on Jan 14, 2015 |
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Jan 14, 2015 21:55
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This is really weird, one of the dragons got offended at the idea of kelp caviar, saying that it was a scam, despite the fact that the name of it was kelp caviar. I really don't get it: http://youtu.be/kgTzgCX7tNk?t=9m6s
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Jan 14, 2015 22:09
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GrandpaPants posted:This is really weird, one of the dragons got offended at the idea of kelp caviar, saying that it was a scam, despite the fact that the name of it was kelp caviar. I really don't get it: http://youtu.be/kgTzgCX7tNk?t=9m6s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sOYcVa4RVI
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Jan 14, 2015 22:13
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A batshit insane guy who happens to hold the world record for most elections lost pitches an idea to replace Canada's currency with poker chips to "fight inflation." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJT2ntUFj44&t=34m20s Here's another crazy hippy lady with magic water. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zkTlTp7b34&feature=youtu.be&t=1h2m
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Jan 15, 2015 06:46
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Remembered some good ones from the British one: A guy who wants to add incomprehensible flashing lights to street signs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vKFJ_AI3PWA A service that lets you call up off-duty London cab drivers and get directions and information. That's a good idea, but the execution is, uh, lacking. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIPFrZY--30 The world's most energy efficient computer equipment! That you can assemble from off the shelf parts. Part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eP9pgUBJRPY Part 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjf2kon8Qhg
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Jan 15, 2015 07:24
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I really liked this one. No wacky products, just some nice, sincere people getting a really nice offer on their online boutique. I actually felt really happy for them: http://youtu.be/vvPcpVGcEME?t=18m25s
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Jan 15, 2015 07:31
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CidwMIjukDs "This is what wine tastes like?" "No"
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Jan 15, 2015 08:44
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Crazy arrogant dude with tiny little razors https://www.youtube.com/watch?x-yt-ts=1421095549&v=E1JUINEHLHs&x-yt-cl=83781235&feature=player_detailpage#t=791 Actually, this episode had a lot of super bad ideas.
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Jan 15, 2015 09:27
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mmlx-e_u0i8
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Jan 15, 2015 17:08
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GrandpaPants posted:And although this might be outside the scope of this thread, I'm also curious what the risk of a "patent pending" is? Like how often are patents rejected, why do they take so long, etc? Like these guys have a dumb product and have dumb numbers, but I'm really curious what is holding up their patent for 3 years. Generally speaking, if your patent application is rejected, it's not over. You can narrow the scope or edit the language, and often the patent office specifically gives you advice on what to change to make it a valid patent. However, it goes back to the bottom of the pile each time you re-submit it. If you applied for a patent and it went straight through with no issues, it'd take about a year. And almost none of them do. Any patent attorney will basically vet out the really bad ideas, or the initial patent search will find if something's been done so a majority of patent applications are for truly patentable things. They just have to get the language right. And the patent office is very busy, especially since they started allowing software patents and the internet boom happened.
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Jan 15, 2015 21:16
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Guy values a children's chatroom with very 90's looking animal mascots at 1 million. For some reason, I had a lot of trouble getting through this one. There's a hippy with crystals right after this too. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moNj9S5WuS4&t=29m15s Celery Face has a new favorite as of 23:45 on Jan 15, 2015 |
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Jan 15, 2015 23:36
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I hate this thread. Every time someone posts a video with a specific timestamp in it, I have to go back to the beginning and watch the whole thing, everytime. I don't have time for this!!
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Jan 16, 2015 13:40
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Celery Face posted:Guy values a children's chatroom with very 90's looking animal mascots at 1 million. For some reason, I had a lot of trouble getting through this one. There's a hippy with crystals right after this too. That hippie segment was really weird. I was really surprised that Robert was the only one who responded negatively. And that Kevin actually gave money! Who would have thought billionaires and multi millionaires were open to crystal magic?
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Jan 17, 2015 17:37
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Lord Colby Jack posted:Crazy arrogant dude with tiny little razors "Do you know the show Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" "Yeah." "You just ran out of lifelines with me." I closed the window immediately.
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Jan 17, 2015 18:19
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GrandpaPants posted:I really liked this one. No wacky products, just some nice, sincere people getting a really nice offer on their online boutique. I actually felt really happy for them: Study in goon contrasts here; I could barely get through this clip, I hated them so much. They're making 7 million a year, and still need to ask for money to buy a new website?! Poor things.  raocow posted:I hate this thread. Also, this. drat, this show's addictive.
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Jan 18, 2015 16:11
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Something about this guy, whether it's his very manic way of speaking to his dumb valuation to the giant bags under his eyes, makes me think he is on drugs. Also, random D-list celebrities: http://youtu.be/7ppvWhIZ2qo?t=35m41s The very first pitch in this episode is a pretty great success story, too, if that's your thing. I would probably buy that product if I had any decent place to put it.
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Jan 18, 2015 22:25
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The suit guy's whole look and act just screams Columbus, OH douche. Not surprised in the least. And you weren't kidding about the Lumio guy. What a great story.
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Jan 19, 2015 04:07
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This woman comes in with a business that has a name and branding so similar to one of the dragon's businesses that she gets sued. The deal she was offering was pretty terrible as well, just for good measure. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-yLYhhPiEQ
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Jan 19, 2015 14:37
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Eight-Six posted:Easy one, MLM scheme. It takes some major Cojones to pitch a pyramid scheme to dragon'sden/sharktank. That or mental disability. This one's pretty classic, spray on six-pack: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVGmP6QlufY And technology fails are always good https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIPFrZY--30 (seriously how do you not have people working overtime during your pitch?) You know whenever you hear "Please let me finish" in response to a dragon/shark question that its not going anywhere. Zaphod42 has a new favorite as of 19:04 on Jan 19, 2015 |
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Jan 19, 2015 19:00
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Woman getting her PhD who has gotten in over 50 car accidents tries to market cigarette warning labels for cars to the Dragons. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAY2xvGzdpA They're especially brutal. E:FB Lumberjack Bonanza posted:Holy gently caress this is just a trainwreck. Zaphod42 has a new favorite as of 21:03 on Jan 19, 2015 |
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Jan 19, 2015 19:14
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Amazing that we have one page about a show with three distinct versions and we still get repeats. To be fair, "horrifying car distractions + admits to 50 accidents" is top tier.
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Jan 19, 2015 20:59
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Golden Bee posted:Amazing that we have one page about a show with three distinct versions and we still get repeats. To be fair, "horrifying car distractions + admits to 50 accidents" is top tier. Aw poo poo, my bad. I did read most of the page first for that very reason, but then I found the "admits to 50 accidents" video in the sidebar and it was too gold to resist. And he didn't say anything about that video. But yeah I should watch before posting... I love how they're like "Don't drive" and she's just like "uhhhhhh but I had to drive! Anyways---" because her prepared speech didn't account for people being like "50 accidents? The gently caress?" drat though, the Dragons are especially brutal in that one. They don't even wait for her to answer, they just talk over her. Then again, she's crazytown. "I'm starting to question the whole Saskatchewan education system" 
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Jan 19, 2015 21:01
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