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Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Mr.Pibbleton posted:

One of Bruce Lee's actual fights got him to emphasize cardio training and endurance because the guy he was fighting ran away like a bitch and Bruce had to spend an extra five minutes running him down to beat his rear end instead of settling things in under a minute like he preferred.

Fun fact: Bruce Lee once hit Jackie Chan in the face during enter the dragon, and Bruce Lee got really concerned that he hurt him, then Jackie Chan cried like a bitch... because he wanted an excuse to spend more time hanging around Bruce.

Well, that settles it. Bruce Lee is clearly the better fighter. You can all stop blowing Mike Tyson.

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Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

hey look,
a post
also bruce lee would win

its just easier to make jokes about mike tyson winning

Sweaty IT Nerd
Jul 13, 2007

I'll wait for him to tell me I can stop, but thanks.

cams
Mar 28, 2003


tag team of anderson silva and bruce lee vs floyd money mayweather and iron mike tyson

i like this thread idea of just fantasy booking fights

the bitcoin of weed
Nov 1, 2014


dang I was gonna post this

whole thread has already been settled by ip man 2. bruce lee wins because he's fast as gently caress

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec
Who would win: Jackie Chan vs Warmachine?

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

itsgotmetoo posted:

bruce lee with a sling and mike tyson with a 100 pound weight strapped to his back and i'll give bruce a shot

Old style slings are actually really lethal in skilled hands, 50-500 grams of lead to the face is pretty fatal.

Sweaty IT Nerd
Jul 13, 2007

Jackie Chan wins at life but War Machine can wrestle so he probably wins the fight.

Mrs. Dash
Apr 11, 2009
u cant teach size

the bitcoin of weed
Nov 1, 2014

for real in the movie where bruce lee fights chuck norris he kicks chuck in the face like 5 times within a second that poo poo is crazy I don't care how little he is

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Who would win: Jackie Chan vs Warmachine?

Currently Warmachine as Jackie Chan turn 60 last year, but if the fight took place in a home depot, Jackie has a really good shot.

Torka
Jan 5, 2008

jackie chan's always seemed like more of an acrobat/gymnast than a fighter to me

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

hey look,
a post
what about rocky vs tommy gunn?

itsgotmetoo
Oct 5, 2006

by zen death robot

Mr.Pibbleton posted:

Old style slings are actually really lethal in skilled hands, 50-500 grams of lead to the face is pretty fatal.

okay bruce lee has to tie one arm behind his back

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Fullhouse posted:

dang I was gonna post this

whole thread has already been settled by ip man 2. bruce lee wins because he's fast as gently caress

I liked this movie. But I don't know, man. Tyson was way faster and more aggressive than rando dude v karate man.

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

itsgotmetoo posted:

okay bruce lee has to tie one arm behind his back

Well that wouldn't prevent him from outpacing Tyson with his 100 pound weight and it should be possible, if tricky, to load a sling one handed so Bruce Lee still has a clear advantage.

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec
I like to think Bruce and Mike would settle whatever difference they had with their words like mature adults.

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Fullhouse posted:

for real in the movie where bruce lee fights chuck norris he kicks chuck in the face like 5 times within a second that poo poo is crazy I don't care how little he is

Another thing that happened in movies is that Keanu Reeves punched god in the face. Don't be childish man human beings have limits.

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

If Tyson could close the distance and get within his strike range it'd be brutal https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXHJempvayI Bruce Lee is too maneuverable and experienced to let that happen though.

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Hector Beerlioz posted:

I like to think Bruce and Mike would settle whatever difference they had with their words like mature adults.

I mean obviously that would be ideal. I was just saying that hypothetically if they had to fight each other professionally.

sled or die
Jun 15, 2006
I wear a Roche Vouceau
kung fu is bullshit. iron mike would land one uppercut and bruce lee would be a quadriplegic.

Even if you gave bruce lee a knife, I'd still bet on tyson.

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Mr.Pibbleton posted:

If Tyson could close the distance and get within his strike range it'd be brutal https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXHJempvayI Bruce Lee is too maneuverable and experienced to let that happen though.

Surely thousandTime World Champion boxer Mike Tyson never met another quick, experienced fighter.

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec

Cold and Ugly posted:

I mean obviously that would be ideal. I was just saying that hypothetically if they had to fight each other professionally.

Mine was a hypothetical too because Tyson has a lot of trouble using his words in everyday situations let alone conflict resolution.

the bitcoin of weed
Nov 1, 2014

Cold and Ugly posted:

Another thing that happened in movies is that Keanu Reeves punched god in the face. Don't be childish man human beings have limits.

keanu reeves is a bullshit computer enhanced kung fu man while bruce lee did all his own moves and slowed some of them down so the lovely 1970's cameras could actually see what the hell he was doing. he real fast

Doghouse
Oct 22, 2004

I was playing Harvest Moon 64 with this kid who lived on my street and my cows were not doing well and I got so raged up and frustrated that my eyes welled up with tears and my friend was like are you crying dude. Are you crying because of the cows. I didn't understand the feeding mechanic.
Anyone saying Tyson would win either has not seen Bruce Lee in action or... something.

itsgotmetoo
Oct 5, 2006

by zen death robot
bruce lee also wrote a book so he's probably smart enough to not ever agree to get into a fight with tyson

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

Cold and Ugly posted:

Surely thousandTime World Champion boxer Mike Tyson never met another quick, experienced fighter.

While I do believe Bruce Lee would most likely win, I don't think it'd be as quick and easy as people are making it out to be, both men were incredibly dangerous in their prime.

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Mine was a hypothetical too because Tyson has a lot of trouble using his words in everyday situations let alone conflict resolution.

His sense of comedic timing is surprisingly good though, I've seen him doing roasts and watched his cartoon.

Torka
Jan 5, 2008

this thread made me realize I've never been punched really hard in the face, I wonder what that feels like

The Fuzzy Hulk
Nov 22, 2007

ASK ME ABOUT CROSSING THE STREAMS


Tyson would DESTROY Bruce Lee.

ZombieParts
Jul 18, 2009

ASK ME ABOUT VISITING PROSTITUTES IN CHINA AND FEELING NO SHAME. MY FRIEND IS SERIOUSLY THE (PATHETIC) YODA OF PAYING WOMEN TO TOUCH HIS (AND MY) DICK. THEY WOULDN'T DO IT OTHERWISE.
I don't think Lee in his Prime could beat Tyson TYOOL 2015, even. He was just an actor, yo

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Mine was a hypothetical too because Tyson has a lot of trouble using his words in everyday situations let alone conflict resolution.

LOL. Getting punched in the face hurts. Not just in the immediate sense, but it rattles your brain around, probably enough to make you mistake the concepts of rape and love.

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Fullhouse posted:

keanu reeves is a bullshit computer enhanced kung fu man while bruce lee did all his own moves and slowed some of them down so the lovely 1970's cameras could actually see what the hell he was doing. he real fast

Mike Tyson was also real fast. Unless you're suggesting that Bruce Lee had special limb muscles that made him able to punch or kick faster than the eye could see, STFU, gaywad. Let's keep this rational.

Torka
Jan 5, 2008

Cold and Ugly posted:

LOL. Getting punched in the face hurts. Not just in the immediate sense, but it rattles your brain around, probably enough to make you mistake the concepts of rape and love.

you're a prison guard right? I think I remember you saying that in D&D

you must get punched quite a lot relative to the average person

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Torka posted:

this thread made me realize I've never been punched really hard in the face, I wonder what that feels like

It loving blows, dog. Don't even try it.

Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

The Fuzzy Hulk posted:

Tyson would DESTROY Bruce Lee.

Racist.

Panzeh
Nov 27, 2006

"..The high ground"
Tyson would just take down Bruce Lee's whole hitpoint bar in one punch.

Sweaty IT Nerd
Jul 13, 2007

Getting punched in the face is a real game changer. Sometimes it tastes like bleeding.

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

"Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face."-Mike Tyson.

Drunk Nerds
Jan 25, 2011

Just close your eyes
Fun Shoe
Lol at all the people saying Mike Tyson was one of the best boxers of all time.
Next to Ali, he was the flashiest, and he had perhaps the fastest hook-uppercut combi of all time. But dude couldn't take a punch for poo poo. Buster loving Douglas knocked him out. I can't recall one actually excellent boxer he ever beat, but I can recall a string of losses once he started fighting skilled opps. The strongest opponent he actually beat was probably Robin Givens.

Bruce Lee vs. Ali. That would be a good debate/

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Cold and Ugly
Jun 1, 2006

Look what that slick shit bought ya
A first class ticket to Lucifer, real name Christopher

Torka posted:

you're a prison guard right? I think I remember you saying that in D&D

you must get punched quite a lot relative to the average person

It's happened once or twice. Never been concussed though. So if you except almost certain alcohol damage i'm probably okay.

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