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LargeHadron
May 19, 2009

They say, "you mean it's just sounds?" thinking that for something to just be a sound is to be useless, whereas I love sounds just as they are, and I have no need for them to be anything more than what they are.
When you get a cut, you're supposed to keep the wound clean so that it doesn't get infected. This process usually involves soap and water at the minimum. Now, why is your rear end in a top hat a different story? Sometimes we poop too many times in one day and bleed a little bit from wiping too much. I *guarantee* literal poop is getting into that wound, and nobody washes their butt with soap, let alone water. Why does the butthole scrape not get infected and kill us?

I couldn't think of a way to phrase this so Google would understand, so I am asking the next best resource.

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dad gay. so what
Feb 18, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
the worms help keep it clean

Flying Fortress
Oct 23, 2008

LargeHadron posted:

nobody washes their butt with soap, let alone water.

ummmm

a bone to pick
Sep 14, 2011

by FactsAreUseless

dad gay. so what posted:

the worms help keep it clean

Listen to this guy he's a loving expert

LargeHadron
May 19, 2009

They say, "you mean it's just sounds?" thinking that for something to just be a sound is to be useless, whereas I love sounds just as they are, and I have no need for them to be anything more than what they are.

I mean right after pooping give me a break

e. Ok, except some Europeans who do use a bidet but my question still stands

Flesh Forge
Jan 31, 2011

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG

LargeHadron posted:

Sometimes we poop too many times in one day and bleed a little bit

"we"

Flying Fortress
Oct 23, 2008

how many times is too many times? Like 7? I'm asking for a friend

CISMALES DID 9-11
Jun 5, 2002

chaotic good STEM major; INTJ
rear end wounds do get infected and can get really bad

My tip would be to get some baby wipes or stop wiping so hard. Or a bidet

Macichne Leainig
Jul 26, 2012

by VG
what the gently caress toilet paper do you use to make your rear end in a top hat bleed

Macichne Leainig
Jul 26, 2012

by VG
i mean goddamn my work has practically sandpaper for toilet paper and never once has it ruptured my anus

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.
Relatedly, can you give yourself a cold by eating your own snot? Asking for a project.

Bulgogi Hoagie
Jun 1, 2012

We
your poop isn't really prime harmful bacteria real estate until it's been outside your body a bit, OP

Rapman the Cook
Aug 24, 2013

by Ralp
You dab some piss on your damaged ring, just like a poison jellyfish sting.

GAYS FOR DAYS
Dec 22, 2005

by exmarx

Rapman the Cook posted:

You dab some piss on your damaged ring, just like a poison jellyfish sting.

Is this a song lyric? It hsould be.

1gnoirents
Jun 28, 2014

hello :)
poop carries a lot of organisms that cause infections. however poop itself doesnt. if your poop has bacteria or viruses that will give you an infection, you already are fighting it OP, since it came from your butt, you idiot. dont rub someone else's poop into your anal fissure

source - biology

whoflungpoop
Sep 9, 2004

With you and the constellations

1gnoirents posted:

dont rub someone else's poop into your anal fissure
:cumpolice:

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



where does lal the poop go :confused:

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

Chumbawumba4ever97
Dec 31, 2000

by Fluffdaddy
Can you get sick from eating faeces, asking for a friend

Whirlwind Jones
Apr 13, 2013

by Lowtax

Uncle at Nintendo posted:

Can you get sick from eating faeces, asking for a friend

Helicobacter Pylori. Look it up.

root of all eval
Dec 28, 2002

I grinded up my rear end in a top hat with the hair trimmer once. I don't really bother trimming down there after that. The hair has reached terminal length and poop can get through it so all is well.

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



BossRighteous posted:

I grinded up my rear end in a top hat with the hair trimmer once. I don't really bother trimming down there after that. The hair has reached terminal length and poop can get through it so all is well.

GrrrlSweatshirt
Jun 2, 2012

LargeHadron posted:

Sometimes we poop too many times in one day and bleed a little bit from wiping too much.

believe it or not op this does not happen to most humans

Chumbawumba4ever97
Dec 31, 2000

by Fluffdaddy

Whirlwind Jones posted:

Helicobacter Pylori. Look it up.

Frederick told me to tell you thank you

script kitty
Jan 2, 2005

GOTTA GO CATTES

1gnoirents posted:

poop carries a lot of organisms that cause infections. however poop itself doesnt. if your poop has bacteria or viruses that will give you an infection, you already are fighting it OP, since it came from your butt, you idiot. dont rub someone else's poop into your anal fissure

source - biology

what about those sick doctors that take the poop from one man and turkey baster it up into the b-hole of another man?

milkingmycow
Mar 28, 2008

by Cyrano4747
Coat your lovers penis in antibiotic ointment.

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

i've never hurt my butthole while wiping. op is wiping too drat hard

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
so you can eat ur own poo poo and dont get sick?

im asking for a friend

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

Protocol7 posted:

i mean goddamn my work has practically sandpaper for toilet paper and never once has it ruptured my anus

It helps if you use more than one tiny square when you just shart blasted the toilet and left several fecal landmarks on your poorly hygiened sphincter hole.

dad gay. so what
Feb 18, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

LargeHadron
May 19, 2009

They say, "you mean it's just sounds?" thinking that for something to just be a sound is to be useless, whereas I love sounds just as they are, and I have no need for them to be anything more than what they are.

I never cared much for his band, but it's sad to see what Dave Grohl has to do to pay the bills these days :(

Linux Pirate
Apr 21, 2012


sometimes the doctors take one persons poop and puts it in another persons colon to cure some kind of butt pipe problem

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005
If this was GBS1.0 this thread would be much, much funnier.

Bulgogi Hoagie
Jun 1, 2012

We

LargeHadron posted:

When you get a cut, you're supposed to keep the wound clean so that it doesn't get infected. This process usually involves soap and water at the minimum. Now, why is your rear end in a top hat a different story? Sometimes we poop too many times in one day and bleed a little bit from wiping too much. I *guarantee* literal poop is getting into that wound, and nobody washes their butt with soap, let alone water. Why does the butthole scrape not get infected and kill us?

I couldn't think of a way to phrase this so Google would understand, so I am asking the next best resource.

also op get help butt bleeds can be cancer

Corn Glizzy
Jun 28, 2007



I gargle my own piss to cure throat cancer

flerp
Feb 25, 2014
if your bleeding for your butt you prob gonna die in like a year

owls or something
Jul 7, 2003

LargeHadron posted:

I *guarantee* literal poop is getting into that wound, and nobody washes their butt with soap, let alone water.

sorry OP, I defiantly wash my rear end with both soap and water

fakeaccount
Jun 22, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

CISMALES DID 9-11 posted:

rear end wounds do get infected and can get really bad

My tip would be to get some baby wipes or stop wiping so hard. Or a bidet

lol at your infected rear end wound

a real rude dude
Jan 23, 2005

it's best to not poo at all

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Crash_N_Burn
Apr 19, 2014


So thats what dave grohl sitting on a toilet looks like

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