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the op eats pieces of poo poo for breakfast

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When I was 12 my dad and I killed the neighbors dog because it would never stop barking and always poo poo in our yard. They never knew what happened.

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im gay

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i love you

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i stole a kids bag once in school and it had his inhaler in it and he had an asthma attack because he got freaked out about his missing bag.

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I really only read the megathreads in GBS

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I don't know how else to say this... but I'm going to end my life soon. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but as soon as I get the courage to do it... I'll be gone.
I'm a really good person, I'm attractive, I'm smart, I'm loving and caring. But I was a dumb idiot and I hosed it all up with the one girl I thought I'd never lose. I just thought that maybe you'd all like to hear my story before I go. Maybe she'll see this or hear my story too.
It was roughly 2 years ago. I had been really figuring my stuff out you know, going to school, working all that stuff. Then I met her, the new girl at work. She was so amazing and after weeks I finally mustered up the courage to talk to her and man was it the right thing to do. We talked for hours in the work parking lot the first night I met her. She was into me and I was into her. After that we started to go out on dates, spend time together, really get to know one another. Everything was absolutely amazing. For about 6 months.
But then... my brother died. And like that my personality made a 180. I didn't grieve... instead I walled myself up. Even from her, even though I loved her and she knew it I just couldn't bring myself to feel anything. I absorbed myself into video games, TV Shows, Movies. After a while she didn't know how to take it anymore, she'd cry and cry telling me she wanted the old me back. I was too numb and stubborn to listen... I had spent so long being numb that it was impossible for me to feel again. I cut ties with everyone in my life friends and family. Lucky for her we were living together where she got to see the full extent of my numbness. My sex drive dropped drastically. After a while I noticed she was acting different, becoming numb herself. I saw it as her finally being done with me. After a year of putting up with me I finally decided that it just wasn't working out. I thought she was ending it with me... so I did the worst thing I could have ever done.
I ended it with her and because I was so numb I thought it was for the best. She cried over me, I just numbed myself to it. The next day she texted me telling me she missed me and I just responded with this is for the best. About 2 weeks later I had been feeling ok, doing my usual thing. I called her to tell her about something important and as I sat there listening to her talk back to me it was like my entire body has finally broke the surface of all that numbness. All the pain of losing her and my brothers death rushed at me. I started to cry... she asked if I was ok and I just got off the phone. I cried all night and the next day... I rushed to her. I showed up at her house and told her that I was a fool and I see my mistakes, I cried, I cried harder then any man should ever cry. But she was numb to it all... she had shut me out. I begged for her forgiveness and the chance to be with her again, but she didn't want me. She said all she wanted was time, time to realize if she missed me enough to want me. Time to see if I could change and be the man she needed, but I wasn't ok with that. I know with time she'll move on. How can she see how much I've changed if she doesn't allow me to be there to show her? I realize she is just too afraid to tell me she's done with me.
It's been about a month. Time isn't helping me... everyday just gets harder and darker. I care for her so much that I feel guilty just even imagining myself with someone else. All I can think about is some other guy in her life... a guy that'll never be able to love her the way I do.
I was stupid and foolish I too what I had for granted. Now that I've lost it, I realize how much I need it back. I'm not a religious man, but I spend my nights on my knees in tears begging God for the chance to have her back in my life. I sleep all day so I don't have to face the reality that she is moving on while I am dying inside.
So, tonight I will see her for the last time to get what is left of my things. I will hand her the valentines gifts I got for her months prior to our break up. I will give her the 3 page note that expresses my love and pain the best to my ability and I'll tell her I love her and leave. Then... I'll stare at the razor blade I've been staring at for a week trying to find the courage to cut my wrist so that I can finally sleep and escape this reality. I fear death and the endless nothing that may come after I pass on, but anywhere is better then my own mind. Because I can't sit here and cry any longer wondering if she's crying over me.
I have support from my family and friends, but there's nothing they can say nor is their any amount of time they could spend with me that'll be able to stop the aching in my chest and the pain in my neck and back when I sit down alone.
I am a good guy, loving and caring, I pride myself on how romantic I can be with a woman. I've never done anything wrong in my entire life... I don't do drugs and I didn't drink till I was 20. I've never smoked a cigarette. I'm sort of in shape. There are plenty of people who will miss me when I'm gone, but the reality of it all is that I only want one person to miss me and that's her.
I know 21 is young and there will be many people I will meet in my life, but none will ever be as amazing as her and I'm afraid that the things I do will only remind me of her. She doesn't want me anymore and she'll never believe me when I try and tell her she's the only one I want. If I don't end my life soon, I will just die old thinking of her like I am now.
Thank you for reading this. I am so sorry I couldn't be stronger. I am so sorry I took the love I had right in front of me for granted.

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I tell people that I got a SA account because of some cool threads I found in gbs or whatever. I actually joined because of Lets Play

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i date ugly, damaged women because they're easy to abuse and manipulate. i can't get hard to anything else

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Im a 27 year old virgin who still lives with his parents.

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i cum in my plants pst for details

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A guy without a weapon attempted to mug me two nights ago and I decided to stand my ground and fight. I hit him in the head, he hit me in the chin, shoulder checked me to the ground and kicked me in the loving dome so hard I saw stars. I still have my wallet but I also have an angry red swollen half nike tread on my forehead. I've been lifting weights in my backyard to burn off the shame.

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Lost my virginity to a prostitute in nevada to impress the straight guy I had a big crush on that I wasn't a virgin anymore, despite being an unmarried "christian."

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when I was in 6th grade, I ate a melted snickers bar and told someone it was poop as a joke. He told everybody I was eating poo and nobody believed me when I said it was just a candy bar.

Everybody called me the poo poo Snacker until I moved to a different school.

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When I was a kid the Vietnamese neighbors next door had two dogs. Tiger and Bo. Tiger wasa cute rottweiler and Bo was a German Shepherd.
They rarely feed them and both were always skin and bones. Sometimes I feed leftovers of moldy bread when my family had it. Theyre owners hardly ever took them out of the backyard where they lived for about a decade. To this day I regret not calling some one to help them. I was only a little kid 5-14ish and wasn't really are of organizations meant to help animals. I'm sorry tiger and bo. You shouldn't have lived and died that way.

Demonachizer posted:

when I was in 6th grade, I ate a melted snickers bar and told someone it was poop as a joke. He told everybody I was eating poo and nobody believed me when I said it was just a candy bar.

Everybody called me the poo poo Snacker until I moved to a different school.

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I pretend to be black to win arguments in D&D.

CharlestonJew posted:

edit: ^^^^^^^ hahahahaha

jesus christ this thread literally just started and already some sadbrains gave a loving novella of their life

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When I was around 10 years old I was in the locker room at the boys and girls club and the big thing was to call someone gay if they looked at your dick. There was this one kid who I hated so I figured I would gently caress him over and make him look at my dick by going and standing near him so he had to look at it. He turned and my penis brushed against him and that was it. I was totally ruined and gay for at least two years after that because my penis touched another dude.

Demonachizer posted:

Demonachizer posted:

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I tell people I'm not a virgin but really what happened when I was about to gently caress is that I ended up missing the pussy and couldn't get it in and we just gave up and she just blew me I'm 18

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I liked you better when your text was reversed

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my favorite time to jack off to father/son furry porn is right after i poo poo my adult diaper

Anatharon posted:

he means he can't get hard to anything other than ugly women right?

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I lost my virginity when I was 14 to a 37 year old woman I met in an AOL chatroom.

Looking back, I think she might have been a pedophile.

Demonachizer posted:

Over There posted:

I forget, does SA hate women pedos?

www posted:

women cant be pedos

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I stay with my girl even though I don't want to, because she got pregnant with my kid. Not sure if i'll stay with her forever, she thinks I will.

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I like making fun of ugly people on SA because when people ask me to post my picture after or go searching for my picture I'm actually attractive and it makes them shut up.

Crazyeyes posted:

These threads are always good. Bookmarked for later viewing.

Junpei Hyde posted:

Gonna need some updates from Kane.

Junpei Hyde posted:

Gonna need some updates from Kane.

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I suspect I am a sociopath, but if I am, I an unlike others with my diagnosis. I feel empathy and love toward my wife and children, and an attachment to my parents and siblings. That, from what I understand, is not normal for a sociopath. The attachment I have to my parents and siblings is very limited though, and their deaths have little if any effect on me. It was actually the death of my father that caused me to accept that there was something different about me. To be clear, nothing actually changed with his death. I had felt the same before his death as I did after.

I feel no attachment to friends, pets, public figures, coworkers, etc. Even as a child, I was unaffected by hearing of events such as 9/11 while others my age cried. I was more angered at being forced to deal with their behavior than anything else.

Despite all of this, I wear a constant mask of friendliness and kindness. I do this to maintain the benefits of not being a social pariah and managing to maintain relationships I need. That's the truth though, almost everything I do is for a need or want of mine and not out of any altruistic feelings. I'm not confessing this out of any desire to get it off my chest, but talking about it helps me understand more about myself. I am very curious about what I actually am.

I am completely open to the idea that I am not a sociopath at all, but was numbed by some trauma I am unaware of. Perhaps this is just a normal personality type? I have no idea. I'd like to eventually seek the help of a professional but I don't want to be formally diagnosed.

This would be so much easier to grasp if I didn't love my family. Why are they the exception? Is it because they are mine, so I view them differently than others? Why do I do things for them that don't benefit me?

I confessed to this in the past thread, but wanted to do it again.

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It was me. I'm the one who stole all the cookies in the cookie jar. So many false convictions in so many classrooms on my account. But you know what? It was totally worth it.

Demonachizer posted:

Quickscope420dad posted:

"I think my coworkers suck and celebrities are boring to me. I'm a badass sociopath, gently caress society I am pathologically opposed to it. 9/11? PLEASE, take your crybaby poo poo else where because nothing's getting through my iron heart. Love btw u mom, dad, fluffikins"

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I was a GBS moderator, but now I'm a bit too scared to come and post there, so I avoid it like the plague. I am so nervous about it, that I actually almost clicked it once in Firefox's dropdown, and even that near miss gave the cold shivers.

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i made out with a very ugly girl because beer goggles. wanted to get laid (i thought she looked ok when wasted) so I told her I'd see her tomorrow. she added me on facebook and when i saw her ugly loving face I blocked her immediately. jesus christ