|
Dr. Video Games 0112 posted:Dont like a part of your body? Grab an axe and take go to town. 
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:07
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 18, 2024 12:39 |
|
|
Got a beer you need opened, but no bottle opener? Take a sheet of paper and fold it a bunch of times until it's about 2" x 1", then leveraging with your thumb and knuckles, pry off lid, as the paper and your skin tears over and over again without successfully opening the bottle, scream at nothing in anger. Next try putting the cap on a sharp counter edge and slam down with palm to remove cap that way instead, effectively breaking off a piece of the counter as well as the neck of the bottle. As your hand bleeds profusely, put your trembling lips to the jagged edge of your bottle and drink deeply, shaking. Feel the shame of your need as you stare weirdly at your furnitureless apartment. #lifehacks
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:16
|
|
|
odincode posted:Got a beer you need opened, but no bottle opener? Take a sheet of paper and fold it a bunch of times until it's about 2" x 1", then leveraging with your thumb and knuckles, pry off lid, as the paper and your skin tears over and over again without successfully opening the bottle, scream at nothing in anger. Next try putting the cap on a sharp counter edge and slam down with palm to remove cap that way instead, effectively breaking off a piece of the counter as well as the neck of the bottle. As your hand bleeds profusely, put your trembling lips to the jagged edge of your bottle and drink deeply, shaking. Feel the shame of your need as you stare weirdly at your furnitureless apartment. #lifehacks Nice. I like you.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:33
|
|
|
114 TRICKS YOUR DOCTOR DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW!!!! when u want a donut go to the donut shop and buy a donut MIND = BLOWN!!!!
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:37
|
|
|
pr0k posted:114 TRICKS YOUR DOCTOR DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW!!!! Out of donuts? Take one of your bagels out of its CD case and slather it with frosting.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:39
|
|
|
Are you an inattentive father, husband, or boyfriend? Buy your way out of trouble with expensive gifts!
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:39
|
|
|
Washing your clothes will often make them smell good.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:40
|
|
|
Feeling lightheaded with a strange persistant pain in your chest? Try breathing, you big dumb human being.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:42
|
|
|
I just spend a lot of time lying on the floor
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:43
|
|
|
Got a banana that won't peel? Why peel! The skin is very healthy and helps digestion. Remember to remove the sticker. Thirsty on a long road trip, but no water in sight? Spit in a cup for an hour and enjoy the fruits of your labor. Ask other passengers for assistance and do share. Light bulb won't fit your new lamp? Easy! Simply crimp some aluminium foil onto the end, and screw it in. The aluminium is malleable enough to ensure a snug fit. Running out of expensive ciggarettes too quick? Smoke the filter as well! It contains a lot of trapped nicotine and will deliver a refreshing fix just as good. The tobacco companies do not want you to know about this. Out of condoms and really want to gently caress? Easy! A little melted candle wax will seal your urethra up nicely. When done, simply dip your tip in steamy water and wait for it to dissolve.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 19:58
|
|
|
If you are having trouble pooping, sit on top of the washing machine #LIFEPROTIP
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 21:49
|
|
|
Want a tattoo but don't feel like going to a tattoo parlor/are scared of needles? Get a bunch of scorpions and replace their venom sacs with tattoo ink. Then spray the desired area of your body with scorpion attack pheromone in the shape you want for your tattoo and let the little guys loose!
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 21:51
|
|
|
ElGroucho posted:If you are having trouble pooping, sit on top of the washing machine #LIFEPROTIP A high power shop-vac also does the trick. Apply hose to sphincter, and relax.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 21:57
|
|
|
AMINAL posted:A high power shop-vac also does the trick. Apply hose to sphincter, and relax. Also great for doing poop speedruns (check the speedrun thread for more tips).
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 21:59
|
|
|
Just grab a ladle and scoop that poo poo out of your butt
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 22:13
|
|
|
unlimited shrimp posted:Are you an inattentive father, husband, or boyfriend? Payday loans are an excellent way to fund this.
|
|
#
?
Feb 12, 2015 22:22
|
|
|
Let your child help with home styling to make your home truly your own. You can easily make a stylish personal stucco mural by being impatient with the diaper change for your indigested toddler, and have them shitspray your silhouette across the wall opposite the nursing table. True story.
Karate Bastard fucked around with this message at 10:47 on Feb 13, 2015 |
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:30
|
|
|
cant sleep? drive into the garage and close the garage door and turn on the car and enjoy.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:32
|
|
|
Punch the throat to win every fight.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:33
|
|
|
Makes the same sound as opening a champagne bottle. The exact same sound. popsshhhh plat plat patter aaaaAAAAAA
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:36
|
|
|
Dr. Gitmo Moneyson posted:Feeling lightheaded with a strange persistant pain in your chest? Try breathing, you big dumb human being. pls dont sign your posts
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:45
|
|
|
If you are really bored, try taking street drugs.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:51
|
|
|
Karate Bastard posted:Makes the same sound as opening a champagne bottle. The exact same sound. So does the set of a Peter North film session.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 10:52
|
|
|
Both include the unexpected horror of being shat in the face. Well not the champagne necessarily, but the other two.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 11:28
|
|
|
redshirt posted:Punch the throat to win every fight. This but your own throat
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 14:06
|
|
|
Your welcome. http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3649353 read this on the floor like an animal you piece of poo poo
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 14:08
|
|
|
just starting college/university? follow these handy tips and you'll be batting away chicks and friends with your foam larp sword in no time!!! 1. Keep your door closed at all times 2. Wear your space invaders tshirt at all times. never wash it and punch everyone who even hints at laundry suggestions 3. never go to class, just pick up the notes online and learn them you goddamn nerd 4. don't take part in any social stuff like going to 'bars', just drink imported craft brews alone and lp lovely nes games 5. you can never have enough anime wallscrolls, body pillows and memorablia in your dorm room
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 15:24
|
|
|
Giving up is pretty easy to do Sobriety helps you feel better and lessens your disappointment because the drugs and drink don't really work
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 15:27
|
|
|
I had a roommate in college that taught me this, but if you want people to know you are fun to hang out with, wear like 14 wooden rosaries around your neck of various styles People will definitely want to be your friend then.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 15:38
|
|
|
steal things to avoid paying for them
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 16:50
|
|
|
eric posted:Make a home made bomb only using a tape, a roll of toilet paper, and a stick of dynamite! can someone make a video of this being made? I can't find a proper guide.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 20:21
|
|
|
Afraid to get you partner pregnant, but don't want to use a condom? Get a vasectomy.
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 21:08
|
|
|
Paladinus posted:Afraid to get you partner pregnant, but don't want to use a condom? Whew my bf was wondering
|
|
#
?
Feb 13, 2015 22:27
|
|
|
Lonely but cant afford a pet? Try this one weird trick that pet owners hate. The local park has lots of dogs running around. Bring a bag of treaties and entice one into your car. BAM new dog
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 11:02
|
|
|
AMINAL posted:Got a banana that won't peel? Why peel! The skin is very healthy and helps digestion. Remember to remove the sticker.
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 11:17
|
|
|
The last life hack thread that posted the minus restaurant tip genuinely made me lol
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 11:23
|
|
|
AMINAL posted:Got a banana that won't peel? Why peel! The skin is very healthy and helps digestion.
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 11:54
|
|
|
The easiest way to hack life is to run command line (terminal on Mac). Type life /? and press Enter. Then just pick a command and input your hack in the following pattern life hack [command 1] [-sufffix 1] [command 2] [-sufffix 2] When you're done, press Enter. Note: don't try to input more than two commands at once if your computer's video card is less than 1 GB.
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 12:09
|
|
|
come from a rich people vagina. come in rich peoples vaginas.
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 12:16
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 18, 2024 12:39 |
|
|
spud posted:Also my penny smells of rear end now. rear end pennies are the best life hack. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DO1Q7F23DxM
|
|
#
?
Feb 14, 2015 12:16
|
|