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Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

I'm thinking really, really bad.

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CISMALES DID 9-11
Jun 5, 2002

chaotic good STEM major; INTJ
somewhere between terrible and bad but with enough chris pratt fan service that internet nerds will call it some sort of underrated gem of a film while clamoring for more comic book movies

Tumblr of scotch
Mar 13, 2006

Please, don't be my neighbor.
bad, but not as bad as skyline

.lnk to the past
May 3, 2005

psoting while drunk
you forgot the word rear end in your title, it's ok lil' newbie

it will be very bad rear end

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012
it will not be good, but i will watch it anyway

CISMALES DID 9-11
Jun 5, 2002

chaotic good STEM major; INTJ
SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABOUT THE FILM BUT CHRIS PRATT HIGH FIVED A DINOSAUR.... IT WAS JUST FUN MAN, JUST PURE FUN.... AND REALLY ISNT THAT WHAT MOVIES ARE FOR ?

Angela Lansburial
Feb 9, 2005
Nothing to see here.
the dinosaurs don't even have feathers

thathonkey
Jul 17, 2012
Trailer was really bad so im guessing yeah

CISMALES DID 9-11
Jun 5, 2002

chaotic good STEM major; INTJ
WERE THERE DINOSAURS? YES

WAS THERE STARLORD? YES

DINOSAURS AND STAR LORD ?????? WHAT ELSE COULD YOU WANT

EngineerSean
Feb 9, 2004

by zen death robot
I'm probably going to enjoy it and I don't even know who Chris Pratt is.

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

CISMALES DID 9-11 posted:

SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABOUT THE FILM BUT CHRIS PRATT HIGH FIVED A DINOSAUR.... IT WAS JUST FUN MAN, JUST PURE FUN.... AND REALLY ISNT THAT WHAT MOVIES ARE FOR ?

ugh

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

EngineerSean posted:

I'm probably going to enjoy it and I don't even know who Chris Pratt is.

Christopher Michael "Chris" Pratt is an American actor. His best-known roles include Bright Abbott in Everwood, Andy Dwyer in Parks and Recreation, and Peter Quill/Star-Lord in Guardians of the Galaxy

he's bad goons just wanna blow him

bon ape tit
Aug 7, 2011
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ah2xFRUaOg

flick my Mr. Bean
Nov 18, 2014

There's very little they could do to ruin Jurassic World for me but yeah, it's probably going to be bad from traditional movie standards.

Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop
Really bad, to sell the absurdity of a dinosaur world you need someone who can play it grave and serious like Sam Neil. Chris Pratt does not possess the tones needed for the job.

flick my Mr. Bean
Nov 18, 2014

Igor Strelkov posted:

Really bad, to sell the absurdity of a dinosaur world you need someone who can play it grave and serious like Sam Neil. Chris Pratt does not possess the tones needed for the job.

Liam Neeson: Dinosaur Island

The Croc
Dec 19, 2004

A-well-a everybody's heard about the bird!

OH YEAH!



It will be terrible the kids in the trailers will no doubt somehow survive being chomped dispite being in peril for the whole 2nd half of the film ect ect.

But Chris Pratt + Raptor pals = sold

Universe Master
Jun 20, 2005

Darn Fine Pie

The final hour is just a bunch of raptors licking Chris Pratt's glistening abs.

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
I wrestled with Chris Pratt in school and I saw his penis in the locker rooms. Guy is huge

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004



ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP

Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop

dog buttz posted:

Liam Neeson: Dinosaur Island

That would maybe work but he'd have to play it like Michael Collins Liam Neeson. If the star doesn't ground us in the reality of the dino world then the whole thing could feel utterly inconsequential and dumbo. Hopefully they'll cast a bunch of good actors in supporting roles so that kids can have a new dinosaur movie to love.

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
I would kill at least 3 goons for a night out with Chris Pratt and his wife, that lady from scary movie

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax

Zzulu posted:

I wrestled with Chris Pratt in school and I saw his penis in the locker rooms. Guy is huge

wrong chris pratt

Moola
Aug 16, 2006

Universe Master posted:

The final hour is just a bunch of raptors licking Chris Pratt's glistening abs.

sold

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
I'm not gay but if he offered a gently caress i might accept just to see that log in action

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
I will maybe rent it in a few years time

burritolingus
Nov 6, 2007

by Ralp
No feathered dinosaurs equals not watching.

MUSCULAR BEAVER
Dec 26, 2014

HENDO! HENDO!
Hold on to your buttz, Dinolord

flick my Mr. Bean
Nov 18, 2014

MUSCULAR BEAVER posted:

Hold on to your buttz, Dinolord

the gently caress did you say

MUSCULAR BEAVER
Dec 26, 2014

HENDO! HENDO!

dog buttz posted:

the gently caress did you say

:captainpop:

Gutcruncher
Apr 16, 2005

Go home and be a family man!
It'll have a good moment here and there but overall will be pretty bad.

reignofevil
Nov 7, 2008
Why the gently caress would you ever try to even open another park god drat.

I am just imagining sitting in on that board meeting; "So as you all recall what was basically our Hurricane Katrina happened only a bunch of dinosaurs escaped and caused massive human death. Also reports indicate Velocoraptors can open doors. Then in a mindless quest for profit we caused what was basically our 9/11 only with a giant t-rex in San-Fransisco a few years later; so that was a few hundred million dollars in investment and damages down the drain... Which brings me to today."

"Ladies and Gentlemen we have had this genetic intellectual property sitting unused on our servers for a decade. Warm up the recombinator; it's time daddy made his mint".

Amarcarts
Feb 21, 2007

This looks a lot like suffering.
It'll be fine as long as you suppress the hype inside your head.

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy
I just watched edge of tomorrow for the 1st time and the stupidest thing wasn't the ending, but the initial contrivance of a pr officer being sent to the front line for reasons???

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy

reignofevil posted:

Why the gently caress would you ever try to even open another park god drat.


dude it's a loving dinosaur park

Dave Grool
Oct 21, 2008



Grimey Drawer
I'll be at home, safe in the satisfaction that I'm above this film OP

Gutcruncher
Apr 16, 2005

Go home and be a family man!

SHOTGUN REGULAR posted:

I just watched edge of tomorrow for the 1st time and the stupidest thing wasn't the ending, but the initial contrivance of a pr officer being sent to the front line for reasons???

It was because he was a piece of poo poo trying to blackmail the wrong guy. Edge of Tomorrow owned.

Blazing Ownager
Jun 2, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
The real fight is which movie will suck worse:

Terminator Genisys vs Jurassic World, place your bets.

CAMP FARTING ROCKS
Jan 14, 2005

Igor Strelkov posted:

Really bad, to sell the absurdity of a dinosaur world you need someone who can play it grave and serious like Sam Neil. Chris Pratt does not possess the tones needed for the job.

to sell the absurdity of a dinosaur world you needed a backward time of simple-premised blockbusters

it was okay in the early nineties for your films entire thesis to be "SCIENCE GOES TOO FAR", especially with respect to the then nascent field of genetic modification

Chris Pratt unironically uses the phrase "depends on what those scientists cooked up in that lab" when asked to assess the severity of a dinosaur situation in the trailer.

Also all the dinosaur sequences look like loving cartoons.

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CAMP FARTING ROCKS
Jan 14, 2005

Blazing Ownager posted:

The real fight is which movie will suck worse:

Terminator Genisys vs Jurassic World, place your bets.

whoever wins we lose!!!

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