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This thread is making me hungry * eats entire block of cheese *
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Mar 23, 2015 13:58
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:02 |
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I pat my cheese pizzas down with paper towels to remove the grease, therefore they are healthy
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Mar 23, 2015 14:01
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I don't understand how I'm gaining weight. It can't be my diet, I eat nothing but Organic french fries made from heritage potatoes cooked in cold pressed artisan sesame oil dipped in mayo made from free range cruelty free eggs!
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Mar 23, 2015 14:03
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I saw on TV that I should snack on nuts rather than potato chips! *doesn't read label, eats 4000 calories of peanuts daily, gains weight, still doesn't read label, gets angry, doesn't think to read label, gets on fat person TV show where nutrition adviser tells me peanuts have lots of calories, is genuinely surprised as if it was some great secret*
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Mar 23, 2015 14:07
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"cereal is healthy" *eats mixing bowl of cornflakes with double cream and 8 spoons of sugar*
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Mar 23, 2015 14:10
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luncheon meat posted:I pat my cheese pizzas down with paper towels to remove the grease, therefore they are healthy all of us here on something awful comedy website like to joke about autism pizza grease man but if pizza was all he ate and he took most of the grease off he may have been removing somewhere between 200-400 calories from each pizza.
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Mar 23, 2015 14:22
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uses the word "yummy" without shame or irony, like a loving 5 year old
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Mar 23, 2015 14:44
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hmm, i need to lose weight *cuts out all protein from diet*
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Mar 23, 2015 14:46
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Fatkraken posted:uses the word "yummy" without shame or irony, like a loving 5 year old Don't forget tummy.
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Mar 23, 2015 14:53
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Carver Crisis posted:it also cures hiccups but uh dont ask me how i know that this is true - I thought I was the only one who figured it out
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Mar 23, 2015 14:54
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Wicker Man posted:Don't forget tummy. Nor cummy.
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Mar 23, 2015 15:31
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*consumes 300% of the recommended daily value of sodium each day* It's okay, I make up for it by drinking lots of water.
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Mar 23, 2015 15:43
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cummy is yummy in my yummy *slurps gallons of cum every day*
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Mar 23, 2015 15:43
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Refers to any healthy (or not) food that tastes good as a "miracle food"
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Mar 23, 2015 16:48
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Sun Chips, they're made using the sun so they must be good for you
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Mar 23, 2015 16:54
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Organic: 2 points Cane sugar: 2 points Honey: 2 points Superfood: 2 points Probiotic: 3 points Cute wording/smiley faces on packaging: 3 points Fair trade: 4 points Antioxidants: 46 billion points add it all up for the product - anything over 4 and you can stuff your face with it and watch the fat melt away.
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Mar 23, 2015 17:13
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My diet consists of superfoods such as
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Mar 23, 2015 17:16
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*shovels pounds of raw kale into chubby face* "wow, kale is so good for your body" *doesnt understand why he's not losing weight*
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Mar 23, 2015 17:19
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*Thinks animal fat is where being fat comes from*
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Mar 23, 2015 18:58
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Fatkraken posted:Vegans tend to be disproportionately poshos, or crusty motherfuckers from super middle class backgrounds. Posh and middle class people tend to score higher on IQ tests because IQ tests measure a shitload of cultural factors and quite a small amount of inherent talent. yeah studies involving IQ as a significant result at such a tiny difference is silly. Like 5 points, I am sure, is within the margin of error. And of course they tend to have a higher education/job security because as Fatkraken said, it tends to be mostly upper middle class people who already have a foot in the door and ~*privilege*~. You don't see a poor kid from the skreets dropping dairy/meat/eggs from their diet. They would starve.
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Mar 23, 2015 19:12
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also vegans are always like, "try out this killer VEGAN treat!" and I am like, yeah thats okay but it just taste like a very average non-vegan treat. I have never had a vegan substitute blow out the original in taste ( maybe besides veganaisse), and cost 4 times as much. Sick a 10 dollar brownie that taste no better or worse than one i could make from a box for 1/10th the cost.
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Mar 23, 2015 19:15
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64 oz for only an extra 25 cents? that's great value!
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Mar 23, 2015 19:18
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knew a metal kid that literally only ate meat/bread/chips and only drunk beer and water. He started getting reddish spots on his body. His dad, a doctor, had no idea what was wrong with him and sent him to get a blood test. He had scurvy.
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Mar 23, 2015 19:22
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naw man I only eat like 1200 calories a day *downs 6 pints of beer every night*
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Mar 23, 2015 19:22
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Give poor people @soylent so they can be healthy and productive. If you're on food stamps, maybe you're unhealthy and need to eat better.
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Mar 23, 2015 19:24
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logical phalluses posted:*shovels pounds of raw kale into chubby face* If you can eat enough veggies to gain weight then holy poo poo lol
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Mar 23, 2015 20:52
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hi guys did you know cleanses do literally anything useful at all?
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Mar 23, 2015 22:07
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ThePeavstenator posted:*Thinks animal fat is where being fat comes from* A woman I work with unironically believes this. Also constantly talks about needing to 'detox' and is currently doing the cabbage soup diet. She's not even fat, just mentally ill and obsessed with food 
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Mar 23, 2015 22:48
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I dont eat gluten since its bad for me seriously this is the dumbest thing and i have a few friends whove fallen for it and trying to tell them its bullshit just makes me an rear end in a top hat
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Mar 23, 2015 23:03
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Son of Rodney posted:I dont eat gluten since its bad for me Ask them to explain to you what gluten is and I bet they won't be able to
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Mar 23, 2015 23:14
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cyberia posted:'detox' Literally has never heard of the pancreas, liver, or kidneys
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Mar 23, 2015 23:15
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*lives in america* *talks about needing to eat more protein*
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Mar 23, 2015 23:48
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ThePeavstenator posted:*Thinks animal fat is where being fat comes from* um if thats not the case why is it called fat?? check and mate
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Mar 24, 2015 00:05
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Coolie Ghost posted:all of us here on something awful comedy website like to joke about autism pizza grease man but if pizza was all he ate and he took most of the grease off he may have been removing somewhere between 200-400 calories from each pizza. 400 calories off 6000 or whatever I
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Mar 24, 2015 03:25
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ThePeavstenator posted:For those of you that don't know Steve Jobs was a fruit-itarian(?) which was a major factor in him getting pancreatic cancer lol no it wasn't
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Mar 24, 2015 03:37
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Cool NIN Shirt posted:lol no it wasn't 
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Mar 24, 2015 03:41
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super. foods.
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Mar 24, 2015 03:56
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Eats nothing but cum
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Mar 24, 2015 03:58
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*pronounces quinoa correctly*
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Mar 24, 2015 04:00
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:02 |
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soy posted:Eats nothing but cum The title of this thread is that we DON'T understand nutrition
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Mar 24, 2015 05:47
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