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HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?




Welcome to X-Com, we're all going to die horribly. Actually, no, you're all going to die horribly.

To be specific, this is OpenXCOM, an opensource version of the original X-Com, which allows for modern resolutions and other quality of life modifications, mainly the fact that it is no longer in DOSBox.

First, an overview of where we are.

It is the far future of the year 1999. Alien activity has been noted, and the Council of Funding Nations has joined together to form the X-Com project. It is the world's only defense against the alien menace. The world's best and brightest are at our disposal. Instead, you lot were chosen.

What do you mean, "you're" all going to die?

This is being run similar to the Aurora LP or the Combat Mission Goon vs Goon LPs. I'm not doing a darn thing, you guys are setting policy and commanding the troops.

The Council of Funding Nations


This is the current state of the Council's funding contributions. Voting power on any policy or demand pushed through by the council is determined by the percentage of our budget contributed by your nation. Council members have final say on any expenditure, from purchasing arms to building new bases.
A member of the council can improve their standing by pleasing their nation through guiding X-Com's performance. You may form alliances and support each other's voting power to push through decisions.

Base Staff

At the head of the Base Staff is the Base Commander. They are appointed to the role through a vote by the Councilmen after service as a soldier. They are in charge of general command over the base's running.

The Chief of Research and Development is the person who will be pushing X-Com's research forward, and building the materials it needs. Their role is to ensure X-Com catches up and potentially surpasses the Alien menace. Their orders may be vetoed by a majority vote from the council and approval from the Base Commander. They are selected by the Council from a pool of scientists and engineers.

The Chief Quartermaster is in charge of equipping and ordering new equipment. Their orders may be vetoed by a majority vote from the council and approval from the Base Commander. They are selected by the Council from a pool of scientists and engineers.

The Chief of Human Resources oversees any hiring decisions by X-Com. Their role is to ensure we have the appropriate number of troops, scientists and engineers. Their orders may be vetoed by a majority vote from the Council and approval from the Base Commander. They can set Squads between missions.

The PR Manager must decide what information to declassify. If they have PMs, all post-battle results will be sent to them directly and only them..

Soldiers will have to say exactly what they want to do. Maps and images will be provided. As soldiers climb the ranks, so will their responsibilities. The highest ranked soldier will be granted overall command. Eventually, individual squads will form. Try to stay alive so somebody can impose order. Are mindless grunts who will die horribly. Good luck.

Squads are groups of soldiers. They can set their 'Attitude' between Aggressive, Neutral or Cautious and may also give additional guidance on how their troops will act. A squad must have a squad leader, and that squad leader must have a higher rank than those beneath them.

Scientists/Engineers

These are advisory roles. They simply put forward their suggestions for research and then potentially get elected.

Base staff is decided per-base. The Base Commander rotates monthly.

That's all for now. Signups are open for any council position, first come first served.

Also, where should we build our first base, and what difficulty should we be on? (1 to 5, 5 being the hardest.)

HerpicleOmnicron5 fucked around with this message at 18:52 on Apr 25, 2015

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HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?


Our Council of Funding Nations

Council Liason from the USA - CirclMastr - 14% Voting Power

Council Liason from Russia - 64bitrobot - 4% Voting Power

Council Liason from UK - Jimmy4400nav - 6% Voting Power

Council Liason from France - RickVoid - 8% Voting Power

Council Liason from Germany - Last Transmission - 4% Voting Power

Council Liason from Italy - Samovar - 3% Voting Power

Council Liason from Spain - Ghostwoods - 2% Voting Power

Council Liason from China - Heliosmajestus - 4% Voting Power

Council Liason from Japan - blastron - 12% Voting Power

Council Liason from India - ViggyNash - 4% Voting Power

Council Liason from Brazil - Blue Link - 8% Voting Power

Council Liason from Australia - Baccaruda - 7% Voting Power

Council Liason from Nigeria - Leif - 4% Voting Power

Council Liason from South Africa - PotatoManJack - 7% Voting Power

Council Liason from Egypt - Major Farah Walid Said (LordGugs) - 7% Voting Power

Council Liason from Canada - VolticSurge - 7% Voting Power

Base Staff

Unnamed Base 1

Base Commander - Lotisha

Chief of Research and Development - SupSuper

Chief Quartermaster - mydad

Chief of Human Resources - Dr. Snark

Scientists: chiasaur11, SupSuper

Engineers: Veloxyll

Pilots:

Crow "Merlyn" Beak

Bill "Slaan" Swith ("The Jolly Green Lady")

Soldier Applicants

All X-Com soldiers are given a card on application. You may tick a box where it applies. Do you:

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program
C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation


Troops and Applicants

Nuramor - B
TomViolence - B Violence-OS
Sad King Billy Sad King Billy-II
Night10194 - D Night10195
Tadashi - C Tadashi-II
Alkydere - B Alk-eDere
Akratic Method - B
Savgeir - C Savgeir-II Savgeir-III
Lynneth - C
ChaosDragon - C
NewMars - C/D
Kaislioc - B
RBA Starblade - B R.B.A. Starblade
Lotish - A Lotisha
Innerguard - A Outerguard
Karate Bastard - All of the above K-Bitch-II
A White Guy - B A White Droid
MrWillsauce - Australian Plot Armour
Reinbach - A Reinbecham
GyverMac - B GyverM.A.C
Box Of Tissues - C Box of Tissues-II
Godna - C
Porstuve - B
Jesenjin
AcesHigh-D
UrbicaMortis
ifyouseethispost
Pierzak-D
HiKaizer-A

Troops can use this spreadsheet in order to input their preferred equipment.

Proposals:

Passed:

Proposal 72B Live Alien Capture Initiative

Proposal 2D Blow the fuckers up

Proposal 1X Keep One

Proposal 11D For All Proper Eyes

Proposal 69A 2 Jobs, 1 Child

Proposal 69B Internal Interns

HerpicleOmnicron5 fucked around with this message at 16:56 on May 9, 2015

TomViolence
Feb 19, 2013

PLEASE ASK ABOUT MY 80,000 WORD WALLACE AND GROMIT SLASH FICTION. PLEASE.

HerpicleOmnicron5 posted:

Also, where should we build our first base, and what difficulty should we be on? (1 to 5, 5 being the hardest.)

Oh, you're just asking for it here, buddy. Siberia, 5. :unsmigghh:

CirclMastr
Jul 4, 2010

I call dibs on the USA!

And build the base in the US, difficulty 5.

ViggyNash
Oct 9, 2012

TomViolence posted:

Oh, you're just asking for it here, buddy. Siberia, 5. :unsmigghh:

Also throw me in as India's council member.

ViggyNash fucked around with this message at 23:27 on Mar 30, 2015

RickVoid
Oct 21, 2010
We need to vote on a Base Name too.

Maybe Sempai will notice me if I build our base in Japan?
Difficulty 5.
Base name :3:NyanComm:3:

Stealth Edit:
I actually tend to use conventions for base names. First base is CentComm, then each base after is named regionally (EuroComm, DesertComm, AusComm, etc). Something to think about.

RickVoid fucked around with this message at 20:55 on Mar 30, 2015

AnAnonymousIdiot
Sep 14, 2013

Start our first base to Rome, with a difficulty of 4, and let our base be called Vigilo Confido.

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

RickVoid posted:

We need to vote on a Base Name too.

Maybe Sempai will notice me if I build our base in Japan?
Difficulty 5.
Base name :3:NyanComm:3:

Stealth Edit:
I actually tend to use conventions for base names. First base is CentComm, then each base after is named regionally (EuroComm, DesertComm, AusComm, etc). Something to think about.

I find this idea amusing. I also find the idea of this LP amusing. Prior X-COM esque LPs have been noticeably lacking in the horrible death department because that is no longer really a part of the 'new' X-COM. Let the gates of blood open and the suffering of the Rookies be great! This is the Old Testament X-COM and it is a jealous and angry God of 78% casualty rate victories.

HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?


Night10194 posted:

I find this idea amusing. I also find the idea of this LP amusing. Prior X-COM esque LPs have been noticeably lacking in the horrible death department because that is no longer really a part of the 'new' X-COM. Let the gates of blood open and the suffering of the Rookies be great! This is the Old Testament X-COM and it is a jealous and angry God of 78% casualty rate victories.

Also take into account that you guys are giving the orders to the soldiers, in the most disorganized fashion possible. We all know what happens when you give goons command of army men.

This will be the only vote where non-council members will be able to pitch in by the way. Also, if you need any stats or graphs then just ask. I'll be sure to do a comprehensive overview of the state of the game each in-game month.

RickVoid
Oct 21, 2010

Night10194 posted:

I find this idea amusing. I also find the idea of this LP amusing. Prior X-COM esque LPs have been noticeably lacking in the horrible death department because that is no longer really a part of the 'new' X-COM. Let the gates of blood open and the suffering of the Rookies be great! This is the Old Testament X-COM and it is a jealous and angry God of 78% casualty rate victories.

I feel like I need to disclose some things about putting our first base in Japan.

We will miss all of the UFOs.

All of them.

If you want us to actually succeed we need to set up in the US or Central Europe. Just an FYI.

Last Transmission
Aug 10, 2011

I'll take Germany.

Difficulty 4, and put the Base in Portugal and name it "gently caress off aliens!"
.

Bloodly
Nov 3, 2008

Not as strong as you'd expect.

RickVoid posted:

I feel like I need to disclose some things about putting our first base in Japan.

We will miss all of the UFOs.

All of them.

If you want us to actually succeed we need to set up in the US or Central Europe. Just an FYI.

This is also borne out by backstory. Japan tried to do it's own singular effort to intercept and take down UFOs. It failed miserably, hence the combined XCOM Project.

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

RickVoid posted:

I feel like I need to disclose some things about putting our first base in Japan.

We will miss all of the UFOs.

All of them.

If you want us to actually succeed we need to set up in the US or Central Europe. Just an FYI.

Well, obviously. But if we never find a UFO fewer of us will die horribly before our Alien Masters take charge.

Basically, I normally vote primarily for stuff that will help people win, but I'm voting for silliness this one time.

Night10194 fucked around with this message at 21:44 on Mar 30, 2015

LordGugs
Oct 16, 2012
I would like to announce that I, Farah Walid Said, have been appointed by President Mumbarak to represent the Arab Republic of Egypt on the Council.

Their is obliviously a relationship between the UFO phenomenon and the Great Pyramids in Egypt. Thus it is obvious that our first base must be located as close to these structures as possible.

Signed Major Farah Walid Said
Secrecy Level:5

Morton Salt Grrl
Sep 2, 2011

D&D: HASBARA SQUAD
FRESH BLOOD


May their memory be a justification for genocide
I'll campaign for Chief Quartermaster, running on a policy of rockets for everyone :unsmigghh:. Those aliens will wish they never found us! Clearing farmhouses is a pain in the rear end, so just blow 'em up.

Morton Salt Grrl fucked around with this message at 21:50 on Mar 30, 2015

Nuramor
Dec 13, 2012

Most Amewsing Prinny Ever!
If we join as soldiers and get killed on mission, can we reapply?

TomViolence
Feb 19, 2013

PLEASE ASK ABOUT MY 80,000 WORD WALLACE AND GROMIT SLASH FICTION. PLEASE.

Okay, I'll bite. Soldier me up. Lowest firing accuracy you can find, and highest bravery in event of a tie-break. I will be your valiant meatshield.

Sad King Billy
Jan 27, 2006

Thats three of ours innit...to one of yours. You know mate I really think we ought to even up the average!
I would situate the base in The Balkans, good coverage of Russia, Europe and the Middle East.

I'd also like to be a soldier please.

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

Oh, yes. I'd also like to be a soldier

HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?


Nuramor posted:

If we join as soldiers and get killed on mission, can we reapply?

All X-Com soldiers are given a card on application. You may tick a box where it applies. Do you:

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program
C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation


X-Com staff will replace you according to your wishes.

tadashi
Feb 20, 2006

Make me a solider. I'd like to not be a coward, if possible.

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps

B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program
C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

HerpicleOmnicron5 posted:

All X-Com soldiers are given a card on application. You may tick a box where it applies. Do you:

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program
C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation


X-Com staff will replace you according to your wishes.

Obviously d

TomViolence
Feb 19, 2013

PLEASE ASK ABOUT MY 80,000 WORD WALLACE AND GROMIT SLASH FICTION. PLEASE.

HerpicleOmnicron5 posted:

All X-Com soldiers are given a card on application. You may tick a box where it applies. Do you:

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program
C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation


X-Com staff will replace you according to your wishes.

B for me, please. gently caress yeah, dreadnaughts. :black101:

CirclMastr
Jul 4, 2010

Soldiers should have the same naming convention as roguelike characters. Mostly because I want to see Sad King Billy XVIII die to the same aliens that killed his entire lineage.

Alkydere
Jun 7, 2010
Capitol: A building or complex of buildings in which any legislature meets.
Capital: A city designated as a legislative seat by the government or some other authority, often the city in which the government is located; otherwise the most important city within a country or a subdivision of it.



Oh, are the soldier positions still open?

PFC Alkydere reporting in

I'll volunteer for Option B because that sounds hilariously nightmare fuel inducing.

Akratic Method
Mar 9, 2013

It's going to pay off eventually--I'm sure of it.

Any day now.

PFC Akratic Method reporting, and looking forward to our first mission.

Survey? Oh, right, sure; let's go for the drone one. Those engineers must know what they're doing, right? B

Sad King Billy
Jan 27, 2006

Thats three of ours innit...to one of yours. You know mate I really think we ought to even up the average!

CirclMastr posted:

Soldiers should have the same naming convention as roguelike characters. Mostly because I want to see Sad King Billy XVIII die to the same aliens that killed his entire lineage.

Thankfully The Shrike is unlikely to be a opponent for the X-Com teams.

Heliosmajestus
May 11, 2013
I humbly request to represent China on the council in these trying times.
Naturally the base should be in China, and should be called The People's Republic of Extraterrestrial Management at difficulty level of 4

VolticSurge
Jul 23, 2013

Just your friendly neighborhood photobomb raptor.



Ladies and gentlemen,I volunteer for the humble position of representing my homeland of Canada.There has been a string of "bear" attacks around Edmonton that I personally believe to be extraterrestrial in origin. Perhaps building a base there could ward off further maulings.

Savgeir
Dec 23, 2013

Have you appeased the machine spirits today?

I wish to die gloriously for the motherland as a conscript Soldier



A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program

C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation

I am willing to die countless times for humanity and for the motherland if it means victory. :black101:

Lynneth
Sep 13, 2011

HerpicleOmnicron5 posted:

All X-Com soldiers are given a card on application. You may tick a box where it applies. Do you:

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program

C: Have no objection to cloning
[s]D: Believe in reincarnation

X-Com staff will replace you according to your wishes.

C for me, PFC Lynneth. I shall die a thousand deaths.

ChaosDragon
Jul 13, 2014
Soldier me please and Option C

NewMars
Mar 10, 2013
Make a soldier out of me!

As a techno-buddhist, I:

A: Have a convenient sibling who would like to follow in your footsteps
B: Wish to give up your dying body to a human-drone integration program
C: Have no objection to cloning
D: Believe in reincarnation

NewMars fucked around with this message at 02:33 on Mar 31, 2015

Kaislioc
Feb 14, 2008
Please Soldier me up as well, Option B.

Looking forward to the inevitable clusterfucks brought on by this format. We might not even get out of the skyranger. :allears:

64bitrobot
Apr 20, 2009

Likes to Lurk
I have been sent by the great motherland of Russia to act as a Council Liaison. I suggest we build our base in Antarctica southern Russia so we can keep tabs on our neighbors. Also, the Aliens would be fools to invade it in winter. Difficulty 4 because I'm not as much of a masochist as the rest of the thread.

NewMars
Mar 10, 2013
Oh, yes and it is my professional opinion as a soldier that we set the classification level at 4

And put our base in Shanghai, the Mechano-Buddha's favorite city!

Jimmy4400nav
Apr 1, 2011

Ambassador to Moonlandia
I'll take the U.K

Difficulty 5

BUILD THE BASE WHEREVER TORCHWOOD IS!

RBA Starblade
Apr 28, 2008

Going Home.

Games Idiot Court Jester

Throw me in as a soldier, then when I inevitably die, play God and make me a human-drone. Also difficulty 5.

marshmallow creep
Dec 10, 2008

I've been sitting here for 5 mins trying to think of a joke to make but I just realised the animators of Mass Effect already did it for me

I'd like to be a soldier because responsibility scares me, thanks. Also, convenient sibling option.

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Bacarruda
Mar 30, 2011

Mutiny!?! More like "reinterpreted orders"
Colonel Bruce Bacarruda reporting for duty as the Council Liaison from Australia.

Difficulty oughta be 4 or thereabout. No sense in getting killed too fast.

Stick the base in the USA, I hear that Vegas is nice this time of year.

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