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Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


I can find my way around a needle, so feel free to ask a question. If I don't know the answer I'll look/make it up. I can do all kinds of sewing and other hand crafts too. Tatting, felting, crocheting antimacassars, macrame, all that poo poo.

Here's some things I wonder about knitting to kick it off:

*When you cable stitch you use three needles and when you knit heels on socks you use 4. What would happen if you just kept adding needles? Maybe a mathematician could help with this one.

*In A Tale of Two Cities Madame Defarge knitted everyone's crimes into her blanket or whatever in secret code. What did that look like? Was it nice? I feel like it probably wasn't.

*When I'm rich I'm going to have Dale Chihuly blow me some swag glass knitting needles. I guess he's like a bajillion years old so I had better get on it.

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StealthArcher
Jan 10, 2010




Can you knit shut the gaping void in your soul brought about by your lazy, no good, lack of any drive to accomplish?

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


StealthArcher posted:

Can you knit shut the gaping void in your soul brought about by your lazy, no good, lack of any drive to accomplish?

yeah they're called scarves

pig slut lisa
Mar 5, 2012

irl is good


What is the most common type of knitting injury?

pig slut lisa
Mar 5, 2012

irl is good


What are the most underrated and overrated concepts/aspects/whatevers in the field of knitting?

pig slut lisa
Mar 5, 2012

irl is good


Are there any pictures on line of a little pig wearing a littler knit cap?

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


pig slut lisa posted:

What is the most common type of knitting injury?

knitters knuckle it's a very painful affliction of the fingers and joints. my knitting circle knits tiny compression tubes for the Knitters Knuckle Knancies, a charity that raises awareness and helps victims of this misunderstood disorder

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


pig slut lisa posted:

What are the most underrated and overrated concepts/aspects/whatevers in the field of knitting?

overrated: bamboo needles because they're for pinkos and hippies

underrated: melamine needles. they're pretty and they don't lose their finish and they'll never biodegrade or warp

Fruity Gordo
Aug 5, 2013

Neurotic, Impotent Rage!
fyi i dont use a third needle when i do cables, i use a bobby pin bc im a genius

also magic loop bc gently caress dpns

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


pig slut lisa posted:

Are there any pictures on line of a little pig wearing a littler knit cap?

no

pig slut lisa
Mar 5, 2012

irl is good


thank you. i do not wonder anything else about knitting anymore. :tipshat:

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


Fruity Gordo posted:

fyi i dont use a third needle when i do cables, i use a bobby pin bc im a genius

also magic loop bc gently caress dpns

as a traditionalist and also a showboater I use three needles because it looks rad as hell. I don't believe in doing a thing unless it's done awesomely

however I applaud your ingenuity

Fruity Gordo
Aug 5, 2013

Neurotic, Impotent Rage!
i wonder what i could knit with seven needles :2bong:

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


*I have a friend who uses toothpicks to knit tiny clothing for little dolls. Why does she do this?

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


Fruity Gordo posted:

i wonder what i could knit with seven needles :2bong:

Holy poo poo I know right :aaaaa:

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


*Latch hook. a Serious Needlecraft?

Pedantra
Jul 9, 2014

by Lowtax

Jimi Changa posted:

yeah they're called scarves

Yobgoblin
Mar 19, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Clapping Larry
Do any of the 90's rappers knit or sew?

defectivemonkey
Jun 5, 2012
I wanted to start knitting again but I am pretty sure I cannot handle 3 needles at once so this is clearly a dead end for me thank you for crushing my dreams op.

Fruity Gordo
Aug 5, 2013

Neurotic, Impotent Rage!
USE A BOBBY PIN MATE

Fruity Gordo
Aug 5, 2013

Neurotic, Impotent Rage!

Yobgoblin posted:

Do any of the 90's rappers knit or sew?

not rappers but judging by their name slipknot are very into crafting

aejix
Sep 18, 2007

It's about finding that next group of core players we can win with in the next 6, 8, 10 years. Let's face it, it's hard for 20-, 21-, 22-year-olds to lead an NHL team. Look at the playoffs.

That quote is from fucking 2018. Fuck you Jim
Pillbug
I wonder if someone can knit me a Vancouver Millionaires throwback toque

McStabby
Jun 26, 2007

LANA!!! CRUUUUUSH!

detectivemonkey posted:

I wanted to start knitting again but I am pretty sure I cannot handle 3 needles at once so this is clearly a dead end for me thank you for crushing my dreams op.

You're only using two needles at a time, just pretend the other doesn't exist. Or use a circular needle if multiple needles are too complex for you.

SniperWoreConverse
Mar 20, 2010



Gun Saliva
looking for info about knitting bone and stitching flesh
please respond very soon, thank you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdaM5Mv-TTo

SniperWoreConverse
Mar 20, 2010



Gun Saliva
I was able to find some information about the "knitbone" plant, but it appears to be some holistic hippy junk, hoping i can get concrete answers that don't consist of "rub a plant leaf on it."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdaM5Mv-TTo

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


detectivemonkey posted:

I wanted to start knitting again but I am pretty sure I cannot handle 3 needles at once so this is clearly a dead end for me thank you for crushing my dreams op.

no problem. I saw a lady on the bus knitting with 5 needles and I unraveled all the scarves I was working on in a fit of impotent rage

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


aejix posted:

I wonder if someone can knit me a Vancouver Millionaires throwback toque

no

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


SniperWoreConverse posted:

looking for info about knitting bone and stitching flesh
please respond very soon, thank you

only info on rending bone and tearing flesh here, sorry

alnilam
Nov 10, 2009

I wonder, if WD40 can knit socks, and if so how hard is it

Luvcow
Jul 1, 2007

One day nearer spring
Is it true that when a man sees a woman knitting there is a flood of hormones released akin to seeing a bikini model?

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


alnilam posted:

I wonder, if WD40 can knit socks, and if so how hard is it

KIND of

here's the deal on socks: heels are hard. real hard. I can't think of anything harder than a heel. theoretically I COULD make a sock, but I would have to stop smoking weed for like two weeks and go into a self-induced cloister until it was finished

so if we're being honest with ourselves, no

Luvcow
Jul 1, 2007

One day nearer spring


Took a selfie of me knitting this morning, does this inspire you OP?

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


Luvcow posted:

Is it true that when a man sees a woman knitting there is a flood of hormones released akin to seeing a bikini model?

no thank god. otherwise our grandmas would not be safe

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


Luvcow posted:



Took a selfie of me knitting this morning, does this inspire you OP?

please see my above thoughts on bamboo knitting needles

McStabby
Jun 26, 2007

LANA!!! CRUUUUUSH!

Luvcow posted:



Took a selfie of me knitting this morning, does this inspire you OP?

This method is as complex as the staple and glue method.

Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


*If every knitter in the world knitted a 4"x4" square how long would it take me to stitch them all together into a giant quilt? what if I had help? how much of the world would it cover? could I make a knitted bridge and walk to Japan? maybe just Hawaii?

Luvcow
Jul 1, 2007

One day nearer spring
I hear that some of the more affluent people on the forums have huge quilting rooms for just this purpose.

Piso Mojado
Aug 6, 2013

what's a good beginners project? any good resources for it?

Piso Mojado
Aug 6, 2013

this is a serious goal of mine wd. just cleared it by the gf and she confirmed that she will only lose a minimal amount of respect for me.

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Lil Cunty
Oct 22, 2007


Piso Mojado posted:

what's a good beginners project? any good resources for it?

start with a scarf. some people say dishcloths because they're smaller, but I think cotton yarn is less rewarding to work with and also it's fun and funny to wear your first scarf, which will be hideous but you'll love it anyway. probably

when I started I bough a 1lb skein of acrylic yarn, 2 metal needles and a pamphlet on knitting (this was...hahaha I can't believe im going to say this, before the Internet). it was about a $10 investment, but now you can just YouTube "casting on", "basic knit stitch" and "casting off" and if you have a ball of yarn and a couple chopsticks you can try it for free before you sink any money into it

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