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RaceBannon
Apr 3, 2010
its okay guys.

its just bread and cheese.


and mayo
and sriracha and butter and heirloom tomatoes

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Fergus Mac Roich
Nov 5, 2008

Soiled Meat
food tip: people often throw away potato skins, but theyre still edible. if you're looking in someones trash and you see a potato skin make sure to eat it.

YoungSexualNorton
Aug 8, 2004
These are good for the children's brains.

Moridin920 posted:

yeah


there's not even more steps other than 'finish in the oven' and 'use ingredients other than sliced white bread and kraft singles'

yeah baby gimme that already over-thick over-firm bread and then crust it up even more by using butter which is wholly inadequate for pan toasting because you either wreck the taste by using a shitload so the bread doesn't turn to granite or gently caress the toasting process by using a bitch-thin layer

i see you sagely opted for the latter route so i'm sure all of your guests enjoyed having their gums bleed with each bite. hey though it's fancy because we stuck it an oven for a while and the milliliter of butter had some garlic sitting in it a few hours ago

Jerry Mumphrey
Mar 11, 2004

by zen death robot

(and can't post for 4 years!)

RaceBannon posted:

heirloom tomatoes

thanks I feel better now

feller
Jul 5, 2006


How many of you people confused by ciabatta and gruyere think olive garden is delicious?

Master Twig
Oct 25, 2007

I want to branch out and I'm going to stick with it.
Bring it upstairs. Then it will be on a different level















... of your house. :rimshot:

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

YoungSexualNorton posted:

yeah baby gimme that already over-thick over-firm bread and then crust it up even more by using butter which is wholly inadequate for pan toasting because you either wreck the taste by using a shitload so the bread doesn't turn to granite or gently caress the toasting process by using a bitch-thin layer

i see you sagely opted for the latter route so i'm sure all of your guests enjoyed having their gums bleed with each bite. hey though it's fancy because we stuck it an oven for a while and the milliliter of butter had some garlic sitting in it a few hours ago

I'm sorry you've only ever eaten stale as gently caress ciabatta? cut it thinner and use some fresher poo poo. It shouldn't be 'firm' at all, it should just be like regular bread in its firmness. The crust is really the only part you have to worry about cutting your mouth on, but just slice the crusts off before serving (they make an excellent snack for the chef anyway).

Pan toasting doesn't wreck anything, just turn the heat down scrub. You're not toasting, you're pan frying the bottom part of the bread.

I put a good layer of butter on there and you can clearly taste it without it being granite. You can even see the herbs we put in the butter nice and toasted onto the bread.

And it's not that hard to infuse butter with poo poo lol come on. Pan, oil, shallots + garlic, strain. Cream the shallots + garlic with some herbs, then take that mix and combine with butter. Use a blender so you end up with nice light whipped butter for easy spreading.

Moridin920 fucked around with this message at 21:44 on May 21, 2015

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

Fergus Mac Roich posted:

Naked Grilled Cheese

1. Cheese
2. Bowl
3. Bread(optional)

melt the cheese and put it in the bowl. if you don't want to melt the cheese yourself go to Taco Bell and get the nacho cheese there. then if you're using bread go ahead and break it up and stir it into the bowl. eat with a spoon.

That's a deconstructed grilled cheese, friend

ROFLburger
Jan 12, 2006
if im making a grilled cheese with heirloom tomatoes, what is the optimal cheese here? cheddar or something else?

ROFLburger
Jan 12, 2006
something i can get at the grocery store please none of this artisanal wine vineyard bullshit cheese

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
gruyere goes really well with tomato imo

otherwise get some pesto, mozarella, and basil (and a little olive oil) and make it a caprese.

Jerry Mumphrey
Mar 11, 2004

by zen death robot

(and can't post for 4 years!)

ROFLburger posted:

if im making a grilled cheese with heirloom tomatoes, what is the optimal cheese here? cheddar or something else?

just get all the cheese you can, the more cheeses the better

king salmon
Oct 30, 2011

by Cowcaster
absolutely do not use cheddar under any circumstances

ROFLburger
Jan 12, 2006

king salmon posted:

absolutely do not use cheddar under any circumstances

ok why

texaholic
Sep 16, 2007

Well it's floodin' down in Texas
All of the telephone lines are down

Nooner posted:

if youre feeling really while you can also substitute the bread for a "tortilla" for an additional "latin" kick!

thats called a quesadilla, my man

Sauer
Sep 13, 2005

Socialize Everything!
Prepare a regular grilled cheese. Tastefully plate it. Sit at the table with it and take a single bite. Then kill yourself.

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003

Cybernetic Crumb
didn't read thread but the answer is to sprinkle parmesan onto it before you grill it. Makes a crust that is better than the core sandwich.

YoungSexualNorton
Aug 8, 2004
These are good for the children's brains.

Moridin920 posted:

I'm sorry you've only ever eaten stale as gently caress ciabatta? cut it thinner and use some fresher poo poo. It shouldn't be 'firm' at all, it should just be like regular bread in its firmness.

Pan toasting doesn't wreck anything, just turn the heat down scrub.

I put a good layer of butter on there and you can clearly taste it without it being granite. You can even see the herbs we put in the butter nice and toasted onto the bread.

this is basically the sorcerer's apprentice of grilled cheese sandwiches. every time you ineptly try to jazz poo poo up you end up needing to make more changes to compensate. cut the bread even thinner, cut off the obsidian sharp ciabatta crust, put it in the oven because all our hosed ratios and insistence on butter keep a regular pan from being sufficient

the part that's missing is where some competent person comes in and takes the spatula away from you and creates an objectively better sandwich in a quarter of the time with fewer and cheaper ingredients

king salmon
Oct 30, 2011

by Cowcaster

melts poorly and you'll get an oily mess, also it doesn't taste good when it's heated

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy
just fry bread in butter, turn it over then put the cheese on the already fried half. then make into a sandwich and fry the uncooked outer bits. done

Necros
Jul 23, 2003

strong opinions about grilled cheese itt

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


french bread, a bit of butter, and a decent quality cheese, grated, the rest is obvious.

Jerry Mumphrey
Mar 11, 2004

by zen death robot

(and can't post for 4 years!)

Necros posted:

strong opinions about grilled cheese itt

if you can't get passionate about a G.C. you might as well just cash in your chips now

the fart question
Mar 21, 2007

College Slice
instead of grilled cheese use a fried egg and put jalapenos on it

Mr. Pumroy
May 20, 2001

Fake James
Aug 18, 2005

Y'all got any more of that plastic?
Buglord
have a mexican repeatedly slam his foot into your nuts for a "latin" kick!

I'm Crap
Aug 15, 2001
cover it with whipped up egg and fry it in butter to make a french toast grilled cheese

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
hit yourself in the head with the skillet until you lose consciousness

Winnie the Shit
Dec 25, 2005

the cat came back

Salt Fish posted:

didn't read thread but the answer is to sprinkle parmesan onto it before you grill it. Makes a crust that is better than the core sandwich.

this sounds p good, I've only tried garlic butter

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

YoungSexualNorton posted:

this is basically the sorcerer's apprentice of grilled cheese sandwiches. every time you ineptly try to jazz poo poo up you end up needing to make more changes to compensate. cut the bread even thinner, cut off the obsidian sharp ciabatta crust, put it in the oven because all our hosed ratios and insistence on butter keep a regular pan from being sufficient

the part that's missing is where some competent person comes in and takes the spatula away from you and creates an objectively better sandwich in a quarter of the time with fewer and cheaper ingredients

yeah or you just cut the bread right the first time. a regular pan would work just fine at the right heat, given that a flat top is basically just a giant pan with a flame under it.

lol if you think there's something wrong with finishing an item in the oven

then at the end cut the crusts off if you're a baby bitch


idk what part of this is so complicated it's not like I'm asking you to make a cheese sauce and screaming about how your roux is hosed

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

if you're using some kind of substantial bread (anything other than like wonderbread type stuff) the grilled cheese always turns out better if it's pressed.

King of Bees
Dec 28, 2012
Gravy Boat 2k
Get some good "French" bread at the store. Slice it. Chop up some prosciutto. Butter two slices on one side each.
Put sharp cheddar slivcces on the non buttered side. Flip the sides togeter but put prosciutto in the middle. Do that before flipping..
Grill one side in a hot frying pan. Flip and grill the other. Get a gooood crust on it. Take off the pan. Grab it on one hand. Hot and ready to eat.
Or you can wad it up and jam it up your butt as hard and fast as possible? Instant gratification.

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!

Jerry Mumphrey posted:

maybe some heirloom tomato?

Look, we all want heirloom tomatoes, but they're just not in season yet.

Infinite Karma
Oct 23, 2004
Good as dead





here you go op

root beer
Nov 13, 2005

Otto von Ruthless posted:

use rendered beef tallow instead of butter

ROFLburger
Jan 12, 2006

Infinite Karma posted:

here you go op



:barf:

RaceBannon
Apr 3, 2010
That makes me feel bad.

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Infinite Karma posted:

here you go op



that's next level alright

Whybird
Aug 2, 2009

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Nap Ghost

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TontoCorazon
Aug 18, 2007


Necros posted:

strong opinions about grilled cheese itt

I will literally cut a man's head off if he even so much as suggest some artisan poo poo in my grilled cheeses.

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