|
I mean, at first glance you think "heh, yeah, Trojan, Trojan horse, I get it!" and on a superficial level it's a very fitting name for a condom brand and it's a great marketing decision. But with even the very slightest critical analysis you find that it is very silly: the Trojan Horse was a large wooden construction built by the ancient Acheans (greeks) who were besieging the city of Troy during a protracted war. The horse was built as a trick to fool the Trojans into accepting it as a kind of "you win, we're leaving, have this horse" thing from the greeks, but in reality it contained a contingent of greek soldiers who, later that night, opened the gates of the city for the awaiting greek army and Troy was sacked. So I mean, on the first level, the Trojan horse was built to successfully deliver its contents, not hinder them! That's entirely the opposite purpose of a condom, which is to hinder the deliverance of the sperm into the female's reproductive system in order to achieve conception of a human baby. So with just the slightest investigation the name falls apart and you think to yourself "wait poo poo why the gently caress would I buy condoms based on the trojan horse, is this some kind of hosed up joke/trick???" That's wheere our second level of analytsis comes in. The Trojan horse WAS a trick, it was a ploy used by the greeks to defeat the Trojans. The trojans are women, the greeks are men, this is shown by the fact that Paris was a bitchy manlet who came from Troy and Helen was a b adass woman from Greece (it's an ironic foil you see). The greek devise the trojan horse to get inside the trojans. So bsically a woman seeing a man using trojan condoms should immediately pack up and get the gently caress out of dodge because that guy is trying to trick her and get inside her and basically means tghat he is raping her no matter what kind of psychosomatic consensual bullshit he conceives to derive an "agreement" from her. So in conclusion "Trojan" is a really bad name for a condom brand for business reasons and also because it is misogynistic and anti-woman. And also anti-men because it paints all men as users of "trojan horses" and thus as greeks and they were a bunch of war hungry dick heads like agamemnon was and achilles and they just raped and hosed and murdered whereas the Trojans were nice peaceful city dwellers.
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:13 |
|
|
# ? Mar 19, 2024 12:13 |
|
i make sure to throw in a box of magnums with my grocery purchase everytime i go to the grocery store and make sure to go to the line with the a female cashier and wink at people as they ring it up. then i throw it away on the way out because i have a micropenis and cry myself to sleep
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:14 |
|
tl dr
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:15 |
|
did you personally write all those words? cause the joke is right in the title, that would've been a C+ thread at least.
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:20 |
|
the trojans held out for years dude they were a manly master race not like those effete greeks the only way trojans (condoms) can be defeated is by trickery (spermjacking)
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:22 |
|
SHISHSKABOB is a pretty ironic name for a poster
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:25 |
|
opening this thread just gave us all trojan viruses on our computer
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:26 |
|
Durex or gtfo
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:27 |
|
That's a lot of words to say "Trojan is a really weird name for a condom. When people think Trojan they think of a big ol' wooden stallion that filled a city with a hot steaming load of guys."
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:29 |
|
It's really only a Trojan if you poke a hole in it with a needle to get your little swimmers inside to ransack her city.
|
# ? May 28, 2015 22:39 |
|
I'm actually p. sure the name actually referred to the city of Troy, whose legendary impenetrable walls resisted the combined might of the Hellenes for over a decade.
|
# ? May 28, 2015 23:40 |
|
penis sock
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:11 |
|
shouldnt it be called achean horse if it was full of greeks
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:16 |
|
I prefer going raw, its a lot more exciting that way
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:16 |
|
because ur dick is hiding in a big horse?
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:26 |
Xaris posted:i make sure to throw in a box of magnums with my grocery purchase everytime i go to the grocery store and make sure to go to the line with the a female cashier and wink at people as they ring it up. then i throw it away on the way out because i have a micropenis and cry myself to sleep https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HilyOLWzrM
|
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:35 |
|
the Trojan Horse was Achaean, dumbass, the condoms are called Trojans because the Trojans successfully defended against the Greeks for so long and had such protective, impenetrable walls
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:37 |
|
TacticalUrbanHomo posted:the Trojan Horse was Achaean, dumbass, the condoms are called Trojans because the Trojans successfully defended against the Greeks for so long and had such protective, impenetrable walls
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:39 |
|
Maginot condoms
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:39 |
|
and yet the aids still got in
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:41 |
|
Harald posted:Maginot condoms I always just go through Belgium. e: I mean the rear end
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:42 |
|
Harald posted:Maginot condoms cause they never get used in action
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:42 |
|
but it's America's #1 Trustest Condom, right?
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:49 |
|
I have to use the special upward-curve magnums ama
|
# ? May 29, 2015 00:51 |
|
SHISHKABOB posted:Words I have said very much the same thing for years; thank you for validating my opinion.
|
# ? May 29, 2015 01:02 |
|
Thunder Moose posted:I have said very much the same thing for years; thank you for validating my opinion. no problem
|
# ? May 29, 2015 02:03 |
|
TacticalUrbanHomo posted:the Trojan Horse was Achaean, dumbass, the condoms are called Trojans because the Trojans successfully defended against the Greeks for so long and had such protective, impenetrable walls is this a metaphor
|
# ? May 29, 2015 02:20 |
|
TacticalUrbanHomo posted:the Trojan Horse was Achaean, dumbass, the condoms are called Trojans because the Trojans successfully defended against the Greeks for so long and had such protective, impenetrable walls Wow this is a really good point! I wish I'd thought of it.
|
# ? May 29, 2015 03:29 |
|
TacticalUrbanHomo posted:the Trojan Horse was Achaean, dumbass, the condoms are called Trojans because the Trojans successfully defended against the Greeks for so long and had such protective, impenetrable walls but they failed and they all died they should call them leningrads for a city that withstood a besieging army for a long time
|
# ? May 29, 2015 03:39 |
|
i dont buy condoms because anytime i go near a woman they shriek and run in the opposite direction. the money i save from this can go towards my next warhammer figure.
|
# ? May 29, 2015 03:44 |
|
SHISHKABOB posted:but they failed good point they should put a warning on the condoms that say "if you deliberately open the condom up to let sperm through, then sperm will get through"
|
# ? May 29, 2015 03:49 |
|
i only use leonidas condoms
|
# ? May 29, 2015 03:56 |
|
SHISHKABOB posted:I mean, at first glance you think "heh, yeah, Trojan, Trojan horse, I get it!" and on a superficial level it's a very fitting name for a condom brand and it's a great marketing decision. Source your quotes
|
# ? May 29, 2015 04:00 |
|
i use trojan condoms but only ironically
|
# ? May 29, 2015 04:04 |
|
I don't use condoms protection is for pussies
|
# ? May 29, 2015 04:09 |
|
I fake all of my orgasms to stand up to the feminist agenda, op
|
# ? May 29, 2015 04:47 |
|
I order extra icing w my pizza Hut cinnasticks and keep a small amount of it preloaded in a straw in case I need to fake an orgasm in an emergency
|
# ? May 29, 2015 04:48 |
|
i just spill my seed all willy nilly anyway sneak my horse in the back door
|
# ? May 29, 2015 04:55 |
|
SHISHKABOB posted:I mean, at first glance you think "heh, yeah, Trojan, Trojan horse, I get it!" and on a superficial level it's a very fitting name for a condom brand and it's a great marketing decision. Nigga why you makin us read all this bullshit
|
# ? May 29, 2015 05:04 |
|
|
# ? Mar 19, 2024 12:13 |
|
that tl;dr got n****red
|
# ? May 29, 2015 05:05 |