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The Taint Reaper posted:When the library got new computers nobody knew how to fuckign work them so I would alter the settings sometimes because I was a social recluse and spent 95% of the time in the library from jr high to highschool and would then proclaim that the computers are being hacked from the outside.
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Jun 11, 2015 11:38
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TEAYCHES posted:she replaced a really good assistant orchestra director. she was like 40 and really bitchy and fat. most of all she couldnt keep time and shed conduct the orchestra in irregular hand motions, she just didnt seem to be trying hard and we had like the best high school orchestra in the state imo terrible. Christ forgives tho
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Jun 11, 2015 11:52
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On one of my birthdays we had a party at my friend's house (his parents weren't home of course). This was a counter-party to my official party where it was mostly family and I had to make a speech and crap, and a 4-course meal and suits. No no, this party at my friend's house was all junk food and videogames. But after a while we got bored and made a fire in his back yard. We burnt whatever we had - wood from the shed, paper, aerosol cans, lighter fluid, etc. We were all in boy scouts so we knew how to make a fire (my friend made Eagle/Queen's Scout a year later). Eventually even the fire got boring so we decided to burn a shopping trolley. Yeah, most of the trolley is steel, but the child's seat and wheel tires are not. That polyethylene "safety" child's seat burnt like crazy, and burnt for ages with a decent white flame. By dawn it was a charred wreck, so we dumped it on the council estates before anyone woke up.
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Jun 11, 2015 12:05
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IronClaymore posted:On one of my birthdays we had a party at my friend's house (his parents weren't home of course). This was a counter-party to my official party where it was mostly family and I had to make a speech and crap, and a 4-course meal and suits. No no, this party at my friend's house was all junk food and videogames. But after a while we got bored and made a fire in his back yard. We burnt whatever we had - wood from the shed, paper, aerosol cans, lighter fluid, etc. We were all in boy scouts so we knew how to make a fire (my friend made Eagle/Queen's Scout a year later). Eventually even the fire got boring so we decided to burn a shopping trolley. what the gently caress kind of family do you come from where you have to make speeches on your birthday? that's the most hosed up thing in this thread imo
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Jun 11, 2015 14:58
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Bardeh posted:what the gently caress kind of family do you come from where you have to make speeches on your birthday? that's the most hosed up thing in this thread imo what he is trying to say is; "i am a very privileged individual and i am entitled to your respect because of the stature of my parents, im a spoiled wormy fat nerd. now what was the question? oh, yes...etc." (hes kind of a gay fag)
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Jun 11, 2015 15:16
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ballass posted:what he is trying to say is; "i am a very privileged individual and i am entitled to your respect because of the stature of my parents, im a spoiled wormy fat nerd. now what was the question? oh, yes...etc." He's a boy scout bitch and should get out of my thread
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Jun 11, 2015 15:22
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one time i stood up to a bully by rights i prob should have been pasted by him but it actually ended in a cool after school special kind of way and we became sort of buds and he let me drive his moped. in my school having a moped was cool. i had my ups and downs but honestly i coasted through high school and whatever issues i had were mostly my own fault cuz i was a moody little poo poo who deserved to be knocked on the head for being dumb
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Jun 11, 2015 15:29
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PokeJoe posted:i had a teacher who used to gently caress one of his students. he got caught when he got drunk and wandered to her (parents) house at 2am looking to join her and some other high schoolers in a hot tub lol there was a teacher at my high school (spanish teacher) who was a weird looking fucker with bug eyes and always acted really strange. it turned out he was loving one of the girls from our sister school (woo catholic gender split schools). in retrospect i dunno how they didnt catch that poo poo sooner since he (the teacher) was in their school play of beauty and the beast as the beast and the girl he was loving was belle. they had to kiss on stage and stuff, still dunno why they gave a 30 year old teacher that role instead of another kid
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Jun 11, 2015 15:44
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i was supposed to do my homework but i didnt 
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Jun 11, 2015 15:46
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besides the obligatory drink/drug related foolhattery we also set many things on fire in the name of comedy and created many explosions probably the best of them was semi-intentionally making a propane cylinder BLEVE
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Jun 11, 2015 16:06
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Cool NIN Shirt posted:He's a boy scout bitch and should get out of my thread Yeah, you say that, but it at least taught us middle-class rich kids how to commit arson. There's also that thing how my friends and I invented an incredibly racist game and spent a day just running around pretending to shoot certain people from a certain background. That was genuinely hosed up. Come to think of it, that was the most hosed up thing of all, of my entire childhood, pretending to be attacked by [ethnic group], who were cannibals or something, and shooting them.
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Jun 11, 2015 16:14
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A friend of mine saw a memo on a teacher's desk with info on how to access the homework hotline, so we tried messing around with it and left a few funny messages then they changed the password after a couple days A month or so later, same friend guessed the password (it was pathetic) and left a poo poo ton of crazy messages of old soundboards and South Park clips and other early internet memes to punish them for their incompetence
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Jun 11, 2015 16:23
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Jun 11, 2015 16:28
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Zeno-25 posted:A friend of mine saw a memo on a teacher's desk with info on how to access the homework hotline, so we tried messing around with it and left a few funny messages then they changed the password after a couple days Haha thats pretty good. Points for originality
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Jun 11, 2015 16:52
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All these crAaAazy goons who cut a class to smoke some weed. lol My school kept a bunch of non-perishable food supplies in a huge trailer in the parking lot near the cafeteria. Sodas, snacks, chips, everything that you'd actually want to get at lunchtime was in there. A bunch of brand name stuff, too. Well they kept it padlocked, but there was a little window/door thing that they left open. I'm assuming they thought no one could get in there through that thing, but lucky for us we had a tiny little kid in our class that would climb in there like a little circus monkey and then start passing all the poo poo out to us. After a couple years they finally chained up that window/door thing. The seniors always did a prank but it was usually super lame. For 3 years in a row all they did was super glue all the school door locks. This was an outside school so you could just wander in and get every single classroom fairly quickly. It was funny the first time (no one could get in to any classes basically it was great) but then they started just taking the cost of repairs out of the prom fund. That poo poo wasn't super creative anyway. When I was a freshman the seniors forked the entire field the night before it needed to get used (for graduation I think). For my graduation, they held it at the school sports field. The night before someone had gotten up to the announcer's box, picked the lock, and hooked up a song on a timer to the school PA system. The next day, in the middle of the graduation ceremony, the whole graduating class, faculty, parents, etc. got rick rolled and they just had to sit through the whole song.
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Jun 11, 2015 17:01
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A couple friends and I used to get into people's network folders by guessing passwords. This was 92-93ish and students had a super secure 4 character password which was usually their date of birth, the current year, poop, oval office, gently caress, etc. Once inside, we'd save a batch file named something like tryme.bat and have it delete their files or if it was someone we liked, it would copy their files to a new folder and delete everything in the current folder so they'd just poo poo themselves a little before finding out everything was just moved. Oh, and as the bell rings: 10 Print "insert something hilarious" 20 goto 10 Leave class like nothing was going on. Not me, but one that I've never been sure how it was pulled off due to the location of our parking lot involved someone filling a kids Toyota truck bed full of manure during the school day.
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Jun 11, 2015 17:02
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One of the girls (read: absolute slut that was going to get knocked up if it wasn't a catholic school we were in) pulled down her pants and shook her rear end in front of everybody during math class when the teacher had to get more files. The "WOOOOO!" from the students and her skimpy dark-blue underwear still lingers in my mind in a very bad way. Also the same one that whispered "HE'S GOT A BONER LOOK!!!" whenever she saw a boy get up from their chair. There was also the time when all of the boys played football after lunch in the spring and the ivy league guy who excelled in math and sports accidentally got tackled into the side of a brick wall and had to get rushed to the hospital to get ~6 stitches on his head. Didn't see him until a few days before graduation since he was apparently tackled by one of the burly dudes who couldn't run for more than 13 seconds but was otherwise built like a shaved gorilla. Surprisingly healed up when he returned but still.   The most notable was by far an rear end in a top hat that snuck into the science lab at the school and played with all the chemicals there. During math class when he was missing and nobody noticed he ran back in the class and yelled about a gas cloud in the science lab with the best "I hosed up help" look in his eyes. Turns out, when you mix mystery liquids found only in a high school laboratory, you might accidentally create a poisonous gas that forces the whole school to be evacuated with hundreds of people running as fast as they can down stairs. During February (in my sophomore year, I think). And I live in northern Ohio aka American bootleg Siberia. Oops. It was easy to infer that he was the culprit behind the  accidental chemical mishap that could've killed a bunch of people. Fastest expel ever.
EorayMel fucked around with this message at 18:01 on Jun 11, 2015 |
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Jun 11, 2015 17:03
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Oh and obv all the computer fuckery. My favorite was going into word and into the autocorrect settings and setting innocuous words to autocorrect to misspelled versions (or even just 'gently caress'). The obvious "turn 'the' into 'gently caress'" was great for a quick laugh, the more subtle 'change words that are commonly used but not all the time to slightly misspelled variations' was great for a slow burn. Easy, quick, can't be traced back to you. I also liked popping off the 'm' and the 'n' keys on the keyboards and then switching them. We actually had a fairly competent IT set up so it wasn't easy to crack passwords (the teacher that taught the elective programming class used to be a software engineer and set it up) but little hardware hacks like that would drive people bonkers and the first few times the staff was utterly baffled (didn't even occur to them that the keys can be individually popped out and put back in lol).
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Jun 11, 2015 17:05
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I introduced a redneck trailer trash kid's face to pavement when he was trying to bully me after school, got away with it since he was a poo poo and the administration probably thought I was too much of a pussy to do something like that. Over a decade later, same guy now keeps inviting me over facebook to go have a beer. A junior in my school managed to get his ex unconscious via daterape pills, planning on driving the two of them down to a secluded river in a stolen hearse and killing her, them himself. He got caught before he could kill his ex, and I think he got at least 40 years.
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Jun 11, 2015 17:32
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EorayMel posted:One of the girls (read: absolute slut that was going to get knocked up if it wasn't a catholic school we were in) pulled down her pants and shook her rear end in front of everybody during math class with the teacher had to get more files. The "WOOOOO!" from the students still lingers in my mind and her skimpy dark-blue underwear still linger in my mind in a very bad way.
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Jun 11, 2015 17:34
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All my cool stories are computer related because I went to computer school and everyone was a loving nerd
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Jun 11, 2015 17:39
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I remember one chemistry teacher called Dave, he was about 40ish i genuinely don't remember his last name and obviously he would insist we call him Mr ( whatever ) and we would all go lol whatever Dave Anyway one day i was bored in class and i saw Dave helping this girl with her work so i shouted "look Dave's got a hardon!" Dave went bright red and stammered "i don't have an erection" then scurried back to his desk I got to stay after school as punishment and Dave's new nickname was Pedo Dave He had a breakdown and quit six months later I like to think i played a part in that 
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Jun 11, 2015 17:51
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Oh yeah I forgot about my computer class. Think of the most cranky, middle-aged, Real Housewive of X type, wrathful bitch of woman. Now imagine her with a massive "gently caress off" witch nose, beautiful black and long hair, literal hipster glasses, and a mole somewhere on her face. Now imagine her yelling at anybody that did not do EXACTLY what they were told to do in computer class and you have Ms. Pasci. I think that is how you spelt her name. One time when we had to make a comic book with this kickass program and google image search she caught one of the stupider, fatter kids just goofing around and not working and she erupted into the most fearful nagging imaginable. I believe that kid didn't speak for the rest of the day. I even caught her rushing one of the kids out into the hallway just to yell at the 5'3 ginger girl, who was sweet and innocent, until she cried. Poor thing  Then she tried to justify the whole yelling aspect by making up a story about how her old husband had a hearing problem and she had to raise her voice 24/7 just so he would hear her. I don't know how truthful that story was, but It didn't alleviate the situation. Also I was the biggest nerd in science class. I was the only one that raised my hand and nobody got scores near my 100's. My teacher was loving amazing though. My personal gooniest story is probably when the time for sex ed came along and everybody had to get a note from their parents for permission. I was the only kid that didn't get permission to see how sex works because I was sheltered like that so I just had to stand in the hallway for half an hour until the science teacher came out and was like "wtf are you doing?" I explained it to him and we went back to my homeroom and the teacher had the most disapproving "are you serious?" look on her face. Talk about a slow start.
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Jun 11, 2015 17:57
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lol not only am I not going to teach my teen about sex but you're not allowed to either if they don't know then maybe they won't ever gently caress. sex is bad, you see.
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Jun 11, 2015 18:11
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Not the coolest thing ever but 9th grade french class me and these other kids sat in the back. We were on a higher floor in the school and a pretty far drop to the ground. We were next to a bookshelf and a window. So when the teacher would have her back turned one of us would grab a book and real quick drop it out the window. After a couple seconds you'd hear a thud outside and the teacher would be completely oblivious to what was going on and I couldn't stop laughing at this.
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Jun 11, 2015 18:17
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Kawalimus posted:Not the coolest thing ever but 9th grade french class me and these other kids sat in the back. We were on a higher floor in the school and a pretty far drop to the ground. We were next to a bookshelf and a window. So when the teacher would have her back turned one of us would grab a book and real quick drop it out the window. After a couple seconds you'd hear a thud outside and the teacher would be completely oblivious to what was going on and I couldn't stop laughing at this. Haha no this is both cooler and funnier than many posts itt. Really captures that "high school" feeling. I do wonder, how did that teacher not notice that you were sitting by the window and put 2 + 2 together?
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Jun 11, 2015 18:20
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Cool NIN Shirt posted:Haha no this is both cooler and funnier than many posts itt. Really captures that "high school" feeling. She never said anything about it. I guess she never found anything out but someone must have found the books sitting outside cause they didn't all stay where they fell. Not sure if they ever made it back up or not. There was another time in that class too where we made a giant slingshot made out of tied together rubber bands across 3 desks and fired a wad of paper that barely missed that teacher's head. She noticed that one obviously and we all got detention. Was worth it!! Another thing I used to like that year was at lunch one of us would get pringles and after we ate we'd go out into the hall and throw the lid around like a mini frisbee. That was a lot of fun we had trick shots where we'd deflect them off the wall or fire it so it skimmed the ceiling. Then we incorporated gatorade caps into it and would stomp on them hard and pop them up into the air and kick them at each other. We even had a statistic for that called the "pop to hit ratio" which we never actually kept but it was a funny idea. And there was this teacher from the tech ed wing who would blow a fuse when he caught us doing this stuff. It got to the point where he just knew we were there and would start raging before he even got around the corner but it gave us a chance to get out of there. "WE DO NOT KICK THINGS OR THROW THINGS". I loved 9th grade.
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Jun 11, 2015 18:31
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One time a homeless guy tried to get on our band bus during a trip and our director kicked him down the stairs and out the door on his rear end
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Jun 11, 2015 18:32
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Ler posted:I went to an all boys private Catholic school. Wow Australia is bad
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Jun 11, 2015 18:38
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ballass posted:what he is trying to say is; "i am a very privileged individual and i am entitled to your respect because of the stature of my parents, im a spoiled wormy fat nerd. now what was the question? oh, yes...etc." He's a massive fag have you read his other posts lmao
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Jun 11, 2015 18:41
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Anybody ever use a plastic spoon to launch stuff across the lunchroom? Sometimes we'd use the corner of a half-inflated freezer bag but those were hard to come by
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Jun 11, 2015 18:41
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SHISHKABOB posted:He's a massive fag have you read his other posts lmao I do not have platinum please post some choice excerpts
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Jun 11, 2015 18:42
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Get a big turkey or chicken leg, preferably the size of the ones that they sell at Ren Fairs. Find a mason jar that will fit it inside. Fill the remaining space in the jar with milk, up to the very top. Seal the jar as best you can. Gases can condense, but liquids and solids can't. The decomposition of the turkey leg and the rancid milk cause pressure to build up over time, which eventually breaks the glass, letting out the god-forsaken odors that by that point had been building up for ages. Best way to be a dick and get the school closed for the day at the same time.
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Jun 11, 2015 18:45
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Cool NIN Shirt posted:I do not have platinum please post some choice excerpts Read the new China thread
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Jun 11, 2015 18:48
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I was tired one morning so I didn't stand for the Pledge of Allegiance in homeroom. A teacher who held class in there the rest of the day walked in, saw me, and started screaming at the top of his lungs at me. I just sat there and took it, as he had always been a jerk to me, but I don't take such things lightly. So while he continued to be a bully to me whenever he came into our homeroom, I went searching for ways to revenge myself against him. One day not long thereafter I noticed he left his computer logged in. So I decided that he should visit some rather illicit websites blocked -- and most importantly, logged -- by the school's firewall program. Now, I didn't do every day, oh no. I continued it gradually over the course of the year -- to build up a pattern, you see. Eventually, I escalated it google searching some terms no high school teacher should ever search for, especially not while on the job. Then, one day not long after searching for "man horse boy love," he wasn't in school for a couple of days. Interesting, I thought. The next week, he came storming in, demanding to know which of us had been using his computer. He knew one of "[us] little bastards" had done something, and demanded that someone rat out the culprit -- clearly giving me the stinkeye. Not one person said a word. The homeroom teacher (a very cool guy, at that time a year from retirement and clearly giving zero fucks) just sat at the back of the room and laughed. He stormed out in a huff. He never said anything about it ever again, nor did he ever leave his computer logged in anymore. Later, I had learned they hauled him before the disciplinary board, and apparently his (truthful!) denials were met with some skepticism, owing to the duration of the apparent transgressions. But he managed to escape with his job, I suppose, owing to reasonable doubt. But in the end he never said word one to me ever again, which I found quite agreeable. So yeah, that's how I almost ruined a man's career.
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Jun 11, 2015 19:03
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Any of you cats ever slip a tack onto the teachers chair? :sumg:
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Jun 11, 2015 19:17
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We gave our calculus teacher all kinds of hell that I feel bad about now as a grown up. He was this short, hella skinny guy that wore those kind of glasses you get in bootcamp, real nasally voice and not very assertive so the antics we got up to in his class kind of escalated as we saw how much we could actually get away with. There were never any repercussions until the day he snapped I guess. It was close to the end of the year and we had some seniors in the class who would sit there and read the newspaper( this was before smart phones and tablets were things) while Mr. M was at the board writing about God knows what. One of the guys spots an article about a manhunt going on, looking for some guy wanted for some pretty heinous crimes ( cant remember the specific numbers, but the guy had raped and killed a few women). The wanted man could have been Mr. M's twin, down to the glasses. So we break from that class and some guys go to the library and print out Mr. M's name in really small font, then pasted them over wherever the actual criminals name was mentioned in the article, and then made photo copies of the newspaper article. The following day we are back in Mr.M's class and stuck one on his corkboard. Then we start asking him why he isn't laying low, how awkward are encounters in the teachers lounge, etc etc... He finally notices the paper on the board and freaks out a little bit and pushes the emergency intercom button that you are supposed to use to let everyone know there is a school shooting or a ghost or whatever. School cop and principal come running in and M is just quivering with rage as he had time to read the article. I mean it was really shittily done, his name was a little too big and in completely different font than the rest of the article. School cop rails about how we are all going downtown for "libel, slander, defamation of character, and attacking a teachers credibility". We ended up getting 3 days suspension and had to write apology letters to Mr.M but that was it. loving idiot
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Jun 11, 2015 19:30
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My science teacher was going on forever about chlorophyll and I couldn't take it anymore and louder than I planned said "more like bore-ophyll!" this girl behind me leaned up to me and called me a loser or something, quiet enough I knew no one heard what she said, so I owned her good when I shouted out "no I will not make out with you!"
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Jun 11, 2015 19:41
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Vin BioEthanol posted:My science teacher was going on forever about chlorophyll and I couldn't take it anymore and louder than I planned said "more like bore-ophyll!" this girl behind me leaned up to me and called me a loser or something, quiet enough I knew no one heard what she said, so I owned her good when I shouted out "no I will not make out with you!" Did you ever get Swan to stop looking at you?
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Jun 11, 2015 19:45
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his girl behind me leaned up to me and called me a loser or something
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Jun 11, 2015 19:50
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