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shut up blegum
Dec 17, 2008


--->Plastic Lawn<---
"Now let's step all into conference room B where I will show you my powerpoint presentation. As you know, aunt Mary couldn't make it so we're gonna do a conference call."

Your christmas parties sound like fun.

EDIT: "Well then, looks like my glass of wine is empty. Cousin Raheem, can you please be doing the needful?"

shut up blegum fucked around with this message at 10:21 on Dec 9, 2015

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Kitchner
Nov 9, 2012

IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER
Clapping Larry

Solice Kirsk posted:

Having several cop and EMT friends I can confirm that as long as it seems good enough that an accident detective isn't gonna spend too long looking into a DUI that only killed the two drunkest people in one car.

That's what's I'm saying though, you don't have to look into it long before it looks dodgy.

From the description the guy said the passenger seat was soaked in blood and the driver cut himself up a bit (no mention of the passenger doing that). Likewise he says a piece of metal from his car skewered the driver of the other car, so it sounds like their car was totally hosed.

Despite this not only is the passenger in one piece enough to put into the other car, but that her presumably very obvious injuries (as she bled everywhere) didn't look out of place in the other car (despite the fact her I juries would have been on mostly her left side but the car she was in was mostly hit in the front).

We aren't talking CSI poo poo here guys, we're talking a coroner would spot this poo poo. Even if the cop was stupid enough to miss all this at the scene.

Tinestram
Jan 13, 2006

Excalibur? More like "Needle"

Grimey Drawer
Hey cucked goon, maybe your wife cheated on you because you're a big dumb baby who does extremely petty and childish poo poo like publicly humiliating people. Quite possibly this is just a knee-jerk emotional response and you're not normally this big of an idiot, but either way you need to re-examine this particular move.

HerStuddMuffin
Aug 10, 2014

YOSPOS
It would backfire horribly as everyone around the room glances at each other trying to figure out for whom exactly this is supposed to be news.

The Bible
May 8, 2010

HerStuddMuffin posted:

It would backfire horribly as everyone around the room glances at each other trying to figure out for whom exactly this is supposed to be news.

Yeah, sorry confessor. You are probably the last one to figure this out.

Deadbeat Poetry
Mar 6, 2004

Sorry if my costume scared you
Yeah homie, I hate it for you but if your PI has that kind of evidence just kick her rear end in court and be done with it. Everyone who doesn't know she's a hoe will find out soon enough.

Alternatively, kill them both and make a dash for mexico?

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.
Yeah, just take half her stuff in a divorce. Infidelity is one of the easiest ways to get a judge on your side. Hell, my unemployed, tattooed, criminal record having buddy could have gotten full custody of his kids and gotten paid alimony when his cop wife cheated on him with another cop. Judges go kinda bonkers when one person in the relationship is clearly at fault, and embarrassing her (or attempting to) in front of a bunch of family and friends ain't a good way to get ahead in the court's eyes.

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Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer
I've always hated these threads because they're 99% utter bullshit. And if the OP is just going to copy and paste every single thing they receive, no matter how obvious it is that they're fake, I'm going to close it like I have the many other ones.

loquacius posted:

I gently caress Lowtax's girl about once or twice every two weeks. Lowtax will never find out who I am because of the way our arrangement works. Although the loving may stop after word of this gets out. I met Ashli outside a restaurant/bar and she was pretty drunk and looking for her friend to give her a ride. After watching her stumble around a bit I asked if she needed a taxi that is when she started hanging all over me, telling me I smell good etc. So we slowly make it back to my car and that's when things got crazy. I took her back to my place we had some decent sex and exchanged numbers. We hook up a few times here and there, come to find out she is with someone but he has these psychotic meltdowns every once in a while and she just cant handle it. That is when I find out who he is and what he does, I then signed up out of curiosity and have been posting here since. Its kind of like being a fly on the wall while cucking his wife.
Christ, come on, seriously?

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