Nintendo's new Metroid game is

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Nintendo's new Metroid game is

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGu3Xe1uUUg

a giant piece of cocka doodoo.

What fans were probably expecting:

What Nintendo is delivering:

The response is so bad, that there's a petition to have Nintendoh cancel the game, and it already has over 12000 signatures. lol
https://www.change.org/p/nintendo-petition-for-cancelation-of-metroid-prime-federation-force

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:16

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 19:58

STABASS: Apr 18, 2009; Fun Shoe

Looks like it's for children and babies, like all video games

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:19

ass cobra: May 28, 2004; by Azathoth

Cantaloupe posted:

Looks like it's for children and babies, like all video games

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:21

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

Cantaloupe posted:

Looks like it's for children and babies, like all video games, except for Far Cry 4 which owned bones and should have been the official game of the year as well as this years game of the year it is soooo good

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:21

Wanamingo: Feb 22, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:22

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

Like, what if Nintendo actually cancels the game, and then they never make another Metroid game again because "it's too risky. lol".

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:24

Vulture Culture: Jul 14, 2003; I was never enjoying it. I only eat it for the nutrients.

they should just spend the $30 or whatever to translate mother 3

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:25

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

DaveSplitter posted:

Like, what if Nintendo actually cancels the game, and then they never make another Metroid game again because "it's too risky. lol".

Like, I literally want reggie or whatever his loving name is to literally say that at e3 next year, complete with the "lawl" at the end.

Then he'll present Nintendo's new mantear-powered console.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:26

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

DaveSplitter posted:

Like, I literally want reggie or whatever his loving name is to literally say that at e3 next year, complete with the "lawl" at the end.

Then he'll present Nintendo's new mantears-powered console.

I hope he sodomizes you with a wiimote.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:26

ArtIsResistance: May 19, 2007; QUEEN OF FRANCE, SAVIOR OF LOWTAX

I thought those screenshots were people making jokes what the heck the 3ds doesnt look that bad does it

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:27

Jerry Mumphrey: Mar 11, 2004; by zen death robot
(and can't post for 4 years!)

sign here indicating you are mad about a video game:

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:27

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

ArtIsResistance posted:

I thought those screenshots were people making jokes what the heck the 3ds doesnt look that bad does it

It's actually the canceled N64 Metroid game.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:29

Hector Beerlioz: Jun 16, 2010; aw, hec

Doesn't Nintendo have enough money they could run with a huge loss for the next 20 years before they run out of cash?

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:30

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Doesn't Nintendo have enough money they could run with a huge loss for the next 20 years before they run out of cash?

That would explain why they're not trying to make money any more.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:32

Orkin Mang: Nov 1, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

looks great op!! thnaks for the heads up, im defintiely buying THIS one! will it fit up my rear end???

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:32

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

Seriously, all I wanted was a Metroid title with a large planet to explore and next gen graphics. God drat.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:34

quakster: Jul 21, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Take A Good Look At Me; im ah gay manatee! the audience claps their hands, i grab my cock, they drop their pants. ARF ARF ARF

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:37

Orkin Mang: Nov 1, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

quakster posted:

Take A Good Look At Me; im ah gay manatee! the audience claps their hands, i grab my cock, they drop their pants. ARF ARF ARF

gently caress yeah!!!!

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:37

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

if you thought the 3ds was capable of running graphics like are in that first picture you are a loving retard moron anyway

quote:

I signed it , honestly i refuse to just loving let them ignore us and not listen to their gaming audience. I REFUSE to let them walk all over us and pretend this was a good idea, this is a travesty to the metroid series and NOBODY asked for this , EVERYONE wanted ANYTHING but a loving SOCCER METROID GAME AND SAMUS ISNT EVEN IN IT. This is disguting so yeah i signed it and im happy i did becuase maybe now they�ll finally listen to us.

LOL

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:38

solo humping pro: Jun 4, 2015

quakster posted:

Take A Good Look At Me; im ah gay manatee! the audience claps their hands, i grab my cock, they drop their pants. ARF ARF ARF

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:38

Putty: Mar 21, 2013; HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

DaveSplitter posted:

Like, I literally want reggie or whatever his loving name is to literally say that at e3 next year, complete with the "lawl" at the end.

Then he'll present Nintendo's new mantear-powered console.

don't act like you don't know Reggie's name or he'll take yours

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:40

ballistics statistics: Nov 27, 2003; God I fucking love Diablo 3 gold, it even paid for this shitty title

Why do idiots think change.org is there for them to post about being mad about video games?

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:40

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

ThaGrandCow posted:

Why do idiots think change.org is there for them to post about being mad about video games?

impotent rage

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:40

solo humping pro: Jun 4, 2015

63,405 people want to see obama's dick

please sign me petition

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:41

Orkin Mang: Nov 1, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

ive got barrack on the line right now and hes just as poissed as i am

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:41

ArtIsResistance: May 19, 2007; QUEEN OF FRANCE, SAVIOR OF LOWTAX

ThaGrandCow posted:

Why do idiots think change.org is there for them to post about being mad about video games?

haha you think change.org has an actual purpose

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:41

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

"Tetsuma Kurono" from "Virtual City Alpha" in Oklahoma (read: weeabo white boy)

quote:

Well, time for another silent observer to finally leave the stands and take to the field.

Where to begin....I suppose as others have said, we waited 5 years for the next entry in the series, and the best Nintendo can come up with is the soul successor to Hunters; a rather childish and far more gimmicky rendition at that. While I do like the fact that they have started to explore the use of the Federation Suit, this was not the way it should have been used. Furthermore, the model is scaled to the size of a Mii and the design is something between the Fed Suit from Prime 2 and Prime 3. And was that Phendrana Drifts?

I can say that for the most part, Metroid Prime Hunters was an enjoyable experience, maybe a bit short for the single player. That game is really what introduced alot of the concepts and exploration that is seen in Metroid Prime 3. Unfortunately, the gimmicky controls, namely the encouraged use of the stylus for aiming, made it hard to play as a 'Prime' game. As for the multiplayer, it actually worked quite well, despite the abudant disconnects and Action Replay users.

Now would I want to see another Hunters entry? Not likely. What makes for a true Metroid experience is the strange environments, the incredible and memorable music, and the platforming elements. Think back to the first release of Metroid. All the environments had a very dark tone to them and were very mysterious. Everytime you finally found a new elevator, you would think, "Uh oh, where am I going now?". Then as the room is shown, there is not a name given to the area, but instead, it was the music that gave the area it's name. The music and the area theme. The 8-bit pallete of the era really made that stand out.

Is Nintendo trying to shy away from darker games? Are they afraid that the dark theme of the franchise will be a stain on their image? If they stay on the road that they're on, they might as well partner with Fisher-Price, as it seems they are hell bent on making games that target much younger audiences. Nintendo use to have titles that targeted all age groups, but now it seems all we get are games that are candy-land, Mario Party experiences.

Nintendo, if you want an example of how to bring new life into the Metroid series, you should really observe and respect the work of DoctorM64. He is the creator of the project AM2R, an excellent and very faithful reenvisioning of Metroid 2: The Return of Samus. It has the same style and gameplay as Zero Mission, which is the best 2D Metroid engine you've made. But in addition to the gameplay, what really has made AM2R successful is the plethora of new bosses and content, as well as the cut-scenes and surprises you encounter as you traverse the tunnels.

To bring this to a close, I think for Nintendo's current direction, this game that happens to have a Metroid branding on it, would be fine. But to go so far as releasing this as a Metroid game because it uses assets from Prime? This I cannot stand behind. Nintendo, remember the glory days of R&D1. Remember the great works that team released. Remember the trials and tribulations that you and Retro Studios went through and the efforts that made the Prime series a success.

...And to DoctorM64, keep up the great work! You're nearly there, and as it seems Nintendo has let us down again, myself and other loyal fans of the series eagerly await the completion of the project. If it is a new Metroid game that we want, AM2R is surely the answer.

lol if he thinks anyone is reading all that poo poo

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:41

quakster: Jul 21, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

ArtIsResistance posted:

I thought those screenshots were people making jokes what the heck the 3ds doesnt look that bad does it

3ds actually looks even worse. motion masks it pretty well, though

Orkin Mang posted:

looks great op!! thnaks for the heads up, im defintiely buying THIS one! will it fit up my rear end???

you'll only absorb the game's essence if you eat it, sorry

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:42

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

quote:

I'm signing this petition because Metroid is supposed to be a deep, immersive game about bounty hunters traveling foreign worlds, not gimmicky chibi soldiers and soccer. As a Metroid fan, I'm very offended at this mockery of a game. Give us Metroid Prime 4 on Wii U!

quote:

How is this metroid? Why would they pass this garbage for a beloved, HARDCORE franchise. This is unnacceptable. At the very least, change the name and character design. This is NOT a metroid game. Give the fans what they want.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:43

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

Putty posted:

don't act like you don't know Reggie's name or he'll take yours

"Ohhh Reggie-San, please destroy my virgin rear end in a top hat with your wiimote!"

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:43

solo humping pro: Jun 4, 2015

i love when nerds begin their stupid diatribe with "i have been silent for too long! Now! Now!!! I let the world know my rage!!!" as if they were some great person that we should have known about

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:43

Hector Beerlioz: Jun 16, 2010; aw, hec

ThaGrandCow posted:

Why do idiots think change.org is there for them to post about being mad about video games?

Because if you get enough signatures Obama will personally handle the matter.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:44

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

i love when nerds are like "just change the name it looks like a fun game but it is NOT METROID"

like no true fuckin metroid bros. gotta have the ultimate FPS scifi hardcore simulation OR IT IS A loving CATASTROPHE

quote:

Sheev Palpatine THE THRONE ROOM, VI

Oh no, Nintendo. You will find that it is you who are mistaken, about a great many things.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:45

Jimbo Jaggins: Jul 19, 2013

It looks ok for a 3ds game imho.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:45

solo humping pro: Jun 4, 2015

Jimbo Jaggins posted:

It looks ok for a 3ds game imho.

MODS? MODS???

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:46

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Jimbo Jaggins posted:

It looks ok for a 3ds game imho.

quote:

This honestly, truly, looks like a tech demo of an unreleased 90s game that nobody wanted to buy...with "Metroid Prime" slapped on the title.

How games can pass with having horrid graphics like this is unfathomable.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:46

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Because if you get enough signatures Obama will personally handle the matter.

Hopefully we'll nuke Japan again.

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:47

solo humping pro: Jun 4, 2015

jsut nuke the entire loving world get this poo poo over with

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:47

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

this guy literally wants a sidescroller remake

quote:

5 years since Other M. 5 long years I would wait and sit through E3 waiting year after year to see it. Metroid: Dread, Metroid Prime 4, anything. You gave us what we asked for though didn't you? Am I pleased? No, rather I would wait another 5 years for the Metroid game we want. A side-scroller, an homage to what we fell in love with nearly 30 years ago, a new Prime with new weapons, upgraded mechanics and a killer soundtrack. You trusted Retro with this series almost 13 years ago, and we got gold. This go around, we got garbage. I'm not just mad Nintendo, I am disappointed.

bros just play the old games then sorry loving nobody wants a game with 30 year old gameplay

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:47

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 19:58

Orkin Mang: Nov 1, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

gently caress

# ? Jun 18, 2015 22:47

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