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The bad pick-up line thread got me thinking: What is the unsexiest description of sex you can come up with? Here is my favorite: "My penis sneezed ball-snot into the kleenex of her cleavage"
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Jul 11, 2015 08:02
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| # ? Apr 24, 2024 23:19 |
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Jul 11, 2015 08:05
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this thead sux
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Jul 11, 2015 08:13
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tongue punch my fart box my pantaloons very tight baby, yes
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Jul 11, 2015 08:15
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OH YES OH SATAN YES
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Jul 11, 2015 08:17
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I'm sorry coroner, I don't have any money. Is there any OTHER way I can pay for the autopsy?
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Jul 11, 2015 08:18
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just gotta wait 4 minuts before e cig because im doin 30 minutes each sry im antsy cause right now it's halftime here's what i tyhink of the theaD RIGHT NOW
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Jul 11, 2015 08:20
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Did someone order a pizza with a hole cut in it for my erect penis to insert through?
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Jul 11, 2015 09:01
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"Is that a cattle?"
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Jul 11, 2015 09:03
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"My humps. My humps my humps my humps. My lovely lady lumps". Lady lumps = breast cancer. " I wanna gently caress you like an animal" Mount her with your tiny animal prick for 30 seconds, while David Attenborough watches? EvilGenius fucked around with this message at 09:11 on Jul 11, 2015 |
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Jul 11, 2015 09:07
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Do you have stairs in ur house
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Jul 11, 2015 09:21
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Bring back lf
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Jul 11, 2015 09:22
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better luck next time sheng-ji
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Jul 11, 2015 09:25
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Rickycat posted:this thead sux Have either of these two seen how people eat?
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Jul 11, 2015 09:25
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go gently caress urself bitch
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Jul 11, 2015 09:26
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Cursed Lumberjack posted:better luck next time sheng-ji Yeah actually theyd be pretty good porn lines
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Jul 11, 2015 09:28
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taste my golden terror mist
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Jul 11, 2015 09:38
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Rand alPaul posted:Have either of these two seen how people eat? big surprise here folks a goon doesnt recognize the right way to eat a butthole
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Jul 11, 2015 09:40
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Hello, I'm here to unclog your toilet with my dick. Wait...why are you taking off my pants?!?!
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Jul 11, 2015 10:01
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Joust posted:Hello, I'm here to unclog your toilet with my dick. Wait...why are you taking off my pants?!?! for me "unclogging my toilet with my dick" is what i call getting a beejer from your mom
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Jul 11, 2015 10:08
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Cursed Lumberjack posted:for me "unclogging my toilet with my dick" is what i call getting a beejer from your mom I've seen this one.
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Jul 11, 2015 10:16
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oh lol i was watching the 2nd season of silicon valley earlier today and at one point it shows the ceo of a porntube-type company in a meeting talking to a bunch of other porn business leaders and it cuts to a few of them at a time to show their little nameplates and lots were funny but one was "POOP ON MY WIFE!" and i just fuckin lost my poo poo e: Let's Try Fisting was another good one and i wouldnt be shocked if that was an actual company
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Jul 11, 2015 10:19
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Are those my feet?
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Jul 11, 2015 12:19
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- As meninas, os capangas querem que você merda e vomitar sobre si. Mastigar não é opcional!
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Jul 11, 2015 12:35
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im gay
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Jul 11, 2015 12:38
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"Hey baby, how about you come over to my place and we write bad porn lines?"
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Jul 11, 2015 12:57
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Rambling Robot posted:- As meninas, os capangas querem que você merda e vomitar sobre si. Mastigar não é opcional! google translate strikes again
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Jul 11, 2015 13:25
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Dropping loads! Dropping loving loads!
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Jul 11, 2015 13:34
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if I were a turd, I would want to be a turd in your butt
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Jul 11, 2015 13:53
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lets poop back and forth, forever
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Jul 11, 2015 14:06
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Well, I got my friends, some beer and Schindlers List on a bigscreen T.V. How could this get any better?
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Jul 11, 2015 14:10
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i put a finger puppet on my dick say hello to my li'l fren!
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Jul 11, 2015 14:13
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i say that in a tony montana voice, its a reference to scarface, which wad a movie
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Jul 11, 2015 14:14
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Let's gently caress into the night, like for hours baby, I'm talkin' sorry I just came, night.
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Jul 11, 2015 19:50
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My love for you allows me to pray to the spirit of eternal beauty and tenderness mirrored in your eyes or fling you down under me on that softy belly of yours and gently caress you up behind, like a hog riding a sow, glorying in the very stink and sweat that rises from your arse.
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Jul 11, 2015 19:53
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I am delighted to see that you do like being hosed arseways.
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Jul 11, 2015 19:58
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quote:when I was watching porn for my book... I literally didn't know what to do with myself. I was almost weeping on the floor. There was one scene... where you've got a guy with a woman's head down a toilet and he's penetrating her from behind, and people should just know there's a sort of trigger alert here, and he's got her head in the toilet and he's flushing it and he's screaming at her, I am gonna gently caress you 'til your motherfucker comes up from the loving grave... I couldn't do anything, I literally just rendered... I was like, I was like paralyzed.
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Jul 11, 2015 20:03
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WX8ZeZJqOE0 So old, but so good and dumb.
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Jul 11, 2015 20:14
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*Knock knock* Delivery man: Delivery! Girl: Ooh that's a nice big package you got there! Delivery man: Thanks. But it's actually for you. Just sign here. Girl: Mmmm okay. So do I get to open my package now? *giggles* Delivery man: Oh definitely *Starts to take off pants* Girl: Ooh it's so hard! *Grabs his junk* Delivery man: Just be careful because I have that same disease as Mr. Glass where I have brittle-AHHHHHHH *Girl accidentally breaks off his junk and blood starts spraying everywhere as the dude crumples to the floor in apocalyptic pain*
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Jul 11, 2015 20:18
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| # ? Apr 24, 2024 23:19 |
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Oh how delightful, oral copulation in return for goods delivered.
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Jul 11, 2015 20:19
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