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Well.... quite frankly.... this shocking news has even this reporter.... absolutely speechless I'm afraid. Um.... we're now going to the live feed in the States where, yes, I believe the rumours are true... ...and indeed they are. A mystical vortex of sorts has ripped open in the sky and arcane creatures of otherworldly origin appear to be crossing through wreaking decimation and slaughter. It is the actual Apocalypse, ladies and gents. Right on schedule.
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Jul 31, 2015 20:50
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I guess it belongs here as well Sponsorships are a great source of revenue. Make America great again!
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Jul 31, 2015 21:22
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Jul 31, 2015 22:34
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Aug 1, 2015 02:12
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...and then I said, "Pay taxes? What am I, poor?!" Ha! Speaking of which, let's light this firecracker. Let loose the peasant.
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Aug 1, 2015 07:47
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Utterly magnificent.
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Aug 1, 2015 16:24
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Jamoke you deserve to be trump's VP
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Aug 1, 2015 19:39
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Aug 2, 2015 01:10
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We've managed to complete our deliberations, despite that the d.j. was a total jerk and wouldn't turn it down and the stupid waiter kept messing up my apple cosmotini. I mean, how useless can you be?... Anyway, so, like, we find there to be insufficient evidence to move forward with the impeachment process at this juncture and hereby dismiss all charges or whatever. *clack* *clack* Congratulations Mr. Pookiebear... whoopsie, I mean, Mr. President. Jamoke fucked around with this message at 03:29 on Aug 2, 2015 |
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Aug 2, 2015 03:26
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This evening's top story: a multitude of questions arise as millions mysteriously go missing from the U.S. Mint. Who could have done it and where did it go? And perhaps most curious of all, why were heavy Sacajawea gold coins the only currency taken? Federal investigators are baffled as to why the higher value and much lighter paper notes were left untouched during the brazen after hours heist. When reached for comment, President Trump merely shrugged adding, quote, "Dunno lol." somewhere in the Swiss Alps...
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Aug 2, 2015 09:54
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Aug 2, 2015 13:28
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Christ, that portrait.
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Aug 2, 2015 21:55
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Aug 2, 2015 22:49
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The Obama Monument is brilliant.
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Aug 3, 2015 04:26
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What the....? BRING ME WHOEVER IS RESPONSIBLE the next day... Photoshop! Do you understand?! PHOTOSHOP! YOU CAN'T DO THIS!! I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT THAT SITE ANYMORE!!! Make it quick, boys. I'm running late for a humanitarian benefit.
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Aug 3, 2015 05:44
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lmao
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Aug 3, 2015 06:22
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Aug 3, 2015 07:22
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*pinch*
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Aug 3, 2015 08:45
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Obama monument shoulda opened "~10:30AM"
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Aug 3, 2015 13:12
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I legit support this addition to the capital lawn.
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Aug 3, 2015 15:04
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Aug 3, 2015 15:05
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Aug 4, 2015 00:58
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"You've all heard my proposal. Bottom line, I'm going through with this with or without you. So the only question is, which horse do you wanna back, eh?" 3 weeks later...
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Aug 4, 2015 01:37
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Why is Florida separate/the color of Mexico?
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Aug 4, 2015 05:17
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Fuschia tude posted:Why is Florida separate/the color of Mexico? sold to mexico for $1 and a sixer of corona to make room for new 50th state
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Aug 4, 2015 05:47
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And Jamoke is somehow not being paid for any of this?
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Aug 4, 2015 05:53
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Something Else posted:And Jamoke is somehow not being paid for any of this? obvs that he's a Trump plant I have no problem with it
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Aug 4, 2015 05:58
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Aug 4, 2015 07:30
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Aug 4, 2015 09:16
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is pepe420 trump's gang tag
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Aug 4, 2015 09:19
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Gawker staff loves dank memes and weed I guess.
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Aug 4, 2015 09:21
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I'd love to see a photoshop of trump on the body of Prince (and the Revolution)
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Aug 4, 2015 16:14
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Aug 4, 2015 17:07
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shaitan posted:I'd love to see a photoshop of trump on the body of Prince (and the Revolution)
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Aug 4, 2015 21:50
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Jamoke posted:"You've all heard my proposal. Bottom line, I'm going through with this with or without you. So the only question is, which horse do you wanna back, eh?" 
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Aug 5, 2015 01:56
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Aug 5, 2015 01:59
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drat that's really good.
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Aug 5, 2015 02:10
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Aug 5, 2015 02:28
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Aug 5, 2015 02:29
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Amazing
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Aug 5, 2015 03:38
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