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FilthyImp
Sep 30, 2002

Anime Deviant

Mince Pieface posted:

Our group isn't large compared to the really popular LARPS (Around 10-20 people each month), but they are all cool people, and we've never run into any really problematic behavior.
Those are all rules that would repulse the kind of whack job LARPERS that are drawn to WoD's broken rear end social component. Preventative measures, in other words.

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Vagon
Oct 22, 2005

Teehee!
So.. What happens when a good looking, charismatic person shows up to one of these events? Do they already? Do the pitchforks come out by the other guys/girls(Depending on the gender of said newcomer) or does some insane cult of personality prop up around them?

Edit: I don't want this to sound like I'm saying all larpers are ugly social retards, I just meant in comparison to the other players. I'm sorry if this came off as too blunt/offensive in any way, it wasn't intentional.

Camrath
Mar 19, 2004

The UKMT Fudge Baron


Vagon posted:

So.. What happens when a good looking, charismatic person shows up to one of these events? Do they already? Do the pitchforks come out by the other guys/girls(Depending on the gender of said newcomer) or does some insane cult of personality prop up around them?

Edit: I don't want this to sound like I'm saying all larpers are ugly social retards, I just meant in comparison to the other players. I'm sorry if this came off as too blunt/offensive in any way, it wasn't intentional.

Speaking for the events I go to, it's mostly just normal looking people; perhaps with a preponderance towards facial hair and nerdy hobbies, but barring a few outliers nothing you wouldn't see down your normal town centre (y'know, except for everyone wearing chain mail and poo poo). When I started larping I was tall, blond, slim and ripped (now I'm just tall and blond with the biggest shoulders in the field) so I came in for a lot of flirting, but nothing ever came of it. I did have one toothless crone from the unicorns faction try to interest me in a threesome (the Unicorns have a reputation for such things, like the Bears do for alcoholism and the Vipers for being potheads), but I didn't take her up on it despite not having had a sniff of pussy in eight months at the time. ;p

Given I play a pimp in-game I've had some people make and female not know where the line lies between IC and OOC but generally just a friendly 'not interested' or 'inappropriate' solves the issue.

Calico Heart
Mar 22, 2012

"wich the worst part was what troll face did to sonic's corpse after words wich was rape it. at that point i looked away"



Ghogargi posted:

spooky larp

This sounds cool as balls and now i think larping is cool.

Remedy this by sharing stories of the biggest LARP assholes/biggest dick moves y'all have ever come across

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

Don't you tell me my business again.
I have sort of a dumb question. Why, instead of dedicating your life to something as soul crushing and ultimately unrewarding as LARP, don't the players just get involved in community theater and put on a play or something if they like to play dress up and act? Even an improv type of thing?

I enjoy board games and even got into D&D for a while when I was a teen. Tried it again when I had a midlife crisis around 40 and found the players to be mostly insufferable and horrible. I think you're right, that there's some sort of overcompensating going on and a need to fill a void. Almost everybody I played with when I tried to take up role playing again was more interested in the power fantasy that comes with the game instead of the story telling and character building aspect of it.

Not sure what I mean here but there definitely seemed to be an "emptiness" or some sort of void that players were attempting to fill, probably including myself, but it didn't take me long to get turned off to it.

Something Else
Dec 27, 2004

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022
One time I was tripping balls on acid in my college town and we walked down to the park. First thing we saw was this 6'5" ogre of a man with a giant anime sword get out of a minivan and go "Thanks, Mom." This alone made us all giggle but we followed him and it turns out there were a bunch of LARPers play-fighting with foam weapons in the middle of the field, so we laid on a knoll and watched for a while. It was fascinating and hilarious. At one point a little black Scottie dog ran up to us and I said, "Ello ello ello, wot's all this then?" and that got a pretty good laugh from my crew. It was really a beautiful day.

Milkfred E. Moore
Aug 27, 2006

'It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism.'

BiggerBoat posted:

I have sort of a dumb question. Why, instead of dedicating your life to something as soul crushing and ultimately unrewarding as LARP, don't the players just get involved in community theater and put on a play or something if they like to play dress up and act? Even an improv type of thing?

One of these requires hard work and the ability to compromise with other people, particularly improv theatre.

The other allows you to be the belle of the ball.

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.

Vagon posted:

So.. What happens when a good looking, charismatic person shows up to one of these events? Do they already? Do the pitchforks come out by the other guys/girls(Depending on the gender of said newcomer) or does some insane cult of personality prop up around them?

Edit: I don't want this to sound like I'm saying all larpers are ugly social retards, I just meant in comparison to the other players. I'm sorry if this came off as too blunt/offensive in any way, it wasn't intentional.

You wouldn't believe the number of people who fill this category that go to LARPs. Now don't get me wrong, there are a lot of fat balding men and women so skinny you'd assume they were skeletons except they have hair down to their non existent rear end and several who either were blasted in the face with a shotgun or used sulfuric acid to "cure" their acne because their face is all hosed up. But a lot of people show up who you'd be surprised are hanging out with a group of people like this. Often successful, good looking, charismatic men and women will show up and play.

And these are often the creepiest and scariest out of the entire bunch. No poo poo. These people are getting their inner demons out playing these games. They're often times worse than the lifers. :smith:

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

Mince Pieface posted:

So me and my friends run a small LARP out of southern California every month. Our game is not any of the popular LARP systems, and most of the people we play with don't play any of the popular LARPs or have any interest in them. I think a big part of the reason for the famed toxicity of the general LARP community is that frankly, every single one of them has terrible loving game design.
As mentioned by some other posters, almost every popular larp massively favors older players over newbies, encourages out of session scheming and has insanely complicated rules with terrible presentation. All of this combines to drive out any sensible people who aren't willing to be poo poo on for 2-3 years by the inner circle of people who've been in the game forever. Basically, the only people willing to stick it out in these terrible systems are people who don't value their time or self at all.
So, the key to LARPing without having all this terrible poo poo happen is to make a system that is simple, friendly to casual/newer players, and naturally breaks up cliques that form.
We accomplish this by having a system that:
1) Runs without a dedicated GM (thereby avoiding the problem of GM cliques and favoritism)
2) Has 0 accumulation of character power over time. This puts new players on the same level as experienced players, and has the side benefit of driving off the toxic shitheads who can't handle not being able to lord over the dirty casuals.
3) Putting a strict limit on how long we can make the rules document, so new players aren't put at a disadvantage through not being able to understand the rules, and lowering the barrier to entry so people without gaming experience can play
4) Rules that don't allow weird/disturbing roleplaying behavior such as seduction/mind control/sexual acts without all parties explicit consent.

Our group isn't large compared to the really popular LARPS (Around 10-20 people each month), but they are all cool people, and we've never run into any really problematic behavior.

You guys seem to have a zero tolerance for shenanigans, which is awesome. I ran a troupe for a year+, and we had that, too - if someone was obviously a jerk or creep, we asked them to leave the group. The horrible stuff that happened in the global club didn't really occur on the same level, because we offered strict advocacy for people who had legit complaints. But just because there aren't assholes doesn't mean the group is healthy.

The games in the troupe were never plagued with in-fighting. Out Storytellers were dedicated to using sheets as little as possible, providing really good plots that encouraged roleplay over stats, and everyone was very much into cooperation. We had things called 'drama-bombs' where a scene would pause, the storyteller would narrate something dramatic happening, and the ten minutes that followed could NOT be used in using sheets. Everyone had to roleplay the reaction. Worked beautifully. The games honestly were great, from a Lifer's perspective.

That was actually one of the problems I had. Because I created this troupe and helped shape the way it would conduct games, I was tailoring it to my illnesses to be used as my coping mechanism and self-medication. I am not an douche in basic personality (I was a people-pleaser), so it never involved PvP, douchey mechanics, bullying or imbalanced sheets. What it involved was getting everyone deeper into the fantasy. Lifers loved it, because they weren't healthy. We did elaborate sets/decorations, had costume-making nights, built nifty props and rewarded people for their involvement - not with extra powers or skills for their sheets, but with tokens that granted them special moments in plot, or dramatic reveals from their past. Now, for the healthy folks who really saw it as a hobby and not a way of life, it was a non-issue. But it tipped a lot of people over the edge from casual into Lifer, and I hate that it did. It promised them excitement and emotional highs, a group of people who would praise and admire you the more you sunk into it, and never even hinted that you might have an issue that could benefit from professional help. And, just like with the global club, my troupe Lifers were unhealthy.

The guys who are talking about losing their SOs to LARP/gaming don't seem to know or care how the mechanics worked, or how the group was structured and run. It was the total immersion and the untethering from reality that destroyed their relationships. I am in NO way suggesting your group is like that - I've seen casual LARP groups or tabletop groups who have zero Lifers in them. Lifers won't be interested in a group where they can't immerse and make it their everything, so they won't join. I just think that rules can't guarantee LARP being good for sick people.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

Vagon posted:

So.. What happens when a good looking, charismatic person shows up to one of these events? Do they already? Do the pitchforks come out by the other guys/girls(Depending on the gender of said newcomer) or does some insane cult of personality prop up around them?

Edit: I don't want this to sound like I'm saying all larpers are ugly social retards, I just meant in comparison to the other players. I'm sorry if this came off as too blunt/offensive in any way, it wasn't intentional.

In my experience - they don't stick around. Either they decide the casual fun of LARP isn't worth putting up with the crazies (and because they already have good lives, it's not a big deal to give up LARP), or they get bored. Really, I should've hung up my hat a dozen or more times during my LARPing career just from the insanity I witnessed. Seriously. Would you stay in a book club with a dude who describes the themes of every novel in graphic sexually violent terms? Would you host your local bowling league if they came over and one of them pissed on your floor? I dunno, maybe some people would. But it seems pretty counter-intuitive. The people who turn a blind eye to that poo poo do so because what they desperately need is worth suffering all that nonsense.

It's not offensive. There's a reason LARPers have a stereotypical look and behavior, Trilbys and M'Ladys all 'round. Just browsing this collection - http://flickrhivemind.net/Tags/wod,worldofdarkness - you get a good idea (I just did an image search for WoD LARP Group, and I didn't go pages in, to make sure I'm not deliberately showing folks I used to know).


Skunkrocker posted:

You wouldn't believe the number of people who fill this category that go to LARPs. Now don't get me wrong, there are a lot of fat balding men and women so skinny you'd assume they were skeletons except they have hair down to their non existent rear end and several who either were blasted in the face with a shotgun or used sulfuric acid to "cure" their acne because their face is all hosed up. But a lot of people show up who you'd be surprised are hanging out with a group of people like this. Often successful, good looking, charismatic men and women will show up and play.

And these are often the creepiest and scariest out of the entire bunch. No poo poo. These people are getting their inner demons out playing these games. They're often times worse than the lifers. :smith:

The guy accused of rape, the absolute worst LARPer I have ever known, was an assistant DA. You are correct, sir.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

BiggerBoat posted:

I have sort of a dumb question. Why, instead of dedicating your life to something as soul crushing and ultimately unrewarding as LARP, don't the players just get involved in community theater and put on a play or something if they like to play dress up and act? Even an improv type of thing?

I enjoy board games and even got into D&D for a while when I was a teen. Tried it again when I had a midlife crisis around 40 and found the players to be mostly insufferable and horrible. I think you're right, that there's some sort of overcompensating going on and a need to fill a void. Almost everybody I played with when I tried to take up role playing again was more interested in the power fantasy that comes with the game instead of the story telling and character building aspect of it.

Not sure what I mean here but there definitely seemed to be an "emptiness" or some sort of void that players were attempting to fill, probably including myself, but it didn't take me long to get turned off to it.

For me, personally - I felt too worthless to succeed in theater, or anything for that matter, despite a deep love of it. A lot of LARPers suffer from depression, social anxiety and any number of mental cocktails that'll stymie them from being productive in their lives. Many I knew had no driver's license, or job, or home. The parents' basement caricature is pretty correct sometimes. That's the whole theme of this thread - Lifers in LARP are unhealthy, and LARP makes it worse, not better.

BiggerBoat posted:

Fascinating thread.

So LARPing is basically D&D without the little plastic figures, the dice and a drawn map?

As an addict, an alcoholic and someone who suffers from depression, I'm amazed at the parallels between this type of addiction and the ones I use to self medicate. I've seen friends go down the loving rabbit hole with poo poo like WOW, lose their lives, and chastise me for drinking and smoking.

I agree it's hypocritical, but people rarely confront their own demons when there's an opportunity to project onto someone else. I know I did, even to the point of openly mocking other Lifers because they did something I didn't do. I was just as bad, I just didn't do that one aspect. It was ridiculous.

I think it is MUCH harder to break free from a physical+psychological addiction than just a psychological one, but I hope you do it. It's not a chastisement, it's just being on the other side and seeing how amazing it is here. If you've had depression a long time, you can't even comprehend what it'll feel like to get better. I was staggered.

These two posts kinda melded for me because I wanted to talk about bottoming out and the climb back up. So, Deep Blathering Time, skip the below if uninterested, or if you don't want to know how evil I was.

For about six years, I had a routine - whenever I noticed a LARP dude was paying some attention to me, I would 'innocently' and companionably invite him to make character ties with mine. It was always in-character stuff; I wasn't interested in reality. I wanted to get my fix in the place where I felt the most beautiful, powerful (seductive) and worthwhile. So, we'd start building character ties. After a bit, I could tell whether or not they would be what I needed: someone who'd fall completely for me, to the point of obsession/worship. It was going to take a lot of attention and praise to sate me, so it had to be that deep level of besotted-ness. If they looked like they were headed that way, I'd start RPing with them online a lot, and doing side-scenes at game alone with them. Nothing physical and, sometimes, not even really romantic or sexual. But a immediate source of attention and validation I could tap any moment I started feeling worthless or ugly.

From there, we'd start chatting out-of-character. I had a boyfriend (another Lifer, selected because he was a pushover and would feed my addiction), so they would be hesitant to reveal their feelings (they were mostly good dudes, awkward and naive), so I'd give little flirt nudges until they broke and admitted to adoring me. I didn't love them. I didn't even really like them romantically. I didn't like what I was doing, and I didn't think it was right. It felt wretched. I did it anyway, fully cognizant of the choice, though.

I'd lie about reciprocating their feelings (gotta keep them on the line). I'd do everything I could to make our interactions in-character as much as possible - that was way more fulfilling than real-life stuff. I had clever ways of ensuring it didn't go physical; out of eight or nine guys over the years, I only actually slept with one. To me, that's no saving grace and I'm not putting it here to prove I wasn't all bad, it's just a interesting piece of the evil.

After a while, there'd be less of a thrill. The hunt was over, and having the same person tell you how amazing you are day after day tends to rub the shine off the meaning. So I'd find a way to break it off. They'd leave the group, crippled. Or they'd stay and pine from afar. Some were solely through online RP sites, so I'd just go dark one day and that was that.

The last year it was going on, I knew things were getting worse. I weighed more than I ever had, I hand't worked in ages (boyfriend supported me), and the usual tricks weren't making me feel any better. I was running my troupe, the games were more intense than ever, but it was no good. I was sliding down into suicidal. All the bad from my past was crammed in a tiny box in my head (I'd never gone to therapy for the things that'd happened to me; I'd just pretended I was ok) and now that box was being crammed even more with the evil poo poo I was doing in the present. The hinges were straining and the lid was gonna blow.

My final 'conquest' was a guy ten years younger than me (he was legal) who had joined the group with his wife. They'd been married less than a year. He became so obsessed, he followed me places. He was also very, very bad at discretion. We got found out, first about the in-character cybering, then his wife found the out-of-character chats we'd done. She left him.

My boyfriend said he still wanted to be with me. He said he'd forgive me and we'd work it out. A couple days later, I went to the ER and told them I was going to hurt myself and to please help me. Total breakdown. I'd never done anything like that before. I was there, and then in a psychiatric facility briefly (same place they sent mentally ill inmates. It was a co-ed facility. That was fun). I really was at absolute rock-bottom. They were overcrowded, so I had to sleep on a pallet in the bathroom. I really can't remember a time I was so scared, hollowed out and done for. But I refused to be discharged until I spoke with a doctor. Did that, made him give me outpatient resources and my first anti-depressant prescription. My boyfriend picked me up and, on the way home, I told him I didn't want to be with him anymore. I said if he wanted to drop me off on the side of the road that I'd understand. He didn't. I started going to therapy, got the right balance of meds, and began to work my rear end off to stop being an evil human being. It sucked so bad, guys. I dunno why they show therapy as being this hour where you talk about your problems and the therapist nods and writes poo poo down. It was a full-on war waged in that room every week. We did guided meditation to bring me back to my past and make me face it and acknowledge it. We picked apart every inch of me to be looked at. There were weeks I'd actually psychically limp out of there. But I was pissed the gently caress off at my life being poo poo and feeling like I was poo poo, and so that anger helped to keep me going.

It's been almost a year. I've lost 40+ pounds, and still going, just by not being at the computer 12 hours a day, and being too poor to get takeout, heh. I'm working, we adopted two dogs, we live in a little blue house I love more than I ever did the big place that I rented so I could host games. The meds have made a huge difference - they're the rope that was thrown down into the pit; I had to climb out myself. For the first time since I can remember, I feel like I deserve to be on this earth. Not perfect, not awesome, but a right to exist here with everyone else. There's still stuff to do, still work ahead, but I know I won't ever be back in that place I was, and I will never be a cartoon villain again.

*cue the E.S. Posthumus cinema music*

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

Calico Heart posted:

This sounds cool as balls and now i think larping is cool.

Remedy this by sharing stories of the biggest LARP assholes/biggest dick moves y'all have ever come across

I need to assemble something for this one, so bear with me. Hopefully it'll be worth the wait.

TheAttackSlug
Aug 15, 2008

Ghogargi posted:

But a immediate source of attention and validation I could tap any moment I started feeling worthless or ugly.

If it's any consolation I've been in some combination of tabletop gaming group and/or convention-going circle of friends and/or MUD guild or whatever for the past ~20 years, and for most of that time couldn't swing a dead cat without hitting some girl that was doing this. I think most of them at least started with a genuine interest in the nerd games but got deeper and more insidiously into it once they realized that this was a place they could easily get more orbiters than the planet Jupiter. It's just a gold mine of guys who will become putty in the hands of a girl who doesn't ignore them. And the girls obviously get addicted to this above and independently of any other addiction they might have to gaming itself, which many do.

You're the first person I've ever heard admit it though, much less admit so starkly that you had to rotate your crop of thralls and discard the used husks. I don't think any of the few I still know now would ever admit it to themselves much less anyone else. Hearing it from a reformed ex-vampire has instantly motivated me to put up with it even less than I do already so thanks.

Tamarillo
Aug 6, 2009
When I was 16 my brand new boyfriend (23 :siren:) asked me if I wanted to go to his LARP evening (:siren:) and see if I liked it. I enjoyed playing the one D&D game I had played, and I didn't know what a LARP was, so I agreed to go along. The mutual friend we played D&D with found out and went "OH. Okay. Well, have fun, and I'll be interested in talking to you about it afterwards" with a grin (:siren:). It was held at a pokey old house which was a yoga centre during the day and apparently a WoD den every second Friday.

Anyway, things that happened:

- Upon entering the house, immediately accosted by a guy in makeup and a dumb hat who says he is the doorman and demands my cellphone number. He means my actual cellphone number and he 'needs it for the game'. We eventually get past him by saying "My character tells you her cellphone number" and walking away
- At 16 I was the youngest there by about 6 years at least and in hindsight it definitely was an R18 game. Lots of fat greasy guys and gals squeezed into ill-fitting clothing. I was also the most conventionally attractive female in the house (and 16) so got nothing but death stares from the girls and lots of unwanted attention from the boys. When I retreated to the OOC kitchen I had lots of tips to build my character with points in seduction or whatever.
- The "Prince of Hamilton" had made a 7 hour drive down to be at this pokey house for ??? He was a fat little dude with a neckbeard wearing a cape. He got very impatient with me and out of character he whined that he had almost NO HUMANITY LEFT and as a human I was NOT ACTING SCARED ENOUGH (of a fat little dude with a neckbeard wearing a cape) when he walked near me
- Standing around with a bunch of people talking at length about how important they were was very boring and especially difficult because every time one came up to inform me of their importance I was thinking "this is a socially maladjusted human being" - I just told my husband about this and the best way I can describe it is that the goal of every person there was to exposition everyone else in the room to death.
- Toward the end of the night someone asked me if I was a ghoul, I had no idea what that meant so I said I was a human, and they were like "sweet she's not taken by anyone!" and then next thing you know I'm paper-scissors-rocking and informed I'm this guys ghoul and I have to hang out with him. Apparently he's so old and strong that no human can resist him so I literally couldn't have 'won' the paper scissors rock. I call bullshit, they're like NO ITS THE RULES.

Suffice to say I didn't go back, and the friend laughed himself sick when I grumpily told him about how dumb it was. Boyfriend stopped going as well although the fact he went to that particular puddle of humanity with any regularity should have been a :siren:

Tamarillo fucked around with this message at 09:40 on Aug 25, 2015

Gravitas Shortfall
Jul 17, 2007

Utility is seven-eighths Proximity.


Tamarillo posted:

The "Prince of Hamilton" had made a 7 hour drive down to be at this pokey house for ??? He was a fat little dude with a neckbeard wearing a cape. He got very impatient with me and out of character he whined that he had almost NO HUMANITY LEFT and as a human I was NOT ACTING SCARED ENOUGH (of a fat little dude with a neckbeard wearing a cape) when he walked near me

Was this Hamilton, New Zealand? And if so, how long ago?

Because I might know some of these people. :smith:

Tamarillo
Aug 6, 2009

Gravitas Shortfall posted:

Was this Hamilton, New Zealand? And if so, how long ago?

Because I might know some of these people. :smith:

Yes, and 11 years ago.

Gravitas Shortfall
Jul 17, 2007

Utility is seven-eighths Proximity.


Tamarillo posted:

Yes, and 11 years ago.

I was well out of it by then. Used to do WoD LARP back in the late 90s/early 2000s with a group of people that were at least self aware enough to realise it was all a bit silly, and secure enough to keep away any creeps.

There is nothing more ridiculous than the idea that Hamilton of all loving places could be run by a sinister cabal of the undead.

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

Don't you tell me my business again.

Ghogargi posted:

Did that, made him give me outpatient resources and my first anti-depressant prescription. My boyfriend picked me up and, on the way home, I told him I didn't want to be with him anymore. I said if he wanted to drop me off on the side of the road that I'd understand. He didn't. I started going to therapy, got the right balance of meds, and began to work my rear end off to stop being an evil human being. It sucked so bad, guys. I dunno why they show therapy as being this hour where you talk about your problems and the therapist nods and writes poo poo down. It was a full-on war waged in that room every week.

Thanks for the response. If you don't mind, what did they prescribe? I've had bad luck with anti-depressant meds until very recently (mirtazapine).

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.

Tamarillo posted:

he had almost NO HUMANITY LEFT and as a human I was NOT ACTING SCARED ENOUGH

Tamarillo posted:

Toward the end of the night someone asked me if I was a ghoul, I had no idea what that meant so I said I was a human, and they were like "sweet she's not taken by anyone!" and then next thing you know I'm paper-scissors-rocking and informed I'm this guys ghoul and I have to hang out with him. Apparently he's so old and strong that no human can resist him so I literally couldn't have 'won' the paper scissors rock. I call bullshit, they're like NO ITS THE RULES.

Wow. So they didn't explain poo poo to you. Barely wrote you up a character sheet and thrust you into the middle of all of this without explaining major game mechanics politely? Your boyfriend is a total dick. First off, the no humanity thing is a total game mechanic; if he's low on humanity he's less Edward from Twilight and more Orlock from Nosferatu. Mechanically, within the game, he should have frightened you. Also, about the not being able to win RPS. Basically if the guy is old enough and goes back enough generations he gets enough retests that he'll eventually beat you. Even if you had retests to try and resist. It's a bullshit mechanic. There is a reason they stopped using it in New WoD.

I can say this, if this poo poo happened at a Cam game in the States there would be disciplinary actions. The creep factor would have remained, but not explaining major game mechanics and letting a player come in as a human and attempting to garner OOC information from a person through IC tactics and doing things aggressively to a new player who has no idea the mechanics? Suspensions at the very least, desanctioning of characters most likely, and banned from events a possibility. All of those are major no-nos.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

Tamarillo posted:

When I was 16 my brand new boyfriend (23 :siren:) asked me if I wanted to go to his LARP evening (:siren:) and see if I liked it. I enjoyed playing the one D&D game I had played, and I didn't know what a LARP was, so I agreed to go along. The mutual friend we played D&D with found out and went "OH. Okay. Well, have fun, and I'll be interested in talking to you about it afterwards" with a grin (:siren:). It was held at a pokey old house which was a yoga centre during the day and apparently a WoD den every second Friday.

Anyway, things that happened:

- Upon entering the house, immediately accosted by a guy in makeup and a dumb hat who says he is the doorman and demands my cellphone number. He means my actual cellphone number and he 'needs it for the game'. We eventually get past him by saying "My character tells you her cellphone number" and walking away
- At 16 I was the youngest there by about 6 years at least and in hindsight it definitely was an R18 game. Lots of fat greasy guys and gals squeezed into ill-fitting clothing. I was also the most conventionally attractive female in the house (and 16) so got nothing but death stares from the girls and lots of unwanted attention from the boys. When I retreated to the OOC kitchen I had lots of tips to build my character with points in seduction or whatever.
- The "Prince of Hamilton" had made a 7 hour drive down to be at this pokey house for ??? He was a fat little dude with a neckbeard wearing a cape. He got very impatient with me and out of character he whined that he had almost NO HUMANITY LEFT and as a human I was NOT ACTING SCARED ENOUGH (of a fat little dude with a neckbeard wearing a cape) when he walked near me
- Standing around with a bunch of people talking at length about how important they were was very boring and especially difficult because every time one came up to inform me of their importance I was thinking "this is a socially maladjusted human being" - I just told my husband about this and the best way I can describe it is that the goal of every person there was to exposition everyone else in the room to death.
- Toward the end of the night someone asked me if I was a ghoul, I had no idea what that meant so I said I was a human, and they were like "sweet she's not taken by anyone!" and then next thing you know I'm paper-scissors-rocking and informed I'm this guys ghoul and I have to hang out with him. Apparently he's so old and strong that no human can resist him so I literally couldn't have 'won' the paper scissors rock. I call bullshit, they're like NO ITS THE RULES.

Suffice to say I didn't go back, and the friend laughed himself sick when I grumpily told him about how dumb it was. Boyfriend stopped going as well although the fact he went to that particular puddle of humanity with any regularity should have been a :siren:


Skunkrocker posted:

Wow. So they didn't explain poo poo to you. Barely wrote you up a character sheet and thrust you into the middle of all of this without explaining major game mechanics politely? Your boyfriend is a total dick. First off, the no humanity thing is a total game mechanic; if he's low on humanity he's less Edward from Twilight and more Orlock from Nosferatu. Mechanically, within the game, he should have frightened you. Also, about the not being able to win RPS. Basically if the guy is old enough and goes back enough generations he gets enough retests that he'll eventually beat you. Even if you had retests to try and resist. It's a bullshit mechanic. There is a reason they stopped using it in New WoD.

I can say this, if this poo poo happened at a Cam game in the States there would be disciplinary actions. The creep factor would have remained, but not explaining major game mechanics and letting a player come in as a human and attempting to garner OOC information from a person through IC tactics and doing things aggressively to a new player who has no idea the mechanics? Suspensions at the very least, desanctioning of characters most likely, and banned from events a possibility. All of those are major no-nos.

I think you must have lucked out a lot with your games, because I was in the Cam in the States for four years and this is, almost blow-by-blow, what happened at games on every level, local to regional games of the month, to the big global conventions. And her account is so like my first experience playing Vamp in the Cam. The only difference was I liked the attention and making the chicks pissy.

I've never seen someone desanctioned, suspended or banned for anything less than an actual illegal offense. I saw it happen twice - child porn dude (who was in jail anyway) and date rape dude (6 month suspension and then he was back in the game free and clear).

Here's the deal with the disciplinary process in the Cam: let's say you're at game and some guy comes up and gropes your tits. Physically does it, but it's his character doing it to yours. That is considered a Severe Offense (unwanted physical contact of a sexual nature at a Camarilla event). It's the same level of offense, by the way, as putting an extra 26 points on your character sheet, or forging an experience point log. They consider those equally horrible. You would go immediately to your game's Coordinator (they're the officers in the club that handle out-of-character stuff), and tell them what happened. According to the membership handbook, the coordinator CAN immediately evict the player from the game. Doesn't have to. So, if the guy who groped you is, say, a officer of higher rank like a Regional Storyteller, it's gonna cause a huge shitstorm if you boot them from your game. So, once again, Lifers who are high-ranking can abuse their standing with some confidence. But let's say you have an awesome coordinator who don't take no poo poo, and they boot Tit-Groper from the game. That just means he can't come back that night. Just that night. He can show up next game no problemo.

Continuing on the non-corrupt line of thought (and it's being very, very generous to say no one's corrupt in this situation), you can lodge a formal complaint against Tit Groper in hopes of him being disciplined. The coordinator then has to go to the dude who groped and say you'd made a complaint. He's allowed to defend himself before any disciplinary action is taken. If you're not willing to just let him apologize and be let off the hook, you can ask for mediation, which means you two sit down with a coordinator and hash it out. If you aren't willing to sit with the guy who sexually molested you, you can ask for an investigation to be started for the purpose of determining what the disciplinary action will be.

Here's where it gets super fucky. The handbook says 'Coordinators and storytellers may enact disciplinary action within the scope and limits of their offices.' For a local coordinator or storyteller, that ain't much. They cannot desanction characters, suspend players or take away their member ranking. That can only be done by the higher-ups: regional, national and global officers. Since those guys weren't at the game and have no idea what's going on, statements have to be written and sent by everyone involved, including any witnesses, and then the statements have to be reviewed by the higher-ups and a disciplinary action handed down. Takes a while, trust me. He can keep coming to game scott-free during that time.

If the groper is best buddies with the higher-up handling the complaint, you're gonna be out of luck, kiddo. There is no Internal Affairs department in the Camarilla. I've seen this situation so many times.

Suggested actions for a severe offence:
• Permanent desanctioning of all that member’s characters
• Up to a three-month suspension
• Removal of up to 1500 prestige points

No. Please. Anything but that.

So people who you've never even met before get to decide the level of advocacy you receive. Three months at most, and the guy who groped you is back in action. Or he has his characters taken away, or his member level dropped. Which I'm sure matters a whole lot to you when he's still allowed to come to game and you have to be around him or quit playing yourself.

But wait! That'd be too easy. Your groper buddy can also appeal any disciplinary action he receives. The appeals process is long, full of red-tape, and requires the next level of higher-ups to deal with it. That means if it happened at your local game, it goes past the Regional officers and to the Arbitration Board, which are national officers. What usually happened when I was playing was the offender would state his or her intention to appeal even before the disciplinary action was handed down. So, he or she could continue to play while the statements are written and reviewed, the action is decided, the appeal is sent to the Board, and they decided whether or not to grant it.

There was a running joke in my group about one of our players who had filed a complaint and the accused had appealed it, and it had been four YEARS without a resolution, and the person he made the complaint against not only could continue to play, but ended up holding a regional officer's position. He was still waiting when I left.

And all this doesn't even touch Formal Hearings, which can require people who live in different states to have to come together and determine what happens. Which means it's usually done online via chat or e-mail and, to me, that is a staggeringly flawed medium to decide something like sexual harassment.

It's a bad system, and it's made worse by power-tripping assholes who can manipulate it to ensure they're never held accountable for what they do. I talked earlier about the guy who basically used my ignorance of the system as a new player to be ultra-creepy and intimidating, and how it was years before I knew I had the right to say 'no'. That's a prevalent situation. Unless the coordinator or storyteller happens to overhear the exchange, or the person who brought you is upstanding and watching your back all night (if you didn't come alone), there's no way you'd know what to do or how to get help. If you're a girl with low self-esteem, desperate to fit in and to be accepted, you aren't going to start complaining your first night.

Here's the member handbook for those who wanna check it out: http://www.mindseyesociety.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/handbook.12.2.03.bookmark1.pdf

Sorry. I went a bit ranty on this one. I just wanted to share my experiences with complaints and offenses over the years as I played.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

BiggerBoat posted:

Thanks for the response. If you don't mind, what did they prescribe? I've had bad luck with anti-depressant meds until very recently (mirtazapine).

I'm on Celexa (20mg) and Wellbutrin XL (300mg) for my anxiety/depression and Strattera (40mg) for ADHD. I've just begun to plateau, so I may end up increasing my dosage on the anti-depressants, since I'm nowhere near the max. I went off the Strattera for a while, then went back on it. I still don't know how I feel about it. It does help me focus and slow down, but it also seems to inhibit the antidepressants.

mlmp08
Jul 11, 2004

Prepare for my priapic projectile's exalted penetration
Nap Ghost
I'm lolling at the idea of using vampire LARP investigation preceding a to just file a civil suit or go to the cops.

"Your honor this lawsuit is frivolous I already lost prestige points!"

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.

Ghogargi posted:

Sorry. I went a bit ranty on this one. I just wanted to share my experiences with complaints and offenses over the years as I played.

No, it's okay! Seriously, I didn't know poo poo like that was going on. Our games were awesome by comparison and I hate saying that. :smith:

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

TheAttackSlug posted:

If it's any consolation I've been in some combination of tabletop gaming group and/or convention-going circle of friends and/or MUD guild or whatever for the past ~20 years, and for most of that time couldn't swing a dead cat without hitting some girl that was doing this. I think most of them at least started with a genuine interest in the nerd games but got deeper and more insidiously into it once they realized that this was a place they could easily get more orbiters than the planet Jupiter. It's just a gold mine of guys who will become putty in the hands of a girl who doesn't ignore them. And the girls obviously get addicted to this above and independently of any other addiction they might have to gaming itself, which many do.

You're the first person I've ever heard admit it though, much less admit so starkly that you had to rotate your crop of thralls and discard the used husks. I don't think any of the few I still know now would ever admit it to themselves much less anyone else. Hearing it from a reformed ex-vampire has instantly motivated me to put up with it even less than I do already so thanks.

There's a rather vicious trend that goes on both online and in gaming circles, where girls are castigated for wanting attention. I hate the phrase 'attention whore'. Hate it. It screws girls up so badly. We all want attention. We all want to be seen and heard and interacted with. The problem is, girls are rarely encouraged to own that desire and to make it something positive without resorting to sexuality. It took me a long, long time to figure out what was going on with me in that regard. I do game streaming, and I'm well familiar with the girl streamers with the cleavage and the flattering web-cam angle and the constant furious insistence that they aren't just there for attention or to break little gamer boys' hearts. That common scenario is so common because that's the only situation they're permitted - the guys will pay attention to them if they're hyper-sexualized, and they exonerate the heinous offense of 'attention whoring' by declaring they're not doing it. And the dance goes on and everyone's supposedly happy.

I've been streaming for five years, and it was only three months ago I finally set up a web cam. It was very hard to do. I had created a persona of flirty seductiveness. I didn't use a cam, because I wanted the viewers to imagine me as whatever they wanted, whatever was the most attractive or beguiling. I also thought I was ugly as balls. But continuing to work hard to be well meant I had to adjust the way I did things. It's not wrong for me to want attention, or even want praise and admiration. But it really didn't make me feel good to get it solely because of sexuality and an act. So, I got the webcam, I did my makeup fully admitting I still have some issues with self-image/acceptance, but I didn't dress provocatively and I stopped being flirty. I made a conscious rule to only be myself. Not a single lie or performance. Sometimes that did mean referencing something sexual, but it also meant being happy to broadcast, excited to hang out with the viewers, and offer them the parts of me that were real, for good or bad. If they didn't think I was hot and didn't want to tune in because of it, they weren't good for me anyway.

They know I like attention. We joke about it. And I'm coming to learn how awesome it feels to have people like me for me, which is so loving cliched I can't believe I typed that. To talk about books and movies and games and read them excerpts from my high school journals and have them good-naturedly tease me about how awful they are, but also not deliberately locking away sexual stuff (my husband said sometimes when we do it my body looks like a penis to him). It feels very good, and much more fulfilling, to ask honestly for attention that comes from companionship and an interest in who I am.

I know I'm rehashing this, but those LARP girls are making bad choices to fulfill a good need. It won't work. It won't last. But instead of calling them out, maybe let them know you think it's a shame you aren't able to experience the non-sexual, honest them. Losing the distraction of cleavage and the clamoring din of Nerd Queenism would allow them to have healthy attention, and it'd do wonders. I'll say it now - prolly won't work. Wouldn't've for me back in the day. It would have hurt me, because I'd think the guy didn't find me attractive and that was all that mattered then. But you can walk away knowing you didn't make things worse by either fawning over them or lambasting them for being fake sluts.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

Skunkrocker posted:

No, it's okay! Seriously, I didn't know poo poo like that was going on. Our games were awesome by comparison and I hate saying that. :smith:

I head heard legends of these awesome games, played in distant states.

Actually, what I heard was that there were games that had the Storytellers and Coordinators ignore all the crappy poo poo in the club and run their games as they thought best, under the radar. And it worked, allegedly. And I was so, so jealous.

dogcrash truther
Nov 2, 2013

Ghogargi posted:

(my husband said sometimes when we do it my body looks like a penis to him).

What...what does this mean?

mlmp08
Jul 11, 2004

Prepare for my priapic projectile's exalted penetration
Nap Ghost

dogcrash truther posted:

What...what does this mean?

It means I still can't tell if this thread is performance art.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

dogcrash truther posted:

What...what does this mean?

It means I made the wrong choice for spousage.

As he explains it, my back looks like the shaft and the curve of my hips and butt look like the head and my crack looks like the urethra slit.

I have never felt so attractive.

(He just chortled and muttered 'Your body looks like a weiner')

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

Don't you tell me my business again.
I just still can't wrap my head around this LARP thing. However, I do get the appeal of escapism and wanting to be something you're not (powerful, charismatic, rich) but the logistics seem impossible (although that haunted house thing someone did sounded rather cool). There's no real believable medieval, Middle Earth or Greyhawk in which to explore.

I would feel ridiculous. I remember thinking it'd be fun when I was 14 or 15 and wanting to move the excitement and fun of what was then AD&D First Edition into a "real thing", but what few times we tried it, it was incredibly lame. I mean, there was no way to avoid suspension of disbelief when you have air conditioner units going on and off, the phone ringing, kids riding by on bicycles, your mom calling you to dinner, the chimes of the ice cream man or a fire engine wailing in the background, a plane flying overhead, some guy munching on his Chicken McNuggets in game and drinking Mountain Dew etc.

I can't begin to imagine how text message alarms and cell phone calls ruin the experience in the same way, but beyond that, I can't imagine anyone over the age of 21 even beginning to bother with it. Seems like too much work for so little payoff, but I suppose you could say the same thing about drugs and alcohol, so I'm not passing judgement so much as I am trying to understand.

Always seemed to me, they HAVE a day for this sort of stuff and it's called "Halloween", which is my favorite holiday. I'd say the whole thing just feels like an extended version of this one day but I'm not sure that's quite right since it seems to go beyond "dressing up and looking awesome" so maybe that's not the best analogy.

It's odd that you say that community theater or an improv group would subject you to fears of rejection and social anxiety since, from what you've written, that was exactly what happened to you in this pretend world you guys set up and the social hierarchy that evolved from it . Seems to me you guys could have collectively written a play and hashed out your "who's the star" arguments by who did the best writing, not who had been playing the longest.

TL/DR: Questions if you don't mind:

- Now that you've gotten out, and since you seem to have an interest in acting, have you considered looking into local theater as a new outlet? Or even writing a book about your experiences?

- Anyone ever break into your game and gently caress with you guys or aggressively make fun of you? People and families walking through the same park or campground or drunk frat bros making fun of nerds and loving up your game?

- Anyone ever get physically hurt in the play fights? Or hurt themselves? Threaten to? Like, "my character is going to attempt suicide" sort of thing?

- I know you mentioned sex, but how common was drug usage and drinking? Did people load up on wine and rationalize it by saying it was blood or that they were in character?

- For the people with kids, what did they do with them? Hire sitters or just leave them in a tent and go play make believe? Did anyone ever involve their kids in the game and say "this is Alucard! My spawn! son of WhatevertheFuck and make he or she into a character? At what age(s)? Did the kids like it?

I have more but I'll stop there.

Rurutia
Jun 11, 2009

Ghogargi posted:

There's a rather vicious trend that goes on both online and in gaming circles, where girls are castigated for wanting attention. I hate the phrase 'attention whore'. Hate it. It screws girls up so badly. We all want attention. We all want to be seen and heard and interacted with. The problem is, girls are rarely encouraged to own that desire and to make it something positive without resorting to sexuality. It took me a long, long time to figure out what was going on with me in that regard. I do game streaming, and I'm well familiar with the girl streamers with the cleavage and the flattering web-cam angle and the constant furious insistence that they aren't just there for attention or to break little gamer boys' hearts. That common scenario is so common because that's the only situation they're permitted - the guys will pay attention to them if they're hyper-sexualized, and they exonerate the heinous offense of 'attention whoring' by declaring they're not doing it. And the dance goes on and everyone's supposedly happy.

I've been streaming for five years, and it was only three months ago I finally set up a web cam. It was very hard to do. I had created a persona of flirty seductiveness. I didn't use a cam, because I wanted the viewers to imagine me as whatever they wanted, whatever was the most attractive or beguiling. I also thought I was ugly as balls. But continuing to work hard to be well meant I had to adjust the way I did things. It's not wrong for me to want attention, or even want praise and admiration. But it really didn't make me feel good to get it solely because of sexuality and an act. So, I got the webcam, I did my makeup fully admitting I still have some issues with self-image/acceptance, but I didn't dress provocatively and I stopped being flirty. I made a conscious rule to only be myself. Not a single lie or performance. Sometimes that did mean referencing something sexual, but it also meant being happy to broadcast, excited to hang out with the viewers, and offer them the parts of me that were real, for good or bad. If they didn't think I was hot and didn't want to tune in because of it, they weren't good for me anyway.

They know I like attention. We joke about it. And I'm coming to learn how awesome it feels to have people like me for me, which is so loving cliched I can't believe I typed that. To talk about books and movies and games and read them excerpts from my high school journals and have them good-naturedly tease me about how awful they are, but also not deliberately locking away sexual stuff (my husband said sometimes when we do it my body looks like a penis to him). It feels very good, and much more fulfilling, to ask honestly for attention that comes from companionship and an interest in who I am.

I know I'm rehashing this, but those LARP girls are making bad choices to fulfill a good need. It won't work. It won't last. But instead of calling them out, maybe let them know you think it's a shame you aren't able to experience the non-sexual, honest them. Losing the distraction of cleavage and the clamoring din of Nerd Queenism would allow them to have healthy attention, and it'd do wonders. I'll say it now - prolly won't work. Wouldn't've for me back in the day. It would have hurt me, because I'd think the guy didn't find me attractive and that was all that mattered then. But you can walk away knowing you didn't make things worse by either fawning over them or lambasting them for being fake sluts.

This is an awesome post.

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

BiggerBoat posted:


TL/DR: Questions if you don't mind:

- Now that you've gotten out, and since you seem to have an interest in acting, have you considered looking into local theater as a new outlet? Or even writing a book about your experiences?

Theater - not really. I might in the future, but right now I'm focusing on filmmaking. My husband and I make weensy indie short films, and we're both hoping to build on that, since we both have film school backgrounds. I've been making movies since I was about seven.

Writing about my experiences is something I haven't considered, largely because I'm not sure if there's an audience for it. I do write all the time, and I have been published in literary magazines and self-published some stuff, but nothing more than that. My hope is that, with new health, I'll have the discipline and confidence to pursue film and writing more.

BiggerBoat posted:

- Anyone ever break into your game and gently caress with you guys or aggressively make fun of you? People and families walking through the same park or campground or drunk frat bros making fun of nerds and loving up your game?

Not that I remember. We had newbies come play and just not take it at all seriously and derail things, but I actually kinda loved those moments. My favorite was this dude who was just so unbelievably weird. He kept wanting to play a snake vampire, and even when told there were no such things in the new system, he would come to game wearing this latex cobra hood headpiece, completely ignore all rules, and walk around saying he was a snake vampire. Once he wasn't playing, but came riding on his bike up to the breezeway of the university where we were playing. He rolled right into the middle of the group during a scene and sat on his bike and chatted with me and my husband. Slayed us. We talked to him and just watched everyone around us getting more and more infuriated. He finally was booted after he came to game completely hammered three times.

Later we learned he had become infamous throughout all the different LARPs in the area, Cam and troupe alike, because he'd decided he was a real vampire and changed his name to Tiberius Rex. He was also really tiny, and wore platforms that he'd nailed a second set of platforms onto to give him, like, nine inches of extra height. Rumor had it that the double platforms had caused him to fall down the stairs at a local goth club, and he was subsequently kicked out because they thought he was completely smashed.

God, I miss that guy. He was amazing.

BiggerBoat posted:

- Anyone ever get physically hurt in the play fights? Or hurt themselves? Threaten to? Like, "my character is going to attempt suicide" sort of thing?

Not intentionally. My husband almost broke his foot when his character motorboated a vampire dude's belly, and he leapt away after. Physical injury was mitigated because combat was all done via cards or Rock/Paper/Scissors. Plus the fact that most players wanted to exert themselves physically as little as possible.

The rule was 'No Touching'. That was a pretty hard and fast rule, though it meant no touching without consent. I've been tied up at game, dragged about, shocked with a violet wand, but I consented and/or solicited those things willingly, 'cause I liked it.

BiggerBoat posted:

- I know you mentioned sex, but how common was drug usage and drinking? Did people load up on wine and rationalize it by saying it was blood or that they were in character?

Sometimes. The guy who pissed on my floor was on painkillers. Should not have been at game, but came anyway. I was always an advocate of people being allowed one or two drinks, especially new folks who might need it to relax. At the conventions, there was copious alcohol usage that led to many bad, sweaty and flabby-fleshed decisions.

BiggerBoat posted:

- For the people with kids, what did they do with them? Hire sitters or just leave them in a tent and go play make believe? Did anyone ever involve their kids in the game and say "this is Alucard! My spawn! son of WhatevertheFuck and make he or she into a character? At what age(s)? Did the kids like it?

This was another of my crusades. The Cam is an 18+ club. You have to be 18 to join/play, because the matieral is so adult. But people still brought their kids to games. They would park them somewhere nearby and then go play. The chick I mentioned earlier who brought her son to game and he sat on the ground and played with sticks and leaves all night - yeah. I fought HARD against kids at game. I felt really uncomfortable RPing a vampire and the narrations of violence or sex that happened within earshot of children. Eventually our local game banned kids, which cause a group of people to split off and make their own group. It was another side-effect of Lifer addiction - they'd never skip game, even if it meant their poor kid had to come and be ignored and stay up 'til 1AM and hear some guy talking about ripping spinal cords out of people's bodies.

lushka16
Apr 8, 2003

Doctor of Love
College Slice

bewbies posted:

Can someone provide photographic evidence of these overweight or emaciated women in sexy clothing pretending to be wizards or whatever this is?



How DARE you post anything other than this classic?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_ekugPKqFw

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

BiggerBoat posted:

I just still can't wrap my head around this LARP thing. However, I do get the appeal of escapism and wanting to be something you're not (powerful, charismatic, rich) but the logistics seem impossible (although that haunted house thing someone did sounded rather cool). There's no real believable medieval, Middle Earth or Greyhawk in which to explore.

I would feel ridiculous. I remember thinking it'd be fun when I was 14 or 15 and wanting to move the excitement and fun of what was then AD&D First Edition into a "real thing", but what few times we tried it, it was incredibly lame. I mean, there was no way to avoid suspension of disbelief when you have air conditioner units going on and off, the phone ringing, kids riding by on bicycles, your mom calling you to dinner, the chimes of the ice cream man or a fire engine wailing in the background, a plane flying overhead, some guy munching on his Chicken McNuggets in game and drinking Mountain Dew etc.

I can't begin to imagine how text message alarms and cell phone calls ruin the experience in the same way, but beyond that, I can't imagine anyone over the age of 21 even beginning to bother with it. Seems like too much work for so little payoff, but I suppose you could say the same thing about drugs and alcohol, so I'm not passing judgement so much as I am trying to understand.

Always seemed to me, they HAVE a day for this sort of stuff and it's called "Halloween", which is my favorite holiday. I'd say the whole thing just feels like an extended version of this one day but I'm not sure that's quite right since it seems to go beyond "dressing up and looking awesome" so maybe that's not the best analogy.

It's odd that you say that community theater or an improv group would subject you to fears of rejection and social anxiety since, from what you've written, that was exactly what happened to you in this pretend world you guys set up and the social hierarchy that evolved from it . Seems to me you guys could have collectively written a play and hashed out your "who's the star" arguments by who did the best writing, not who had been playing the longest.

Sorry, forgot to comment - the fact that you would feel ridiculous is exactly why LARP can only ensnare a certain type of person. It IS ridiculous. I had many moments of blinking and looking around and thinking 'It is Friday night and I am pretending to be a faerie/vampire/mage. What the gently caress.' But you can believe anything, and you can delude yourself to any degree if you need to.

It helped to LARP in a private home, to change out all the lights for red bulbs, to have music on. Props helped, decorations helped, and a storyteller who was really good at acting and describing scenes helped. These LARPs were often set in mansions or nightclubs, so you didn't really have to do much to create that sort of atmosphere. You felt like you were on a theater stage that had no audience. So it wasn't always hard to suspend disbelief.

lushka16
Apr 8, 2003

Doctor of Love
College Slice

Quit apologizing for stuff! Not sure if you're doing it because you're used to Reddit style responses (SA don't play that) or if it's a function of your personality, but we're all specifically here to read your thread so post whatever details at whatever length you desire :)

edit: This thread has become a little bit of a "oh I had fun LARPing like this"-fest. I do want to hear your particular stories, when you're ready.

lushka16 fucked around with this message at 19:52 on Aug 25, 2015

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

lushka16 posted:

Quit apologizing for stuff! Not sure if you're doing it because you're used to Reddit style responses (SA don't play that) or if it's a function of your personality, but we're all specifically here to read your thread so post whatever details at whatever length you desire :)

edit: This thread has become a little bit of a "oh I had fun LARPing like this"-fest. I do want to hear your particular stories, when you're ready.

It's a combination of being totally new and sorta egshell-stepping for safety's sake, previous experience with other forums, and being told the thread was going to be harshly treated when I asked for advice from the outside. I'll knock it off.

What stories would you like to hear? Rather, what things should I write about that'd be of interest to you?

Ghogargi
Aug 10, 2015

Rurutia posted:

This is an awesome post.

You are an awesome person. Thank you for this.

lushka16
Apr 8, 2003

Doctor of Love
College Slice

Ghogargi posted:

It's a combination of being totally new and sorta egshell-stepping for safety's sake, previous experience with other forums, and being told the thread was going to be harshly treated when I asked for advice from the outside. I'll knock it off.

What stories would you like to hear? Rather, what things should I write about that'd be of interest to you?

I'm an old man on this forum and I can safely say that you should feel free to post openly. I can't even imagine why someone would advise you against posting here - GBS may have changed but A/T is still generally open to hearing about unique experiences.

I feel like the tone of this thread has moved from how LARPing ruined your life to a discussion of the finer points of various LARPs. It's hard to say exactly what you should write, but I personally enjoy posts with an emotional voice e.g. what did you feel, what was your motivation, how were you affected etc. I like threads that tell a story chronologically one post or so at a time with intermingled questions answered. For me it's easier to understand your experience that way. Just one man's opinion, anyway. You're doing just fine.

e: I do have a question: Was your husband involved in LARPing?

lushka16 fucked around with this message at 20:54 on Aug 25, 2015

Strategic Tea
Sep 1, 2012

Obligatory :justpost:

If it's funny or horrible or really has any light to shed at all, it's interesting and good :)

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

Don't you tell me my business again.

lushka16 posted:

I'm an old man on this forum and I can safely say that you should feel free to post openly. I can't even imagine why someone would advise you against posting here - GBS may have changed but A/T is still generally open to hearing about unique experiences.

I feel like the tone of this thread has moved from how LARPing ruined your life to a discussion of the finer points of various LARPs. It's hard to say exactly what you should write, but I personally enjoy posts with an emotional voice e.g. what did you feel, what was your motivation, how were you affected etc. I like threads that tell a story chronologically one post or so at a time with intermingled questions answered. For me it's easier to understand your experience that way. Just one man's opinion, anyway. You're doing just fine.

e: I do have a question: Was your husband involved in LARPing?

Personally, I want to hear the hoor stories, but, yeah. I think the people should just post what they want. No one's gonna eat you alive in here I don't think.

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feedmegin
Jul 30, 2008

lushka16 posted:

e: I do have a question: Was your husband involved in LARPing?

From like 3 posts up -

'My husband almost broke his foot when his character motorboated a vampire dude's belly, '

:science:

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