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Rand McNally
May 20, 2007

Mexican Samurai posted:

So I downloaded the audio version of Daniel Bryan's book which is actually ready by Daniel Bryan himself.

I'm sure that you've read the last page already:

If you haven't.



Daniel Bryan cries quite heavily as he is reading it aloud. Goddamn. :smith:

Listening now. Whoever is reading those stupid chapter stories is hilarious in a bad way.

Oh god. Bryan. :cry:

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Lord Chumley
May 14, 2007

Embrace your destiny.

That DICK! posted:

In my betting pool we have something called the Kane Principle where you can get 5 points or lose 1 point for betting that Kane will interfere with a match. We also have the Kane Bonanza, where you can gain 1000 or lose 1 for predicting that Kane will interfere with all the matches

I thank you for inventing the phrase "Kane Bonanza", forums user That DICK!.

Grendels Dad
Mar 5, 2011

Popular culture has passed you by.

Marquis de Pyro posted:

The 15s will just get shipped off to Africa, to join all of the Buffalo Bills Superbowl Champ shirts in eternity

Additionally to making Make a Wish-contributions in the triple digits, Cena's merchandise is now clothing half of the third world. That man is truly a saint.

Feels Villeneuve
Oct 7, 2007

Setter is Better.
I don't think Cena will win 16 without a buildup that mentions him potentially tying Flair.

Charles Gnarwin
Jul 31, 2014

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...


Alain Post posted:

I don't think Cena will win 16 without a buildup that mentions him potentially tying Flair.

You're in luck! They threw out that Cena will probably break Flair's record (not tie) in an offhand comment during one of Orton's matches on Raw.

The build is done. Time for the payoff.

Muddy Burphy
Dec 4, 2010

The #RXT REVOLUTION has two words for ya..
SCOOP IT!

:frogc00l:

he knows...
Do people actually expect anything other than a gently caress finish to the Rollins/Cena match?

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


ed: ^^ ROH wasn't dumb enough to hype a champ vs champ winner take all match that resulted in nothing. WWE isn't either

Charles Gnarwin posted:

You're in luck! They threw out that Cena will probably break Flair's record (not tie) in an offhand comment during one of Orton's matches on Raw.

The build is done. Time for the payoff.

Plus they'll have all night of Summerslam to hype that up more if they want, it's not like Cena/Seth's main eventing

Chris James 2 fucked around with this message at 16:04 on Aug 13, 2015

Ever Disappointing
May 4, 2004

Muddy Burphy posted:

Do people actually expect anything other than a gently caress finish to the Rollins/Cena match?

Cena will win clean. 6 months from now Rollins will be vying for the Intercontinental Championship as a comedy jobber.

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

Muddy Burphy posted:

Do people actually expect anything other than a gently caress finish to the Rollins/Cena match?

Maybe? Summerslam and Mania have been the only show the title has changed hands(besides the emergency hotshot to Cena at MitB last year) on for like 3 years.

Blast Fantasto
Sep 18, 2007

USAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
They're going to hype Cena BREAKING Flair's record, not tying it. So after he wins at Summerslam and loses to a Sheamus cash-in, then he can chase the title with all of the "Greatest WWE Champ of All Time" hype in the air.

projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


Why would you assume the WWE is not dumb enough to do something. Have you seen their shows.

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007




Grimey Drawer
I still think Seth will be among the uppercard/top card guys more often than not for the rest of his career (because he's a former Shield guy and they clearly love Seth) but yeah Cena's winning clean.

EugeneJ
Feb 5, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Flair coming back as a heel manager trying to stop Cena from ever breaking his record would be very cool

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

I actually think Seth is winning still

Thauros
Jan 29, 2003

I really haven't been a fan of WWE's product in recent months, but I genuinely don't see a problem with Cena beating him for the title. They've done about all they can with a chickenshit heel champ reign by now.

My main problem with their booking of Cena is that I absolutely feel that he should've dropped the US to Owens to actually help build someone new instead of apparently copying what ROH is doing out of pettiness.

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

John should have dropped the title to Owens, yes. He should have dropped it at Summerslam, though, instead of burning through three PPV matches and three months of feud in 6 weeks. It's one of the drawbacks in having so much programming.

Niwrad
Jul 1, 2008

bradzilla posted:

Maybe? Summerslam and Mania have been the only show the title has changed hands(besides the emergency hotshot to Cena at MitB last year) on for like 3 years.

I sort of missed when the title could change hands at any time. Like any week you could turn in on Raw and see someone else win it.

sticklefifer
Nov 11, 2003

by VideoGames
I feel like with the broken nose thing they might pull a Brutus. Have Cena wrestle in a mask only to have Rollins rip the mask off and bust his face up again.


which Cena comes back from and wins clean anyway

Natural 20
Sep 17, 2007

Wearer of Compasses. Slayer of Gods. Champion of the Colosseum. Heart of the Void.
Saviour of Hallownest.
Cena will hit an AA, Seth will kick out. Seth will hit a Pedigree, Cena will kick out. Cena will put Seth in the STF, Seth won't tap and will get to the ropes. Seth will counter the next AA, go for an incredibly dangerous move, probably the moonsault, miss, get hit with an AA and lose.

Mark my words.

HerraS
Apr 15, 2012

Looking professional when committing genocide is essential. This is mostly achieved by using a beret.

Olive drab colour ensures the genocider will remain hidden from his prey until it's too late for them to do anything.



Where does KANE fit in all this?

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Cena will win, and then Sheamus will cash in

Which will mean the PPV will need a happy ending to counteract the swerve, which will mean Taker will pin Brock clean mid-ring

triplexpac
Mar 24, 2007

Suck it
Two tears in a bucket
And then another thing
I'm not the one they'll try their luck with
Hit hard like brass knuckles
See your face through the turnbuckle dude
I got no love for you

HerraS posted:

Where does KANE fit in all this?

He'll come back with his Mask randomly, and get yet another main event push because NOW HE MEANS BUSINESS

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Chris James 2 posted:

ed: ^^ ROH wasn't dumb enough to hype a champ vs champ winner take all match that resulted in nothing. WWE isn't either

The difference is that Summerslam is going to end with Brock/Taker dream grudge match, so they could do a gently caress finish in the world title match and people will still be happy.

There's a chance of a clean finish if they run the Amell match before the title match, because I think that's the only other match on the card that could be the semi main. Typical death slot between the real semi main and main and all.

triplexpac
Mar 24, 2007

Suck it
Two tears in a bucket
And then another thing
I'm not the one they'll try their luck with
Hit hard like brass knuckles
See your face through the turnbuckle dude
I got no love for you

ayn rand hand job posted:

The difference is that Summerslam is going to end with Brock/Taker dream grudge match, so they could do a gently caress finish in the world title match and people will still be happy.

There's a chance of a clean finish if they run the Amell match before the title match, because I think that's the only other match on the card that could be the semi main. Typical death slot between the real semi main and main and all.

They'll "give divas a chance" to be in the semi main death slot like always

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


triplexpac posted:

They'll "give divas a chance" to be in the semi main death slot like always

There's gonna be 8 eliminations in that match, no way a piss break lasts 8 eliminations unless your bladder is just a timebomb

Ty1990
Apr 22, 2011

Apologize if it's been mentioned already but Taker is a sizeable -350 favorite to beat Brock lol

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

Ty1990 posted:

Apologize if it's been mentioned already but Taker is a sizeable -350 favorite to beat Brock lol

That doesn't mean poo poo until about an hour before the show

Abrasive Obelisk
May 2, 2013

I joined th
ROVPACK IN THE HOOUUUUSE!
:vince:
he still knows...

Ty1990 posted:

Apologize if it's been mentioned already but Taker is a sizeable -350 favorite to beat Brock lol

Odds don't matter unless it's right before the event and you see 1000+.

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

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Ty1990 posted:

Apologize if it's been mentioned already but Taker is a sizeable -350 favorite to beat Brock lol

Never tell me the odds.

DEAR RICHARD
Feb 5, 2009

IT'S TIME FOR MY TOOLS

Ty1990 posted:

Apologize if it's been mentioned already but Taker is a sizeable -350 favorite to beat Brock lol

Cena will overcome these odds

primaltrash
Feb 11, 2008

(Thought-ful Croak)

DEAR RICHARD posted:

Cena will overcome these odds

Cena cashes in the MITB to have the honor of beating Brock Lesnar and the Undertaker in the same match at Summerslam.

Shawn Cotureier
Jan 21, 2009

Still better than Umberger

Chris James 2 posted:

There's gonna be 8 eliminations in that match, no way a piss break lasts 8 eliminations unless your bladder is just a timebomb

I think the eliminations are as a team, so there would only be 2.

achillesforever6
Apr 23, 2012

psst you wanna do a communism?
Another rumor is that the Cena and Rollins match will end in a way that allows Cena and Rollins to retain

Which means of course its going to end in a DQ/countout/no contest to continue this feud for the next 2 months

Wise Fwom Yo Gwave
Jan 9, 2006

Popping up from out of nowhere...


I would love to see Sting go up against The Demon Kane with blowtorch shield just for the <.5% chance we could see a double-mask-off.

Jolo
Jun 4, 2007

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

HerraS posted:

Where does KANE fit in all this?

Obviously Cena is going to come out wearing the Kane mask. He's going to interfere in the Taker/Lesnar match to get Undertaker the win. If I was creating his entrance, it would start with the heavy organ of Kane's music, then flames would shoot up and it would shift into the "BrrrrrrrrrRRRRRR" from Cena's intro. Then it would be Cena's music played with the organ.

triplexpac
Mar 24, 2007

Suck it
Two tears in a bucket
And then another thing
I'm not the one they'll try their luck with
Hit hard like brass knuckles
See your face through the turnbuckle dude
I got no love for you
Cena and Seth will pin each other at the same time and trade titles

Saint Freak
Apr 16, 2007

Regretting is an insult to oneself
Buglord
KANE is hiding under the ring during the Cena match wearing his mask and then wearing ANOTHER John Cena mask over his mask! At the right moment he knocks Cena out, hides the body, and lets Rollins pin him confusing the referee with reverse double anti-twin magic.

Afterwards the camera shows him removing the John Cena mask to reveal his mask so the audience is not confused. And then shows him removing his mask so the audience is not confused. Narrated by Michael Cole to alleviate any confusion.

TransatlanticFoe
Mar 1, 2003

Hell Gem
If Sheamus cashes in mid-match, does he win both titles?

Tripwyre
Mar 25, 2007

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000

:ughh:

future scoopin'...

CapnAndy posted:

I'm watching Raw now before I go to sleep and I just saw an arena full of people pop their loving heads off for Brie Bella, I feel like I'm taking crazy pills

I was at Raw this week and could not comprehend why they put the only Diva's team of actual faces on commentary. The crowd wanted to be into the match but didn't really know how to support it. Team B.A.D. are obvious heels though Sasha is so good no one wants to boo her, so she got chants. Team Bella is an absolute mess of alignment. Alicia Fox is seemingly a heel for siding with the Bellas against Paige pre-NXT call-ups, but really no one can care enough about her for her to be anything other than neutral. Nikki is definitely a heel, and Brie is a natural face. So you have three women representing every possible alignment all on one team. How are we supposed to react to that? It makes no sense.

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Tato
Jun 19, 2001

DIRECTIVE 236: Promote pro-social values
Sheamus has to lose his cash in. Good lord, the man has less heat now than ever (and that's really saying something given how awful his Smackdown reign is). You might as well put the title on loving Adam Rose or Wade Barrett if you're insane enough to put it on Sheamus.

I think the only opponent he could get heat against is a returning Daniel Bryan given their history, but once Sheamus kills DB again in their first match you'll be stuck with nothing.

I just want a dominant face champ for a while and if it has to be Cena, so be it. I cannot handle any more evil authority figures in power propping up a coward loser champion. Jesus Christ this type of angle is so, so, so tired. Now I hate Rollins because of it and Rollins is great!

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