I'll just have the side salad - The Something Awful Forums

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The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > I'll just have the side salad

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Vorik: Mar 27, 2014

mysterious frankie posted:

nah, I don't really feel like pizza. you go ahead though. I'll just have the side salad.

what, no? this place is fine. I'm just not too hungry. I just want the side salad.

listen, it's not a big deal. people have side salads all of the time.

I don't want bruschetta. it is not basically a side salad, no matter how you try and rationalize it. it's too heavy. I just want a side salad.

with a raspberry vinaigrette on the si- stop interrupting me, I'm talking to the waitress- that's right, raspberry vinaigrette. thank you.

stop sulking, it's just a side salad.

oh no you are not getting me to eat some of your pizza. I don't want pizza. I'm going to a brazilian place for dinner tonight and I don't want to get too full.

ok, we'll just stop talking then. we'll eat in silence. I'll have my side salad and you'll have your pizza in silence. what a fun lunch. I'm glad we left the office for this.

my side salad came first, but I won't eat it. no, I won't eat it. we'll eat at the same time.

I said we'll eat at the same time. stop being a jerk. I can wait.

put down the knife! jesus christ, what's wrong with you?

ok, whatever you say. I'm eating the side salad. just don't do anything rash.

imf eebing the sibf sawaf

ok, I'm finished... listen, bud, is everything ok? what you did is insane. everyone is looking; i think they're calling the cops.

uh, they did. the cops are here; don't do anything crazy... no don't run, put down the knife!

oh god, they shot him.

whose going to pay for this lunch now?

listen, waitress, my buddy said he was going to get lunch & I left my wallet in the car. could you just fish his wallet out of his back pocket and... no? well I think you're a ghoul too, how does it feel?

great, now I'm washing dishes to pay off my debt. this is nonsense.

it wasn't even a very good side salad.

imagine being autistic enough to type up a post like this

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:11

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 26, 2024 01:59

deadly_pudding: May 13, 2009; who the fuck is scraeming
"LOG OFF" at my house.
show yourself, coward.
i will never log off

I'm the open-air bucket of raspberry vinaigrette that's like 20% fruit flies by volume by the end of the lunch rush

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:12

dad gay. so what: Feb 18, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

peee-u this thread stinks to high heaven

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:15

JiveHonky: May 12, 2001; by zen death robot; Grimey Drawer

what u do is u put the cheese, then 1 lettuce, then cheese, then blu cheese. garnish with the cheese dressing of your choice.

cheese

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:17

dad gay. so what: Feb 18, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

Vorik posted:

imagine being autistic enough to type up a post like this

Yeah e should hav e stopped after "glad we left the office for this" but he must have sperged out big time after that I guess

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:18

mysterious frankie: Jan 11, 2009; This displeases Dev- ..van. Shut up.

it's actually duck tales fan fiction. all the characters are duck tales ducks. they soothe me.

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:22

dad gay. so what: Feb 18, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

mysterious frankie posted:

it's actually duck tales fan fiction. all the characters are duck tales ducks. they soothe me.

more like "fuckn fails" :rolleyes:

:rolleyes:

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:23

Hobohemian: Sep 30, 2005; by XyloJW

Ponzu is a pretty good salad dressing with low calories.

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:23

mysterious frankie: Jan 11, 2009; This displeases Dev- ..van. Shut up.

dad gay. so what posted:

more like "fuckn fails"

no, duck tales. the name is duck tales.

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:24

basement jihadist: Oct 3, 2002

Geoff Zahn posted:

Welcome to the wonderful world of mirrors, bitch

no way i dont believe it

# ? Aug 21, 2015 21:25

clopping and cumming: Jun 24, 2005

Geoff Zahn posted:

Welcome to the wonderful world of mirrors, bitch

:boom:

# ? Aug 22, 2015 03:59

thathonkey: Jul 17, 2012

Parallax Scroll posted:

i read the op

me too and wish i hadnt. voted 1.

# ? Aug 22, 2015 04:02

Fargin Icehole: Feb 19, 2011; Pet me.

dad gay. so what posted:

peee-u this thread stinks to high heaven

must be all that broccoli.

# ? Aug 22, 2015 04:06

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

Fargin Icehole posted:

must be all that asparagus.

# ? Aug 22, 2015 04:10

satanic splash-back: Jan 28, 2009

All this talk about side salads and not one mention of what side it's on!?

# ? Aug 22, 2015 04:31

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 01:59

TwoFire: Sep 11, 2001; by Ralp

satanic splash-back posted:

All this talk about side salads and not one mention of what side it's on!?

the downside its hidden somewhere under the pizza

# ? Aug 22, 2015 04:35

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > I'll just have the side salad

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