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SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


1. That God exists and he cares about their lovely lives.

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coldplay chiptunes
Sep 17, 2010

by Lowtax
Okay...

Ramsus
Sep 14, 2002

by Hand Knit
pretty depressing thread man

symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

2. they're good people

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec

SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

1. That God exists and he cares about their lovely lives.

This is true, by the way

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


Hector Beerlioz posted:

This is true, by the way

I know it's truly what Christians believe.

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005
Think the end times will happen in their lifetime

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005
think the bible was written by god, and not men

Iseeyouseemeseeyou
Jan 3, 2011
door2door will increase number of believers

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
4. vampires drink ipas

4b. vampires watch hockey on television

kuddles
Jul 16, 2006

Like a fist wrapped in blood...
That eternal damnation isn't worth the tradeoff for the intensely satisfying experience of sodomy.

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
6. judas priest is better than iron maiden

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
12. cats make good friend substitutes

symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

Gatekeeper posted:

6. judas priest is better than iron maiden
crucify them all

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
23. have-a-heart traps are for fags, get a real mousetrap that kills the fuckin vermin, if your kids think its mean you should hit them until they stop being pussies

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Gatekeeper posted:

23. have-a-heart traps are for fags, get a real mousetrap that kills the fuckin vermin, if your kids think its mean you should hit them until they stop being pussies

this obviously is wrong, saving the life of a cool lil mouse is extremely awesome and is actually what god wants from us

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
idk op have you met jesus before

he seems alright

Moola
Aug 16, 2006

Hector Beerlioz posted:

This is true, by the way

nah

Kanthulhu
Apr 8, 2009
NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!


(Dany shits in a field)
That the stories in the Bible are special and inspired by god instead of simply being one more mythology among many others that existed in that area.

Kanthulhu
Apr 8, 2009
NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!


(Dany shits in a field)

Snatch Duster posted:

idk op have you met jesus before

he seems alright

I've never met Jesus. Neither has any of the authors that wrote the books in the bible.

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec

Yeah, it is

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Kanthulhu posted:

I've never met Jesus. Neither has any of the authors that wrote the books in the bible.

they met him in heaven bruh

whoflungpoop
Sep 9, 2004

With you and the constellations
in their moses fanfic they copy/pasted sargon's origin story and changed the name

Moola
Aug 16, 2006

nope lol

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec

Moola posted:

nope lol

Praying for you, goonfriend

Kanthulhu
Apr 8, 2009
NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!


(Dany shits in a field)

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Praying for you, goonfriend

Christians believe praying does anything at all.

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
dont bother god not real, so what?

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
in old gibs everyone was atheist and it feels like new gibs theres lots of rage against atheists cause of this

furthermore faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart gently caress my assssssssssssssssssssssssss

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec

Kanthulhu posted:

Christians believe praying does anything at all.

Now I have your soul to pray for as well. The list keeps getting longer and longer...:sigh:

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Moola posted:

in old gibs everyone was atheist and it feels like new gibs theres lots of rage against atheists cause of this

furthermore faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart gently caress my assssssssssssssssssssssssss

atheism is bunk

dick dorkins ruined it and its not cool any more

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
307. theres a devil in my dick and some demons in my semen

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
ol dicky dork dicked the thism

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
Christians should read Zealot: the Life and Times of Jesus of Nazareth. By putting Jesus and the Bible in an historical context, it pretty much smashes the idea of any literal truth to the Bible.

I Am A Robot
Jul 1, 2006

Snatch Duster posted:

atheism is bunk

dick dorkins ruined it and its not cool any more

nah

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

you don't get it cuz you are a robot

Hemingway To Go!
Nov 10, 2008

im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i'll always Respect my enemys.
- ernest hemingway
24) Sometime eight to ten thousand years ago, Rita Repulsa sought to conquer many worlds in the universe. Among the opposition was Zordon. War broke out between Zordon and the factions of Rita. This war stretched for 2,000 years and across countless planets.

In the closing days of the war, Zordon challenged Rita to a final meeting in which the fate of the universe would be decided through a coin toss. Using the Power Coins, Zordon won the coin toss and sealed Rita and her minions into a space dumpster where they were to reside for eternity, but Rita would enact one final act of defiance by using her powers to banish Zordon into a time warp in which he existed outside normal time. His only communication with the outside world would be through an energy tube.

PsionicAnt
Jul 16, 2001
666.) LOL

Jabberlock
Nov 29, 2014



Applewhite posted:

Christians should read Zealot: the Life and Times of Jesus of Nazareth. By putting Jesus and the Bible in an historical context, it pretty much smashes the idea of any literal truth to the Bible.

how can the bible be wrong when it is the truth?

Hemingway To Go!
Nov 10, 2008

im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i'll always Respect my enemys.
- ernest hemingway

ur wrong, it's actually

616) LOL

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RaceBannon
Apr 3, 2010
overheard Christians discussing how angry they get that their neighbours mow their lawns on Sunday

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